“Kids.” The manager wore a grim expression as he closed the door behind him, back still facing the members of U-KISS.

Kevin, Soohyun and Eli got ready to stand up.

Dongho got ready to be pulled to his feet.

“No, I’m not asking you all to get back to practising.” The manager shook his head, and Eli immediately laid back down flat on his back. Kevin leaned against the nearest, Kibum, for support. It had been five hours of practising, practising and more practising. Dinner should arrive in two hours, Alexander hoped.

“But...I have bad news.” The manager choked on his words, and Kiseop immediately straightened his back in attention, eyes wide.

“U-KISS...is going to disband.”

Instead of chaos and a whole lot of noise that their manager expected to hear, there was a deafening silence. No one knew what to say, but no one dared to look at each other to find the right words either. There was suddenly a feeling of unfamiliarity between the members.

“Why?” Everyone turned to the one who dared to speak up, which was someone no one expected - Kevin.

The stares all turned back to their manager, making him break out in cold sweat, unable to speak for a second. “An idiot embezzled the company’s fund, so NH Media is about to face bankruptcy. Your promotions has recently ended and we have no capital for a new album, so there wouldn’t be any money coming in to help. President Kim has tried to call all other entertainment agencies to take you guys in, but no one believes such a plight and believes there’s something wrong with one of you guys that would probably cause U-KISS’s name to go downhill. The president didn’t want to tie you guys down, so he decided to disband U-KISS. You can choose where you want to go...and-“

Kiseop, the closest to the manager, immediately pulled the crying man into his arms. The rest looked at each other, unsure of what to do.

Dongho hit the floor, hard. “We can gather money, do some public performances and all, it wouldn’t be hard, right? Why do we have to give U-KISS up? I don’t want to!”

“And we can’t just leave NH Media like that, we’ve grown up here, spent maybe half our lives here. We have to help the President, especially if he just got married and already face bankruptcy!” Alexander agreed, resolvement clear on his sweaty face.

“Sue that idiot.” Eli suggested. “Can’t we get the money back?”

“He left the country...right after...he the company dry.” The manager said between sobs. Kevin couldn’t stand it and stood up to go towards their manager to give him a hug.

“I say we bring out all our money, ask from relatives and friends to save the situation.” Soohyun finally spoke.

“It’s useless. He wouldn’t listen, he doesn’t want to accept any money. He said it was all his fault to trust that man, he doesn’t want to bring you guys down.”

“What if we don’t care?” Kibum said defiantly.

“He doesn’t, either. He already officially announced this case closed, he wouldn’t listen.”

The members looked at each other, and Kevin started sniffing a little. It triggered Dongho to start crying, which made Kevin go into a full-fledge bawling session. Alexander screamed at them to shut up while tears rolled down his own cheeks uncontrollably. Kiseop hugged the manager tighter, reaching out a little to squeeze Kevin’s arm as some sort of comfort. He himself wasn’t a lot better though, wetting the manager’s T-shirt while crying on the older man’s shoulder. Eli stared at the ceiling from his spot, putting an arm over his eyes just so no one saw him tear up. Soohyun stood up and walked to a corner, before pacing around and concentrating on happy things (there wasn’t any appearing) to try and prevent tears from falling. Kibum left the scene.

-

After a lot of shouting and yelling, Kibum still cannot get his stubborn president to listen. This was it, U-KISS was over.

But everyone was so expectant. Everyone thought Kibum could make a difference, he was always so influential and everything.

“So? Did he finally agree?” Kibum felt all eyes on him, finally understanding the pressure their manager was going through.

“No.” He immediately saw crestfallen faces, and he blamed himself for being so useless.

“It’s okay, Kibummie-hyung. It’s not your fault.” Kevin smiled weakly as he pulled the older one into his arms.

“We can’t do music together, but we can still meet up.” Alexander tried to smile, but it looked awfully forced.

“Hyung is right, we can do that, really.” Soohyun patted Kibum’s back. “Don’t take it too hard.”

Eli bit his lips and called for attention.

“I got a message. We have to clear the dormitory by tomorrow.”

-

Alexander sighed as he searched for ingredients all around their dormitory’s kitchen. It was their last dinner together as U-KISS, he wanted to do something special.

“Xander-hyung? What are you doing?” Eli asked, standing by the kitchen’s entrance.

“I wanted to make a nice dinner for the kids, it’s...the last...” He choked on his words, and Eli immediately got him a cup of water.

“I’ll help you.” Eli sighed as he looked at what they had. There was a lot of food stored up because they thought they’d stay there for another week, before two to three members have to go stock up the kitchen again. “Let’s make a sumptous one, something unforgettable.”

Alexander agreed and they decided to keep all the instant noodles away.

“I’ll wash the vegetables.” Eli offered, noticing Alexander’s quietness. It was so uncomfortable to have silence with Alexander around. The older one only nodded and busied himself with the cutting of meat.

“I’ll miss you, Eli.” Alexander finally said after five minutes of silence.

“Don’t be silly, we can still meet up. Or we can talk on Twitter, I’ll promise to tweet more often.” Eli offered.

“It’s...It’s not the same.” Alexander whimpered softly. “We don’t...don’t feel like family anymore.”

