Everything happened so fast. It was just one moment when he was looking at him. It was just a moment that they were laughing and happy and content with each others presence. And it happened again, only this time, it just didn't broke their hearts, it scarred their souls too. It happened so fast. Yet so slowly.

Yunho's world stopped but the pain that lies within them didn't. He saw Jaejoong's eyes, laced with pain slowly closes and for a split second, he thought Jaejoong would never open it again. He forced his trembling body and run. If only running could make everything fine. But it didn't.

Travelling from Daegu to Seoul in a remarkable time, Yunho deposited Jaejoong on an empty gurney once again. And as he was taken from him, Yunho's heart ached. He wondered how many more times does he have to witness the pain. How many more times does he have to endure it and be strong because he knew, he was on the verge of falling down. And he don't know if he'll ever had the courage to stand up.

Prayers were bounced off the walls of that hospital and he sat on the floor, his eyes blood shot from the tears that haven't made it's way down.

"Mr. Jung." a voice calling him snapped him out from his solitude and he stood up. Dr. Park weakly smiled and nod. And shook his head. And Yunho furrowed his brows and meet the doctor's gaze. Why did he shook his head? Yunho thought to himself. Is he telling him it's hopeless? Is he telling him there's no way to save Jaejoong? Is he --- ?

His questions to himself were cut off the moment Dr. Park broke the eye contact. The tall doctor cleared his throat and sighed. "Like I said before, Mr. Kim's body's no longer responding to his medicines. Even though we hed jumped on higher dosages, the medicines no longer can save him .." Dr. Park said.

And though he trailed off, Yunho knew he wasn't finished. And he didn't offered anything. His tongue was thick on his mouth. "But we can still perform chemotherapy. It can kill cancer cells but I can't tell you it would be effective. Chemotherapy wasn't a real cure because the effects vary from person to person. In some cases, some patients lived, some wasn't that lucky."

Yunho's face lighten, ignoring when Dr. Park said it wasn't a real solution. "It wasn't a guarantee but it can slow down the cancer cells that's spreading on his body. It can prolong and extend his time. To say at the very least. However, the problem is, Mr. Kim rejected the idea when we laid it to him for the very first time."

Yunho's mouth agape and he asked when was that. Dr. Park replied, "A month ago. The night he was brought in after he first fainted."

"What?" was all Yunho could say. His mind ached, as he tried to think why would Jaejoong reject the therapy that could save his life.

"It would be a good thing if we could convinced him to go through it." Dr. Park said and turned his heels to leave.

Yunho gently brushed his hand on Jaejoong's hair and his other hand made its way to encircle with the boy's hand. He smiled, he realized how easy it was to find Jaejoong's, how easy they find each other everytime.

Jaejoong's face flinched and he opened his eyes, and relief washed over Yunho's the moment he did. He smiled and Jaejoong turned toward the other way. Covering his face, he quietly said, "I've done it again huh? I'm sorry."

Yunho chuckled and shook his head. "Didn't I tell you not to apologize? It's fine. I'm fine." he said and faced him.

Finally, Jaejoong smiled but didn't said anything. It was the first time Yunho felt uncomfortable with the comfort of silence for there were questions left unanswered and feelings left unfelt. They took refuge in the silence until Yunho broke it, Jaejoong looked at him, confused.

"Anyway, I need to ask you something." Yunho started. Jaejoong smiled when he realized Yunho was in discomfort. But when the latter spat his dillema, Jaejoong's smile faded and his face dropped.

"It's about the chemotherapy." Yunho noticed Jaejoong's face but he continued. "I heard Dr. Park had said it to you, I want to know why you somehow refused to undergo that therapy."

Yunho heard Jaejoong sighed and he felt Jaejoong as he gently pulled his hand away from him. Jaejoong turned away and took refuge inside the silence again. But Jaejoong knew, he can't keep quiet forever. He has to give the answer to Yunho. After few bare breathings, he said, "I just don't like it. I heard it hurts."

