Gaaah~ Good thing my photographer boss isn’t as wild like the Stefano Lepres on this book! He doesn’t throw tantrums and all. And~ thank God my celebrity friends are not into drugs! Gaaah! I can’t even imagine them sniffing some powder and being high! Pft. That would be hilarious! xD

I looked at the time—tss…4:08 AM—before I locked the screen of my iPad and placed it on the night stand beside my bed.

We arrived at the hotel at around 11PM. My friends and I decided to just sleep immediately since we’ll be up early the next day. But I can’t put myself to sleep ever since I lay down on my bed.

That stare from Taemin kept replaying in my head. It has been on my head since we left TBS, until to our next destination, which is a fashion magazine headquarters, and until we arrived here at the hotel. I wasn’t even able to listen well on our tour guide and eat proper dinner. I had a lot of questions in my head.

Did he really see me? Did he really look at me? Does that stare mean something? Is he really looking at me with longingness? Does he miss me? Does he want me back? …Or is it just my imagination? Did I just interpret it the wrong way? Is it just me, wanting him to look at me that way? …Maybe I’m the one who’s looking at him that way. Maybe I’m the one who’s really longing for him. Maybe I’m the one who misses him…

So to keep my mind away from it, I decided to just read an eBook that I have recently downloaded on my iPad. It took me 3 straight hours to finish the whole book. My eyes hurt after reading so I just closed my eyes and tried to sleep.

But the tiredness I felt in my eyes didn’t help me fall asleep. Frustrated, I got out of bed, got my jacket, and decided to go up on the rooftop.

The rooftop of the hotel is nice, there’s a pool occupying half of the rooftop, a bar, huge speakers, cool lights, and few cottages and benches around. The rooftop, from what I know, is open 24/7.

The rooftop is a bit messy when I arrived. It seems like a party has just ended. There are cups near the pool, empty glasses of wine and cocktails by the bar, lots of barbeque sticks and toothpicks scattered on the floor, and a few of other trashes. The employees cleaning the area looked so tired but they still greeted me nicely and asked me what I want. I decided not to drink any and declined the offer of the bartender.

I sat by the bar and looked at the view of the city. The bar is at the corner of the rooftop, opposite the pool. The one I’m sitting at is at the far end of the bar, just beside the railings of the rooftop. I decided to lean on the railings so I can look at the view comfortably.

The sky is still dark so the lights of the city are still on. There are only few cars passing by but the city still looks alive because of the big LED screens on some of the buildings around. It looks good from my view. It’s picture perfect! I smiled at the thought of capturing this scene through a photo or a video. But I got disappointed when I felt nothing on my pocket. I left my phone. Too bad, this view will only be stored in my memory and will not be materialized. :/

“You’re late. Party’s over.” I heard someone from my back, so I turned to look. I smiled. It’s Mark.

“I didn’t come here for the party. Have you been there all along? I didn’t notice you.” I said.

“I just arrived. I saw you go out of your room. I was curious so I followed you.” He shrugged.

I nodded, and then it was quiet for a while. I was about to look back at the view when I heard him speak.

“So why did you ran away earlier?” I flinched a bit; shocked at what he just said. But I didn’t let him notice it.

“What? When?” I asked innocently.

He chuckled. “Don’t try to deny it. I saw it, Anna. You ran away when you saw SHINee approaching.” He looked at me knowingly.

I sighed and smiled. But I didn’t say anything.

“Looks like you still haven’t fixed your problem. You know you should talk to them. I was actually tempted to tell them that I know your relationship, but I just can’t because there are fans around, namely our friends.” We chuckled at his last statement. He continued.

“I actually don’t know the real reason why you had that problem with them. You know…I never asked, and you never told me. But I’m not asking you to tell it to me!” He said defensively.

I sighed and leaned on the counter, looking at the glasses at the back side of the bar, I started to talk.

“Do you know that feeling when you know you trust someone, you really, really trust that someone, but everything that’s happening around seems to debunk that idea? You trust him, you want to trust him, but then all his actions made you doubt so much. Then that one last strand of hope that your doubts with him are not true breaks in an unexpected manner. You’re not prepared for it that you have said all the things you’ve been keeping to yourself. You felt embarrass even if you didn’t do anything embarrassing. I ran away not because I was angry, well, maybe that’s a part but it’s not the main reason. I ran away because I felt disappointed with myself that I let that happen. I was disappointed that I was not able to keep him by my side. I was disappointed that I let him doubt his feelings for me. I was disappointed that I also doubted him and our relationship.” I said blankly. I suddenly realized that I have said so much nonsense that I looked at him in shock.

“I’m sorry! Forget all about that! That’s just pure nonsense! Ha-ha!” I said quickly and nervously.

To my surprise, he patted my head. Like saying he understands me and that what I am feeling is not wrong. I felt calmer after that simple act. We smiled at each other.

“Trust is a very complicated thing. Sometimes you think you already trust someone, but in fact deep inside you have so much doubt. Sometimes you think that you don’t trust someone, but unconsciously, you have already depended your life on them. Sometimes trust is just a battle within yourself; sometimes it doesn’t even concern the person you give your trust to.” He chuckled. “Sorry, that doesn’t make sense.”

I also chuckled. I thought about what he said. It confuses me, but in a way I think I understand what he wants to say.

“But seriously…” He continued “You should have a talk. And don’t worry if it still didn’t go well between the two of you, my brother is still available! I still ship the two of you! Haha!” That just earned him a punch in the arm.

I thought that issue died a month ago! Haha! This guy! :)

“You know, you really look better when you’re smiling. The sad face doesn’t go well with your image. Cut the dramatic feel! Be the happy-go-lucky girl again!” He said as he pinches my cheeks. And that earned him another hit on the arm.

We realized that the sky is starting to light up. He looked at his watch and said that it was already 6AM. We decided to go back to our rooms before the sun rises. I actually want to see the sunrise here because I think it would look pretty, but I still agreed. I don’t want my roommates to wake up without me on the bed.

We arrived at the hall of our rooms. We arrived at the front of my room and Mark waited until I get inside. But before I open the door, I decided to thank him for accompanying me.

“Thank you for being a good friend, Mark.” I said with a smile. He nodded and smiled too.

“I’ll see you later.” I said.

He nodded. I was about to turn the knob when he pulled me into a hug. I was shocked, but I still hugged him back. It was a nice and comfortable feeling. It was different. We’ve hugged before, every time we see each other and say goodbye to each other, just like normal friends. But this time it felt different, like it was from a protective brother.

 I pulled away when I felt that we’ve been hugging for a while now. I smiled again before I went inside my room.

Hello lovely readers! :)

I updated! Horaaaay! haha!

Again, I decided to do this rather than doing my school wwork! How cool is that?! xD

Anyways, hope you enjoy this chapter. Though nothing much happened. Haha.

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Have a nice day!

<3