“Rubbish, you can go overseas to study and your parents in Macau are family, but we go our own route and we aren’t.” Eli said gently. “We’re still family, Xander-hyung. Really.”

“It’s different. In our real families, we have blood bond. In U-KISS, we-“

“We have our music, we have our pictures, we have our videos.” Eli patted Alexander’s back. “Fans remember us as U-KISS and not individuals too.”

“But-“

Eli turned Alexander around with his washed hands and kissed the other rapper to shut him up. “Is this enough bond for you?”

“Eli, I-”

“I love you, I really do. I planned to keep it to myself because I didn’t want to spoil whatever we had, I didn’t want the fans to see it. But we’re breaking up and I don’t want to lose this chance. At least now I said what I feel, sorry if you feel disturbed.” Eli confessed, and lets go of Alexander, allowing him to back away if he wanted to.

“Really?” Alexander looked at Eli with hopeful eyes. “I thought I was alone...”

Eli immediately caught on and grinned like a little child. “You’re never alone.”

Alexander was brought close to Eli, and pinned against the refrigerator. Eli pressed his lips down on Alexander’s pink full ones, before the latter’s lower lip tenderly. This caused the older to slightly part his lips, only to close again over Eli’s mouth. They didn’t know how far they wanted to go, but Eli’s tongue slowly entered the older’s mouth, tracing the contours of Alexander’s well-aligned teeth. He took control of the small battle happening between them, despite the other being three years older.

Alexander clutched Eli’s shoulders, and the other took it as a signal to ease it down. Pulling away slowly, Eli allowed the feeling of one’s first kiss to hit Alexander. He smirked as he moved to work on their dinner. There’s nothing else except a certain thing from a certain someone that can fill their current appetite, but they had other members to care for.

-

Dinner was a quiet affair. Eli tried to keep his expression straight, knowing that they were still facing the fact that disbandment was tomorrow. He was really happy though, but he would keep it in. Only Alexander would be brainless enough to say it out.

“I don’t know how you guys will take this, but please be happy for me.” Alexander spoke as he picked some food for everyone. “Um, Eli and I are in an unofficial relationship.”

“It’s official.” Eli immediately said. How was it possible that they weren’t official?

“Oh, now it’s official.” Alexander quickly changed his words.

Kevin was the first to reply, with the sweet smile he always had. “Congratulations, it’s a good news, obviously we’ll be happy for you.”

“Thank you, Kev.” The oldest ran over to Kevin to give him a hug.

Kiseop slightly smirked. “I knew it, I was waiting for this to happen since forever.”

“Congratulations, be happy!” Dongho slightly smiled, before looking back down at his food and forking them. He didn’t feel like eating that day.

Soohyun and Kibum kept quiet but gave Alexander and Eli a smile. They just couldn’t get themselves to say anything.

“They’re really happy for you, Xander-hyung, don’t worry.” Kevin assured, patting the older’s back.

-

Kibum rolled in bed. It was only eight o’clock, but he wanted to sleep this nightmare away.

“Don’t leave me here...” The scene kept on replaying in Kibum’s head. The younger boy’s pleads were clear in his head, as he remembered what happened some three years ago.

He had been such a coward, not daring to tell the younger boy anything when he left. Yet, those interactions, those hugs, those times they lay on each other and went to dreamland, they all came back to him that day and hit him hard.

He cried that day, but there was no way he was going to tell Kevin that.

When they finally had another chance to come together as a new group, Kibum promised himself to never let the other go. The chance slipped by his hands once, and that was enough pain for his heart that was almost murdered that night.

So he tried everything he could to subtly but surely show Kevin that there was something Kibum had for him. He didn’t want to ruin whatever was between them, though. Kevin was affectionate, but maybe not gay. It would be dangerous, and Kibum didn’t dare take any chances.

Yes, he’s a freaking coward. Damn his guts.

He bites Kevin, knowing no other would do that. That was his mark. Kibum was smiling like an idiot to no one in particular that day, seeing that mark evident on Kevin’s arm.

The way Kevin moaned that day. Damn the cameras.

But then again, he wouldn’t dare to do anything.

He hits Kevin. He fake kicks him every time Kevin did something that was really cute. Just because he didn’t know how to react otherwise. Kevin would always laugh it off, his arm hanging over Kibum’s shoulders the next second.

The way Kevin would crawl up to him that night to say he got a tiny bruise, demanding the older to massage the pain away. Damn the contact.

He lets Kevin does what he wants to him. Kevin can hug Kibum from behind, cling to his arm, sit on him and really, everything, anything. Kevin was touchy, and Kibum was thankful for that. There was no other way Kibum would have liked Kevin to be, because he wouldn’t dare to be the one clinging, touching, hugging.

Really, damn his guts.

Then again, maybe not. He still needs it.

-

Soohyun was packing his clothes when he heard a knock on his door. He opened it and found Kibum, who walked in without being invited and allowed himself to fall onto the bed ungraciously.

“Yes?” Soohyun asked, ignoring temporarily what the younger boy was doing to his bed, more concerned with putting his clothes in order.

Kibum stood up after screaming into Soohyun’s pillow and turned the older man to face him. “Punch me.”

