Chapter 4

A mother, what she should feel now, watching her daughter running for someone like her life depend in the someone. Someone, someone that she despised of. Roseanne Park. Roseanne Park with blonde hair and brown eyes. She really hates the blonde but watching her daughter chasing after someone she hates gave her undescribed feeling, mix emotion. Her daughter screaming for the blonde, running for the blonde to stay. Her daughter tripped in midway running after the blonde. It’s look hurt, but she can’t do anything. She loves her daughter but she can’t be like a typical mother who will console her daughter now.

“Is this what you want, Mrs Kim?”

“What do you mean, Hyun Suk, or should I call you CEO Yang?” Mrs Kim replied, her eyes still on the figure far away from them on the road, tearing after the blonde.

“Look, you may be her mother, but Blackpink are my daughters, I love them like a father love his child.”

“Whatever you want to describe yourself but Jennie is my daughter, so I’ll be the one who will decide her future and the most thing, her future is not with Blackpink”

CEO Yang sigh, shaking his head, looking at Jennie afar. “You should go console her Mrs Kim, she might be bleeding now.”

Mrs Kim shook her head, “I can’t, I’ve my strong image so I can’t show her the otherwise.”

CEO Yang chuckles, “You’ve strong image or you feel guilty?”

Mrs Kim clutching her teeth, hearing the words coming from someone made her blood risen.

“What do you mean again CEO Yang?” She asked, holding her temper as hard she can.

“You know well what I mean Mrs Kim. It’s because of you Blackpink disbanded. You blackmailed me! And now your daughter hated me because of that!”

“It’s not my fault, Blackpink is not for my daughter, she deserves better”

“And you crushed her life.” CEO Yang words going through Mrs Kim like a venom. Mrs Kim her hand firmly.

“She deserves it, she’s pathetic, the one who should be blame at is her not me.”

“Whatever you said Mrs Kim, she’s one of my child, don’t accuse her like that!”

Mrs Kim smirks, “But we know well, that she’s the one who accepted it, so it’s not my fault.”

CEO Yang stay silent, because it was right, Rose signed to quit. Why she did that?

“Why did you sign it?”

“It was the only way”

“What way?”

“I’m sorry if I was selfish but I want it, I don’t want to be in Blackpink anymore.”

“What on the earth happened with you Rose?”

Rose runs into The Royal Melbourne Hospital, her breathing hard, bumping with people in her way but never care to apologize. Continue her way toward an emergency ward. Her last call with her sister at the airport hunted in her mind,

“Hello Alice”

“Rose! Rose… papa m-mama th-they-“

“What happened to them?!”

“Th-they in emergency ward now”

Rose runs faster, looking for the ward. Her suitcase was nowhere to be seen. Her mind is only for her parents. If anything happened with her parents, she’ll never going to forgive herself. Rose sees her sister Alice with her husband beside. Rose running up towards them,

“What happened?! Why they’re in hospital?!” Rose held Alice’s shoulders firmly. She’s scared, if anything happened with her parents…. ‘God Please, don’t take them away, I only have them in my life now’

“Car crash, hit-and-run accident.” Alice cheeks stained with tears. She must be cried all the time now.

‘Hit-and-run accident’ They waiting outside the emergency room, Rose bites her nails, a habit if she were nervous. Rose pacing forwards and backwards, her heart beating fast. The only thing she can hear is her hard breathing and her beating heart. The voices in the emergency room covered with sound proof glasses.

Alice can’t bare looking at her sister pacing, hug Rose tightly. Rose reciprocate the gesture immediately, she needs it, she need a comfort.

At last, a doctor coming out from the room that took forever, but Rose knows, with the doctor face shown, she knows that it’s not going to be a good new. No, she can’t hear the words, she won’t hear ‘I’m sorry, we did our best’, She can’t hear that words. But, fate not going with what we want.

“I’m sorry, we did our best” Then, Rose collapsed, her knees are weak, she can’t feel her feet, she can’t feel anything. Her mind is blank, words are not come out from .

“Oh my god, Rose!” Rose fell in Alice arms, she let out her tears, screaming after her parents. She clutches her chest with her right hand, feeling it hurt. Her heart beats in pain. Her chest heavy, like a big block humps on her chest. She can’t forgive herself,

“This is my fault, my fault, m-my fault” Rose sobs in Alice arms, while her other hand clutching Alice’s sleeve. “W-why they left, why they left me? Didn’t they love me?”

Alice hugs Rose tightly, putting Rose head on her chest, caress Rose hair softly. “Shhh, sure they love you, they love you…but they need to go, it was their fate, they’ve done their journey in this world.”

“B-but why? Why me? Why God take everything from me? Why God take the people that I love from me? Why? Why my fate is like this? Why I can’t be happy? Tell me Alice… tell me, why w-why? Why?!” Rose punches her chest hard, hoping for the pain to go away.

Rose cried, crying for her fate, crying for the cruel world toward her. Crying for someone that she love. Crying for happiness. “God, why you give me happiness if I can’t reach it?” Rose asked it again.

