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WARNING -> some homophobic language. Could offend. You have been warned.

//Yixing//

- After Minseok left home -

Coming up to Minseok's house, it's strangely quiet. The whole street is quiet actually, not just Minseok's house, and it's quite off putting. Usually there's some kids yelling and when I approach Minseok's house I can usually hear some music playing from Minseok's window. 
But today I can't.
Squinting against the glare of the morning sun, I knock quietly on the front door. It echoes hollowly, and I bounce on the balls of my feet happily in anticipation of seeing Minseok. 
The key makes a click in the lock and Minseok's mom opens it slowly. The first thing I notice is that she looks tired - I mean, she always looks kinda tired, but today she looks on the verge of falling asleep on her feet. She blinks slowly, registering me. "Oh. Hello, Yixing." she murmurs. 
"Hello, Minhee." I greet her brightly. "Can I come in?" 
She looks behind her into the dark hallway tentatively, fingernails tapping gently on the door. "Uh. It's probably best if you don't, not today." She says quietly, not quite meeting my eyes as she turns round again. Strangely, the sky clouds over and in the distance, I hear a rumble of thunder. 
I scratch my head in confusion. "Why? Is Minseok ill?" I ask, immediately getting worried. "I'll look after him if he is." I offer. 
Minhee looks pained. "N-no. It's... it's not that." 
"What is it then?" I say desperately. I shift my weight from one foot to the other, my mind spiralling over situations Minseok could've gotten himself into. Before she can reply, I hear movement behind Minhee, and suddenly the door is wrenched open wider by a very red Mr Kim. Minhee stumbles as he does so, and I clench my fist.
"Minseok isn't here." he snaps. Minhee stares blankly past me as a single tear streams down her cheek, and Mr Kim grunts and pushes her back into the house quickly. 
"What?" My mouth hangs open. Where else could he be? More like where did he go without telling me? He always tells me where he's going. Even if it's just a quick message saying hey, I'm going to the shop. 
Mr Kim rolls his eyes. "For gods sake. Didn't he tell you? I'm surprised, you two were practically joined at the hip. He's gone. Forever. And he's not coming back." Mr Kim says angrily, attempting to slam the door in my face. 
Instead, I hold the door with my arm, desperation making my attempt successful. "You can't just leave me with that! What the happened? What did you do?!" I yell, forcing myself inside and past Mr Kim's huge stature. 
Minhee grabs my arm protectively and whispers in my ear. "He came out to us. He got kicked out. I'm so scared, Yixing." she says, her eyes glassy and her grip deathly tight on my arm. I go rigid with shock, because as much as I knew Mr Kim wasn't going to be entirely accepting of Minseok's uality, I didn't think he'd go this far.
I turn to Mr Kim, who looks sickeningly defiant with his arms folded. "Care to explain yourself?" I attempt to sound threatening, but really I do understand why Minhee is scared - Mr Kim is a really terrifying man at times.
"What I'd like to know is why you're not avoiding him either. It's disgusting, you know? I won't have him in my house. I didn't raise him to become one of those people." Mr Kim sniffs. 
Without thinking, my hand shoots out and slaps Mr Kim hard across the face. The sound resonates throughout the hall, and Minhee flinches next to me at the stinging sound. Mr Kim looks thunderous, a red mark in the shape of my hand forming on the side of his face. 
"You - you - you ! How the can you be so damn shallow to raise a kid for 18 years and then just cut them off and kick them out with no regrets simply because the person he falls in love with won't wear a dress at the wedding?" I stare at him, chest rising and falling heavily. I'm so angry at him - I can't even express it. I just - I don't understand how his mind works. It makes me want to scream.
Mr Kim stares at me, and sighs. "Please leave." he asks, quietly but firmly.
"No," I hiss. "Not until you tell me why you think it's civil behaviour to kick a child out and leave him with nothing simply because of that." I'm trying not to get emotional - but I can feel Minhee quivering next to me and it's becoming really, really, hard to stay cold.
"It appears we have different outlooks on what is acceptable and I'm sorry but we're going to have to agree to disagree. I don't care to explain it to you when you're so clearly unstable and blinded by your infatuation with Minseok." he says, and it's like he just returned the slap I gave him earlier. A tear trickles from my eye - I can't believe he knows I love Minseok, and I can't believe he would bring it up when it's so clearly irrelevant. 
"How is his love different to yours? How? Tell me that." I say with tears running down my cheeks, ignoring his comments. I'm trying not to shout again. I'm really trying.
"It's wrong. There's a reason it was illegal, you know." 
"Yeah, well there's a reason it's legal now." I snap, and I decide I've had enough. I can't be here anymore. I don't care if I lost that battle - he's so shallow and blind that it's actually pointless trying. 
I yank on the door handle, wrenching it open and slamming it behind me. Rain is pouring outside now - how ironic, I think to myself. With no care for how soaking I'll get, I wander aimlessly down the path and sit with my back against the path. Rain pounds against my head, droplets running down my face. I cry silently, mostly out of infuriation, and the tears mix with the rain and I can faintly taste their saltiness on my lips. My hair sticks to my forehead, and as cars drive past, splashing my shoes with dirty water, my eyes blink slowly, losing focus. 
Through my blurry vision and the sheets of rain, I see another pair of feet in front of me. My eyebrows crease, and I squint upwards, trying to see who it is.
"Yixing?" a familiar voice says. 
"Ju - Junmyeon?" I stutter, and suddenly the rain over me stops as he comes closer and shelters me with his umbrella. 
"Yixing, what are you doing?" Junmyeon asks, concern written all over his face. 
Slowly, and shakily, I get to my feet. Junmyeon follows my action, keeping the umbrella over my head so I stay dry.
"He's - he's gone, Junmyeon." I choke, falling forwards and burying my face in his shoulder. 
He rubs my back comfortingly, not seeming to mind how wet I'm making him. Sobs rack my body, and my body jolts every time I try to hold it back. 
"I know, Yixing, I know." he murmurs in my ear, and my fingers twist in his jumper. 
"When was h-he gonna tell me?" 
"I don't know. He didn't tell me where he went either," he whispers, and it strangely makes me feel slightly better that I wasn't the only one he didn't tell. "Come on, let's get you out of the rain, shall we?" Junmyeon says, and he keeps an arm around me as he walks me to his car.
I wipe my eyes.
Why, Minseok? Why?

