So tell me...

If I Could Change Time... (Side story: SooSica)

 

Treading with light steps, Jessica walked to school the next day. The events from yesterday has somewhat stripped her of her fear for thunder. Instead, she smiled thinking about how Sooyoung had helped her shed off that very fear of hers. It didn't mean Jessica wouldn't flinch in the face of thunder, but just having Sooyoung in her mind was more than comforting. 

On the other side, Sooyoung found herself walking to school more cheerful than ever. After Jessica's arrival, Sooyoung soon found herself putting away her dread of going to school and even looked forward to it. With yesterday's events, she felt that it was safe to assume that Jessica and her were close. Sooyoung went to school with her heart full of anticipation, wanting to see Jessica once again. 

"Should I ask her out for lunch?" Sooyoung debated her choices.

"Maybe she'll prefer if I ask her out after school." she talked to herself with glee.

Sooyoung then saw Jessica a distance away from her. She immediately picked up her pace and caught up to the american girl. 

"Annyeong~" Sooyoung tapped on Jessica's shoulder and called out with a slight aegyo. 

Jessica replied with a bright smile upon seeing Sooyoung's face. The two walked to school for the remaining 50 meters and chatted briefly. 

"Do you want to.. erm.. grab lunch together?" Sooyoung ever anxious for an answer.

"I'd.. like that.." Jessica said shyly, the both of them still not accustomed to talking to each other despite all that they have gone through. 

Soon they were at the school's gate. With their fellow peers looking at the couple, they both were drowned out by the stares and once again found it hard to talk to one another. The both of them remained uncomfortable in the crowd of students. Especially for Sooyoung who had always been known for being a loner, seeing her with someone was something new and it perked the student's curiosity. It was even more unusual that a beauty such a Jessica would hang out with Sooyoung, soon the cumulative murmurs were loud enough for Jessica and Sooyoung to hear. 

"Why is Sooyoung hanging out with that cutie?" a male student placed his hand over his mouth as he spoke.

"Are they seriously friends?" a group of girls were discussing in their own clique.

Sooyoung who got irritated hearing the numerous remarks split off from Jessica and took another route to the classroom. Jessica could only look with guilt as she saw Sooyoung walk away. She wanted to chase after her, but she knew that would only create more trouble for the both of them. Sighing, Sooyoung took the emergency exit stairs up to the classroom.

"Ahh so they just happened to take the same route, seriously if they were friends it'd be big news all over the school!" the last comment Sooyoung heard was nothing short of unpleasant. 

Sooyoung knew she only had herself to blame for all the gossip that was going around. She had always disliked hanging out in groups and had always avoided anything that required teamwork. However, she was not always like that. She once thought of the world as a kind and beautiful place but she got her hopes crushed at a tender age of 14 during Middle school. She plopped onto her seat and sighed once more as she recalled the bad days. Shrugging off the negative feelings she looked around to see if Jessica had arrived at the classroom. The crescent on her face turned upside down as she saw Jessica entering the classroom. Jessica looked at Sooyoung with a face of guilt while she took her seat.

"I'm okay.." Sooyoung mouthed. 

Jessica then looked away, but still worried about Sooyoung. Class had proceeded with time moving ever slowly for Jessica. She was desperate to talk to Sooyoung, to know how she was doing. She wasn't sure what she could do to help but she felt obliged to help her in some way especially after what she has done for her. 

"Jessica, can you tell me what is the answer for question 7b?" Jessica was caught for not being attentive the second time of the day. 

Sooyoung looked at Jessica worriedly, catching on that Jessica was probably distracted because of her. Jessica was eventually punished to stand at the back of the class. The sound of the bell signaled the end of Jessica's punishment, and she immediately went up to Sooyoung to drag her out for lunch. This time round, Jessica was not concern with the gossip at all. She walked through the corridor down to the porch allowing everyone to see her clinging onto Sooyoung's hand while she dragged the girl down. Sooyoung was fazed by Jessica's sudden actions and had unknowingly allowed herself to be dragged down to the porch. 

"Je..Jessica.. you should probably leave me alone. People will talk about you." Sooyoung tried to delicately reject Jessica's goodwill. 

"Yah, are you a pabo?! You think I will let my friends get hurt just because others might talk about me?" Jessica was slightly agitated.

"You don't know anything! Just don't bother, I'm better left alone." Jessica touched the girl's lips as she finished her sentence.

"Then tell me…Tell me so I can understand, please?" Jessica looked straight into Sooyoung's eyes.

Sooyoung couldn't help but feel captivated by this girl. Seeing her like that, Sooyoung somehow thought 'only her, I'll tell only to her'. Sooyoung took Jessica's hand away from her lips then took a deep breath.

"Let's eat.. " so both of them went to the canteen to get their food before coming back to the porch to have their lunch.

The both of them quietly sat by each other and had their lunch. Jessica who couldn't stand the silence any longer was first to break it. 