Soohyun raised an eyebrow. “Let me guess, this is about Kevin.”

“You don’t even have to guess. Just punch me.” Kibum sighed, taking Soohyun’s wrist and stopped him from packing. “Punch me.”

“What is it this time?” Soohyun frowned, sitting down on his bed and patting a spot beside him for Kibum to sit down and tell the story.

“I don’t dare to say a word. I’m an idiot, I deserve to be punched.” Kibum shook his head, unwilling to sit down. “Do me a favour, punch me.”

Soohyun firmly shook his head. “They’ll be hysterical. I’m not the kind to worry people.”

“If you don’t punch me, I might really go find a knife, just so you know.” Kibum shrugged as carefreely as he could, ready to leave Soohyun’s room.

“You idiot!” Soohyun pulled Kibum back in a swift motion and punched Kibum’s stomach. “Don’t you dare hurt yourself.”

Kibum took in the impact and shouted naturally. “Oopfh.”

“And you had all the time to confess, you didn’t. Now’s the last chance, you’re still not grasping it!” Soohyun yelled, taking out his anger on Kibum with more punches. Really, the older one was actually facing the same thing himself. He just hasn’t thought of self-inflicting pain.

Dongho rushed in as he heard noises from his room. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING, SOOHYUN-HYUNG?! LET GO OF KIBUM-HYUNG NOW!”

Soohyun stopped what he was doing and turned to Dongho. “Get out, this is none of your business.”

Dongho looked visibly hurt, and Soohyun bit his lower lip.

“Sorry.”

“Then stop fighting.” Dongho walked closer to the duo and tugged Soohyun’s arm. “Please? Why are you guys fighting, anyway?”

“No, Dongho, you don’t get it. I’ll explain it later or something, for now, don’t interfere.” Soohyun gently pushed Dongho out of his room, but Dongho got out of Soohyun’s grip on his shoulders and turned to glare at him.

“Stop treating me like a baby, I’m not one!” Dongho yelled. “I’m not too young to know anything, I’m at the right age to know everything! I’m not very different from you guys, really. Is five years a lot? NO! I’m seventeen, for God’s sake! When you were seventeen, were you young and innocent? You probably knew a lot already, so why are you treating me differently?!”

Kevin knocked on the door politely before walking in to check out the ruckus. “What happened, Dongho? Soohyun-hyung? Kibummie-hyung?”

Kibum looked away, Soohyun took Dongho’s hand and put it into Kevin’s. “Kevin-ah, take Dongho away.”

“NO! Kevin-hyung, Soohyun-hyung is fighting with Kibummie-hyung!” Dongho shook Kevin, who looked horrified.

“Why are you two fighting?” Kevin frowned, deeply concerned.

“Kevin, get out now.” Soohyun tried harshly. Kevin blinked and Dongho stood before Kevin, acting as a shield.

“We’re not getting out. Never.” Dongho glared back at his favourite hyung. It took a lot for him to stand up against Soohyun-hyung, but Dongho was sure he wasn’t going to regret this.

“Forget it, Soohyun-hyung. Let’s end it here.” Kibum said and made his way out. However, he was caught by Kevin’s hand, which was wrapped around his wrist.

Kibum looked away instead of at Kevin. “Hyung...what happened?”

“It’s nothing, really.”

After Kibum left, Soohyun looked at Dongho again. “Dongho, we have to talk.”

“No.” Dongho stated simply. “Until you realise I’m not a kid. Really, put me with people my age and you’ll be shocked at my maturity.”

Dongho pulled Kevin along with him as they left Soohyun’s room.

-

Kevin smiled weakly as Dongho cried again his chest like a little kid. He wasn’t going to tell Dongho that, though. The youngest one would get all defensive.

“Everyone thinks I’m a baby, but I’m not a baby! I’m a man already, really!”

Kevin nodded while patting Dongho’s back. “I know, Dongho, I know.”

“Just that among us seven, I am the youngest. But that doesn’t make me a child, a baby!”

“Yes, it doesn’t. You’re the one who knows how to deal with people, after Kibummie-hyung, anyway.” Kevin said as Dongho pulled away and looked into the older’s eyes.

“Why is it only you that sees that in me? Why does no one else understand me?” Dongho whined.

“Maybe we’re just so used to the fifteen years old you, we don’t want that to change, so we’re stuck with thinking that you’re a baby? Don’t be eager to change that opinion, it’s something nice to remember you as.” Kevin smiled sadly.

“Hyung, I don’t want to leave U-KISS...” Dongho hugged Kevin tightly.

“Me neither, I’d miss you a lot. But..we can meet up. It doesn’t all end here.” Kevin tried, although he wasn’t sure if they would still contact each other. Maybe they’d think of this as a part of their lives, to move on after U-KISS was gone. Maybe they wouldn’t see each other ever again.

“Should I...” Dongho breathed in to stop himself from sobbing. “Should I tell Soohyun-hyung what I feel about him?”

Kevin giggled softly and patted Dongho’s head. “Yes, you should.”

“I think I will then. Kevin-hyung, what about you?”

Kevin looked out of the window and shook his head. “I don’t know.”

