I stare at my wrist, hanging limply off the bed, a bruise in the prefect shape of human fingers  decorating it. For a moment I forgot what had happened, the headache was still raw and bursting from in between my head, I sit up in my bed, that I no longer feel is my own.

I clutch the shameful sheets to my bare body as I look to the pig beside me, sleeping peacefully, although such an angel face won't fool me anymore. I couldn't find the words, the strength to try and remember everything.

But I can guess what had occurred, the dim aching sensation between my legs is new, the blood staining the bed where I was lay, I cover my face with my hands in shame, letting out a ragged sigh as I grab my dressing gown from the ground, my entire body seems to ache, I ignore this and slide on the dressing gown before going into the bathroom. 

I catch myself on the door as my legs are weak, stumbling to the sink where i wash my face, I notice my hand trembling as I go to touch my body, I close my eyes and wash myself in utter silence, a shudder ruptures through me as I look at my reflection.

My eyes are tired, my neck is painted with disgusting red marks, bruises, even my shoulders have had their fight, my hand suddenly tightens on the sink, my eyes popping open in realisation, faded, unclear memories slug their way back into my head.

Suddenly everything was shaking, I would of thought it to be an earth quake if it wasn't for the soft whimper that escaped my mouth as I slid onto the cold tiles of the bathroom, I held in my scream of anguish as I clutched my body, I didn't make it to the toilet in time before I threw up around the lid, silent tears roll down my face as I hold my head.

The only person I could think to ask for help, but I couldn't. 

I feebly haul myself from the ground and make my way back into my room, I look at Jin from the bathroom door, I shudder, crossing my legs uncomfortably.

What do I do.

What can I do?

What haven't I done...

I look to his jacket that is sprawled across my carpet, carefully treading over till I have it in my grasp, but something tumbles out of the pockets and onto the ground, I drop the jacket and look down to my feet, seeing a packet with a label 'E'. 

There is only one way he could have got me like that, so vulnerable and able to do whatever he wanted, I don't remember being able to say yes...or no...just that glass in my hand...after that everything is a blur, a sick, twisted, monstrous blur. 

"Rohypnol" I murmur, the shape of the tablet, even the colour, I recognised it instantly, in disgust I let the bag slide from my feeble hands , I grab the end of my bed and help myself up as I look at Jin, my eyes also flicker to the distasteful blood stain that is on my bed, I feel tears roll down my face as I slap jin's leg, I'm shaking again. 

You can't be scared of him, I tell myself repeatedly. 

"Get up..." I croak out, I feel my tears get intense as he turns over and snores "Get Up!!!!" I scream from my lungs, sobs following after as I take the cover from his body, not giving myself a chance to glance.

"Ugh, ...what? Oh...morning Sulli" He sounds surprised to see me as I sit on the bed, facing away from him, I have my hands In balls,