[That the farewell poison has already]
[Without knowing, spread in my heart]
[The disease where my love is slowly dying]
[It hurts a little, but I don't want to get better]
[Every single memory is erasing]
[Going back to the times when we were strangers]
[I want to rest now]

Sungmin quietly went out of the office to go for his coffee break. He chuckled when he closed the door. The music in the lobby is the
song he wrote not so long time ago...

-------POV 4 YEARS AGO--------

Kyuhyun found Sungmin sitting at the side of his dorm. After his dad's wake, Kyuhyun took the small amount of money left for his
college. He didn't use it for school. He applied scholarship like Sungmin's and was granted easily. He saved the money for future
use and decided to just stay in an old dorm. He needs to live a simple life. Thanks to his bestfriend who has always been there, things
that seemed too complicated is easier than he ever thought.

Sungmin was in a crouching position outside the door, his head down. He didn't know he has fallen asleep as he waits for his friend.
Kyuhyun squat down and tapped him on his shoulder.

"Ming~" he called gently. Sungmin slowly raised his head but avoided Kyuhyun's look.

"What took you so long?" Sungmin asked. His mouth pouted and his eyes a little bit upset that he has to wait. He immediately came
in Kyuhyun's place since the class has ended. Now the sun is gone and its already nighttime.

"I walked Ryeong home."

"Oh." he pursed his lips and looked down immediately understanding it.

Of course he's not the first priority anymore. He needs to remember he was the one who pressed Kyuhyun to date their friend. Now
he's not the one Kyuhyun is waiting for after dismissal. He won't be the first anymore. He shouldn't be upset with it because it
happened to Kyuhyun too. Although he's not really used to being not the first priority in Kyuhyun's list. Whenever he would call the
other, Kyuhyun would always arrive as soon as possible.

"How is it going with Ryeong?" he asked trying to make his voice a little interested. It's been a year anyway.

Kyuhyun shrugged his shoulders. "We're good. I think I like him." he nodded his head, convinced that indeed he likes Ryeowook. It's
been a year and its not a short time to learn how Ryeowook can also be sarcastic with his reply and how witty he sounds out of nowhere.

Sungmin just nodded and sighed heavily. Kyuhyun knows what a heavy sigh is. "Ming, is everything ok?" Sungmin doesn't sigh if he's
not bothered or anything.

Sungmin pouted. "I broke up with Youngwoon hyung." he said. Kyuhyun was surprised to hear it. He didn't expect it. Not now. What
happened? His eyebrows crossed.

"W-why? I thought you're doing well with him?" he stood up and help his friend to stand as well. "Come here." he said as he assisted
his friend and let him in the dorm. He doesn't have anyone here yet so the place is basically his own for now. He held Sungmin's face
once they were inside. No wonder his friend looked so down.

"What happened? Did he cheat on you? Did he hurt you? Tell me what happened." his voice is gentle to Sungmin's ear. He looked up and
met Kyuhyun's eyes who is waiting for an answer. Kyuhyun's hair has grown a little longer now. He hasn't been reminding the other to
go for a haircut. How long has he not been together with Kyuhyun?

"Love disease came up to me." Sungmin said. He shrugged his shoulder shortly. "I guess."

"What? What love disease? What do you mean?"

Sungmin closed his eyes. "I don't know, Kyuhyun. I woke up one morning and suddenly everything is gone. It's just wasn't there
anymore. It changed in snap."

"What changed?"

Sungmin bit his lower lip and eyed on his bestfriend. "I suddenly felt its not right to be with him anymore. Every excitement, every
feelings...everything. It was all gone. I just feel sorry that I'm feeling this so I broke up with him. I mean, I can't be with him
if I'm not feeling the same and-" a deep sigh.

Sungmin sounded frustrated. What could have pushed the feelings away? Kyuhyun shook his head. He hasn't been paying attention to his
friend these days. He felt sorry for him. He should have known he's been feeling like this lately.

"Come here."

He pulled Sungmin close to him and put him in an embrace. "It's ok, Ming. I'm still here." Sungmin embraced Kyuhyun tightly as well.
It always feels good whenever they embrace. It's not even hard to feel better because Kyuhyun is just here. Being in his embrace is
no longer a stranger to Sungmin, he has enjoyed this for as long as he can remember and the feeling doesn't change. Even when he
once had Youngwoon, even if Kyuhyun has Ryeowook, the feeling of being in each other's arms didn't change at all. His bestfriend loves
him and so does he to his bestfriend. He likes this feelings always.

