WARNING OF SCRAMBLED GRAMMAR AND SOME BORING WORDS(?) MAYBE?

I'm hasting to finish this before Saturday..... which is tomorrow.....

You can't expect happiness because.... life k? ^^

 

 

 

 

Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal. Richard Puz   How trivial it is the thought of dead. The gloom of darkness is shining with blinding light of despair yet with a desperate plea of salvation from the pain that has no cure other than the inevitable. As if walking on thorn paths with no ends, it does feel like that. Except that the pain isn’t much physical if wanted too, it gnawing on the inside; taking any sanity down with it.   Chanwoo feels exactly like that. It’s not the end of the world but it does have feeling such as it. As he sits staring into nothingness from the edge of his bed, the cold floor numbing his buttocks’ sensation and back pained with prolong sitting and standing during the funeral that has just over 2 hours ago. The eye bags under his eyes has yet be the worst and his buttoned up white shirt has thousands wrinkles on them. But he is too tired to care. Too exhausted with his looks in the long mirror staring at him though he does cringe watching his zombie-like state.   He has no recognition of time. Perhaps it has been 2 hours, or 3 hours. He’s lost. His phone’s battery has long out and his watch whereabouts is long forgotten. He only stares, nothing in mind and soul. Soulless.   Countless of knocks are heard from behind his door. Voices softly calling his name but he has no urge to answer them. It also seems like the members understood him well for when they received no answer, the knocks are gone. Then more knocks come asking for him if he’s hungry. Chanwoo gives no answer, and they leave him to it. Hours passed until he lost track of the world. Chanwoo finally makes a movement. His joints cracking all over the body as he stands up. Literally throwing himself on the bed, he lets the sleep conquers his being.   Closed eyes, heart not beating, but a living love. Avis Corea     Soft pats on his left shoulder awakes him from deep slumber. Groggily opening his eyes, he sees Yunhyeong inside his room. The older is sitting by his bed, no more wearing black suit from the funeral earlier. He has changed into his usual clothes he wears at home looking very comfortable. Though Chanwoo can see the troubled glints in his eyes through the darkness of the room. He knows he should feel bad for making Yunhyeong worried about him. Yet, he opts not to feel it. Too numb to even have feelings.   Yunhyeong gives him a small smile as Chanwoo sits up. “Come and eat. Dinner’s ready.” The mention of dinner takes him slightly aback. It’s night already? How long has he been sleeping? Confined to his room from the outside world? He is amazed that Jinhwan hyung hasn’t dragged him out from the room yet. For that’s usually what he would do. They must have been giving him time for himself to calm down. Very long time.   “I’m not hungry, hyung.” Chanwoo mutters. His voice hoarse as if he has sung 10 songs in a row. He feels how sticky his body is yet bath is the last in his mind. He just wants to sleep. Yunhyeong’s soften face a minute ago changed into a worried one. Disapproval enlightens his orbs. “Come on. You haven’t eaten much for the day. You only took a small bite of food during the funeral. You must be starving.” He tries to coax the younger but Chanwoo won’t budge. He has no appetite despite having empty stomach.   “I’m fine.” He said. “I just want to sleep.” Yunhyeong has no idea what to say. He wants to say more but Chanwoo’s face, though maybe the maknae doesn’t mean to show it, he could read how his expression screaming please leave me alone. Let me be sad alone. It breaks Yunhyeong’s heart. He’s getting much worried yet having no intention to push it more. Sending small smile and an encouraging pat to his shoulder, Yunhyeong leave Chanwoo alone but not without leaving some foods on his table minutes later.   Darkness meets him again and Chanwoo welcomes them. Ironically, nights are when the pained and tormented souls of men let out a cry reminiscing their sad live. Chanwoo does that exactly. Tears slipped his eyes as he closes them forcing sleep onto him. He wishes for his heart to be healed.       Yunhyeong sighs in defeat. As he enters the kitchen, 5 pairs of eyes are staring hole at him demanding answers. He gives them a shake of head. Sighs escaped them. Taking a seat beside Donghyuk by the dining table, Yunhyeong feels his lips quivering. “It hasn’t even been 24 hours but I feel like I can’t watch him any longer.” He voices out, tears burning at his eyelids. Donghyuk draws comforting circles on his back as reassurance. Rubbing his temple in frustration, Yunhyeong looks so defeated.   “I.…have never seen this coming.” Uttered June who has his eyes staring at the fruit bowl on the table. His face shows equal pain like the others. “Yeah, no one expects this to happen so sudden. Poor her parents. It must have been hard for them.” Bobby says as he runs his hand on his messy purple hair. His eyes travel to the leader sitting before him. Looking at distance with no exact tangles to the world. He calls for the leader’s name, catching the latter’s attention. Hanbin looks so lost when his eyes met Bobby’s. “Are you alright?”   Hanbin diverts his eyes down. Hesitation glistening in his orbs. A moment before his head is down, Bobby catches a glimpse of it. Opening and closing his mouth like a dying fish, the leader speaks up, “I’m okay. I’m just worried about him.” Hanbin’s words sound heavy like his feelings. His tired face shows concern that can’t be unseen.   “Why don’t you try to talk with him, hyung? Maybe he’ll come out.” Donghyuk voices out, every eyes on him. Jinhwan is the one breaking the silence with his sigh. This one less heavy yet very burdened. “Are you okay with that, Hanbin-ah?”   “Well, what if he doesn’t want to talk with me?” Spats the leader. Desperation in his tone of voice. Yunhyeong eyed him in silent before he speaks. “For now maybe. But for tomorrow we’re not sure. Let’s just leave him for tonight. I’ve left food already in his room. He’ll surely fill his stomach and not passing out in hunger at least.” Said the second oldest and all of them have no choice but to agree with him. Maybe it’s the best to leave the younger alone for the moment. As one by one the members leave the kitchen, Hanbin who’s still sitting by the table couldn’t get his head off from the maknae.   If I can’t turn things around
I know one way would be to accept it but I’m standing here
I’m still standing here       He enters the room that night. Eyes searching for a lump of body whilst adjusting to the darkness. He finds him sleeping soundly on the bed as he approaches. Hanbin watches the maknae’s face while he’s sleeping. His skin glowing in the dark as his eyes trailing each aspect of his perfect features. He lets his hand touch the younger’s skin, the contact makes him shiver. Then he feels it on the skin. A sticky and dried tears smearing his face. It makes Hanbin’s heart falls. He has been crying while sleeping.   He must be in deep of slumber till Hanbin’s touch couldn’t even wake Ch