-

The table lamp was switched on, and Kevin searched for all the materials he needed. Call him cheesy, but he wanted to write a card for all s.

“Dear Alexander (No formalities because I’m writing this in English. Do not scold me ^^),

It had been lots of fun being able to have (so many) schedules with you, and us taking care of each other when it’s just us. Although your nagging gets on my nerves at times, I know it’s plainly out of concern and love. When we have the time, let’s do a food adventure like we agreed to! I have a sudden craving for mango pudding, hehe. Thank you for everything you’ve done for U-KISS as a whole and for everything you’ve kept inside yourself regarding my bluntness. Best of luck to your relationship with Eli, and your future. Thank you for appearing in my life and bringing me lots of laughter. Let’s keep in touch on Twitter? ^^

Love,
Honeyvin, Mervin, whatever-vin you have for me. ^^”

“Dear Eli,

It is a blessed thing to have a friend like you, just so you know. I still remembered my joy when I first met you and realised we’re both from the States. I guess you were glad too, because your Korean was horribly broken. Hehe~! Anyway, stop being so un-touchy. I don’t know if there’s a word for it, but well, Alexander’s a little on the touchy side so you cannot flick him away like the times you do to me. Humpfh! Kick off that habit for your new boyfriend! ^^ Thank you for being U-KISS’s pigeon as a moodmaker. Tweet more, all right? ^^

Love,
Kevin.”

“Dear Kiseopie,

We spend a lot of times together even though you joined us late, right? I hope this journey as a U-KISS member has been as fun for you as it had been for me. It was fun hanging out together, laughing with you, laughing at you. You have to stop being so mindless about some things though. Not everyone is as nice as me, hehe~! If you meet a species of monkey-like human, Alexander and his clones, they would nag so badly at you. ^^ I would pray for you to have a good future in whatever you plan on doing next, and thank you for everything you’ve done (or not done, phew. Kekeke, kidding~!) for me and U-KISS. I would miss you so much, so remember to call me or ring my doorbell when you’re free! AND CREATE A TWITTER ACCOUNT, ARGH. If you don’t know how to, admit it to me and I’ll send you step-by-step instructions, really. ^^

Love,
Kevin.”

“Dear Dongho-ah,

Our baby! I know you don’t really like to hear that, but what can I do if you’re so adorable? When this card reaches you, promise me you wouldn’t cry. Hehe~! Kidding, we both know I’m the one who would cry, keke. It’s been really fun teasing you that I was more adorable when you were fifteen, but you grew up and became cuter. Sighs, no more teasing from me. Hehe, thank you for letting us bully you! I don’t, but hehe, thank you. You said you will confess to Soohyun-hyung, so here’s to you two loving each other forever. I’m sure it’ll be a success, don’t doubt me~! By the way, stop letting your Twitter die. Your last tweet is a photo of me and you, I’m thankful, but start tweeting already!

Love,
Kevin-hyung. ^^”

“Dear Soohyun-hyung,

I’ll just assume you’d read this card after Dongho confessed. Good luck to the both of you! If he hasn’t confessed, then take this card as a hint and go to his house and beg him to be your boyfriend. He’ll cry, I’m sure. Hehe~! ^^ It was great singing songs with you, especially since our voices are so different they match somehow. Thank you for being so brotherly to everyone in U-KISS. I won’t hide this from you, because I know you wouldn’t take this the wrong way. I’m looking for a new entertainment agency already. I’m sure you’ll continue your dream, so if we have a chance, let’s do a duet, okay? ^^ I realised I’d talked to everyone about Twitter, so here : Tweet more! In words! Okay, maybe picture are better...

Love,
Kevin.”

Kevin stared at the last card for twenty minutes and felt sleep slowly engulfing him. He sighed and kept everything away.

“I don’t know where to start...”

-

Kevin was the first to wake up, as always. It was five in the morning, though. After freshening up and preparing breakfast for the rest, he returned to his room and brought out the card he couldn’t write yesterday.

Should he include his feelings?

Fiddling with his pen, he started drawing random shapes which all ended up looking like they are forming a big heart shape.

“Dear Kibummie-hyung,

I
Thank you for

Love,
Kevin. ^^”

Kevin sighed, it wasn’t working. Whatever he wrote sounded horribly awkward.

Suddenly, Kevin had an idea.

-

Dongho was the last of the seven to drag out his luggage. Kevin tried not to look back, in case he couldn’t control his overflowing emotions. Soohyun locked the door after taking one last look at the insides.

“So...we’re parting here?” Alexander asked, clinging to Eli for support. His knees might give way the minute he lets his emotions free.

No one said a word, and Kevin decided that this was the time to give out his cards. He made a round, starting from Kiseop who was right beside him, and then Alexander, Eli, Soohyun, Kibum and Dongho.

Everyone took it with a smile, especially Kiseop who looked at the card’s front. It was so Kevin to do such a thing, decorating his name with many colours and some random drawings. Everyone kept their cards, except Kibum who held it in his hand.

There was an awkward silence for what seemed to be eternity. No one wanted to walk away, but no one really wanted to stay in that atmosphere.

“Let’s...let’s hug for the last time.” Kiseop suggested, uncomfortable with the feeling that was lingering in the air.

