I watch my wife look from my tablet to our son.

She is currently learning how to change the diaper on the internet.

Honestly. . . I feel sorry for her.

Unlike any other new mothers, she doesn’t have a mother who could guide and teach her. For the past weeks that Yohan arrived home with us, we’ve been only learning through the internet and child-rearing books that I bought for her. I look away and rub my eyes before stepping in. “Have you mastered it?” I ask which made her turn. “Just a bit more. It’s not really that hard but you know. . . I still need to perfect it, especially the cleaning part.” She tells.

I crawl to the bed and stop just before my son who automatically smiles seeing my face right on top of his. “Oh?~ Appa? Is it Appa?” Iseul coos and I lean down to kiss Yohan’s lips. “Honey, I think I can handle it already. If you want you can go back to work again.” My wife then tells. I lie down in sideways and pat Yohan’s chest gently. “It’s alright. I have two more weeks from the leave I asked for anyway. Might as well use it.” I answer and just stare at Yohan, simply admiring him.

“All done~ my baby is fresh and clean.” Iseul bends down and kisses Yohan’s tummy in a ticklish way which created a weird sound. The baby giggled hard especially when Iseul goes higher and their faces met. “Wah~ aigoo, so cute my baby.” She glances at me and winks. “Why so silent, anything wrong?” She asks and lifts Yohan to her arms and begins patting the baby’s back.

“No, nothing’s wrong.” I lie down completely and put my hands over my head. I simply watch the two interact.  “Then why so quiet?” She asks and we made eye-contact. I still shake my head. To be honest, I don’t even know myself of why I can’t seem to say anything. “If you’re tired, go have some nap. You didn’t last night.” She tells and pats my chest flat. I pull myself up to sit and took Yohan from her. “You didn’t sleep last night. I slept a bit when you were in the bathroom. I’ll take him from here.” I said and got off the bed.

“Are you sure?” She asks in concern. “Yes, of course. Yohan seems very awake right now. I’ll spend a little time with him, you go sleep.” I tell and walk to the door. “But the dinner, I still need to cook.” She tells. “No, sleep first. When you wake up, I’ll just buy food outside. Don’t cook anymore.” I said lastly before stepping out of the room.

“We’re gonna go out, Yohan-ah.” I speak softly as I walk to the living room. I gently sit down the chair and placed my son on my lap while I have my palm over her neck and head for support. I smile down to him when he looked. “I heard Eomma talking to the phone. . . her Appa’s wife is taking this house under her name but don’t tell Eomma that Appa knows okay? And anyways. . . you have to have your own room in the future. This house only has one. So it’s okay. . .” I speak as I have no one to talk to about this thing I just found out.

Iseul hasn’t told me yet.

And I don’t want to rush her.

She might be embarrassed and sad about it.

This condominium is still under her father’s name and it would be too troublesome for Iseul if she would still fight for this place. She will get exposed and financially, it will be hard too. Mrs. Kang has a lot of power and I know Iseul agreed to it. I don’t want to embarrass her too by saying that I know she’s being kicked out by the legal wife of her father, it would be too much for her.

Instead, I began finding a new place.

“We will find a bigger house so you could play around when you begin walking and running. But don’t run too much, okay? Eomma will get tired.” I continue speaking and I know he doesn’t understand a thing but I still continued. I also read that through speaking to your child a lot, he can develop his language even faster than normal. “Especially when Appa goes back to work. Appa is a professor, very smart professor so I am always busy. Arrachi?” I ask and he only responds with a cute giggle.

His short and plum arms move up reaching for my face so I lean closer and let him touch me.

“Appa is very handsome. Ne?” I hear Iseul’s voice which made me look up. She was standing by the door frame of our bedroom. “Yah, why are you still awake?” I ask and sigh. “It’s five in the afternoon, why are you ruing the normal sleeping pattern. Eyy, seriously. I won’t be able to sleep later if I sleep now.” She answers back before walking our way. She sits beside me and rests her head on my shoulder. Both of us simply admired Yohan’s face.

“Aigoo, he really got your features. So unfair.” Iseul muffles and wipes Yohan’s drool with her thumb. I just smile in response and place my head on hers. “Kyungsoo, I want Yohan to have a baby room too. What do we do? I mean. . . I know I said I want to keep this place in memory of my father but wouldn’t it be unfair for Yohan if he doesn’t get his own place to rest, to play, to. . . you know stuffs like that. I jus—“We can move. It’s not that hard.” I cut her off.

I don’t want to waste her effort to make excuses anymore.

And anyway, her excuse is true as well.

I’ll just let her off. Not because we’re married means we can’t have our own prides anymore.

She still has hers, I have mine.

“Really? Won’t it be