Jin Mi's POV

I was sitting face to face with his. Well he is not looking to me. He is actually busy talking and laughing with his hyungs: Kris and Baekhyun. I can see how happy Sehun is. And I feel bad all of the sudden. As I recalled Kris's word to me a while ago, I feel like I don't deserve Sehun's friendship. 

Am I really using Sehun just to be close to Luhan? Am I really using Sehun to make Yixing jealous? I shook my head to remove the thoughts I have. Of course this is now what I intend to do to Sehun. Sehun is a great friend and I can't hurt him. 

But the other part of my mind said that I should tell him the truth. Even though I keep on denying it, once people will find out everything between me and Lay, me and Luhan, they'll think i'm using Sehun. For now, I don't want to tell Sehun. I really can't. My tears are forming in my eyes already. I looked away so that they won't see.

I'll expect that he will think that  I am the biggest he knows.

But Sehun-ahh... Mianhe! Mianhe Sehun. I have to be with Luhan I have to talk with Luhan. You are the only way Sehun. I can't tell you that for now. But i'll thank you someday. And you'll hate me someday.

You are still the good friend I know. I'm not using you Sehun. I'm not. 

I don't want to hurt you because maybe I ... I like you now Sehun!

(okay so this is a short update and it's kinda messed up! I'm just tired these days and I'm not inspired! )