"Thanks, Kyung. You're the best."

He knows seeing Kyung and hearing those words I'm still here, would make him feel better. And he really does. He doesn't know when
he started losing his feelings for Youngwoon but he's quite sure he didn't really see them being together for a long time anyway.
Why is it so? He had seen his life with Kyuhyun as his bestfriend. He had seen himself getting old with Kyuhyun just right there by
his side... but why didn't he see himself lasting long with Youngwoon?

Sungmin looked up and met Kyuhyun's eyes. "I miss you." the latter smiled and pat him on the head before kissing him quickly and
casually on the lips. They had kissed in the lips anyway. He gave his first kiss to Kyuhyun and this kiss won't be with anything
other than a bestfriend's kiss. It's no big deal. Sungmin smiled widely at him. Youngwoon's kisses had been rough and bitter before
he realised that the feeling is gone. But Kyuhyun's kiss is still as sweet as his caramel sundaes. Maybe a bestfriend's kiss doesn't
change afterall.

"Silly." Kyuhyun said and wrapped his arms around Sungmin again.

It feels good to have Sungmin in his arms again. Ryeowook has always been hugging him and his thin frame can be too fragile for Kyuhyun
to hug tightly. Sungmin's body has a little bit more 'meat' so to speak. He's cuddly and his smell is always a very good scent for
him. The kiss is too quick unlike the first that they shared but he's glad that the taste is still different from the others.

---------------------------------

"Love Disease?" Ryeowook asked. Kyuhyun nodded with his mouth slightly pouted. "What's that?" The other asked. They were walking around,
Ryeowook's arm hooked around Kyuhyun's. They like this kind of date where they will be together and walk around. It's better like this
than to sit down and talk about nothing. It bores both of them. If they are walking like this at least they can see something that
they can talk about. Right now, Kyuhyun told his boyfriend about what happened last night.

"You mean, the feeling just disappeared?" Kyuhyun nodded while Ryeowook got somehow confused. Is it even possible? When you love
someone you just love him, right? If it changed or disappeared easily...then it probably isn't love. Because love should always be
permanent. Even when you break up with someone; memories of whatever things and feelings you've shared will make you say I loved this
person. Love shouldn't disappear; its just that when you met another person. the feeling is stronger than the previous one. But if
it disappear just like that... maybe love didn't really exist at all. Is it possible that maybe Sungmin didn't really love Youngwoon hyung?

"Ming felt sorry for suddenly feeling this but he thought it's best like this so they can move on immediately than let himself be
choked by Youngwoon and the latter expecting him to be loved in return. He wants Youngwoon to be happy too so he broke up with him so
Youngwoon hyung can find a new love." Ryeowook nodded. That's right. Break up to find a new love. That's very practical. You can
always say it's better to end now so that you can find someone new, someone who can make you happier than I ever did to you... but
what about the abandoned one? Shouldn't he be keeping grudge to the one who left him? What if Sungmin is the only one who can make
Youngwoon happy? Besides, after all the feelings and time and emotions he had invested...at the end Sungmin just let the feeling
disappear. Isn't that painful? Does he expect Youngwoon to immediately find another one?

"Kyuhyun, if you're feeling that disease, you have to tell me so we can do something about it."

Kyuhyun looked at Ryeowook, dumbfounded. Why would he even care about it? It's not like they will be together for the rest of their
lives...right? Well, yes they are together now, but Kyuhyun is quite sure they won't end up together forever. He doesn't know why but
he guessed everyone has that 'it' feeling when you finally found the right one. Ryeowook just smiled at him and rested his head on
the other's arm as they walk.

There are different kinds of love disease. One, a disease when the love just disappear in a snap, like Sungmin's. Two, a disease where you
want to be in the other's world to the point of pushing yourself in, just like Youngwoon's. Three, a disease where you hope to cure every kind of love disease to last forever with the person you love, just like Ryeowook's. A love disease that is stuck in silence and chokes the heart because he
cannot say it out loud, like Hyukjae's and finally, a love that has always been so special that it has become the norm for each other  and fail to notice
that it is afterall, special. Love is afterall a complicated disease that everyone would want to have.

