'You're joking right now, aren't you?' Ryeowook said as he sank onto the chair next to the hospital bed feeling completely defeated.

'I mean, I would have known. I always know.' He let out a shaky breath as he uttered this.

'But then again I fail to notice the issue with Heechul hyung so who am I to say such a thing?' He began to play with the hem of his shirt.

'You're just a person.' Kyuhyun responded as he looked at the worried face of his best friend.

'I didn't know either until I'm stuck in this state.'

'I just can't believe it.' Ryeowook rubbed his temple, feeling stress getting to him at the new found information.

'It's just too hard..it's just...surreal...'

'If it makes you feel better, I almost had a nervous breakdown when I first found out.' Kyuhyun admitted honestly as he move around the hospital room.

'Before everything..turns the way they are now..I wouldn't have been able to ever picture something like this happening to our members...Sungmin hyung...kibum...'

'What do we do know Kyu?' Ryeowook asked almost desperately.

'Where do we even begin?'

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Leeteuk heard the front door being pushed open so he dropped the cup he was holding onto the table and headed out the kitchen to see who it was. Once he reached the living room, he could see some of the members laying around the couch and on the floor. He turned his eyes towards the small hallway leading towards the front door.

'Where have you been?' Leeteuk asked the man who walked pass the living room. He was leaning against the wall as he look at the other with observant eyes. His voice caught the attention of the other members as they turned to look his way.

'To see a friend.' The man replied merely avoiding the gaze that was following him around. He wanted to get to his room as quickly as possible without being bombarded by too much questions.

'Is something bothering you Kibum?' Leeteuk asked as he crossed his arms together. He knew better than anyone when his each and every members are lying.

'You don't look so good these days. You're getting paler and thinner.'

'I'm fine hyung. Really I am.' Kibum lied as he tried to escape to his room.

'Since when do you spoiled kids learn to lie to me?!' Leeteuk snapped. He was angry. No. He was extremely furious. He was the leader of this group but it seemed that nowadays he had been contanstly lied to by s and it was the last call for his nerve when Kibum also decide to lie him.

'Hyung don't get mad, Kibum is just tried.' Eunhyuk who read the atmosphere well uttered as he quickly grabbed Kibum by the shoulder.

'He's not lying, he's just tired aren't you kibummie?' He began to massaged the younger man's shoulders.

' this.' Leeteuk hissed as he turned around and went inside the kitchen. After a few seconds, he came back out with a cup in his hands. He looked at the members with a look that made them so scared they didn't dare move or say anything.

'This is what happens when you people decide to tell me not !' Leeteuk grutted his teeth and blurted out.

'You ing do whatever you like without thinking clearly, you ing do business with the wrong people, you ing get in trouble with the cops, you ing make a mess to this ing group and you ing make a mess out of my ing life!!' He yelled out, releasing all the anger he had kept inside him ever since everything started.

'Well of course you do these things right? Cuz in the end it's not you who gets crap from the company. It's not you being yelled at and blamed! It's not ING YOU!!!' Leeteuk was shaking due to so much anger that he sank onto the floor, defeated.

'Hyung...' Shindong who was sitting on the couch with Donghae, Hangeng, Yesung and Sungmin stood up and carefully approach their distorted leader.

'Please calm down.' He grabbed a hold of Leeteuk's shoulders and hugged him slowly. Surprisingly, Leeteuk said nothing as he burst into tears.

'Why don't you tell me these things...why can't you tell me these things...' Leeteuk tried to say in between sobs. He was holding Shindong tightly, looking for the comfort he so desperately needed. He had finally lost. Completely defeated. He could no longer play the tough leader wrong and act like everything is under control. He was just human after all and reality is hard and painful. It's cruel.

'...you're supposed to tell me these things....what am I...what am I going to do if you won't tell me...Heechul...Kyuhyunnie...and the Siwon...and now you, Kibummie...I can't...I just....'

Shindong heart broke into gazzilion pieces as he hugged their leader even tighter. This was the first time he saw Leeteuk so defeated and so broken. The stress of the group was too much for the older man and Shindong felt guilty for not helping him from the very beginning because he was too caught up with his own anger and disappointments to notice. He was sure the same goes for the other members as he saw them approaching Leeteuk with tears all over their faces including Kibum.

'Hyung...we're so sorry...it'll be okay hyung...please don't cry anymore....'