The members quickly complied, a big group hug with everyone everywhere.They stayed like that for a long minute.

“I’ll miss you all.” Kevin whispered.

Soohyun got Kevin out of the group hug and squeezed him tight. “I’ll miss you too, take care of yourself and remember to eat.”

The group hug slowly disappeared, the members all hugging each other and saying their parting words.

“Remember to consult your teacher if you don’t know how to do equations, if not, find me at my house and I’ll give you free tuition.” Alexander pinched Dongho’s cheeks with a grin. “Don’t forget to wash your hands after you floss your teeth, you hear me?”

Kiseop mumbled into Eli’s ears as they hugged each other. “Xander-hyung might get annoying at times, but be nice to him. He has a soft spot for food. He gets angry, you buy him food. Treat him well, good luck to the both of you.”

Kibum smiled at the scene and looked down at his card. He opened it and glanced through its content.

“Kibummie-hyung,

For U-KISS to have rose up till where we are now, I thank you for contributing and being there, from the bottom of my heart. We worked hard and came this far, let’s preserve this memory in our minds forever [A/N : Kibum’s Thanks To in Break Time album, “Kevin” twisted it a little]. It was great working with you since 2006, I wouldn’t exchange this experience for anything in the world.

Love,
Kevin. ^^”

“Learn to be independent, Dongho. We are unable to be there to protect you anymore. Eat a lot, because you’re still growing, and sleep well.” Soohyun sighed as he brought Dongho into a hug. “You’re the one who worries me the most.”

Dongho screamed suddenly. “Stop it! I told you, I’m not a baby!”

Kevin immediately pulled away from Eli and went to Dongho’s side. “Dongho, calm down!”

“Is that why you never take me seriously?” Dongho ignored Kevin and advanced towards a visibly stunned Soohyun. “Is that why everytime I tell you I know what I’m doing, you laugh it off? Because you never thought that I was anything more than just a baby?!”

The rest could only stare at the scene, even Kibum, who was stupefied by Dongho.

“Because damn you, Soohyun.” Dongho quietened down, disregarding his lack of formalities. “You took my heart away and never gave it back. I told you “I love you” way too many times and I only got my heart cut, slashed, scarred by you. If you don’t know how to treasure my heart, return it to me and just go away. Stop acting like you care for me if you don’t for my feelings.”

Dongho picked up his luggage and started walking away. Kevin ran over to Soohyun and shook him.

“It’s now or never, hyung. Dongho loves you, do you?”

“Wait, Dongho, wait!” Soohyun ran after Dongho and stopped him in his tracks.

“WHAT?! I don’t need your pity, I’m all grown up and I know how to fix a broken heart myself, thank you very much.” Dongho rolled his eyes spitefully.

“But I love you too.” Soohyun confessed, leaning down to kiss Dongho’s lips. All tension was immediately gone as Dongho wrapped his arms around Soohyun’s body, and Soohyun took the sign to bring the kiss up a level. The older’s tongue darted out to taste Dongho’s lips, causing the younger one to bring Soohyun closer by tightening his grip.

Kevin buried his head into Kiseop’s chest, embarrassed by such a scene. Alexander and Eli looked at each other and started making out.

Kibum felt lonely.

-

Fruit baskets greeted him when he woke up, in an environment unfamiliar to him. He looked towards his right, where he felt a weight pressing down against his arm.

“Kevin?” Kibum greeted quietly. The boy stirred a little and smiled as he brought his head up.

“You’re up, Kibummie-hyung.”

“Why am I here?” Kibum asked as he looked around. Hospital.

“You fainted while Dongho and Soohyun-hyung were...erm...yeah. Kiseopie laughed at you, thinking you couldn’t take it, but the doctor said you were beaten up and the recent fatigue got the better of you.” Kevin explained. “Why were you beaten up? Was it the encounter with Soohyun-hyung? What happened, really?”

“Where...where are the others?” Kibum feigned dumb and asked, looking behind Kevin for dramatic effect.

Kevin sighed, Kibum immediately regretted his act. “They went home first to put their luggage. They’ll be here soon.”

“You...why didn’t you?” Kibum then saw Kevin’s luggage at the corner of the room, beside his own.

“Someone had to stay, anyway.” Kevin smiled. “Don’t ask so much and get the rest you need. Do you want some water?”

“It’s okay. I’m fine, really.” Kibum assured with a slight smile.

“Really? Then can I ask if the fight with Soohyun-hyung was because of me?” Kevin bit his lip. “You never hide anything from me, but you aren’t answering me anything related to this issue at all.”

“It’s not a fight.” Kibum started. “And...no, it’s not. Why would you think it’s because of you?”

“Why were you punched then?” Kevin questioned, perplexed. “It’s not a fight, then what? You asked to be punched?”

“Erm..yeah.” Kibum scratched his head.

“Why do you want to lie to me? We aren’t even going to meet again in the future...can’t you just tell me the truth one last time?” Kevin muttered under his breath, announcing defeat internally. Kibum wasn’t going to tell him the truth, that he was sure. “I...I think I’m tired. I’ll go home first. The others will come soon.”

Kibum’s eyes followed Kevin as he walked away.

He was the biggest idiot.