"So tell me.. Why is everyone like that?" Jessica took no measures to soften her words. She wanted the truth.

"It's not their fault. When I entered school up till now I had never took the initiative to talk to anyone, and even when they did I wasn't exactly the most responsive. I didn't have any close friends up till now, until you came.." Jessica listened patiently and compassionately as Sooyoung spoke. 

"That year I was 14.. it was already the last term of my final year in middle school. That year.. I.." Sooyoung stuttered for a bit.

---Sooyoung in 9th grade---

"Hey let's hurry up for PE, Mr Sim will kill us if we're late." the class wished out to change leaving Sooyoung and her best friend, Sarah, to be the last one to exit the class.

"Sarah, it's time to go change." Sooyoung called out to her friend who was in a daze. 

Sarah was looking into blank space as if she was deep in thought. Sooyoung had to nudge her a couple of times before she broke out of focus and came back to reality. She stood upright and glared at Sooyoung as if Sooyoung had made a mistake to hit her on the shoulder. Sooyoung was taken aback by the strong stare and quickly apologized to her friend. 

"I'm sorry. I overreacted." Sarah said in response.

Sooyoung walked behind Sarah and noticed that her shoulders were tucked in in an oddly stiff manner. She didn't know what to think of it and shrugged of the idea altogether. They went to change in the nearest changing room. The atmosphere around Sarah had not been very pleasant. There were many times Sooyoung wanted to start a conversation with her but she couldn't bring herself to. Sooyoung continued to observe Sarah, as her initial actions led to suspicion. Sarah was quiet that day, she wouldn't talk to anyone unless it was regarding school work and even if it was school work she would replied promptly and quickly drag herself out of the conversation. Sooyoung being her close friend was with her all the time, and somehow Sooyoung just couldn't shrug off the feeling that Sarah was up to something. She felt bad suspecting her close friend, but her eyes constantly stared out at Sarah as her actions were out of place. 

The two assembled at the back of the line, being the last few to arrive. The class started out with their basic run around the field before getting into teams and playing a game of basketball. Sooyoung was running beside Sarah that day. The slow pace of the jog made Sarah's mood even clearer to Sooyoung. Something was bothering Sarah for sure, but Sooyoung was reluctant to ask what. She wanted to respect her friend and she didn't want to make her friend talk about anything uncomfortable. The class started their game of basketball while the two girls sat by the bench awaiting their turn as they were selected as the next team to play. The awkwardness that day was stifling Sooyoung, but she plucked up her courage and decided to pop the question.

"Is anything bothering?" Sooyoung asked worriedly.

"It's.. nothing" Sarah was hesitant.

"Erm, in any case I'd like to thank you for being my friend. I wouldn't have made any if it wasn't for you so thanks." Sooyoung decided to change the topic.

"It's my pleasure to have you as a friend." the sullen mood was lifted slightly.

"If you ever need my help, I'll be there. Promise." Sooyoung held her pinky out for Sarah to cross.

"I'm feeling slightly ill, I think I'll head to the sick bay. And Sooyoung, I wished I could be someone better." Sarah pushed Sooyoung's hand away and walked towards the sick bay.

Sooyoung watched her friend walk away in slow steps, feeling slightly confused. The conversation they had, the words Sarah left her. Those were the last words between the both of them. Sooyoung proceeded on with the class without Sarah, feeling slightly lonely. After class she was the first one to rush out of class to the sick bay to find Sarah. She wanted to see her friend, and in any hope wanted to find out what she meant with those words. Sooyoung arrived at the sick bay only to find out that Sarah had not come to the sick bay. 'Why did she lie?' thoughts filled Sooyoung's mind. Sooyoung walked back to the classroom hoping to find Sarah there. She was the first to get back to class. Sarah wasn't in class. Sooyoung took her seat wondering where Sarah had went off to. Soon the students came back to class and lashed out their wallets from their bags to go for lunch break. 

"Wait, where's my wallet? Anyone saw my wallet?" Lucy yelled out. Lucy was the richest girl in class, and of course the top of the horde. She would always have this group of girls following her around wherever she went and boys were charmed by her to do her bidding. 

Lucy looked around the class several times for someone to admit their doing but no one did. Unexpectedly, she walked towards Sooyoung.

"You took it didn't you?" Lucy accused Sooyoung. 

"What? No, I didn't. What makes you think I stole it?" Sooyoung slightly furious at the senseless claim. 

"You were the first one back in class, it must've been you. If it was anyone else, someone would have seen it." Lucy argued. 

"Seriously I didn't steal from you. Search my bag if you want, my conscience is clear." Sooyoung defended herself.

"Don't mind if I do." Lucy said. Sooyoung was almost certain she saw a smirk on Lucy face, almost as if she was certain that she'd find her wallet in her bag.

