“Let go.” I hissed, breaking the staring contest that had been going on for a few good seconds. I was not going to just stand there, waiting for him to talk like I had my entire life available for that matter. I yanked my wrist, not even bothering to cover up my discomfort with the physical contact and I could feel his grip loosened.

“Having a good term break?”

I sneered, seriously what kind of ridiculous greeting was that? He, out of all people, should have known better how my break was eventually spent with me drowning in sorrow and grief, thanks to a certain someone. “Why do you even care because as far as I know it’s none of your business. Stop talking to me and just pretend that we never even know each other.”

The moment I spun on my heels, gradually quickening my pace, I wondered if I had been too harsh on the guy and I mentally cursed myself from the thought. Ensuring that I had put a safe distance for him to no longer be able to spot me I peeked around the corner to confirm my thought. Feeling stupid,  I let out a ‘tchh’ before continuing to walk towards the end of the hallway. Apparently, my words did not affect him at all because all I could see was him bro-hugging with his group of friends, bunch of idiots whom I actually had gotten quite close to during some period of time. Not really bad people despite being players and a bit y at times, characteristics of theirs that you could only see when they hit on girls, only to give them false hope and as of their boys’ talk, I just didn’t want to explain it. Probably that was the reason I managed to make them an exception despite my current relation with the youngest one of their group.

Sehun’s face lit up with the friendliness that he only showed to certain people, particularly the closest ones. I came into the conclusion that it wasn’t wrong to throw those remarks onto his face because as far as I could see, he didn’t even give a single damn about it. Congratulations Yoon Chae Rim, for your idiotic thought.

Flashback

“I think it’s enough.”

“What do you mean?” I didn’t know why and how but I had gotten a hunch about what he was going to say and whatever it was, my intuition told me it wasn’t something good at all because he had been avoiding me, my calls and texts for these past few days.

“I want a break up.” The weather outside was clear and bright but my current train of thoughts and system were the complete opposite. It was barely two months since we were official and out of the blue he was dropping the bomb about wanting to end everything. I wasn’t ready to accept the reality. Heck, I didn’t even know what fault I had committed to deserve the one-sided decision he made. Swallowing my tears while trying to remain composed, I managed to voice a weak and shaky ‘why’, curious but at the same time frightened at the response he was going to give.

“I just…I just realized that I like someone else.”

What? Could one even call that a reason? Because if it was, it absolutely gave way for me to hate him even more now that I knew I wasn’t the one at fault.

“Then why…” I could feel myself begin to lose control, my voice raising a pitch higher as a wave of anger and frustration rushed inside me, the fact that I was chocking on my tears made it harder to phrase the words to the thought that had formed in my chaotic mind.

“Then w-why did you even confess to me?” Being a teenager, I guessed it was normal to be indecisive, moody, or childish but that didn't mean one could take such a matter, as serious as a relationship, so lightly when someone else's feelings and heart was at stake. I wasn’t going to stop myself from showing the disappointment and anger nesting inside me after finding myself being toyed with. I felt like a stupid, humiliated, embarrassed love-stricken idiot and from then on, I was going to walk around the school, with a label stuck onto my whole being,  screaming ‘Hey, I’m the girl Oh Sehun just dumped’. Well, that's if people were even aware of us being an item before because back then, we both tried to keep it lowkey, to take everything slow. That was the reason why only his circle of closest friends knew though somehow words started to spread as those girls who swooned over him claimed every single matter of his as theirs and decided to stick their noses into his business. However, before the news could even get a chance to spread like a wildfire, it quickly died down because right when the term break started, those girls lost their chances of trailing behind him, playing detectives as if to prove the truth of our relationship. Ironically, the term break wasn’t the real reason because just on the second day of the time off, we were no longer an item.

I remembered silence following my demand for an explanation so I switched to another enquiry. “Who is she?” I honestly had no idea which girl he might be referring to because I couldn’t recall ever casting a look at any. But again, it wouldn’t be called ‘cheating’ if it was done right in front of your face.

“You don’t need to know.”

I didn’t even bother to continue the conversation as I hung up, totally pissed off. It would still hurt at the end, wouldn’t it? So why bother wasting time? It wasn’t going to fix anything. I spent the entire night and the following days bawling my eyes out whenever I had a time to myself, wondering why these all happened in a blink of an eye and mentally noting how lucky the girl was to be chosen by him. Call me excessively emotional or whatever, but hey, he was my first love, the first guy I had ever gotten so close to. Days passed and I was still drowning in sadness and pain. My attempt to keep it all to myself and not let it show in front of others only doubled, if possibly, tripled the grief and sorrow clouding my entire being. There wasn’t any single day passed by without me praying and hoping that he would call again, mend our broken relationship and told me that he regretted everything.