The two times he was forced to let Kevin go, it was never on a happy note. It could have been, if he was a better liar. The heartbreak he felt was sharp and agonizing, attacking him as if it was poison flowing in his blood. He writhed on the hospital bed, unable to stop the pain that was leaving him breathless.

This time too, tears fell.

Again, he let Kevin go.

-

Kibum knew he would see him soon.

But he didn’t expect it to be so soon.

“Annyeonghaseyo! dREAlM imnida!” A five-membered group shouted out in unity, their fresh faces smiling at the cameras. [A/N : I was thinking of the pronunciation The Realm when forming dREAlM. It’s short for The Dream Realm]

He was only there to visit his brother, who told him to get him some coffee because there wasn’t a branch of his favourite coffee shop nearby. Being free of schedules, he decided to make himself useful and thus made a trip down to the recording studio.

He stood in a corner where no one would turn to, keeping his visit as secretive as possible. Besides, it was embarrassing to say that he went there just to buy coffee for his brother.

So Kibum stared on, interpreting every move. He didn’t, and couldn’t, concentrate on what was happening. He just stared on, wondering what he was thinking.

“Hello everyone, I’m Kevin of dREAlM, please take care of me~!” Kevin greeted with a sweet smile. He nudged the person beside him lightly with a pout as the other tried to keep in his laughter. Kibum didn’t know what was funny, and somehow, he didn’t like that guy laughing at Kevin.

“Hello! I’m Joonwon of dREAlM, nice to meet you!” That guy smiled widely. So his name is Joonwon?

Kibum zoned out after that, ears refusing to hear anything. He looked at them as they played fun games according to the script, and after two games, the producer shouted.

“Break time!”

Kibum chuckled humourlessly, remembering U-KISS’s last mini album name almost instinctively. He saw Kevin jerk his head up, knowing exactly what was going through the other’s mind. And then he saw sadness in those brown eyes, sorrow that he never thought he would see again. Didn’t Kevin move on?

Hyungjoon looked down at his watch and wondered when his little brother would come. Once he knew the people who were coming to the recording, he immediately devised a plan to let the two meet. Kibum had been sleeping since forever, too lazy to lift a finger to do anything really. Maybe the disbandment affected him too much, and Hyungjoon wanted to lessen the pain of his beloved little brother. Kibum used to speak fondly of his bandmate, so maybe that would cheer him up.

But where was he?

“Kevin-ah.” Hyungjoon greeted as he walked towards the younger boy.

“Oh, Hyungjoon-sunbaenim.” Kevin bowed slightly, even though he already did earlier that day. “Is there anything you want me to do?”

“Oh no, relax, I just wanted to chat. And don’t use formalities. Treat me like Kibummie, it’s fine, really.” Hyungjoon chuckled. “So, how’s life?”

“Okay, Hyungjoon-hyung.” Kevin started awkwardly. It was hard to treat Hyungjoon like Kibum. Especially when he had feelings for the younger one and none for the older one. “It’s...pretty good. I’m in the new group as you can see...Erm, how’s...how’s Kibummie-hyung’s condition?”

“Condition?” Hyungjoon widened his eyes. “He has a condition? He has been sleeping like a pig since forever, is that a condition?”

“He was in the hospital the last time I saw him. Does that mean he got better?” Kevin asked, concern all over his face.

“Oh, that. He got better really fast. It was nothing, really, that boy could take a few more punches and survive. Don’t know why he got punched though, Kibummie never lets anyone hit him if he can help it.” Hyungjoon laughed heartily, but Kevin frowned.

So it really was his fault. What did he do to cause Kibum to get punched? Does that mean he really didn’t lie?

“Um, I don’t mean harm to my brother, of course.” Hyungjoon quickly added, noticing Kevin’s expression.

“I know.” Kevin gave an angelic smile immediately.

“Well, I shouldn’t stop you from interacting with your new members.” Hyungjoon shrugged, prepared to leave.

Kevin reached out for the older’s hand. “Please...don’t go.”

Hyungjoon stood there, surprised. The younger’s voice had been so weak and soft.

“Is there something wrong?”

Kevin bit his lower lip and wondered how to say this. “I...actually...They don’t like me.”

Hyungjoon widened his eyes, unable to comprehend. Kibum always had so many nice things to say of this boy. “But, you’re so lovable. Adorable, everything really.”

Kevin shook his head. “Thank you for the praises, but not really. The company wanted me to bring the group to popularity...so if you have seen our debut song...I literally had the whole song to myself. I don’t like it, but they want me to do it. The three thought I knew this was going to happen, asked me why I didn’t debut all over again as a solo artist and whatnots so they have their chance to shine, giving me a horrible time in the dormitory and all. Only Joonwon doesn’t mind me, but he can’t do much since he’s the second youngest.”

Hyungjoon immediately had a bad impression of the other three pretty boys that were smiling and laughing throughout the recording. He wondered what he could do, so he stared at his two hands and pulled Kevin in to hug him. “I don’t know how to help you, Kevin. But if you have any ideas, feel free to tell me. I’ll try my best.”

Kibum frowned from his side. He saw tears sliding down Kevin’s pale cheek, and he stepped out of the shadows.