-  

"Myeonnie, come here and listen to this, will you?" I call, leaning back in my spinny chair and spinning round once. Junmyeon comes into the room shortly, holding a large bundle of washing. He picks a pair of my underwear off my floor as he comes over, looking at my screen.
"Go on, then, play it." he says, perching on my bed. 
I press play and the music starts playing out of my speakers quietly. It's the first time I've composed something like this - it's more melodic, more soft, with more piano and less electric guitar. 
Junmyeon sways along slowly to the music, his eyes closed, smiling gently. "It's good," he compliments when it's finished, despite the ending being quite abrupt and rushed. "Really good. I love it." 
"Thanks," I say, cheeks rosy. He sounds so genuine. "The ending isn't done, and I haven't recorded the vocals yet, but I think I'm happy with it." 
Junmyeon nods. "Have you written any lyrics?" 
"Yeah." I hand him several scribbly pieces of paper, covered in unorganised lyrics and ideas. Junmyeon frowns, eyes flicking over the words quickly, trying to make sense of my hasty thoughts. 
Junmyeon smiles. "They're beautiful. Really heartfelt. I think you've hit the nail o the head here, Xing." he says softly.
I smile. "I think so, too." 
"Minseok will love it." Junmyeon winks, and pats my cheek fondly before grabbing a stray pair of dirty socks and closing the door behind him on his way out. 
I sigh. "I just wish he would love me." I murmur sadly, before turning back to the computer and preparing to record my voice.

- When Junmyeon went to England -

I tap my fingers on my desk anxiously. I've had skype open for the past half an hour, waiting and waiting for Minseok to come online. I know Junmyeon is at his house - that sounds so foreign, because I still feel like that means his house here, in America - and so I'm waiting for Minseok to come online. Junmyeon sent me a message about an hour ago, so it shouldn't be long now. Hypothetically, anyway.
Restless, I go to the kitchen and switch the kettle on, figuring a cup of hot chocolate will calm me down. The sound of the kettle boiling seems deafening against the silence of Junmyeon's - well, mine too - apartment. I'm still not used to not being able to hear Junmyeon humming to himself as he goes about his daily chores, or the sound of the TV in the background as I'm on my laptop in the evening. I'm getting too attached to him, it's weird. He even ruffles my hair affectionately when I first blunder my way into the kitchen in the morning for coffee. 
The sound of my phone receiving a message makes me jump so much the hot chocolate in the cup I'm holding splashes everywhere, all over my hand, face, and the floor. I snatch m