Back to school and all I can say is I’m still not over him yet my feelings turned cold as ice. I am numb from the pain. But I am not going to give up, I’ll love him as long as I can.

My classmates are laughing, sharing their precious vacation moments and here’s me… Contemplating all the stupid things I’ve done. I celebrated New Year’s Eve with Kris. And I wasn’t aware that my pops had to go back to work and I wasn’t able to say good bye. Maybe it happened because my face was really swollen and red like it was stung from a bee. And pops will worry, I’m sure. The scent of trees, the snow under our shoes, the breeze, and the colorful lights in the sky. He’s comfortable to be with. I shared my thoughts with him, and he listened and he understands. He made me happy even if it was just a moment, I really am thankful.

“Hey.” Juniel came from nowhere.

“Why?” I asked, focusing on Luhan’s vacant seat.

“You’re not you today. Even if you stare at his seat for like…. Forever, he won’t show up for you.”

Those words stab me in the heart.

“I’m sorry, okay? I love him.”

“Maybe it’s because you’re too nice to him. That’s why he took you for granted. You know, boys do like girls with a little bit of attitude.” She said while combing her bangs.

“What? So you mean, I should’ve been a ?” I shriek.

“There’s a thin line between having an attitude and being a . Come with me when school’s over. Ciao!” she bade goodbye and winked at me like she has a plan of some sort.

--

Class dismissed. Juniel forced me to go with her to the mall. She’s crazy. I mean, she spent a lot of money buying clothes and make ups and this haul is no joke.

“Do you wear make up?” she asks, observing my face.

“Chap stick and face powder and since it’s winter, I always use a moisturizer.”

“You’re boring.” She started making faces.

“Yeah?”

She grabbed my hand and went to a stall of make up and other girly things. I didn’t know that there are a lot of kinds of make up. She grabbed liquid foundation, concealer, primer, bronzer, eyeshadow, blush, mascara, eyeliner, beauty blender, etc. I didn’t know that she’s into make up.

I tapped her shoulder and whispered “I don’t have enough money to buy those. So let’s get out of here.”

“My treat.” She smirked.

After make up, we went to the department store and she grabbed pieces of clothes without looking at it. She just grab it and will ask me to try it. She said that I should be bolder and more like gothic.

From makeup to clothes to shoes. I got these for free. She used her own savings. She is so generous.

We went to their house and she taught me how to use those things and she gave me steps on how to be an annoying type of girl but beautiful at the same time.

“Number 1: Don’t just follow your heart. Follow your heart and take your brain with you. Just because he said you’re pretty, doesn’t mean he loves you.

Number 2: Make him WANT YOU BACK but you’ll ignore him.

Number 3: If he asks you to come back, Let him do all the work.

Number 4: Respect yourself! It’s a big yes and number 5, Don’t forget your goal. Your goal is to see if he’s sincere. Don’t overdo it or else you’ll end up hurting someone and always remember that if he doesn’t deserve you, then let go. You’re a princess, don’t settle for less.”

Maybe she’s right. I thanked her for everything and I will do all this starting tomorrow. I hope that this plan will work.