She always thought October 26th would be a difficult day but she never expected it to be the day that would inevitably change her life.

The day she first met Bomi was October 26th, it was also the day of her mom's birthday, the first one since she passed away in July. She expected the funeral to provide her with some form of closure but when she returned to Seoul a month later, she still felt grief-stricken. She had been rehearsing for her first Seoul Arts Center audition with Eunji when she received the phone call from her dad informing her that her mom had suffered a heart attack.

She can still remember the noise her cell phone made as it made contact with her wooden floor. It's consequent cracked screen an accurate representation of her heart.

Eunji had wanted to fly to Cheongju with her but she had declined. If Eunji had come, it would have been because she was expecting Chorong to need comfort and support. She would only need those things if the worst happened and she couldn't think negatively, mainly because she needed to hold on to some hope, no matter how small.

It hurt too much otherwise.

Her mom had always been her own personal superhero, even when both she and her dad were unfortunately inundated with flu, her mom never fell ill. As a child, whenever she felt sick, even though it wasn't often, her mom would always take care of her and after her heart attack; it was her turn to do the same.

Two days after she landed in Cheongju, she died.

She stills finds herself crying at little things, the sight of her mom's favourite movie in the television listings or finding an old birthday card with her hand writing on.

Surprisingly, she managed to hold it together on the phone to her girlfriend, calmly informing her of her mom's death and asking her if she could fly to Cheongju. Eunji boarded a plane straight away and although she managed to keep her feelings intact on the phone, the sight of her girlfriend was all it took for her to break down.

They say there that when somebody is affected by a death, they experience five stages of grief; denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Chorong certainly experienced them all, remaining in the fourth stage longer than the others.

They'd been dating for just six months at the time of her mom's death and whilst Chorong loves everything about Eunji, she loves some of her attributes just that little bit more. Her kindness, how considerate she is and how she is always there for Chorong. During and after the funeral, Eunji was there for her, when she needed somebody to talk to and somebody to just hold her when she didn't feel like talking. Occasionally, she would slip back into the second stage of grief, anger, but Eunji never questioned her on it, instead she allowed Chorong to let off steam, even if it was directed at her.

Eunji stayed in Cheongju with Chorong for the funeral and two weeks afterwards, never being anything but perfect whilst Chorong stayed with her dad for an extra month before flying back to Seoul in an attempt to move on.

On October 26th, Eunji was there for her yet again. She had been dreading the day ever since her mom passed away and Eunji knew that but had enough tact to not mention it. Chorong knew that a part of her heart would always remain broken as a result of her death but certain days would hurt more than most.

The anniversary of her death, her birthday and the festive season.

Her initial plan had been to spend the day in Cheongju with her dad but he had chosen to spend the day with his brother, something to take his mind off the day. He thought it would be beneficial to the pair of them if they did something that would enable them to think about something else day rather than wallow in misery together. Her dad didn't want her to put her life on hold and she's still trying to heed that advice, although Bomi is her latest distraction, her mom still crosses her mind most days. Her second plan had been to spend the day alone but Eunji wouldn't allow that, she agreed with Jongin, if she spent it alone, she'd only end up thinking about Crystal. Instead, Chorong and Eunji spent the day together, Eunji trying to make it as painless as possible for her girlfriend, trying to make her forget what day it was.

Even if only for a second.

Chorong thought she'd love how Eunji was there for her, like she had after the funeral but for some reason, her kindness and attentive nature annoyed Chorong and in turn, she started an argument.

The first argument in their nine month relationship.

After Chorong had slammed the door of her girlfriend's apartment and walked away, she didn't have any idea where to go. Part of her thought about going to Namjoo's apartment but she decided against it, she hadn't met Namjoo's fiancée yet and didn't think that was the right time to meet her. She needed some form of relief; she needed something that would make her stop thinking about how she should be celebrating her mom's fifty-fifth birthday in Cheongju with her parents.

Every year since she moved to Seoul, she would return home for her parents' birthdays and they would all celebrate with a family meal and a night of board games and movies. The year before her death, she had been too busy with work to make the trip. At the time she thought nothing of it, her mom would have plenty more birthdays.

She never knew that that would be her last one.

