I couldn’t believe my eyes, those last few seconds felt like an awful nightmare that became reality. Thereafter, I got up on my feet again as I went back into the dorm.

”Kill me… I don’t want to live anymore…What are you waiting for huh?! Take my life away ffs!!” I screamed angrily at her.

It wasn’t worth living when the only person I’ve ever loved didn’t exist anymore.

Minzy chuckled evilly and said.

”Pft, did you really believe I’d let you get away that easily,huh? Just wait, I’ll be back.” Thereafter she left me - once I was alone again, I laid down on my bed; tearfully.

Dawn turned into dusk, yet I was in lack of sleep; it became difficult when I only could think of Kai. The images of his blood covered body rolling down the hallways, refused to disappear as they remained on repeat in my head.

DURING OPERATION

As soon as the young man was brought in for operation, doctors gathered up to prepare themselves - soon they’d be facing a difficult mission to manage. He was severely injured which made them question the possibility of bringing him back to life again. The hours passed by, still nothing had either changed or improved

- even though the operation required loads of work.

MORNING

A sleepless night is all I could receive, my body felt exhausted - yet I had a hard time falling asleep. During such a circumstance, I had no clue what to do. Yesterday felt like it never occurred but it eventually came to my senses; Kai was no longer a part of me, heaven gained an angel while I lost my other half.

Snow kept on falling from above as it carefully covered the windowsill - the snowflakes looked so fluffy and pure when they landed and covered the seiling.

I reached out my arm through the open window while they softly fell onto my hand. It felt like tears from an angel.

Thereafter, a few tears ran down my cheeks as I chuckled through the memories we had together. Old images raced past - from when we first met.

FLASHBACK

[ KSO ] ”Aish! Why? Are you a god damn baby?!”

[ KAI ] ”Do you always whine like this Kai? Knock it off, you’re so silly.”

[ KSO ]”Yah stop whine and keep walking. Hiya!”

[ KSO ] ”Where do you think you’re going lover boy?”

[ KAI ] ”Home, where else? Psycho..”

[ KSO ] ”Tsh psycho, for real?…”

[ KSO ] ”Sch.. Everything is gonna be alright lover boy

[ KSO ] ”Kai-sshi.”

[ KAI ] ”Yah.. what do you want shorty, let go of me.”

[ KSO ]”P-please don’t leave me here..I don’t want to be left alone at the hospital.”

[ KSO ]”….you’re different.. you make me wanna tell you my inner thoughts.”

[ KAI ]”..Yah.. stop looking at me like that.”

[ KSO ] ”What do you mean? Like this? Why? I appreciate looking at things that fills my life with happiness.”

[ KAI ] ”Don’t leave.. please.”

[ KAI ] ”Kyungsoo, why didn’t you tell me you had a heart disease?”

[ KSO ] ”I don’t have a heart disease, there must be some kind of a misunderstanding.”

[ KSO ]”…It was not meant that you would find out, especially not this way.”

[ KAI ] ”Find out what? The fact that you’re deeply in love with me?”

[ KAI ] ”Just come here.”

[ KSO ] ”Is this some sort of a joke? If that’s the case I don’t..”

[ KAI ] - Hugs KSO -

[ KAI ] ”Aren’t you done yet?”

[ KSO ] ”Huh?”
[ KAI ] ”Are you deaf? When are you gonna stop following me like a haunting puppy?”

[ KSO ] ”YOU!!”

[ KAI ] ”Me?”

[ KSO ] ”People like you Kai, is why I’m losing faith in humanity! Do I look stupid to you, huh? Don’t you think I know the real reason behind your visit?”

[ KAI ] ”W-what?”

[ KSO ] ”Oh, didn’t you hear me? Please leave, before I call the guards.”

[ KSO ] ”You’re so stupid…but I still love you…”

At last, I came back to the cold reality.

”Mr.Do…” I could hear someone yelling my name from a distance.

”Mr.Do..Are you there?”

It proved to be my doctor who stood by the door, somehow it felt like his voice echoed right through me. He came up and patted me on the shoulder.

”Huh?” Thereafter I turned my head and glared at him.

”You seem concerned, did anything happen after I left yesterday?”

”No..”

”I saw your father the other day, did he come to visit you? I mean, I certainly know how you feel about him.”

”I got to hear how I’ve failed as a son. According to him, I’m nothing but a disappointment..which didn’t really come as a surpise to me..”

He nodded with compassion.

”Unfortunately your father is a fairly narrow-minded man who can’t to see how kindhearted you are.”

I smiled lightly.

”Gomawo…”

”However.. the fact that my father is a very egocentric person.. won’t help me in any way. The love of my life is gone forever and there’s nothing I can do about it.”

The doctor glared shocked at me as he said.

”Wait what? Mr.Do, from what I understand - you think Mr.Kim have passed away?”

”How could I possibly miss it? His bloody torso was the only thing that catched my sight..”

He kept his eyes on me.

”I see… you must feel all devastated…”

The images of Kai came back on repeat, it made me feel all empty on the inside.

”But… I think there’s some sort of a misunderstandning..”

I looked at him with tears flowing down my cheeks.

”Huh? Wh-what are you talking about?”

”Kai.. I mean Mr.Kim is not dead..he’s most likely in coma for the moment..but we’re not completely sure if he’ll come back to life again..”

I didn’t give any sort of response which made it hard for the doctor to interpret with me.

”Are you ok Mr.Do?”

All I did was to sob quietly.

”The car happened to hit him quite hard.. which caused severely injuries.. I’m sorry you got to know it like this Mr.Do..”

”W-where is he now..?” My voice trembled.

He sighed

”For now.. he’s in the examination department.”

All I wanted to do was to sink through the ground.

I can’t be without you Kai… I can’t live without you…

My breathtakes became heavier and heavier, I could barely breathe properly.

”Sir.. I..I can’t live without Kai in my life.. you..you must help me..please..” I fell down on my knees with shivering hands as more tears penetrated through my eyes.

”Do you want to s