{Chapter 22: Family.{

Tears like today <3

Everything was slowly withering. That’s right.

Leaves are falling; everything seems brown and dead…just like all of us being human.

We are all caught up in the endless cycle of being human.

Just like how Robert Frost talks about the Spring Pools that is once so beautiful but dies easily; my life used to be like those beautiful, versatile and picturesque spring pools.

Spring comes and everything blooms; summer rushes in and it blossoms; autumn comes and everything falls; winter simply marks the end.

To be human, is to be caught up in such a tragic rushed cycle like that of the season.

Nothing lasts forever;

Seo Changbin was my spring.

∞

Hyunjin walked with Hani as she sighed for the thousandth time

“You think its fine to just come and have dinner like that?” Hani asked in an unsure tone as Hyunjin pushed her to the lift

“Just follow me” he chuckled as Hani looked at the lift go up and up

“Why haven’t you been seeing Changbin?” Hyunjin asked, his hands inside his pocket

“Em?” Hani snapped out from her trance

“Aniya, nothing” Hyunjin smiled as Hani traced Changbin’s name on the wall of the lift.

“Do you think he’ll ever want to see me again?” Hani asked staring blankly as Hyunjin looked at her

“…he will” he smiled looking down as the lift opened

“We’re here” Hani smiled getting off.

“Welcome to Hyunjin’s home!” Hyunjin said leading Hani the way, pushing her from behind.

“Eomma, I’m home” Hyunjin called as Hani smiled looking at the warm cozy apartment

“Oh, you’re home?” his mom said cheerfully as she set the table

“Oh..annyeonghasaeyo eommo-nim” Hani bowed politely

“Oh, you must be Hani?” his mom asked, warmly

“a-ah, n-neh…have we met before?” Hani asked as Hyunjin’s mom shook her head

“Jin talks about you all the time. You’re the only girl—”

“Eomma, is dinner ready? I’m so hungry” Hyunjin said dragging Hani away as she awkwardly bowed at his mom, making the elder chuckle.

LATER:

Hani sat with Hyunjin’s mom and him as the mom figure warmly took out the food for them to eat

“Appaa?” Hyunjin asked taking the chopsticks and handing it to Hani as he busily talked with his mom

“He’s working overtime again, aigoo…I feel bad that both of you has to work so hard” Hyunjin’s mom said as Hani smiled, looking at the mother-son duo.

“Here, eat up a lot okay, my daughter” Hyunjin’s mom said placing a slice of meat on her plate

“It’s Hyunjin’s favorite” she smiled as Hani nodded smiling

“Khamsanmidah, I will enjoy it” Hani smiled nodding
“And the kids? Do you get along with them?” his mom asked as Hani modded

“Em-em…they’re all so lovely” Hani smiled awkwardy

“Eomma! You’re making her feel awkward! Let her eat in peace” Hyunjin said as his mom pinhed his cheek

“Aigoo”

“A-ahhh that hurts!”

So this is how family feels like.

Having to eat together, asking how the day was…just things of which answers you know, but still ask.

Making sure if you’ve been good.

Having someone to call ‘appa’ and ’eomma’.

And to be honest, I was jealous of Hyunjin, he had such an amazing family – a family that not only cherished their own, but also cherished others as their own.

I was ashamed and hurt.

When was the last time I ate with my dad?

When was the last time I called someone “eomma”?

***

Hani looked at Hyunjin sleeping peacefully in his bed – after a long talk about how he trained and how he’d have trouble with his pronunciation – Guess he was really tired.

Hani pushed the bangs away from his face as she caressed his cheek

“Stay strong Hyunjin-ah, even if I’m not around” she smiled as she looked at him sleeping peacefully

“Good night” she smiled kissing his cheek, before exiting the room.

“Is he asleep?” his mom asked from the kitchen, picking out the peas from their pods.

“Ah, neh eommo-nim. Can I help you with that?” she asked, hurriedly rushing over and sitting next to her as they worked together.

“Are you in the same class as Hyunjin?”

“A-Aniyo eommo-nim, I am a senior by one year” Hani said leisurely enjoying the time.

“Ahh…do you have any brothers or sisters?” she asked warmly

“Aniyo…I am the only daughter. Eomma passed away from an illness when I was 12, and appa is always busy with work so it often gets lonely. I’m really envious of you guys” Hani smiled 

“Oh, that’s so unfortunate…do you want to talk to me?”

“…You see, growing up without a mother can be really hard especially for girls…we often have problems we really want to talk about but it gets frustrating when there’s no one…right?” his mom smiled as Hani looked at her

“Things must have been really hard for you, didn’t it, Hani?” his mom asked as Hani quickly turned away, not wanting to cry

“I’m obviously a bad daughter” she said as she tried to blink her tears away

“Appa is the only one I have…and I fought with him and shouted at him. He must have been really hurt right?” Hani asked as Hyunjin’s mom pulled her closer to Hani’s seat

“Ani, not at all. It’s okay to throw tantrums with your parents once in a while…you see, parents tend to be so stubborn with their children even when it’s wrong and those times you need to throw a fit to tell them that you are right…”

“…but whatever they do, they think for the best for you” Hyunjin's mother smiled as Hani nodded

“…So this is what family really feels like” Hani smiled as a tear escaped her eye

“Uljima, my daughter. You must have had it hard didn’t you?” his mom asked warmly, hugging her

“Things must really have been hard and you must have been so lonely…” Hyunjin’s mom comforted her as she patted her back

“Whenever…whenever you want someone to run to…remember you have me and everyone in this family okay?” she asked as Hani nodded, crying

“Geumawo… eomma” Hani rubbed her tears away, smiling.

A few days later:

Hani sat alone in the practice rooms as she waited for him. The door slowly opened welcoming a guy with a bright smile

“Oh, annyeonghasaeyo…I am Minho” the guy bowed politely as Hani smiled bowing back

“I am Hani” she said bowing a bit.

“Why did you want to meet me?” Minho asked as he sat with Hani inside the room

“I know we haven’t met before but I am close with the kids so I just wanted to meet you once before I leave” Hani smiled as Minho looked at her

“Ah…neh” the confused kid answered

“I heard you all trained to debut as 9 members and I even heard about Felix being eliminated…I just wanted to ask you something, Minho-sshi” Hani said as Minho nodded

“…The boys…they’re like a family to you right?” Hani asked as Minho nodding, his smile undeniable

“They’re the closest family to me, Hani-sshi. I don’t know how’ll I’ll cope with them not being with me when I need them, but I just wish them the best. If not me, at least they should be able to debut and I’ll support them in that…that what a family does” Minho answered playing with his fingers

“You see… Sometimes the reason good things never happen to you may be because you are the good waiting to be happened in someone’s life.” the optimistic kid answered as Hani paused

“…family” Hani smiled as Minho nodded

“Neh. Though our dreams to be together are shattered, I still believe in a miracle” Minho said as Hani nodded

“Thank you so much for you time today, Minho-sshi. I hope the miracle comes to you soon” Hani smiled standing up as the vocalist-turned-rapper stood up nodding as he did a small bow

“Thank you for meeting me and talking to me about this. I will surely remember you” Minho smiled bowing down as Hani smiled bowing back.

Walking away from that from that practice room, his words emain fixed in my mind and that was the only thing that taunted me for the rest of the day…

--“Sometimes the reason good things never happen to you may be because you are the good waiting to be happened in someone’s life”