I didn’t realize that I have let myself cry. It was also just now that I realized that I was holding my breath. I breathed in deeply and sighed, looking away from him. I breathed in deeply again to calm my heart. I quickly wiped the tears and smiled before looking at him.

“We are friends. Aren’t we?” I chuckled lightly. He was quite taken aback for what I’ve said. He was about to say something when I beat him to it. I sighed loudly before standing up.

“We are friends. Don’t you forget that! Haaay! Where did the guys go?” I said as I look around with a smile.

“I’ll look for them. Wait here, okay? I think you’re too drunk to go out of this room.”

“What…I’m…not drunk” He said slowly, maybe still shocked on how I reacted to what he just said.

He tried to stand up slowly, but bumped his knee on the coffee table in front of the couch. He was about to fall but I caught his arm and stopped him from falling.

“See! You can’t even stand up!” I chuckled at him and pushed him lightly so he can sit.

“No. I can stand up. I just bumped at this--”

“Hephephep! Stop. You stay there.” I cut him off and laughed at him lightly.

“I’ll be back.” I added before I went out of the room without looking back.

I walked quickly to the hall and stopped by the rails before the stairs. I let out the breath I was again holding in. And with that breath, tears also came running down. Why does it hurt so much? Isn’t it a good thing that he wants me to stay by his side? Isn’t it a good thing that he’s still considering our relationship? Doesn’t that mean he wants us to get back together? … But why do I feel this way? Tch. Maybe the alcohol’s acting on me now. Hah!

“Anna? Is that you?” I heard a familiar voice from my right and so I looked.

“It is you! What happened? Why are you crying?” Peniel asked worriedly.

I don’t know why I suddenly felt comfort in seeing him. I let out the heavy feeling I’m keeping inside and just let myself cry. He hugged me tightly upon seeing me break down. I hugged in return as I felt the need to hold onto someone.

“Shh…it’s okay. Just let it out. It’ll be alright.” He comforted me as he pats my head. I hugged him tighter and cried even more.

After I felt calmed again, I realized that I’ve been hugging him tightly for so long. Awkwardness sinks in and I pushed myself away quickly. I felt that he got shocked by my action and I quickly looked down.

I wiped my tears away and looked at him with an embarrassed smile.

“Sorry…” I said, and he just chuckled and messed my hair.

“What happened? Did some drunken guy mess with you? By the way, why were you late? We’ve been trying to call you! Good thing I saw you here.” He said.

“Huh?” I tried to process what he just said and remembered that they’re asking me to come here few hours ago.

“Ah…well…I actually didn’t know you’re here…I’m with--”

“She’s with me.” I heard Taemin said flatly. I suddenly felt a hand wrap around my shoulder and it made me stiff.

“Oh. Annyeonghaseyo.” I saw Peniel’s shocked and confused expression as he greeted Taemin while glancing at me.

I glanced at Taemin and then back to Peniel. Taemin had this stern glare at Peniel, while Peniel keeps glancing at me with awkwardness.

I cleared my throat before I introduced the two.

“I’m with SHINee, actually. I didn’t know this is the club you guys were.” I chuckled awkwardly.

“By the way, I know you two know each other, but I’ll introduce you two anyway. Taemin, this is Peniel of BTOB, his Hyung is my friend from the university. And Peniel, this is Taemin of SHINee, a dear friend.” I actually had a hard time thinking of how I’ll introduce the two. Why is there an awkward atmosphere here?

“Oh! I heard a while ago that it’s your birthday. Happy birthday, hyung!” Peniel said cheerfully as he tries to ease the awkwardness.

But I saw Taemin raise a brow at what he said. Why is that?

“From what I know, you are older, hyung” He chuckled lightly and emphasized on the word ‘hyung’.

I got shocked at his reaction. WTH?!

“Oh, right! Hehe. Sorry, my bad.” Peniel chuckled, with the same arrogance in his tone. What is wrong with these guys?!

The guys are looking at each other’s eyes with intense stares. Gaaah! I don’t want to deal with these guys anymore! Go on and stare at each other for how long you want!

I looked down at the dance floor and saw the rest of the SHINee guys dancing crazily with BTOB and my friends from the university.

“What the hell??! Haha!” I blurted out and laughed loudly in shock upon seeing them all dance wildly.