But evidently, Yunho didn't buy it and pressed furthermore. "But it can save you Jae. Dr. Park said it to me. Why don't we try huh? He said it would hurt a bit but you can take it. I'm right here with you, so you don't have to worry." Yunho said with a cheery tone. But the other boy didn't even flinch. So he pressed on. "Don't you think it's a good opportunity? Dr. Park said it can also ---"

"Enough, Yunho." Jaejoong cuts him off quietly. But being Yunho, he continued. "He said it can prolong our time together, he said it can be a cure. Your body just have to respond to it. Isn't that amazing Jae?"

Jaejoong clutched the blanket on his body to the point of pain. His knuckles were white when he let it go. "Enough." he repeated.

Yunho shook his head. "But you have to ---"

"I said enough!" Jaejoong raised his voice and Yunho looked at him in disbelief.

"I don't want to go through that therapy. How many times do I have to tell you that?" Jaejoong softly said, feeling sorry he yelled at Yunho. "I want to know why." Yunho said, his voice hard. Jaejoong meet his gaze.

"Why? You moron because I'm getting married soon! And I don't want to walk in the aisle having no hair on my head with a very weak body. I don't want to humiliate you in front of everybody. I want to atleast look good in our wedding." Jaejoong snapped, and Yunho laughed. Jaejoong smacked his forehead and hid under his blanket.

Even so, Yunho continued to laugh. "Aww. Jaejoong got shy all of a sudden." he teased and tried to recollect his calm. And man, it took longer than he thought. He cleared his throat and snatched the blanket away from Jaejoong. He wholeheartedly smile and carressed Jaejoong's face. "Humiliate me? I don't think you'll do that, in fact, everybody would be jealous of me in our wedding day and who said you could do that?" he said, he brought his hand to Jaejoong's hair and kissed it. "You will still look good with or without this. You'll always be beautiful Jae. And I don't care if you walk in the aisle without your hair because for Pete's sake, I'm not marrying your hair, I only wanted you, so you don't have to worry. Okay?"

Jaejoong slowly nodded and Yunho kissed his forehead. And they stayed like that. And when Yunho jerked to kiss his lips, he tasted tears between it. And he asked why. Jaejoong's answer broke his broken heart once again.

"The real reason .. I .. don't want .. to go is because .. because .." Jaejoong broke down and tears rolled down his cheeks. He don't want to say it. And Yunho don't wanna hear it.

But Jaejoong muster up his courage and continued, "I don't want to do that because it will only bring you hope. And I can't bear to see your happy face crashed down the moment doctors said it will be hopeless. I can't bear it Ho. I can't." he said between sobs.

Yunho's hand trembled and he wanted to go and comfort him but he realized his body was too weak to move. He clutched his hand into fist and it all made sense to him now. The reason Jaejoong doesn't want to go through it was not because he was afraid it would hurt but because he thought it would be painful to have his hope so high just to be shattered and battered in that hopeless case of them.

In the end, Jaejoong only thought about how he'll feel about it. Jaejoong only cared about him. And he can't do anything but watch the man he loved cry. Another drop of silver light filled with pain rolled down, only it came from Yunho now.

Slowly, with trembling hands, he reached for Jaejoong's distant figure. When his flesh touched against him, he pulled him into a hug and they both cried.

"I don't want you to get hurt. I can't live with it." Jaejoong whispered, his voice dry and hollow.

"No. Don't say it Jae. It's fine. Don't worry about me. I can live with the pain and it was me who's supposed to protect you from it, not the other way around. So don't do this. You don't need to think about my sake. I will be just fine." Yunho muttered under his breath. "Now, you need that therapy. You have to do it. For you. For us. Please?"

Jaejoong's sob receded and he nodded finally. Yunho breath a sigh and hugged him tighter. He don't want to let go. Ever. He has to protect this man. The one who protected him from the pain hope could bring. The man who would rather die than to bring him false hope. But if Jaejoong's protecting him, who would do it for him? He has no one. And Yunho wondered why Jaejoong has to be selfless.

After Jaejoong calmed down with the help of a sedative drug injected on him, Yunho arranged the schedules of his chemotherapy. And though he didn't want to hold on to that procedure, he did. He had hoped. He hoped that it could save Jaejoong. Save them from misery brought by fate. But who knows fate was so cruel? Because inside the machine that will kill his cancer cells, his hell would also began.