"And I remember so clearly-" 

The pen held between the thin, long fingers kept moving, writing down words neatly on a page of the long, untouched diary.
 
"How nervous we were, and how Dongho almost, wait, no, he did RUN away and say he didn't want to debut."
 
A light chuckle, before the figure turned his head to the window, looking at how late it was. "Should be about time."
 
The pen tip was placed once more on the page, sliding around between the lines. "From the 28th of August, 2008, I was no longer an unknown citizen in the crowd. It was precious, the sudden change of identity, the exhilarating feeling of stage fright, hearing, just hearing a distant scream of my name."
 
-
 
Kevin crossed the dates on his calendar standing beside his computer. U-Kiss's Someday track has been released on the 26th, nothing much happening on 27th, and...and their third anniversary was tomorrow.
 
He sighed.
 
He would have to wait till the clock strikes twelve before he can sleep. Then, he'll tweet a little, stay around for a bit and probably, finally, sleep. Kevin snuggled against the warm blanket and randomly searched around Twitter for something to do, since there was still time to kill.
 
What were the other members doing on such a night?
 
-
 
The clock strikes twelve.
 
-
 
Dongho watched from the sidelines, slightly envious but not really knowing what to say to be included into the conversation.
 
Plainly thanking the fans for being with them for three years already, he pouted longingly.
 
He didn't dare cut in, though part of him ached so badly to do so. If only he had something to say, and not "Happy 3rd Anniversary" because that was awkward.
 
If only he could walk over to Kevin's room and ask for an opinion. But even that, just asking Kevin a seemingly innocent question, was a lot more different on a day like this, on a topic like this.
 
-
 
Eli understood those English tweets a lot easier than Dongho, knocking on Kevin's door a lot braver than Dongho.
 
"Come in." Kevin replied softly, and there was a yawn following behind, almost inaudible due to the lack of sleep.
 
Eli did as he was told, smiling gently at the childlike image of Kevin wrapped in his blanket like a caterpillar moving onto the pupa stage. "Are you that cold?"
 
The younger boy shook his head, a watery smile flashed at Eli to tell him he had been crying. "My heart is very warm."
 
-
 
Soohyun closed his eyes, unable to fall asleep. Somewhere in between reality and unconsciousness, because his body was so tired as if it went through 48 hours of torture, he remembered Kibum mumbling something three minutes before their performance.
 
"I don't really know if I want to do this once more." Soohyun remembered the pretty boy saying, looking at the stage with worry. "I'm not really sure if this is where I want to start my life again."
 
Soohyun frowned, wondering if that meant he wanted to quit. "Kevin will murder you. And I won't allow you to run away like Dongho did. We only have two more minutes."
 
"Kevin doesn't dare to hold a knife." Kibum snickered, and the seriousness Soohyun felt melted away.
 
-
 
Kibum watched the ceiling of his bed and thought a lot. It was about three in the morning, but the fatigue he felt an hour ago disappeared the moment he remembered the date.
 
He missed Dongho insisting them all exchanging presents as a sort of celebration the day before their debut, and that happened on the second year, and he was actually looking forward to the third year. He missed having nothing to do and then running to Alexander's room to call the motherlike member names just to see the older fume in irritation.
 
It was too quiet in his room, and Kibum tried imagining how it would have been like if they were back in the dormitory they had to be in for the filming of Vampire.

Oh, right. Kevin would want bedtime fairy tales. (Or just the last line, “…and they lived happily ever after.”)
 
-

If Alexander was correct, contrary to how he was recounting their debut in his diary, Kibum would be sleeping the day away.

Kibum didn’t like people to know he was sentimental, that idiot. So just in case Kibum’s mother did knock on his door, she would see a sleeping Kibum, not one that was flipping through albums of photos.

“And because he didn’t want people to worry,” Alexander mumbled while he noted down whatever he wrote. “He would never tell anyone he was afraid of the stage, afraid of the frowns in the crowd, afraid of people who needed a minute to recognise the members of U-KISS. He would bravely step forward with a smile and introduce us all, a leaderlike, confident figure, despite his fears.”

Alexander smiled at Kevin’s tweet for the hundred and twenty third time that morning. “And unfortunately for him, we know him better than that.”

-
 
Kiseop couldn't help but shed a tear.
 
He wasn't even in U-Kiss on the 28th of August, three years ago. Sure, he had been a trainee, been slightly friendly with Soohyun and Kibum, had a small and almost insignificant role in their debut song.
 
Yet for Alexander to wish him a happy anniversary, Kiseop couldn't help himself but to cuddle close to Kevin and whisper his unanswered questions to the younger.
 
"He treats you like you've been with us since forever, because technically, you have." Kevin replied gently, ruffling the slightly older's man hair. "Hyung loved, no, he loves you even till now. Don't think of yourself as someone that's extra, someone added, because you’re not."
 
Soohyun and Eli sat quietly at the side, trusting Kevin to be enough of a comfort when Kiseop suddenly started bawling.
 
Dongho laughed at Kiseop, laughed at Kevin who started crying as well, before slowly letting loose the tears he had been keeping in all day. Kiseop hugged the youngest, bringing him into the middle of the crying mess.

Happy Anniversary.

-

(The road before us has more obstacles than before, more uncertainties than ever. It’s not that hard to just turn back and want to return to what we’re comfortable with, but that would mean we’re stuck behind in our comfort zone. More often than not, the results would never be good, and it’d cause us more harm than we have first felt.

So we need that pull, from someone, or a group of someone, or maybe just a trigger that would force us forward, to see the world before us, to see beyond our pain.

Do not misunderstand. Just because the steps are moving forward, each footprint evident in our hearts, it doesn’t mean the trails we’ve left behind will disappear. We can always take a break and review the past, we can always go back to where we’ve come from, but we need to move forward to explore where this road would lead us to.

Our paths might have crossed during this period, and although we might have to separate from one another and continue walking each of our own way to our destined end, the fact that we can always turn back to see these tracks stay.

Guess what? I left a piece of my heart in the road the seven of us once shared, so there it’d stay. My heart, it stays with the people I call family.)

The man frowned at the words, because it felt as if these words came from a wise old man sitting beside an enormous tree who offers advices to young insolent teenagers who would pass by him.

Alexander grumbled slightly, tearing the wordy page off from his diary and pasting the same piece of paper on his refrigerator. “I can’t believe I just came up with a motivational essay for myself.”

-

I swear, Kevin just makes his way into every part, it wasn’t intentional >__>”