My flight was at 10 in the morning and by 9, I was already at the airport with Jake. I said my goodbye to Tia back at the guest house. I immediately checked in my luggage before coming back to Jake. I had a few minutes before my boarding time.

It felt wrong to leave without saying good bye to Kris. I kept searching for him; I kept looking towards tall guys expecting him to be there. I know I should stop hoping, I know I should just give up but I never realised he meant that much to me.

When the first boarding call was announced, I finally saw him, Kris.

Jake handed me a gift and when I asked him what it was and he only said to open it in the plane. He went away to make way for me and Kris to say our goodbye.

I looked towards Kris and felt a sudden pang in my heart. This could be the last time I see him, this could be my last memory of him.

Kris pulled me into a hug, and this embrace feels different than before, “Len, I promise, by the time I come back home, I’ll settle everything. I will. I will be back home and then I will be a better, honest guy for you” Kris whispered.

I couldn’t say anything; I didn’t know what to say.

“I promise. I promise we’ll be better. Call me; e-mail me, like always, please?” Kris pleaded and cupped my cheeks, “I won’t take no for an answer” Kris said and tighten his hold.

Once he let go, I finally nodded. I whispered “Yes”.

 I confess, I couldn’t let Kris go. He meant too much.

On the plane, I open Jake’s gift, it was wrapped in white and when I opened, it was a book, not just any book; it was John Berger’s And Our Faces, My Heart, Brief as Photos.

 I read the note inside;

‘You know how much this book means to me. So, I guess this could be one reason for you to come back to Singapore?’’

I smiled.