“I can’t choose to visit a friend?” Namjoo asked quite cheerily, still up to playing with him.

 Tao flatly stared at her, not in the mood for her antics. He had least expected her to show up again after last time. He’d assumed she had figured out how to deal with the mess she’d gotten herself into…responsibly.

“Fine.” She dropped the cheery tone. “Can’t I have a day where I don’t have to be Choonhee? Can you open the door? These heels are killing my feet.”

His eyes dove down toward her feet then walking forward, unlocked his door, and let her in. Despite the unamusement that she had come yet again, he couldn’t let it go with how much like Choonhee she looked. As freaky as it was, he almost thought the dead friend had resurrected.

Last week after dropping her off at home he’d gone back to Angel House to look around. After coming across numerous assistants he was finally led to Yoo Hasun, who became Co-Director of the orphanage a few years ago when the previous one retired. She was scrawny and every bit of a nagging grandmother who but loved her children. Her aged appearance and warm aura made Tao think of a grandma, who chased after her grandchildren to force them to eat her freshly baked cookies. 

The gray haired woman had smiled at him and right after introducing himself asked about Namjoo. It turned out she had told the truth, to his amazement. This girl right in front of him, peering around his trailer home curiously had been honest with him. And that meant one real thing, Choonhee was really dead.

Tao watched her look around in awe at his simple but tiny place. It was an open roomed kind of place, a straight short hallway that led to the living room, the bedroom at the end, and the bathroom alongside it. He didn’t think it was an impressive place, but he was alone and it didn’t matter. The place had been cheap and negotiating for it hadn’t been difficult as the owner was old and short on life.

Everything he owned was what the owner had left behind; other things were from thrift stores – the cheapest of its kind, because that was him, cheap and simple. The yellow flowery wallpaper were starting to grow with mold but there wasn’t anything he could do with it yet. To fight off the age rotting smell of the home he planted dozens of air fresheners around. Tao was proud to see that it was working since Namjoo didn’t seem to be detecting anything of a strange scent.

“Oh,” she said, “for you.” That was when he noticed the bag in her hand. Setting it onto the table she went on to say, “I didn’t know what to get you. I never bought a gift for anyone before. You should realize how lucky you are.”

Grabbing the bag he glanced inside to see some packs of candy, which he recognized were from the store nearby.

Glancing up at her he asked, “What is this?”

“Gifts…for you. It’s basic manners not to visit without bringing something. And I visited you, so I brought you something.”

Tao scoffed in utter disbelief, “You’re not kidding.”

“What? If you don’t like it I’ll take it,” she reached for the back but he quickly shoved it against the wall.

“And it’s basic manners not to take back a useless gift you brought.” He muttered. “What are you doing here?”

Inviting herself to the single chair at the table she twisted around in her chair to watch him look through his fridge, “You’re not going to offer me a drink? Usually people offer each other drinks when someone visits.”

Irate, Tao turned around to look at her with a tense frown. “Look you…”

“You can call me Namjoo,” she offered and added a cunning smile.

He sighed, irritated because he felt gross under layers of sweat and oil but she was here. “You…”

“Do you work outside or something? What’s all that black stuff on your arms, oh, and you have some on your face,” she pointed to her face to tell him where exactly they were on his.

Tao felt his brow twitch. The muscles on his face pulled his cheeks back, made his lips stiff. “What do you want? Why are you here?”

She shrugged, “Geez, you’re so easily irritated. I just said a few things and you can’t even try to hide it from showing on your face. You sound nice but your expressions…” she made a face, shook her head, pulled her brows together, and upturned her lips. She even took to waving her hand in front of her, as if to tell him how bad his expression was.

“You know what…I don’t think right now…”

“You don’t have to mind me.” Namjoo cut him off. “Go ahead and do what you want to do.” She waved him off, as if this was her home.

This girl…this twin of Choonhee’s was far too different from the formal, considerate woman he had befriended. She seemed as if she came from another planet, an unworldly planet in space. Namjoo was two worlds apart from what Choonhee had been. How were they so different, but so alike in appearance?

Tao felt mind blown, offended with what they were doing to him. He couldn’t believe it, found it hard to believe, but she was right in front of his eyes.

Sighing deeply he told her, “If I find out that you touched anything when I come back, I’m warning you that you’ll see the light of day faster than anything you’ve ever experienced.”

Namjoo snorted at his warning as he turned to walk away.  

As expected, a shower helped freshen his mind. As the water drizzled down on him endlessly he found his mind clear. Suddenly, he wondered when the sister became Choonhee. After Choonhee collapsed and stopped contacting him? When he called for her at the gates?

Slowly, it occurred to him then that Choonhee had been hesitant to talk with him. Had it been Namjoo then? Why had they done that to Choonhee without telling him?