------------END OF POV-------------

Sungmin looked at his mobile. Kyuhyun hasn't even been messaging him today. What happened to him? He's probably busy taking care of
him. It's been three years... but...

He sighed. What can he do? Kyuhyun still blames himself for what happened to Ryeowook. Guess, he'll never really feel better until
the other wakes up.

Sungmin almost jumped to his shock when Hyukjae's arm suddenly landed on his shoulder. A glanced at his friend. "You were late
so I deserve some coffee." Hyukjae said. Sungmin was about to protest when the other pointed at him. "And please buy yourself an
underwear. I think you're not wearing one."

Sungmin glared at him but blush with the thought that Hyukjae noticed it. He shook his head and started walking. Hyukjae removed his
arm around his friend and dust his own clothes awkwardly. Sungmin looked at him with questioning eyes. What now? "You didn't really
change your clothes since yesterday, I don't want to have your body odour." Hyukjae said.

Sungmin hit him hard on the arm. "Yah Lee Hyukjae, don't over do it! I showered in the morning and I make sure, my clothes are clean
before I wear it back today!"

"Yeah, yeah... you still have the caramel stain on it, what makes you think it's clean?"

Well for one, he didn't use it when he was asleep. He's quite sure there is no drool in it whatsoever. Second, he doesn't need clothes
when sleeping with Kyuhyun because they sleep together. Come on, you don't really wear anything when you're having some y
time with anyone, right?

He didn't bother answering anymore. He started walking forward and let Hyukjae followed up to him. His friend is right, he needs to
get himself at least a cheap underwear to last the day. He wouldn't want his manhood to dangle around his legs and bulge too obviously
right before everyone.

--------------------------

They sat inside a small coffee shop while Hyukjae was the one who took both of their orders. Sungmin was in dazed outside watching
people who randomly walk in front of the glass window of the shop. He sighed deeply. What could Kyuhyun be doing now? He looked down.
It would have been better if Ryeowook opens his eyes now and tell them that he's fine.

"Tah... caramel ice blended with whip cream." Hyukjae said as he passed the cold drink to his friend. Sungmin smiled at him trying to
shake his thoughts off. Hyukjae sat in front of him and rubbed his palms together and do his ritual with his coffee.

Sungmin watched him as he carefully stirs his coffee after putting the sugar in it. Things have changed between them. But not at all.
Hyukjae is still here with him despite what has happened three years ago. They casually drink coffee together, they still share
dirty jokes with each other, they still care for each other.

"You know... I kind of know I've been looking good recently but please..." Hyukjae said as he eyed on Sungmin. "After being rejected
by you, I'm quite sure I don't like you in that way anymore." he smirked on his friend who crossed his eyebrows wondering what he
is saying. "You have to get in the line if you want to have me."

"Tss..." Sungmin smiled while rolling his eyes. "You know... you still amuse me with that confidence of yours."

"Why?"

"You really think you're good looking?" Sungmin asked as he opened the cap of his drink and used the straw to get the whip cream.

"I am good looking, Min. You just don't use contacts."

Sungmin widened his smile and just shook his head. Yeah, he cannot deny that Hyukjae has been really looking better than when they
were still in college and that his appeal is really exceeding a fan girl's dream but please. This is Lee Hyukjae. The dorkiest,
funniest and least goodlooking member of The Rookies. He could just chuckle at how Hyukjae carries and believes himself to be good
looking. Well maybe he is. Because of his talent in song writing, because of his passion in work, because of his soft heart... that's
what makes him beyond handsome. But physically...err...yet let's just move on.

"Hyukkie... can I ask Kyuhyun to sing that song?" he asked immediately changing the mood. Hyukjae straightened up and he clenched
his jaws upon pausing his stirring. He doesn't really like talking about Kyuhyun. Why is Sungmin even insisting of having him as the
company's singer. He doesn't want to have anything to do with this man anymore.

"Don't ask me such questions because you know my answer."

Sungmin looked down. Of course he does. He sighed deeply and placed the cap of his drink back after finishing the whip cream. He
placed the straw back and sipped on his drink. Hyukjae still refuse to deal with Kyuhyun. Hyukjae sighed and hoped that the conversation
about Kyuhyun is done.