“What’s wrong?” Kibum asked, not bothering to greet anyone. He harshly shoved his brother the coffee that had pretty much lost its coldness, taking over the job as Kevin’s teddy bear. “Don’t cry, the stylists would scream at you.”

“No, our stylists are different.” Kevin informed, happiness evident in his voice when he saw Kibum. He squeezed Kibum tighter, and so did Kibum’s grip around Kevin’s waist. “I missed you, why didn’t you call?”

“I...” Kibum hesitated. He didn’t know either. Maybe he was scared, he was afraid. Like how he never dared to speak of his feelings. He didn’t dare to appear too affectionate, not daring to call because he knew he would end up calling every hour, then every minute, then maybe their phone bills would be a six-digit number [A/N : Equivalent to about three-digit US dollars]. “I was busy.”

Kevin giggled softly, carefully wiping his tears away while staying in Kibum’s embrace. Just a few more minutes, before he has to return to reality. Just let him dream a bit more. “Busy sleeping! Hyungjoon-hyung told me of your amazing sleeping times.”

“He did?” Kibum glared at Hyungjoon, who immediately got defensive.

“I’m kidding, but he said you slept like a pig.” Kevin chuckled and started teasing. “Pig, pig! You’re no longer the flower deer you call yourself.”

“Yes, yes. Fish, fish, don’t ever cry again. Especially when I’m not there to laugh at you.” Kibum said, words were heavy with emotions, rather than how he wanted it to be. Light and carefree.

Kevin pulled away slowly, smiling at Kibum. “I’ll still cry though. But I’ll call you over, so you can laugh at me.”

Kibum’s face was serious, as he cupped the younger’s face. “Why did you cry?”

Kevin immediately averted his eyes from Kibum’s piercing ones. It was fine to tell Hyungjoon, but not to Kibum. Kibum was protective like that.

“His new bandmates don’t like him. Except that Joonwon guy.” Hyungjoon whispered, much to Kevin’s dismay.

They don’t like Kevin? Are they nuts?

“I’ll go speak-“

“Don’t!” Kevin pleaded. “Please don’t, Kibummie-hyung, I’ll be fine. Please?”

“Back to filming!” The producer shouted. Everyone scampered into position, while Kibum stayed at the side and looked on.

Every interaction Kevin had with s now disgusted Kibum thoroughly. Under those smiles were actually such thoughts, causing Kibum to suddenly feel thankful to Joonwon. At least Kevin’s smile was real beside him, at least he didn’t feel uncomfortable.

-

Kibum followed dREAlM’s activities religiously for a month already. Kevin spoke less and less, rarely smiling even. Kibum was really just spotting hints and evidences.

“Fifth compilation.” Kibum muttered to himself. Hyungjoon was free, and was thoroughly amused at Kibum’s actions.

“You’re gay.” Hyungjoon said, not even carrying the tone of a question. More like a statement. “You like Kevin, in a way you’re not supposed to.”

“Shut up.”

“HAH. I’M RIGHT.” Hyungjoon grinned, but the next second, his face was back to grim. “Why don’t you ever tell him? You had so much time.”

“I...don’t know how to.” Kibum stuttered, sighing because he knew his brother was right.

“Oh, my brother’s scared.” Hyungjoon teased. “He’s a wimp, but he acts all strong in front of Kevin.”

“Shut up.”

“What are you doing with these videos anyway?” Hyungjoon asked as he picked out one that said “Second Compilation.”

“Bringing U-KISS back.” Kibum mumbled, scanning through one variety show dREAlM was casted on.

“How does this bring U-KISS back? Tell you what, I’ll help you with bringing U-KISS back if you help yourself.” Hyungjoon nudged Kibum to listen to him. “Hey, I mean you go confess and I’ll do the whole bring U-KISS back thing.”

Kibum looked at his older brother with a raised eyebrow. “You?”

“Yes, me! HEY!” Hyungjoon pouted, offended by Kibum’s remark.

“I think I’d rather trust myself.” Kibum shook his head.

“But..but I have an awesome plan!” Hyungjoon whined, tugging Kibum to listen to him. “You just go confess and I’ll help you with my awesome plan! Deal?”

“Tell me and I’ll see if it’s good.” A shrug. “If not then why should I care dealing with you?”

“HEY, I’M YOUR ONLY BROTHER!” Hyungjoon gritted his teeth and folded his arms with an angry pout. “I won’t tell you until you go confess.”

“That means it’s a horrible plan.” Kibum smirked, pushing Hyungjoon to the limits.

“IT’S NOT! YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW MY PLAN, MY PLAN IS TO...” Hyungjoon explained while flailing his arms, happy that he was such a genius to think of such an idea.

“Well thank you, now go work on it.” Kibum grinned. The idea does sound good, plausible, workable.

“OH NO. I just told you my plan without you confessing! ARGHHHH.” Hyungjoon took a pillow and whacked his own head. “I’m so stupid at times.”

“At times?”

“SHUT UP!”

-

“Get out of there, Kevin.” Kibum ordered. Kevin stood there, shell-shocked, causing Kibum to walk over to yank the younger one to his side. “Let’s go.”

