This chapter is dedicated to all the women and men who have loved without asking for anything in return. I hope you do not lose yourselves in the process.

 To unconditional love.

Chapter 10. Part 2: Jennie

“Unnie, are you okay?” Chaeng asked Jennie. “You seem to be spacing out, are you alright?” Jennie then smiled gently. “Yes, I’m okay. I’ve just been thinking how Lisa was right the night we were in Tokyo. Things could have been easier if we had simpler lives. I guess at this point, I’ve already invested so much time that I can’t really remember how it was when we still had normal lives.” Jennie explained.

“Unnie, You and Lisa think about these things so much. Why not try and just live in the moment and see where things go from there instead of looking back and then wistfully hope for things to be different?” Chaeng suggested.

“Easier said than done” Jennie sighed.

“I’ve been messing up a lot lately Chaeng, I don’t know how to do this. I don’t know how to react and most of all, I’m losing my mind because I can’t seem to do right by Lisa. I end up hurting her and if you know me, I never intended to. My judgement gets clouded as these emotions continue to pour and I don’t know how to put all of that back in. It’s like the water has been spilled and I can’t return it back into the glass and I’m at a point where I wished I never came into your hotel room that night. I wish I never heard what I heard because I was fine before that.” Jennie expressed her frustration.

“Although, I have been doing a lot of thinking lately, I feel like I’ve been so wrong this whole time. I got so invested towards making sure Lisa gets the best experience of her life, I wanted to make sure she wasn’t excluded, that she got the same offer as we did and I might have done a little more than that because it pushed her to be as confident as she is to the point that she’s made a name for herself already. People love her, I’ve never been so proud of that but I didn’t realize helping her achieve all of that wasn’t something she truly ever dreamed of. I only wanted for her to reach for the stars but I didn’t realize she was starting to build a façade wherein she isn’t being her whole self anymore. I did that to her and in the process, I also lost myself. I don’t know how to deal with me Chaeng and it feels so bad.”

As Jennie sat silently, Chaeng felt bad for what’s been happening with her friends. She wished she could help but she knew, what she can offer is her shoulder to lean on and lend her ears to listen as the girl speaks her heart out.

“Chaeng, Is it okay if I want to be alone for a bit? Jennie asked. “Okay unnie, but please, call me when you need me. I’ll be in the other room. Okay? We’re all here. You’ll get through this. I know you and Lisa can do it!” The girl said as she hugged Jennie and exited the room.

The day Jennie met Lisa was as clear as she could remember. - She remembered how different Lisa looked from others and how she simply stood out from the rest. She thought, “Wow, she’s incredibly tall.” As the music started, Jennie saw how the girl move as if she and the music became one.  She was amazed by how graceful this girl was and wanted to meet her right away. She then approached the girl. “Hi! I’m Jennie! Nice to meet you! By the way, welcome to the group! What is your name?”

The girl then looked at Jennie as if a deer caught in the headlights. “Hi, I’m Lisa. N-nice to meet you too.” The girl barely spoke. Jennie thought she looked very shy, quite different from her aura when she dances. “Hey! Don’t be shy! We’re going to be working together for a very long time! I’m here to help if you need anything.” Jennie smiled at the girl thoughtfully.

“Thank you Jennie-unnie.”Lisa said appreciatively. “I hope we can work well together. I still have a lot to learn and our boss required me to learn the culture and language as fast as possible if I wanted to stay here.” The girl said shyly as if she was embarrassed.

“Don’t worry about it! I and the rest of the group will help you out!” Jennie encouraged the girl. From that point, she and Lisa would always stay together from the studio, up to their breaks, day offs, night offs and all the way to their dorm. Jennie always encouraged Lisa and praised her for her talents. She tells her how good she’s been doing and how well she’s been adjusting.

Whenever their respective families came to visit them, Jennie felt bad when Lisa didn’t have anyone visiting her as her parents both lived overseas. She knew Lisa was lonely behind the smiles she pro