That's one of the reasons she thinks she felt worse on October 26th than normal, because she should have made the effort to see her the previous year.

One wrong turn and she found herself in a bar, one that she would never normally frequent. She hovered by the door and observed her environment. The dance floor was filled with young people grinding against one another and raucous chatter floated through the air. She stood at the bar in an attempt to buy a drink but as people shoved past her and pushed her out of the way, she felt completely out of her comfort zone.

Her eyes briefly fell on a blonde woman standing at the other end of a bar, engaged in what looked like flirtatious banter.

Eventually she received a drink, once the people surrounding her dispersed and she headed towards a seat in the corner in the hope that she would be able to blend into the background; she had a habit of doing that.

Despite the vibrating music which echoed around the bar, Chorong found herself coated in silence. A silence which turned out to be dangerous and she soon found out that Eunji was right. Being alone caused her to think about her mom and sure enough, the tears started falling.

She'd never really given death much thought, all four of her grandparents died before she was born and she had been fortunate to not lose any family or friends until her mom. Marcus Tullius Cicero, a Roman philosopher, said that 'the life of the dead is placed in the memory of the living' and although Chorong chooses to seek comfort in that quotation because as long as she continues to remember her mom, she'll never be forgotten, the very choice can also be the cause of her tears.

By remembering her and the good times they shared, she in turns remembers her death. It's a vicious circle which she can't escape from.

Through the masses of people, she saw a flash of blonde hair once more except that time the woman didn't seem as invested in the flirtatious banter as she had been previously.

Disappearing into the shadows of the bar seemed to be working; she sat there for under an hour before a rather boisterous young man approached her and sat down. He asked her if she wanted a drink and when she ignored him, he simply shifted his offer away from a drink and towards a dance. She admired his determination but she wasn't in the mood to entertain him for the night. After telling him in no uncertain terms that she had no interest in him and stating that his cocky attitude and wannabe swagger was probably his way to disguise the fact that he's undercompensating in other more important areas, her eyes lingering on his trousers long enough to ensure he fully understood what she meant, he slunk back to his friends, ego sufficiently bruised.

It only took less than two minutes before she was approached by somebody else, this time it was Bomi, the very blonde she had been watching. Like with the previous man, Chorong rejected Bomi's offer for a drink before asking genuinely whether the blonde asked women if she could buy them drinks in the hope that it would result in ual . Undeterred, Bomi had sat across from her and started a conversation.

The conversation soon spiralled out of control and Chorong found herself enjoying Bomi's company as well as the mediocre chat-up lines Bomi sent her way. Once she had found herself in the bar, her plan had been to have one drink. Namjoo always told her during high school that liquor makes everything better, at least for a little while but after being thrown up by the very same girl who had advocated the benefits of alcohol, she decided to avoid the substance altogether.

But that night, she thought it might come in handy, just once.

She finally relented and allowed Bomi to buy her a drink and their conversation quickly continued, Chorong putting forward a false name rather than the truth before analysing the blonde. She had always had an ability to read somebody and Bomi was no exception. She could tell from Bomi's reactions, no matter how minute they were, that her description was an accurate one.

Surprisingly, the description didn't deter Bomi, if anything it amused her, but when Chorong's phone rang and she saw the name Eunji flash up on her called I.D., panic seeped through her body and the memory of her girlfriend came to the forefront of her mind.

There she was enjoying somebody else's company, knowing full well that Bomi wouldn't just be satisfied with a conversation. Knowing that Bomi was angling for something more to happen that night and Chorong wasn't pushing her away.

After her phone rang two more times, Bomi's curiosity got the better of her and the curiosity certainly killed the cat in this instance. Chorong shifted from enjoying Bomi's company to wanting the blonde to go away, mainly out of fear that she'd do something she'd regret.

Or something she wouldn't regret, that was the scarier thought.

Before she left, Bomi gave her a parting gift, an accurate description of what Chorong was like and it turned out Chorong wasn't the only one who had an ability to read people. For some reason Chorong felt the need to correct Bomi about her relationship status, even though admitting she wasn't dating her high school sweetheart didn't change the fact that she was dating somebody.