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Siwon wandered around the streets of Seoul looking for the address he was sent. He was having a hard time because he had never been to this place before. Heck, he didn't even know that such place existed. After spending so much time looking, he finally found the place. He quickly went inside as he pulled down his head and pulled out his sunglasses and mask to avoid being recognize by the public. It was one of the downfalls of being someone famous after all.

'We need to turn ourselves in.' Siwon looked at the man sitting in front of him with wide eyes.

'What are you talking about, don't be ridiculous hyung! We did nothing wrong!' Siwon tried to control the volume of his voice but was failing.

'It's not our fault.'

'Geez would you stop living in your ing dream Choi Siwon!' Heechul snapped and slammed his fist to the table.

'It is our fault, we started this !' He then ruffled his hair furiously and leaned back against his chair.

'We even got Kyuhyun involved Kyuhyun!'

'Okay fine we may start all this but what happened that was wasn't our fault, we were being targetted by them!' Siwon let out a frustrated gasps as he uttered this.

'They planned all this and made us get into trouble with the cops.'

'We should have never entangled ourselves with them Siwon.' Heechul sighed and uttered sadly.

'We shouldn't have played with fire when we don't know how to extinguish them properly.'

'But turning ourselves to the cops...hyung! That...that would destroy everything!' Siwon tried to change Heechul's mind. He was scared of going too jail. He was terrified.

'We already destroyed everything Siwon.' Heechul looked at the younger man sternly.

'We've destroyed ourselves, our family and importantly, we've destroyed Super Junior, our brothers. Why did you had to take those drugs Siwon? And why'd you let Kyuhyun get involved in it too? I tried my best to cover for you and look at how that turned me into. I am the public enemy now.'

'So you're regretting your decision for helping me then?' Siwon cried out angrily. Apart of him knew how true Heechul's words were but another part of him wanted to defend himself. Wanted to run away and not admitting to his mistakes.

'You're saying that it's all my fault now?!'

'That's not it Siwon and you know that.' Heechul tried to explain.

'I am also guilty for agreeing with your idea of getting us sponsors. It was my own choice not yours.I was selfish. I wanted more than the name of Super Junior. So were you. I didn't know we would get involved with the wrong people and the wrong crowd. We're both guilty Siwon. And now is the time for us to admit it. We're causing so much trouble for the company, for our family and importantly, for our Super Junior, our brothers. I know it's hard but it's time for us to admit our mistake Siwon.'

'That drug is not mine and you know that! I'm not admitting to anything!' Siwon stood up and yelled out with so much anger as he stared into Heechul's eyes.

'I was forced to do it! It was not my choice!' He greeted his teeth and balled out bot his hands.

'And about the members who ing cares about them! Brothers?!! We stopped being brothers a long time ago for all I could remember. All everybody could think of now is how to make their own-self more famous and get more jobs! We're all guilty of being selfish it's not just me!'

'I KNOW THAT SIWON BUT KYUHYUN ALMOST DIED FOR WHAT WE DID!!' Heechul couldn't take anymore from Siwon and punched him sending him flying to the floor.

'DON'T YOU SEE? WE STARTED ALL THIS AND WE HAVE TO END IT NOW!!!' Heechul get down to his knees near Siwon and grabbed his collar.

'Yes the drugs were not yours nor mine but they people it belongs to are the people that got us into these whole mess. I know you're scared but the police will investigate and find proof that those drugs were not ours. We need to clean this Siwon. Our names and Super Junior's name. We need to fix what's been broken between us if that's what it takes to make things better again. We need to stop hurting them, hurting each other. We need to stop hurting ourselves!'

'Reality Siwon! It's cruel!'

Heechul let go of the younger man's collar when he felt his body trembling.

'Siwon?'

'Hyung...I'm so scared...I just..I just don't know what to do...' Siwon finally admitted. 'I hate what I have become. I'm monster hyung.'

-----------------------

Ryeowook waited outside the door of the toiler quietly, waiting for his courage to sink in. He didn't know what he was going to do and how he was going to do it but he was determined to fix whatever he was capable of. Ryeowook knew that Kyuhyun was somewhere around the area looking over him but he didn't want to have consersation with the other. That would just throw of every little courage he has within him. Plus, Kyuhyun also knew better that, that was the kind of person Ryeowook is so he didn't initiate any conversation to the smaller man. After what seemed like forever, Ryeowook finally entered the toilet and towards the cubicle at the farthest end of the toilet. He was feeling scared but this needed to be done. Reality is cruel but this was important.

'Sungmin hyung.'

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