“What? Kibummie-hyung, what’s this supposed to mean?” Kevin blinked, looking back at s who were as clueless as he was.

“You don’t belong there.”

You belong with me, Kibum thought.

“Why not? What are you doing? I have a show to film!” Kevin pleaded Kibum to let go, bending his knees to put his entire weight on one hand.

“dREAlM is now a four-membered group. I talked to your company’s president, you’re out.” Kibum stated, before dragging Kevin with him as he left.

“Hyung! You’re taking this too far! You know I love singing, it’s my dream! Why are you doing this to me?!” Kevin sobbed, tears rolling out in a few seconds. He tried a futile attempt to break free from Kibum’s grip, but it was stronger than he last remembered it to be.

“Have you given up on us? U-KISS? They aren’t nice to you anyway.” Kibum stopped midway to turn Kevin to face him, and the latter didn’t reply for a moment.

“I...never gave up on us. We couldn’t stay together, but I wanted to fulfill...our dreams.” Kevin said quietly, looking at the cold, hard floor as though for some response. “Remember? We said we’ll sing till the world gets tired of us. You promised, yet why am I the only one taking action?”

“I remember, but I won’t do it without you...kiss as a whole.” Kibum internally smacked himself for being so bad at this.

“But no one wants us!” Kevin shrieked, losing control of himself. “I waited, I did!”

“Follow me.”

-

“Tell me what this is all about!” Kevin demanded as he got dragged out of Kibum’s car, still not knowing anything. He already screamed at Kibum in the car, but the older still refused to say a word.

It would be pretty horrible to tell Kevin that he had been squinting for moments where Kevin looked like he didn’t want to be in dREAlM, compiling those moments together, and getting enough to throw it at dREAlM’s company’s president. Kibum actually threatened to sue the company for not protecting their artists since they let Kevin stayed on to be discriminated. The company was small, so the president backed away almost immediately, guilty as charged. The second half sounds pretty heroic, but following every dREAlM activity? Stalker-like, scary.

“You’ll see.” Kibum simply stated, picking up his pace.

“I don’t want to guess anymore, Kim Kibum! Tell me right now!” Kevin screamed, trying to shake off Kibum’s grip.

“No.”

“What do you mean no! Stop brushing me away like-” Kibum reached a door and opened it, before throwing Kevin forward. Slightly wincing, Kevin closed his eyes and waited for a painful impact...that never came. Instead, the floor felt pretty firm. Not soft but not brick hard either. He was half standing, too.

“It’s great to see you in real life again, Kev.” Kiseop greeted happily, hugging the younger one tight.

Kevin was too speechless to speak, as he got hugged by every single one of his U-KISS members, except Kibum who was watching from the side.

“But...how?” Kevin managed to slip in as he was tightly squeezed by the last member, Dongho, who started bawling on Kevin’s dREAlM promotional outfit.

“Kibummie’s hyung spoke to DSP Entertainment and they signed us on without hesitation. It’s the same contract SS501 had, so everything will be all right.” Soohyun explained, pulling the youngest two into a hug. “Everything will be all right.”

Kevin pulled away, clearly on the verge of tears. He turned to the only one out of this whole embracing thing.

Kibum only smiled back at him.

It was just that night, just that night, Kevin wanted to break all rules and overcome all boundaries so badly. He lunged forward and kissed Kibum full on the lips.

“I love you, hyung.” Kevin whispered, in a certain way to show that he didn’t meant he was merely thankful for Kibum bringing them all together again.

Kevin didn’t care what Kibum thinks. He cares about what he himself thinks. Kevin thinks Kibum’s his angel, although everyone thinks Kevin’s the angel.

Kibum taught him how to survive in the industry, Kibum taught him how to take selcas at the best angles, Kibum taught him how to follow his heart despite what others say, Kibum taught him how to protect himself when he can’t be there.

Kibum led U-KISS although they didn’t have a leader, Kibum promoted U-KISS in horribly long sentences, Kibum ensured U-KISS ate right. By some awful twist of fate, U-KISS was forced to disband, Kibum brought the band back into their lives. By some sick twist of fate, he got stuck in a band that didn’t like him, Kibum got him out of the mistakenly signed contract.

But Kevin cares about what Kibum thinks, really.

“I love you too, and at last I got it out.”

Especially if he thinks the way Kevin does.

“Because if I lost you again, it’ll be my lifelong regret. If, I can live that long without you.”

Dongho cuddled close to Soohyun. “Kevin-hyung and I are the real men. You and Kibum-hyung should be ashamed.”

Everyone laughed at that, Soohyun ruffling Dongho’s head in the process. There was nothing better than getting back together.

They all knew it, especially Kibum, who kissed Kevin sweetly, never letting Kevin go the third time.

-

I’m really thankful for all the love this “fic”, as in this whole “story” is getting.
I think one shots are not very popular on AFF, but thank you to the 15 subscribers who liked my fic enough to wait for other one shots!
And of course the commenters who spent time writing a nice little note to me :D
All these one shots are actually posted before (except Someday and Like a Cinderella story), and this was obviously way before Kibum and Alexander’s departure, when I just started writing U-KISS fic. I think it was about a year ago? Time passed so fast, and now so much has changed :S