“I can’t lose them, I can’t accept that they’ve gone, I can’t Alice, not after I lose the love of my life. Not after I’ve been in such pain, not at this time. It hurts Alice, it hurts, h-help me, please help me! P-please!” Rose pleaded for her strength, to move on, to face the life, to face this cruel world.

2 days before now

Lisa is on her way to studio in YG Entertainment, Lisa and Jisoo still under YG as a solo singer but not Jennie. Jennie didn’t want to further contract with YG because she blamed YG for the disbanded of Blackpink. Jennie through hard time to make a contract with any agencies that can take her as a solo singer. Lisa wished that she can do it also but she not affordable. She’s not as strong as Jennie. Jennie is determined, she hope she can be like Jennie. Jennie is her idol.

“How much longer Oppa?” Lisa got the same manager when she still as a Blackpink, so she really close with her manager.

“mmm, about 10 minutes.”

“mmm…” Lisa humming, “…actually Oppa, last night I met with Rose” the information took Lisa manager by surprise, he snaps her head toward Lisa.

“W-wow, how you met her?”

“She came to my apartment.” Lisa gives a glance toward her manager beside her. Lisa also make sure that her driver far front her didn’t hear the conversation.

“It shocked me, I mean, out of your four she’s the only one who don’t be a singer when she was a main vocal in Blackpink. “

Lisa nods, agree with the statements. “It also surprised me. Why she won’t further her contract?” Lisa remind that Rose’s dream is to be a successful singer, but why she didn’t do anything about it. She talked a bit with Rose last night but all Rose did was avoid her questions. She just answered simple questions only. Lisa didn’t even know her work now. Roseanne Park, the one who left Jennie behind two years ago. Left us without any messages. What happened with her and Jennie? Didn’t they live together but why out of sudden Rose left? Jennie didn’t even want to talk about it.

“Lisa, did you mad at CEO Yang?, as we know Jennie still mad at him.” Lisa’s manager fumbling with his words. Lisa never talk about it with his manager, Lisa didn’t even think about her feeling to CEO YG, she just move on and build a new life.

“I don’t know, maybe I’m not that mad to Yang sajangnim, because I didn’t think hard about it.” Lisa wanted to further the conversation about Jennie but Lisa herself doesn’t know why Jennie still take it hard, still be mad at Yang sajangnim, it has been two years. “But, why did you ask Oppa?”

Lisa’s manager fidgeting his fingers, thinking the right words to say, “I don’t know if this is my place to say, but I saw Rose signing contract to quit Blackpink before the announcement.”

Lisa is shocked, this new information is big for Lisa taking it. Every member should sign the contract after the announcement not the other way. “How did you know Oppa?”

“The day Rose went to sign the contract, I was there. I accompanied her.”

Lisa nods, taking the information clearly. End up, Lisa’s mind full with thought about Rose along her work time. Lisa had asked a private agent to get information about Rose being in Australia and her family.

A day before now

Two women facing each other at door frame, the blonde and the brunette. The blonde stood 5 cm tall than the brunette with a mere smile on her face while the brunette face is blank. Jennie shocked, surprised that the blonde is in front of her, the blonde that left her two years ago. The blonde, the most important person in her life. The person that she can’t forget until now. She thought she had move on but seeing the blonde in front of her made her realised that she hasn’t let her go. Hasn’t let the blonde fade away from her mind, especially her heart. A blank space will always fill with the blonde smile, the blonde face, the blonde voice, the blonde soft lips, the blonde soft hand, the blonde warm embrace, the blonde name, Roseanne Park.

“It has been long right, Jennie-unnie?” Yes, Jennie Kim the only one person that Rose will call Unnie in this world. Jennie is beautiful, always beautiful, now seeing her again made Rose feel tingles in her stomach. It’s like butterflies were disturbed in a cave that make they fly all over her stomach. It’s seems that her stomach had filled with butterflies but they were sleep because she lost her light in her life. She lost the light of her life, Jennie Kim. The one and only Rose will cherish in this world, the only one Rose thought that possible her to fell the meaning of love. But she can’t reach it, she can’t hold it, she can’t keep her in her arms.

They were in living room, the room that they and the other two members hang out. The room where they giggling, laughing, playing games, the room that full with their memories as a Blackpink. Bittersweet memories. Rose looks around, amused that the house never changed even for two years, she had never thought that Jennie would buy it.

“Ehem, I-I don’t know what to serve you, I mean I don’t have anything actually at this moment, so-“ Jennie fumbles with her words while fidgeting with her fingers. Awkward atmosphere accompanying them.

“It’s okay, you shouldn’t serve me, I’m just give a visit,” Rose steals a glance toward the brunette in front her, Jennie wore a blue long blouse that surpass her knees, ‘she looks beautiful, like always’ Light make up, lips covered with lip balm. “I’m not going to long here.” No, Rose hopes to be long here, staring at the beautiful creation in front her now. But she knows, she can’t, she can’t be selfish, she won’t let Jennie suffer because of her anymore.

Jennie stares at Rose eyes, finding her words to reply but numb, the words not come out, but at the first place Jennie didn’t even know what she wanted to say. Look at the silence brunette in front her, Rose opens , “I think I shouldn’t have come here, I better get going” Rose lift her body, stand on her feet.

