"Why" I ask, sounding desperate. If I was asking my mother or simply just asking myself, I didn’t know for sure. Not bothering to remove my shoes I walk to the bottom of the staircase leading to my room and collapse onto the bottom step. I bury my face in my hands and try to keep the angry tears from spilling. Silence fills the room and I raise my head to look at my mother, waiting for whatever excuse she was about to give me, the lie she was about to tell me.

"Jonghyun" she said and then paused as if to reconsider her words. "I know you like it here but we know it's not…safe for you an-" I cut her off with the look I gave her at the word 'safe'. "Someone attacked me in the last place we lived so we move here, that repeats itself so we shift again?" I ask with both anger and mockery clear in my voice.

"My life finally seemed to be going MY way for once and now I have to give it all up", this was more a statement then it was a question. My mother chose to remain silent and let me go on but I had nothing more to say. I had just found something worth keeping and now I had to let it go.

I let my gaze fall to the floor as I ticked my shoes off wondering if my life was just a stupid book that took a turn as and when the author pleased. "I am in the middle of my third year of high school, cant we wait till the year is over?" I ask, a last and futile attempt to give her a reason to stay back.

"Jonghyun" she said, concern and love in her voice as she came to sit next to me. "I know you're scared and confused but as your mother I care for your safety and for that we have to shift", her hands were reaching out to hold mine but I flinch at her words and draw my hand away from hers as I stand up.

"But you're not, are you?" I whisper to myself. "Wha-what are you talking about Jonggie?" she asks, her face a mask of pure horror. "You're not my mother. I am not your child. We are not a family because if we were, why isn’t there a single picture from my birth or even a wedding picture? Why don’t we go for any events together or meet any other relatives?" the words just keep spilling from my mouth and the questions I have held back for as long as I can remember make more sense now as I ask them to the person sitting next to me.

Tears fill the eyes of the women I called my mother for 6 years and my heart starts to ache but my mind demands me to stay emotionless. Without anything left to be said I walk up to my room, let the door slam behind me and with my back against it I slump to the floor and let a tear fall. 

I decided to give up dinner and just go to sleep. I figured it was better to avoid my parents for the time being anyway but this just left me with a lot of time to myself. A part of me was glad I had gotten to say what was on my mind for so long and another part of me was saddened by the hurt it caused my mother. She had taken care of me since I was 13 and she did what every other mother did; she yelled at me for not cleaning up after myself, for not studying, for coming home late and she even comforted me when I was sad. All these thoughts bring a small smile to my face and I instantly wish she would have denied my claims since her silence was the only true thing that gave her away to my accusations.

Trying to shift my attention to another topic my hand unconsciously reaches to touch my lips at the thought of the kiss I shared with Jinki. 'Did he kiss me because he knew I was going to be leaving soon?' I wonder. 'Or..or does he really like me back?'. I was unsure but I preferred to think it was the latter. His tight embrace and soft pink lips seemed to convey pure, loving and warm emotions like his smile. The thought of it all made my cheeks burn red as the blood rushed to it, a smile lit my face to match the joy I felt and with those thoughts I feel asleep.

"Kim Jonghyun" called a loud voice I was so used to. "How could you fall asleep in your uniform?" she questioned. Slowly I open my eyes and see my mother glaring angrily at me. "Get up now and go take a bath. I expect to see you down for breakfast in 20 minutes tops" she contin