Once Bomi left, Chorong continued to order drinks, finding with each drink she drank, her confidence grew to the point where she shoved past people at the bar rather than let them push past her. Nobody disturbed her after she harshly told Bomi to leave her alone and even though she looked, she didn't find the blonde in the bar again. When she stumbled out of the bar, she had every intention of going back home but sometimes even the best laid plans go awry. Having not drank alcohol for years, it affected her more than she had anticipated it would but at least one good thing came from it.

Namjoo had been right. It had succeeded in making her feel better.

A question floated towards her laced in a husky tone and she saw Bomi resting against a wall, her right foot balancing on it and a cigarette dangling between two fingers on her left hand. She had looked the epitome of cool and trouble free. She stumbled over to her, revelling in the blonde's touch as Bomi wrapped an arm around her waist to steady her.

Their conversation inside the bar had been laced with a disguised flirtatious tone but there was no hiding the flirtatious tone that filled the conversation they shared outside the bar. The alcohol had lowered her inhibitions and she soon found herself complimenting Bomi, giving the blonde the only push she really needed.

The gap between them that already seemed non-existent was closed ever so slightly by Bomi before Chorong closed it completely and before she knew it, her back was pressed against the wall and Bomi's body was flushed against her, the blonde's mouth working wonders over her.

Everything about the kiss had been wrong yet it felt so right at the same time.

In that moment and for the rest of the night, she didn't have a girlfriend; she wasn't in a committed relationship. Instead, she was anything Bomi wanted her to be.

When Bomi had husked for her to go back to her apartment, Chorong found herself nodding and the cab ride there seemed to be over before it had even begun. Before Bomi, Chorong had only slept with two people, Changsub, her first boyfriend and Eunji. Bomi was most certainly right when she stated that Chorong was inexperienced when it came to .

Undoubtedly more inexperienced than Bomi has ever been.

Hands flew everywhere once they entered the safe haven of Bomi's apartment and she can remember the sound of something smashing as it hit the floor but at the time neither woman cared.

Neither woman had eyes for anything else that night except for each other.

When Bomi had pulled away to make sure it was what Chorong wanted, that she didn't just want to leave, Chorong felt something stir in the pit of her stomach.

Her heart had soared with adoration at Bomi's words. She never expected somebody who was obviously so prone to one-night stands to care that much about the other person's feelings.

ual with Changsub never lasted very long, he didn't have the stamina for it and she was often left unsatisfied but she dealt with it because she was in love with him.

ual with Eunji was different; the auburn-haired woman took her time and made sure to cherish every part of Chorong's body, whispering how beautiful she was over and over again. Something which Chorong always appreciated because the reassurance calmed her nerves.

She never has had confidence in her body.

With Bomi, everything was rushed and rough, nothing like she was used to but she wanted to experience it over and over again. In that apartment, Chorong felt like she was losing her ity all over again.

As the blonde stripped her of her clothes, the worries about her body resurfaced and she prayed that Bomi wouldn't compare her to everybody she's slept with because she would most certainly not feature in the top spot. When she had tried to cover up, Bomi had chortled and told her to stop it, told her not to be ridiculous.

Bomi whispered words like 'y' and 'ing hot' into her ear rather than beautiful but for some reason, she felt more reassured with those words. Perhaps because it was a one-night stand and those words were appropriate for the situation.

Beautiful is a word that should be uttered by a partner. Somebody that loves you not somebody who just wants .

Even though she isn't a fan of coarse language, somehow listening to obscenities fall from Bomi's lips turned her on. The words sounded perfect in her husky voice and Chorong hoped she would continue to spout profanities.

The feeling of losing her ity resurfaced when she started laying kisses down the blonde's stomach. Everything felt so incredibly new yet astonishingly familiar at the same time. Bomi's breathy moans spurred her on and she doesn't think she's ever seen a more perfect sight than the one of the blonde thrashing about on her bed with pleasure.

Afterwards, she didn't know what the protocol was. She'd never had a one-night stand before, never even dreamed of having one so she wasn't sure whether she was supposed to leave or stay. Bomi answered her unasked question by kissing her tenderly, a start contrast from the roughness of her actions moments earlier, and telling her to go to sleep.

Chorong rolled onto her back whilst Bomi to her side and suddenly, it didn't matter that they were sharing the same bed because a space had appeared between them. For the first time that night, Chorong felt uncomfortable.