“Why?!” he shouted and slammed the wall with his palm.

Calmly, the water continued drizzling over him like a rainstorm. The score of drops hammered against the floor noisily, imitating the storm on a vicious warring day.

He only met those guys a few times and whenever he did, he never saw anything good in them. What was the feeling to describe it? The way they looked at him with their demeaning eyes while wearing a smile had been painfully obvious to him that they detested him being around Choonhee, because he wasn’t from the same class and because he let her see the real world through his eyes. She had been good and kind, patient and naïve but she couldn’t see how intentional they were; how small their minds really are, and that they only wanted to keep her bound to them.

Or had she?

He wasn’t sure anymore. Had Choonhee played dumb because she was pregnant? Did she do it to keep herself safe in their crude world? How much had she kept from him, putting on one face and then another?! She excused their behavior, their remarks about him made in front of him but she still came back to be his friend.

It was confusing. He always knew Choonhee was intelligent from the way she negotiated with his loansharks to keep them off his back. Her words had been powerful and threatening, even when she sounded utmost calm, like talking to a friend. She had skills and ability. She could have done anything without telling anyone and it could have cost her her life, not just because of the baby.

So why hadn’t Choonhee’s death been known, but covered?

If he wanted to find the truth behind Choonhee’s death he’d have to accept and get closer to the identical twin who made him nauseous by just looking at her, the spitting image of her sister. A part of him wanted to rage about it, because he wanted nothing more with Choonhee’s people. It was all but the truth that he had no choice.

Choonhee had been important to him.

\\\\\

She had definitely made the right decision to come see Tao. Namjoo felt so much more like herself and it felt so good. Tao’s home was nice and tidy, exactly her style. She was envious of him to be able to own his own place. It had always been her dream to own her own home without having to share space with strangers or keep warm by a fire lit trash bin at night.

Smiling, she walked around curiously looking through some magazine catalogs he owned and old newspapers he had piled up on his table. Namjoo even took to sitting down on his secondhand couch, testing it for comfort, before spreading hers arms out in satisfaction. Turning to stare at his tiny TV she imagined herself stiting here on a quiet evening, having some beer and chips while watching a gag show. It was the perfect scenario she always wanted to live.

Grinning again, happy that she didn’t have to be at the company or with Kai or Sehun or Hayoung she breathed a long sigh of relief. Now she felt more like herself. This was just so right she didn’t want to go back to Choonhee’s manor.

As soon as the thought came it left. She was suddenly perked by something sticking out of the corner behind the TV. Cautious, she turned to peer down her left and could still hear the shower running. She didn’t want to get caught digging through Tao’s stuff. The last thing she wanted was to leave a bad impression on him that she was a liar or a thief, which none she had really been.

Curious, she stood and started toward the TV. Extending her arm out she grabbed the white envelope taking notice of how aged it was with deep lines, telling her of how it had been opened numerous times. Flipping the cover open she noticed a few pictures inside and pulled them out.

Surprise flickered through her upon seeing her own face stare back at her cheerily. Namjoo quickly panicked when the shower went off and she could hear Tao moving around inside the bathroom. Stuffing the picture into the envelope she stuffed it behind the TV and headed for the kitchen plopping into the seat she’d earlier been in. her lips out of anxiety she quickly fixed her hair and dropped her hands onto her lap to look normal. She sighed in relief when Tao finally opened the door, walked out, and glanced her way to make sure she wasn’t messing around.

“You’re done?” Namjoo grinned with a slight wave. “You’re surprised, right? That I didn’t dig around?”

He narrowed his eyes at her before turning to go into his bedroom to put his work clothes away. Breathing another sigh of relief Namjoo shook her head to assure herself she was alright. For a second she’d thought her anxiousness with pretending to be Choonhee was starting to wear off, only it was starting to creep back under her skin now that she was herself. What the hell…

“Lets start this again,” he said walking toward her with damp hair and in casual street wear, “why are you here again?”

“Because,” she answered then she paused while trying to find her reason. Actually, she had none. She’d just come her on impulse. “There’s no reason. I just had nowhere to go after taking a day off from work.”

Tao frowned at her, as if trying to decide whether she was speaking the truth or not. “Are you hungry?”

“I had some soup…” Namjoo jumped to her feet, “now that you say it, I am a little hungry.”

She laughed while thinking if she told him she already ate she wouldn’t get to eat again, and who would avoid food when it was available?

“I came without having breakfast or lunch,” she lied. “Although I am quite used to starving for a period of time, but recently…”

“Lets go,” cutting her off this time he started toward the door. Swiveling on her heels she happily followed, like a bird her mother.

\\\\\

The mart they arrived at was within a walking distance, booming with customers all of whom were dressed in clothes sported by nearby stores. Namjoo immediately became self-conscious of her appearance the second they entered. Many shoppers shot an eye her way, galling over her outfit and probably, she thought, why she was there.