Lucy slowly took the items out one by one as if it was a show for everyone to see. The class had gathered around Sooyoung's table to watch the drama. Sooyoung was suspicious of Lucy's behavior but she had no evidence whatsoever. Then she saw her, she saw Sarah. With her head low looking at the floor, as if she was too ashamed to look at her friend. Sooyoung caught on immediately what was going on, and sure enough Lucy's wallet revealed itself from within Sooyoung's bag. 

"What do you have to say for yourself right now?" Lucy held the wallet up dangling from her thumb and index finger.

"It wasn't me." Sooyoung already unsure of what to say.

"Then how do you explain this?" Lucy pointed to her wallet.

"Sarah, help me tell them I didn't do it." Sooyoung pleaded out to her friend. Sarah kept her head low and held her tongue. She simply watched on as her friend continued getting accused.

"All evidences point towards you. Let's go see the teacher." Lucy said with a hint of smugness in her voice. 

The teacher couldn't have chose a better time to come into class. She walked towards the crowd to find out what was going on. The students surrounding the area summarized the situation for her.

"So Sooyoung, did you do it?" the teacher asked objectively.

Sooyoung looked around at the crowd, then at Lucy, and her best friend. She couldn't believe what had just happened to her. Unable to control her temper she lashed out the words that led her to trouble.

"If the whole world thinks I did it, so be it." Sooyoung was led out by the teacher after what she said. 

After that incident, Sooyoung was labelled as a thief and people all looked upon her with degrading eyes. Rumors spread around the school, talking about how dishonest Sooyoung was. Everyone avoided her and this hurt Sooyoung greatly. She had never spoke a single word to Sarah from then on. Sooyoung eventually decided not to mingle with anyone from then onwards. Whether it was due to fear of getting betrayed or due to anger she wasn't sure. But she didn't want something like that to ever happen again. And so things worsened as people started calling her anti-social and she ultimately became a lonely soul. It didn't mean she couldn't talk to her classmate, but she had never opened up to them. She was never sure if she could trust someone ever again...

---------------

Haha I thank you guys for reading. I finally updated after quite a while. Forgive me I was busy w exams. 

Shoutouts to the readers who always commented, you give me strength:
ForeverSooSicaLOVE 
SooSicaBiased 
xAngel101 
iluveeSNSDnAPINK 
and my lovely dongsaeng, VedaSONE
and of course to those whose names I missed out I love all you guys, thanks for supporting. 
I intended to include the bullying part in this chapter but apparently it'll be too longa post so I decided to push it back :P
 
Saranghae~
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Comments

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lynnicsy #1
Chapter 25: I try not to blame anyone. It hurt~ if you know how much I love jessica and soosica but what can i do ..... now I just hoping i can continue read soosica fanfic, can continue see jessica on her activity and continue support snsd .....
icuichoisooyoung #2
Chapter 25: Just hurts !! That SM bastard Kim don't know how hurts Jessica and Sone here !!!!! Also I don't believe other members will force sica to leave. I always believe in SNSD !!!!!
Soolim
#3
Chapter 25: This event took us all by surprise!
You can't in one day, having such a mess! I mean we,as fans did not see anything coming.....TaeTiSeo was doing just fine,Hyoyeon had her birthday,everyting seemed to be fine and BAM this?
If any group, i could have not imagined for this mess to EVER happen to Soshi. I mean, they were one of the only group, that gave me the feeling of a real bond,solid friendship between members and now to have that.....things as an idols can be pretty much stressing and everything but....i'm so lost,the news of Jessica leaving and the somewhat being kicked out by the other members isn't yet registered in my mind and will certainly not be until we have more CLEAR explanation from everyone.
RevelTzu
#4
Chapter 25: wake me up when 2014 ends. damn it /le cries hard/.. i dont know what to say anymore.. :((
nurulnonoy #5
Chapter 25: its break my heart either author-shi,.i still cant believe that sica said she was being kicked out from the GG,.it was mention that after sica had launching her blanc.,she was too busy,.being on board between HK,Korea and US to managed her brand so she cannot spend a lot of time with GG,.so maybe the member think that sica no longer interested in promoting GG plus she always mention she cant do this any longer and she was about to get married,.i dont know who to trust anymore but i still support OT9,.no jessie no snsd,.
#syoo please do something,dont let sica alone
corinneniix
#6
Chapter 25: I have a feeling that it's because of internal conflict among the members that they need to solve. Like rlly. That's why I rlly hope sm would just stop their activities for a while and let them talk it through. I can't tolerate snsd as not 9. Like rlly. I can't. It's affecting everything about me I'm scared. And I rlly wish snsd would be back as 9, rlly... T_T
Sooyoungie_24
#7
Chapter 25: I really don't know who to believe... It's really hard to believe that the other 8 girls will do that to Jessica. There maybe something that she did... I can't imagine Seohyun saying that, and why are they crying on the fan meet in Japan? I'm so confused.:(
Youngielove
#8
Chapter 24: Hehehe cute. At least Krystal's not that insecure now :)
corinneniix
#9
Chapter 24: yupyupyup jungli!