She's always liked the comfort of cuddling after , the comfort of having somebody else to share the moment with but when Bomi fell straight asleep, Chorong felt dirty.

She had cheated on her girlfriend but the worst part was that she had enjoyed it. She had enjoyed a liaison with somebody who couldn't be classed as anything but a stranger. The guilt flooded over her as she lay wrapped in somebody else's bed sheets, the memory of what they'd just done hanging in the air. Chorong observed Bomi silently for several seconds, listening to her snore softly, oblivious to the inner turmoil Chorong was having and before she knew it, Chorong was dressed once more and leaving the apartment as quietly as she could.

That night she had walked the nearby streets contemplating her actions before hailing a cab and it was her girlfriend's address which fell from her lips rather than her own. The cab came to a halt outside Eunji's building a short time later and the guilt which lingered in her stomach suddenly intensified and her legs froze.

She couldn't face her girlfriend still tipsy and with another woman's perfume hovering over her. She apologised to the driver before giving him her own address.

As she lay in her own bed, thankful that Sana hadn't heard her come in at two a.m., her liaison with Bomi played over and over again in her mind. A movie that never ended, it just kept replaying on a loop. Every time she closed her eyes, she would picture Bomi's face as Chorong curled her fingers, deliciously hitting that spot that sent the blonde wild.

Overcome by guilt and disappointment in herself, Chorong cried herself that night for the first time since she was thirteen.

To this day, she still hasn't decided if the guilt was due more to cheating or from enjoying it.

As she rolls over in bed, she casts a gaze at Eunji sleeping peacefully beside her. She's envious of her girlfriend right now, blissfully ignorant in her dreams whilst she lies awake, her mind plagued with thoughts about Bomi.

When she told Bomi she regretted their kiss and asked if they could pretend it never happened, she expected the blonde to put up some sort of fight. She didn't expect the blonde to meet her demands immediately, without even attempting to change her mind.

One minute Chorong feels as if Bomi really likes her and really wants to be with her but when she told her nothing else was going to happen and Bomi didn't show much emotion, she can't help but think everything that's happening between them is just a game to the blonde.

She can remember Eunji warning her about her best friend, the advice had been said with humour but Chorong had detected an underlying serious tone.

Maybe Eunji had been right, maybe the lines between flirting and crossing a line are blurred for Bomi and that's how she likes them.

Before the kiss, she knew she'd started looking at Bomi differently, less as a friend and more as a romantic interest but she had chosen to suppress those feelings because she's in a committed relationship. One thing she has never wanted to do is hurt Eunji but every time she sees or speaks to the blonde, Bomi is amazingly sweet and it causes Chorong's heart to swell with adoration. After auditioning for The Band's Visit, something Bomi had organised, she couldn't suppress her feelings anymore.

She didn't want to.

She needed to show Bomi how much she appreciated the gesture.

They say you regret the things you didn't do rather than the things you did do but what if it's a mixture of both? Chorong regrets the kiss because it was cheating but if she hadn't kissed Bomi, she thinks she'd have regretted that too.

When she was a child, her parents told her that cheaters never prosper. At the time, they were advocating honesty in board games. During a game of Chutes and Ladders, she had moved her token an extra two spaces in order to land on a ladder rather than a chute. Her parents had gently admonished her before telling her cheaters never prosper and moving her token to its rightful space.

She didn't cheat again during the game and ended up winning, a feat that proved her parents' point.

That same statement can extend, not only to cheating in academic activities or sports, but also to cheating in relationships.

By cheating on Eunji, she's only going to end up hurting her girlfriend and there's a high possibility that Bomi could become hurt too. For all she knows, she might have hurt Bomi already.

When she dated Changsub, she never had to deal with this problem. Her eyes never wandered during their two years relationship. Instead, because of his natural charisma, it was Changsub who received romantic attention and she watched as girls flirted with him and complimented him on his jokes.

She always thought that one day he would break up with her for somebody prettier, somebody ier but that day never came. Girls flirted with him but he would only ever flirt with Chorong.

Not that he could really flirt but Chorong cherished his feeble attempts.

She never expected it to be her who broke his heart.