"How's Ryeong?" Hyukjae asked as he stirs his coffee again. He needs to break the awkward silence because Sungmin is plain upsetting
for bringing up topics about Kyuhyun and work.

"Still the same."

Hyukjae eyed on him and just saw the desperation in Sungmin's eyes. He looked down and they both know they recalled what happened in
that hospital three years back. He closed his eyes trying to avoid the glimpse of tears and cries that he heard and had with his
friends. It was a horrible time for everyone. It was a nightmare. A past that nobody would want to look back at. Hyukjae opened his
eyes and shook his head. No, he wouldn't want to recall the reason why he's not friends with Kyuhyun anymore. He doesn't want to bring
anything from the past anymore. However, when he opened his eyes, he immediately saw Sungmin, his mouth in his straw, sipping the
cold sweet treat in front of him. Why, of all people in the past, can't he let go of this person? His heart is still aching for
Sungmin... the person he can never have.

-----------------------------------

Hyukjae wanted some take away from the coffee shop so he went to the counter for a while. Sungmin eyed on his phone again. Kyuhyun
isn't really going to call him.

-----------------------------------

Kyuhyun looked at his phone for a long time. He was in deep thought after he visited Ryeowook in the hospital. He's tired although
he freed himself from all his activity for the day. The other is still in his deep sleep. Is Ryeowook dreaming? Is Ryeowook hearing
all his stories? Kyuhyun has a lot of thought in his mind like questions such as when is Ryeowook waking up? Why is he still asleep?
What's taking his journey so long? He misses Sungmin today. Should he see Sungmin today? He looked down and remembered what Sungmin said this morning.

I'm thinking of moving in here. What do you think?

He thought for a while before deciding to dial Sungmin's number.

-----------------------------------

A ring startled Sungmin's daze. He turned to Hyukjae who is still in the counter. A smile and immediately, he placed the phone
against his ear. He didn't expect a call. Well... he does... who is he kidding anyway?

"Hello?" Sungmin asked biting his lips to at least hide his excitement. No, its not new that Kyuhyun doesn't call him or message him
often but even so he always wait for the other to call him. He likes pretending Kyuhyun is going to call him soon. He likes checking
on his phone to see if he has any message or anything. He really likes hearing and listening to Kyuhyun's voice over the phone. He
likes expecting Kyuhyun reaching for him. It's just him.

"It's me." of course it's you. "Are you free tonight?"

"Tonight?" Sungmin looked at his watch pretending he is thinking. "Yes, I'm free tonight."

"Can you meet me at the train station?"

"Sure. Be there at 7?"

"Ok."

Sungmin bit his lower lip and smiled. Kyuhyun called him to meet up. What can be more exciting than that? Since that time, Kyuhyun
isn't really the type who has been vocal to what he feel. Often times, Sungmin would be guessing about what he is thinking about and
he wouldn't really know what exactly is on the other's head. Sungmin took his bag and started standing up. He took his phone and
messaged Hyukjae.

Sender: Miniming
Message:
[I'm leaving. Won't come back anymore. Got an appointment.
PS: Call Jay hyung, he'll do well for the song^^]

He left the other inside the coffee shop but he stopped from walking. A reply made him chuckle quite loudly on his own.

Sender: Hyukkiejae
Message:
[Go home and get some spare clothes!]

He looked from outside the coffee shop and saw Hyukjae watching him. He waved his hands shortly and started running away. Hyukjae
could just sigh and shook his head. He turned to the counter and got his strawberry buns. "Can you cancel the caramel cake?" he asked.

It's still him. The one who is always left behind. The one who cannot get inside Sungmin's bubble. The one who will always be rejected.
And yet, despite the pain, he still cannot deny himself the truth that he is still in love with the person who treats him as nothing
but his closest friend.

---------------------

*Author's Note: I am so proud of myself
when I read all your comments. hahaha...
Thanks for being curious and anxious to know
everything... here's a clue from your beloved author...

NOTHING >P *i'm not called evil author for nothing.*

Song: Love Disease
Performed by: Super Junior
Album: Sorry Sorry
I have a lot of love for this song and promised that I will
use it for my fanfic. It's quite a cameo though haha... but
i still like it.

PS: Friends with benefits? You really think so? hmm~~