“Jae.” Yunho stopped to clear his throat. “Jaejoong.” Jaejoong just ignored him looking over the railing. “Jaejoong please.”

“How long do you think it would take for me to hit the ground if I jumped from here?” Jaejoong asked giving Yunho a quick smirk before looking back at the ground that was several stories away.

“Are you crazy?! Don't think like that!” Yunho yelled at him.

“I can think whatever I please.” Jaejoong hissed back.

“Obviously you can't! While you were thinking about jumping to your death did you even think about what it would do to Yoochun or Junsu?” Yunho asked stepping a bit closer.

“Yoochun and Junsu?” Jaejoong mumbled. “They'll be fine. They have eachother.” he replied before getting up on the three inch thick railing.

“Jae!” Yunho yelled in panic dropping the blanket as he ran over to smaller man.

“Stop or I'll jump.” Jaejoong said softly effectively stopping Yunho a few feet away.

“Jae please. You're scaring me.” Yunho said trying to reach Jaejoong without moving.

“I'm scaring you?” Jaejoong turned to face him on the rail. “You think it's easy to be up here? To think that my life would be better if I just ended it? You were all I had Yunho. I'm not happy anymore. I don't care about what happens to me. If it weren't for all the people trying to keep me alive I would be dead right now. And all because some selfish bastard wouldn't answer his phone.” Jaejoong said.

“Selfish bastard? You're the one who left! Remember? How does that make ME the selfish one?” Yunho asked. Jaejoong looked at him before jumping back onto the patio.

“I tried.” he said walking up to Yunho. “At least I can say that much. What about you?”

“I...” Yunho stopped. “I just...”

“Exactly.” Jaejoong smiled sadly before heading over to the door, only to find it locked. “What the hell? .”

“W-what?” Yunho asked cautiously.

“Looks like we're stuck out here.” Jaejoong sighed before going to the nearest chair and sitting there. “Don't talk to me. It'll make things better.” he said as he pulled his knees to his chest and laid his head on them.

“No.” Yunho said after a few minutes of silence. “It won't make anything better.”

“Congratulations. You have a brain.” Jaejoong mumbled and they fell back into silence. Yunho looked around before sighing and taking a seat in a chair a few feet away from Jaejoong.

“Why?” Yunho asked softly.

“Why what?”

“Why did you guys leave?” Yunho asked finding the ground particularly interesting at the moment.

“Now you want to know? Well it's a bit to late.” Jaejoong sighed.

“I've always wondered.” Yunho mumbled looking at the stars. “Did I do something wrong? Did Minnie do something wrong? Why were we left behind? Why didn't we know about it? Did they care about us? Are they coming back soon? Is he coming back soon? Will I wake up and things back to normal? Will there be breakfast on the table while the kids are bickering with each other? Did I do something wrong?”

“You said that one already.”

“Well it popped up a lot.” Yunho said standing up.

“Can't you just sit still?” Jaejoong asked irritatedly.

“No I can't. I don't see how you are.” Yunho said walking back and forth. “Are you going to answer my question or not?” he stopped to look at Jaejoong.

“Which question?”

“Why. Did. You. Leave?”

“I tried telling you. And if my memory doesn't fail me, you never answered the phone.” Jeajoong said glaring at Yunho.

“Then tell me now goddamnit!” Yunho yelled.

“Why should I?!” Jaejoong yelled back. “Why should I let everything out now? You ignored me! I may have left without you knowing but I tried, Yunho. I tried to get a hold of you and let you know what the hell was going on! I tried! I tried damn it! For a month straight! I woke up and called you! Before I went to sleep, I called you! And you didn't even have the decency to pick up your ing phone! If you were really as curious as you said you were you would have answered.”

“I couldn't!” Yunho said causing them both to fall into silence. “I couldn't. I didn't have my phone.” Yunho mumbled. “You guys left and a week later they took our phones from us and didn't give them back until we started doing activities again. It was their way of punishing us because we refused to do anything without you guys. Happy?” Yunho said sitting back down. “Changmin got me up everyday to eat something for breakfast, then went out looking for you guys. He'd come back at lunch make more food, then go back out to look for you guys. Everyone's saying that he didn't lose as much as I did, but he never stopped looking for you three. He lost his brothers, Jae. He lost his family. He may not have been around a lot, but even he felt the emptiness. He's the one who decided it'd be best to start working again. After four months of waking up, eating, and searching, he's the one who said we had to work. Four months. And you say you tried.” Yunho looked over at Jaejoong to find silent tears running down his face. “I can't say I did anything, because I was too lost in despair to know my days from nights. But he tried Jae. He tried.”

“I couldn't tell you.” Jaejoong chocked out as he started crying harder. “That's why you didn't know we were leaving. I couldn't tell you what was going on. I was afraid. Chun and Su just happened to be there that one time. That one time was all it took. They knew and I felt like I'd die.”

“What.. What happened?” Yunho asked softly.

“I don't know how long it had been happening. The reason I never went to the manager by myself. I always drug you along. But I always ended up alone with him. And he always...” Jaejoong stopped to catch his breath. “He.. and...” Jaejoong cried harder. “He said he wouldn't tell you guys if I just cooperated. He wouldn't tell the fans. And there were camera's.”

“Wait. Shh. Wait.” Yunho said now kneeling in front of Jaejoong. “Was he.. was he ually harassing you? Was he... forcing you to have with him?” Jaejoong only cried harder. Yunho gently pulled him into a hug.

“I was afraid to let anyone know. But Chun and.. and Su. They f-found out and convinced me.. t-to tell someone. S-so I w-went to S-Soo-man but he... he knew aand he said he'd show the world. Let everyone k-know w-what I was really like i-if I even th-thought of leaving.” Jaejoong hiccuped. “It kept going l-like th-that for a year bef-fore Hankyungs lawsuit started. Y-Yoochun and Junsu decided that I-I had to do the s-same. W-When the lawsuit was handed in, we were kicked out. Yoochun and Junsu's n-names were on it, b-but we didn't h-have time to tell you guys.”

“How long did it go on for?” Yunho asked tightening his grip on Jaejoong.

“Three years.” Jaejoong mumbled through his tears.

“Three years?” Yunho gasped. “Three years?!” he stood up abruptly, went over to the door and started banging on it. “Someone open the ing door!”

“Yunho. Stop.” Jaejoong said softly though tears were still running down his face.

“Three years Jaejoong! I was with you since before then! Three years and I didn't even notice!” Yunho yelled as the door was opened.

“Could you be a bit quieter?” Yoochun asked.

“You knew! For at least a year! And you didn't ing say anything!” Yunho yelled at his ex-band mate.

“Yunho..” Jaejoong tried as he stood

“I deserved to know!” Yunho kept going his own silent tears running down his face. “I should've been the first person that you came to!”

“Yunho! Please stop!” Jaejoong said as he grabbed Yunho in a back hug. “Please. It's not his fault. Please stop. I wouldn't let him tell you. So please don't blame him.” Yunho slide to the ground and Jaejoong fell with him.

“Three years.” Yunho mumbled as Jeajoong kept whispering 'sorry' over and over.