Once she arrived in Seoul, they tried a long-distance relationship but after a couple of months, they realised their relationship just wasn't working anymore. In the first three months, they only saw each other once and rather than spend time re-connecting, they had argued. Chorong knew that a break up would hurt them both but it was what needed to happen.

It had been a cold January day when she first met Eunji. She had been walking through Yeouido Park when her eyes fell on a woman sitting on a bench which would normally be sheltered by the oak tree beside it. Her hood was up to protect herself from the cold and although Chorong couldn't make out what the woman looked like, she could tell the woman was engrossed in a sort of magazine.

For reasons she still doesn't understand, she found herself drawn to the stranger.

Completely lost in her thoughts about whether or not to approach the woman sat alone on the bench, Chorong had stopped paying attention to the ground and soon found herself falling backwards as she slipped on a patch of ice that had developed due to the icy January Seoul was currently enduring.

She landed hard on her bum and immediately flushed at the realisation that she had just fallen over in one of the busiest parks in Seoul. Some people walked past her, choosing to ignore the woman sat on the ground, some people stifled laughter whilst others simply stared at her. She was just about to stand up when an outstretched hand appeared in front of her. She accepted it gratefully, allowing the stranger to pull her up.

Once she was finally able to stand upright again, chocolate eyes met kind brown ones and Eunji was staring at her with a soft smile on her face. She had asked if she was okay and whether she'd hurt herself and when Chorong replied yes to the first question and no to the second, they soon slipped into a comfortable conversation. After talking to her for several minutes, Chorong sent a quick glance in the direction of the bench but the stranger who had momentarily captured her attention had disappeared.

Since that day, Eunji hasn't changed. She's always the first one to help somebody and she's always there for Chorong. She's perfect in every single way and Chorong hates herself for cheating on her girlfriend.

She's not even sure what her relationship with Bomi is at the moment, is she just a challenge to the blonde or does the blonde genuinely like her?

Part of her wants to think of Bomi as a bad friend that doesn't care about people's feelings because then it would be easier to stop thinking about her but somehow she highly doubts that's true in the slightest.

She casts another glance in Eunji's direction and her heart swells with love. There's no doubt that she loves Eunji but Bomi is causing her to doubt everything.

Not that she can put the entire blame on the blonde, it's her own fault as well.

Perhaps more than Bomi.

After all, she didn't have to kiss her.

If cheaters never prosper and she continues to cheat, she could end up losing somebody she loves, somebody who would do anything for her.

She's not in love with Bomi, she can't be. She's just blindly captivated by her.

This time when she scoffs, it's not due to her own hypocrisy rather her own denial.

That web of lies Chorong knew would appear is certainly expanding. Now, not only is she lying to her girlfriend, Bomi and her friends but also to herself. She's lying to herself when she says she doesn't have feelings for Bomi. They may not be as deep as love but they're certainly there.

"What are you thinking about?" Eunji's voice is tinged with sleep and confusion as she speaks.

Chorong glances at her girlfriend, unaware that she'd woken her up. "Nothing."

Eunji yawns briefly. "I can practically hear the cogs turning in your head, what's wrong?"

She releases a heavy sigh before shaking her head. "I just can't sleep and I started to think about the day we first met."

Eunji sends a sleepy smile in her direction before her eyes flutter shut, the tiredness overwhelming. "I'm really glad Bomi suggested we meet at Yeouido Park rather than her apartment otherwise we might never have met."

Chorong whips her head towards her girlfriend. "You were on your way to meet Bomi?"

Eunji nods her head against the pillow. "Yeah but we never actually met up because somebody slipped on the ice right in front of me and stole my heart."

Her girlfriend's response is mumbled and Chorong knows she's close to falling asleep. This evening when Chorong came round, Eunji had informed her that she'd had a long and exhausting day and all she wanted was to go to sleep before apologising that she was going to be poor company.

Chorong didn't mind because she didn't think she'd be much company either.

"Eunji?"

The lack of response coupled with the sound of Eunji's levelled breathing tells Chorong that her girlfriend has fallen asleep once more.

"You were meeting Bomi."

She breathes out the words quietly under her breath, trying to wrap her head around the revelation.

Surely that can't be a coincidence.