I think I caught the two guys’ attention as I felt them beside me.

“Oh my! What’s wrong with them? HAHA!” I heard Peniel said.

“Com’on! Let’s join them!” Taemin grabbed my hand and dragged me. I looked at Peniel and motioned him to follow.

We all arrived at the dance floor and entered their circle. We were all welcomed by their loud cheers. We danced happily for about an hour. Suddenly I forgot the awkwardness I felt with the two guys a while ago. At that moment on the dance floor, we were all friends, and we’re all happy. :)

~~

“I have never kissed a guy.”

“Arggg! I hate you Key!”

“I don’t care! SHOT! Haha!”

He pushed the shot in my hand and I took it angrily. They’re all tricking me! Why can’t I win in this game! They are all ganging up on me! Argh!

SHINee, BTOB, Mark, Jinhee, Steph, Jenna, Ivan, and I went up to the VIP room that SHINee reserved after we got tired dancing. Since we started this game, I have never won once! We’re playing this ‘I have never…’ and they are totally ganging on me! They sure know me well and they are always talking about the things that I already did. I have already taken about 10 shots! And I can feel myself getting drunk.

“Next round!” Jjong shouted excitedly.

“I’m out! I can’t do this anymore. You guys go on. I’ll just go out for a while.” I said as I slowly and carefully walked away.

I think everyone’s drunk now that no one even bothered to complain. I walked carefully by the hallway and made my way to the couch near the window. I sat on the couch and opened the window, the cold breeze welcomed me. It was refreshing. I smiled looking at the stars.

But suddenly I felt like crying. I don’t know why. I just felt sad out of nowhere. I didn’t care much and just let my tears flow.

“You’re crying again.” I heard someone at my right and I looked. And just like what happened a while ago, I just cried more.

“Good thing it’s me who saw you now. I don’t like what I saw earlier—you and Peniel hugging.”

Then I suddenly felt anger.

“Tch! Like you haven’t hugged your wife!” I said angrily. I hate you! You don’t want me being with other guys but you can be with her and act like you’re a real couple!

“Go away! Leave me alone!” I said as I look back at the stars.

It was silent for a while. Not until I heard my heart beating fast. It’s that same old feeling, that same warmth.

He’s hugging me tightly from behind, his face’ just a few centimetres away from mine. And I can even feel his heart beating fast.

No one dared to speak. The only thing that’s loud at this moment is my heartbeat. Even the blasting music seems quiet compared to my heartbeat.

“This is my most honest state, Anna.” He suddenly whispered to my ears. I felt chills down my spine.

I don’t know how to react, so I just waited until he says something.

“I love you... I never stopped loving you... I still feel the same.” His voice is so soft and a bit sleepy. And is he crying? I can feel his chest shake and I can also hear him sniff.

“I hate myself for hurting you. For making you feel…for making you feel…cheated…or replaced.” I can hear his soft cries as he hugged me tighter.

And I felt more tears flow down my cheeks. Is this real? Am I dreaming?

“I can’t stand seeing you with other guys. I can’t lose you. I can’t…live without you.

I don’t know if you will remember this tomorrow when you wake up, but still…”

He suddenly made me face him. He kissed me.

~~

He kissed me.

Is this real or is it just a dream?

I realized it’s a dream as I feel the bed I was in. I turned repeatedly with my eyes still shut as I try to sleep again. Argh. Can’t I just stay in that dream?!

I turned again and again until someone stopped me from moving. Someone hugged me from behind and kept me close. I felt a man’s chest touch my back. I got shocked and quickly opened my eyes.

“Can you stop moving? It’s making me dizzy. Argh. My head hearts so much.” I heard a guy’s hoarse voice said. I got more shocked as I recognize the voice.

I quickly moved away and near to the end of the bed. I looked at him with huge eyes, hugging the pillow tightly.

“Argh~ Don’t move too much…” He groaned, covering his eyes with his arms.

And there I realized…

“Yah! Lee Taemin! Why are you in my bed?! ... And why are you topless!” I shouted and throw a pillow in his head.

SURPRISE!! :)

HELLO DEAR READERS!

Did you miss me? 'Cause I missed you! Hehe

This is my early Christmas gift for you guys! Hope you'll like it, though it's just this short :)

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WELCOME, new readers and subscribers!!

Hope you're having fun! :)

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HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!

<3