One thing she’d learned after entering Choonhee’s world was that she hated being misunderstood and finding it pathetic and impossible to explain herself. Trying to avoid their eyes stripping her free she stuck close to Tao and followed him after he grabbed a cart, wondering if he noticed what she noticed.

“Can you cook?” he asked.

“Huh?” she turned to look at him. “Me?”

“Who else am I asking?”

Rolls of embarrassed laughter escaped . She squeaked, “Not really.”

He stopped and turned to look at her, appearing like he was going to make some kind of crude comment. Shaking his head he continued to push the cart.

Hurriedly shuffling after him she answered, “I don’t cook. I’ve never touched a stove before. Why? Were you thinking about having me cook? I don’t believe a woman needs to cook for a man, her place shouldn’t be in the kitchen. Talking about that, I feel quite bad for Auntie Shin. Do you know her? She’s the cooking maid in the house, the only one I really see. She’s always working alone and sometimes we just sit there without helping, it makes me feel bad. I wonder how much she gets paid.”

A breath loudly caught in Tao’s throat, sounding almost like a ed hiss. Abruptly stopping he turned to stare at her. Surprised, she glanced at him, wondering what was wrong.

“You…do you always talk so much?” he asked, sounding irritated just like earlier.

Guiltily smiling, Namjoo shrugged. “I don’t know. I’ve always had a free mouth though, that’s what I was told but I haven’t been able to do it lately. Suddenly today, I feel like talking a lot. Why? Does it bother you?”

Exhaling deeply Tao bit his lower lip and rolled his eyes before continuing to push the cart.

“So,” Namjoo began again, unable to keep her curiosity imprisoned, “tell me about Choonhee. Did she often come here with you? I guess not? The owner of the fish restaurant shop didn’t seem to recognize me when I stopped in earlier…”

Quickly catching herself she quieted; worried that Tao wouldn’t off her food if he knew she already ate. Biting onto her nails she glanced up at him. Luckily, he didn’t seem to notice or rather yet, care.  

“No. We went to the places she wanted to go,” Tao answered without even looking at her. “They were places her friends didn’t like going, so I went with her.”

“Friends?” Namjoo repeated. “You mean Sehun, Kai, and Hayoung?”

“Duh.” He turned around the corner without warning and Namjoo barely continued walking straight forward without him.

“She was close to them, I suppose,” Namjoo commented, “did she ever tell you about them?”

Pausing by the fresh vegetable section she watched him grab a plastic bag and start going through the broccolis on display.

“What are you doing?”

“Looking for the decent ones.” He replied nonchalantly then stopped and turned to look at her. “Don’t tell me you’ve never been in a store before.”

“Well…I have,” Namjoo glanced up at the light as she went through her memory, “but I never bought anything.” Then looking at him with face scrunched as if to get her point across, “You know, I never really had money.”  

“Right.”

“So I was saying,” Namjoo went on then paused and cocked her head, “what was I saying?”

Heaving a sigh he returned to picking up one broccoli after another and exchanging it for a new one. “When I met Choonhee, she was supposedly in a relationship with that guy.”

“Which one?” Namjoo carefully looked at the conflict in his face. It was stern, his eyebrows looked stiff, his eyes appeared daze, and his lips remained in a firm line. Tao appeared a little angry and spiteful at having to think about it. Seeing it and hearing it from it were both different things.

She was confused. What role had he played in Choonhee’s life to be so angry and upset at Sehun? Or more like, she thought, what had Sehun done?

She was suddenly sure that he might know more than he was letting on. How would she use him to find out more about the long lost twin?

“Sehun.”

Namjoo’s brows perked up. And suddenly she recalled the first time she met Tao. He had warned her about not going to see him. She hadn’t understood, but if she calculated now Kai had been in the city then which meant that it was Sehun who was returning from somewhere. Now the bigger question to solve was, why was he dangerous?

“You don’t like him?” Namjoo asked, more intrigued about the people who had shared their lives with her twin.

“You,” he said, “said you grew up in an orphanage and no one adopted you, which meant you grew up alone. Then you must have developed that kind of sense. You know immediately when someone is lying to you, if they’re going to hurt you; if they’re being sincere or have some kind of back motive.”

Namjoo put his words into thought. She wasn’t sure if she had developed such sense. Sometimes, it just seemed an obvious answer that someone was lying. But if she looked at Sehun…he confused her. It was hard to read him.

“What about it?”

“When I said Choonhee was supposedly in a relationship, I meant there wasn’t really anyone else in it with her.”

Namjoo felt her brain go haywire, her ability to transfer thoughts immediately burned out. “Say what?”

“I’m saying,” Tao repeated himself, “that Choonhee was in on the relationship herself.”