“Are you not going to come back?” Jennie asked, the question, the question heard as she wanted to ask for two years ago. But Rose answering it with sincerity,

“No, this is for the last time. I move out, I’m not going to stay at Australia either.” Jennie didn’t surprise with the answer, she had thought that Rose come here to say last goodbye. But is it Jennie strong enough to let Rose go for a second time in front of her? Did she can accept at the lost of Rose? No, Jennie can’t, life without Rose for two years is hell for her. She felt blank, zero, nothingness in her life. Even though, her mother is there, but she can’t feel it. Her mother is lack, lacking at showing her love toward her. Jennie didn’t even know is it her mother love her or not.

“I should get going” Rose said, turning herself toward the main door, to go away. Go away, leaving Jennie behind one more time. However, one more time Jennie rush after her not letting her go this time, Jennie hugs Rose from behind, bumping her head on Rose’s left shoulder.

“Please, don’t leave me in pain again”

“W-what do you mean?” Heard Jennie words, made butterflies tickles in her stomach again.

“Make memory to me.”

Memory

Memory

Last time

“Then, would you go a date with me Jennie-unnie?”

“Sure, I would”

They go date at fun fair, well Jennie recommended that. They went there with Rose’s car, even though Jennie protested to go with her car well this was their first date.

“Wow, there are lot of people here” Jennie exclaimed excitedly. The place full with stalls that sold many kind of things, foods, clothes, and lastly games. Rose is ghosting to food while Jennie ghosting to games.

“Unnie! I want to eat mango! Look there are mangoes!”

“Argh, came on Rose! I want to play game! We had had many foods!”

They both bickering each other with their hands still linked to each other. The scene attracted people attention toward the couple.

“Is that Jennie?”

“Eah, you right. It’s Jennie! Wait a minute, I think the woman beside her is Rose right her ex bandmate”

“Wow, it’s Jennie, I really like her!”

Lots of murmurs heard around them. They panicked at the situation,

“Jennie unnie” Rose whispers on Jennie’s ear,

“What?” Jennie also talk in whisper

“Lets run after three”

“W-what”

“1…2…3 Runs unnie!” Rose pulls Jennie, running together away from people. “W-whoa Rose slow down!”

Rose didn’t slow her pace ended up Jennie who stumble to gain Rose pace. They run and runs with their hands entwining firmly to each other. Jennie smiles looking at their joining hands. But her smiles faded at the thought of that this was a last time and Rose didn’t even want this. Rose doesn’t like her.

Last time

After far from people, they realised they at a big tree and a round spindle on the logs. Rose stares at the spindle, ‘What is this thing?’ Then something coming across her toward the spindle.

“Rose!” Jennie pushes Jennie forward, stumbling Rose falls on the back with Jennie on her. “Yah! Do you want to die!”

“W-what happened?”

“It was a board for dart throw don’t you know? Where did you leaned your ears that you didn’t hear me shouting!”

“Jennie stop! You’re drawing attentions again. God, it’s so difficult to have a date with famous person”

Jennie glares at Rose, with a face saying ‘say-that-again’ “Err, it was a compliment, well having a date with a famous people is an honour you know.” Rose let out an awkward laugh.

Jennie walking ahead with Rose trailing behind her with a solemn face. “Jennie, come on don’t be mad. I promise I’ll not going to do it again. I’ll behave, I’ll hear every words that coming out from that beautiful mouth of yours. Please don’t be mad, pwetty please”

Rose holds Jennie right-hand with both of her hands, putting an innocent face as she could. Jennie holds her smile, ‘God, why her face is so cute!’

“Ehem, okay but in one condition” Jennie lift one of her hand, showing her finger point. “You and I will ride the ferris wheel”

They are on a cubicle, riding ferris wheel. They sat facing each other. They look at their surround, feeling to be in a high place is exciting for both of them. They like high place.

“I like it here, to be in such a high place, I think of free” Jennie started the conversation while staring at the blue sky. Rose didn’t say anything, she observes the brunette in front her.

Last time

Rose closes her eyes, finding a pair of brown cat-eyes looking at her when she opened her eyes. Jennie eyes met with her eyes, Jennie eyes filled with emotion. The way she look at her, made Rose realised how important is she for Jennie but she can’t. I’m sorry Jennie.

I like you

Rose reminded, the confession that Jennie made three years ago. The confession that she left hanging without an answer. ‘How I wish I can answer it Jennie. I wish I can say it’

Last time

“I like it also, here” Rose hold her stares toward Jennie eyes. “here with you, I like it”

Jennie let a weak smile play on her face, she thought that Rose just faking it because Jennie asked for make a memory to her. ‘Rose just being nice’

“Thank you” Jennie said, many meanings behind her thanks, ‘thank you for make me happy, thank you for asked me a date, thank you for faking your feeling just to make me happy, thank you for made me feel love, thank you for everything’

Thank you for being there in my life.

Thanks for subscribes, comments and votes. I really appreciate it. Tonight I'll post scene, I need to split the scene from this chapter because I want to keep my story clean but I'll give it a chance to people who want to read it.

before now, means now was for the time at first chapter.