Home - Younha

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21/6/14
 

    Sunny stared at Jessica.
“What?” she looked up. She knew Sunny had been looking at her, but Jessica thought that if she ignored her she would eventually get bored and go away.
“You’ve been coming here less. Same with Taeyeon,” Sunny said.
“…And?” Jessica raised an eyebrow.
“Do you really spend that much time ing?”
“I…I’m not going to dignify that with a response,” Jessica said as she grabbed her things and walked out
“REMEMBER KIDS, USE PROTECTION!” Sunny shouted after her.

    Jessica walked home, almost tempted to walk down to the school, but stopped herself when she realised that Taeyeon wasn’t working today. So she headed home. She could have gone to Taeyeon’s apartment, but it was hot outside and she really just wanted to sleep.

    Upon arriving at her house, she found Taeyeon sitting on her doorstep.
“Taeyeon?”
“Hi! I lost that key that I stole from you, y’know, the one you keep in the back pocket of your pants?” Taeyeon grinned sheepishly. Jessica patted her back pockets, and true enough, she was missing her spare key.
“Jesus Taeyeon. Now I need to get a new one made,” sighed Jessica, as she let the both of them in.
“I’m sorryyy! I’ll get it made! Or I’ll just try to find it again. Either one.”
“You’re such a loser.”
“Hey! I’m not a loser! I’m The Loser.”
“Well…okay. I wasn’t expecting that,” Jessica shuffled around the house, putting her things in order.
“Hey stop moving around and come over here so I can kiss you,” Taeyeon pouted, arms outstretched while she sat on the couch.
“No.”
“Awwwww pleaasseeeee?”
“No.” Jessica had finished arranging her things, and just stood just out of Taeyeon’s reach.
And Taeyeon struck out and quickly grabbed her by the waist before she could react. They both landed on the sofa, squealing, and Jessica was on Taeyeon’s lap as she planted soft kisses all over her face.
“That’s not fair!” Jessica giggled.
“Shhhhh I’m trying to love you.”

    The sounds of water running and a metal teaspoon hitting the insides of a porcelain mug, along with the smell of Jessica’s shampoo and the scent of coffee and Nutella made Taeyeon feel as though nothing could go wrong with this day.

    And then there was a knock at the door.

    Leaving the spoon to lean against the rim of the cup, Taeyeon looked toward the direction of the shower before heading over to the door. Just before she turned the door handle, the visitor knocked again.
“Well there’s no need to be impatient,” she mumbled as she opened the door. “Yes?”
“Je—is this Jessica Jung’s house?” the visitor as a tall young woman, probably in her late twenties. 

Taeyeon had to look up slightly (although she didn’t want to admit it), and she thought that the woman bore a slight (only slight) resemblance to Jessica.
“Um..yes. Are you looking for her?”
“Yeah…who are you?” the stranger asked, glaring slightly at Taeyeon.
“I’m her girlfriend, and hey! I should be asking that question. Who are you?”
“I’m her sister, Kry—WAiT WHAT?! GIRLFRIEND????”
“Sister? Jessica never mentioned a sister.”
“Where is she?” Jessica’s sister asked impatiently.
“She’s having a shower—” Taeyeon stopped at the sound of a hairdryer, “well, was having a shower.”
Without warning, Jessica’s sister pushed past Taeyeon and headed in the direction of the noise.
“Hey! That’s rude! Are you even Jessica’s sister?”

    Jessica ran her finger’s through her wet hair, loosening the knots and staring at the grey bags under her eyes. Before she the hairdryer, she swore she heard Taeyeon and someone else talking, but shrugged it off as nothing. With the hot whirr of the dryer she tilted her head, still looking at her eye bags and looking at the skin on her face which always peeled off after  using any cleanser at all. She put down the hairdryer. As she leant closer to the mirror, the glass fogged up with her breath and she ran her finger over the dried skin.
“Hey! That’s rude! Are you even Jessica’s sister?” she heard Taeyeon say, followed my quick and heavy footsteps approaching the door. Sister? She felt herself freeze as she processed the words.
“Jessica unnie.” She turned around. No no no no they’ve found me. I can’t go back to them. Why are they trying to find me when they never wanted me in the first place? How did she find me.
Pulling herself together, straightened herself and looked straight into her sister’s eyes

“Go home, Krystal. Get out.”
“Mum and dad want you to come home,” Krystal said.
“That’s funny, but I’m not in the mood for jokes. Who told you I lived here?”
“I—I saw you out somewhere and followed you.”
“Do they know I live here?”
“No…”
“Don’t even think about telling them. I will end you.”
“They just want to see you again! It’s been seven years!” Krystal let out an exasperated sigh.
Remembering why she left, Jessica grit her teeth and spat, “do they really want to see me? Or do they just feel powerless because they don’t have control over me any more? Is he just upset because he doesn't have a punching bag anymore? Go to hell.”
“Why can’t you just come home? They miss you! I miss you! Taekwoon oppa’s never at home anymore, I don’t know what either of you are doing! Just come home,” Krystal pleaded, on the verge of tears.
“This is my home. My home is here, with Taeyeon, away from our parents. You know why Taekwoon and I left. It was obvious. Do you think we were happy? Sure maybe you were, maybe you’re satisfied with living a safe life and having everything given to you because you played it safe, because your dreams were acceptable and nobody crushed you, but we didn’t get that, we weren’t good enough,” Jessica softened at the sight of her younger sister tearing up. “Go home, Krystal, they’re waiting for you, you still have a home there.”
“Why isn’t it your home too?” the first tear dropped.
“It stopped being home a long time ago.”

    It was hard to get Krystal to leave. When she closed the door, Jessica let out the heavy sigh she had let stuck in . During their conversation, Taeyeon only stood by and observed. It was not her place to comment on anything. But it was hard not to say anything when Jessica stood and held the doorknob in the same position, unmoving, barely breathing, spaced out and detached from everything. She watched as Jessica’s knuckles turned white and decided to speak up when her hands started to shake and tears rolled down her cheeks.
“Jessica?” Taeyeon asked quietly. When Jessica didn’t respond, Taeyeon gently slipped her arms around her waist and her back gently. She felt Jessica shake and the tears dripped onto her shoulder. Still in embrace, Taeyeon moved away and looked at Jessica worriedly.
“Are you okay?”
“She’s okay. She’s fine. She’s okay,” Jessica whispered shakily.
“Yes, she’s okay, but are you?” Taeyeon asked as she wiped Jessica’s tears away.
“Don’t leave me like I did to her, because I’m selfish, because I can’t do anything for anyone other than myself,” she shook.
“I won’t, you know that.” And Jessica kissed her with such force that she shut her eyes tightly upon impact.
“If you leave I’ll have nowhere else to go.” Jessica’s breath was unstable and ragged, the dripping from her chin like melting ice as her eyes stared into Taeyeon’s frantically, searching desperately for something to hold onto.
“My arms are always open for you. If no one else does, I will always welcome you home.”

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Bbbbbback
I have been
doing things
soz
A lot of stuff has been happening
i think
i may just have been creating problems out of nothing
see i never really know if im having problems bc i think i subconciously do not allow myself to have problems
like
"stop this you dont deserve to have problems and nor do you deserve to be happy"
thats probably not good but w/e
i'll figure it out