I remember the day I first met you. You looked at the sky waiting for something to happen. You were so lost in thought that I wondered if time just stopped right there just so I can take in your beauty. Of course, I had to ruin the moment because of clumsy me forgot that I was supposed to meet my new roommates. I scared her, and she quickly looked at me with a shocked look. I felt like she really hated me for ruining her moment, but her eyes softened and gave me a small smile. I knew I was smiling back but somehow it didn’t feel like the usual ones I give to people.

I was overjoyed when I found out that you were going to be one of the many roommates that I would be co-existing with. I wanted to get to know you more and I thought you felt the same as you were the one who stayed behind to clean up while everyone retired to their rooms. You asked me how my first day was and how this home was going to be a place where I can be me without anyone judging.

I didn’t know how to act around you anymore. My roommates told me that you were a flirt and that I was your next target. I didn’t want to believe them I wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt but they just kept bringing more and more evidence about you getting around with anything that walked the earth and so I listened to them. I kept my distance and you just let me.

I saw you lingering in the hallway wanting to join the laughter, but you never did. Your eyes held so much pain that you left the hallway and retreated to who knows where. I tried going after you, but I was always sidetracked by the others that I forgot about you. It happened over and over and over again that I think I never questioned why they would try and leave you out of their lives. Have you done something to them to make them hate you? I don’t know anything anymore.

Yoohyeon looked at the brightly lit screen that held a photo of Sua lost in thought again while playing with her elephant plushie. Yoohyeon hugged her Eevee plushie that was given to her by someone. She didn’t know who it was but the plushie was right in front of her door one day on her birthday.

“When are you coming back, Sua?” Yoohyeon whined while a tear fell from her eye as she remembered the red-head pulling Sua away like her life depended on it. Her heart stung as she didn’t like how the red-head was so familiar with Sua. She also didn’t like how Sua didn’t do anything to get her to stop. She bites her lip as she pulled her plushie closer to her.

She couldn’t sleep even if her life depended on it, so she began tossing and turning on her bed.

Why does your face looked so relieved when you left here Sua Unnie? Why does my heart feel this way about you? Why is it that despite the warnings the other roommates gave me I want to get to know you better? Yoohyeon pondered as she wanted answers.

Dear Diary,

Sua Unnie didn’t come home again today and I don’t know why she isn’t coming back. My heart drops to my stomach knowing that I didn’t see her again. Siyeon Unnie and Dami aren’t telling me anything about Sua Unnie. I worry about her. My thoughts are being consumed by her and I want to know why.

I tried looking for Sua Unnie’s room the other day but all I found was nothing and an empty room that looks like it hasn’t been touched for years now. I don’t have much of her items with me and it makes me cry knowing I don’t have too much of her to remember. I feel like she disappeared without a trace. Maybe the red head knows where she is. I miss her. I want to be next to her. I want to see her.

These days lately I’ve been buying and craving more and more mint chocolate. I don’t know why but I do. I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep much tonight, but I’ll try. Guess I should go back to gaming until next time diary.

Dear Diary,

What should I say that is new that I haven’t told you already? I’ve been writing so many things about Sua to you that I think you might get sick of me…

I feel like I’m being fake to my roommates. They all seem so happy like they have just been freed from something bad. I asked what they were happy about, but they just tell me that I’ll understand that people like Sua Unnie shouldn’t be in the company of innocent people. My heart hurted in that moment. I wanted to defend her, but I couldn’t. I was scared of myself.

I don’t know who to consult to about these feelings of mine and I can’t seem to find the person who is making me feel this way. I want you back Sua Unnie. Please come back for me?

Dear Diary,

I saw Sua Unnie today… she looked so sad and tired. She was so thin that she didn’t look like herself anymore. I wanted to go up to her and say hey, but it sounded dumb in my head, so I just watched her. She cried. I don’t know why she cried but I wanted her to stop so I showed my face to her. She looked at me with that blank stare of I don’t know what to do or maybe who is this and how should I respond kind you know?

Sua Unnie just silently cried as she looked as me she then said.

“Hey,” That’s all she said but her voice was so broken and hoarse that it sent tingles to my spine. I smiled at her and she gave me a smile before that red head called out to her. Sua Unnie waved good bye to me and went to the red head.

I think I know the reason why I like mint chocolate. Sua Unnie is the one who gives me the fresh air in my life… I think, and she is always so sweet to me that I want her back in my life. I want to know her better but how should I do it?

I have all these words to tell her but none of them seem right to say. I want to say hey, but it seems that it doesn't mean anything. All these scenarios and questions swim in my mind but all I can do is just watch Sua Unnie be taken from me again from the red head. Maybe I should dye my hair red and then Sua Unnie will look at me… Yeah that sounds nice. I’ll gain her attention and she can approach me and say something nice instead of me looking like a pabo.

Thanks for listening to my rant Diary. I have an Unnie to look at my way till next time