Rosé

Everyone agrees to eat dinner together after the festival. We went to a samgyupsal restaurant where there was a promo of 20% discount if we're going to order at least 10 servings (which we obviously will exceed since all the actors and the young members of the artistic team are here).

Because of our number, the staff gives us a private room separate from the other customers. It has 2 long tables that are parallel from each other. It was a really great place for bonding with the team.

I take a seat on the cushion that's nearest to the door just in case I suddenly get sick of socializing (I don't want to be the center of attention if I was on the opposite end when they see me walking out early). Jimin oppa then sits beside me.

When everyone has finally settled, I notice that the seat across me is still vacant. I silently pray then that no one (especially a stranger) would sit in front of me because I don't want to be forced to talk (like how I'm feeling about Jimin oppa).

But of course, God has a different idea. 

Of all people, Jungkook takes the seat in front of me. Why are you here?

"Because this is the only free seat," he pours himself a soju and drinks it as if it's just tea.

!

I cover my mouth as I realize that I said what's on my mind out loud again. This is the only free seat? Surely Lisa would save a seat for him. I try to search for Lisa and see her at the second table sitting beside the guy called Taehyung.

Apparently, Taehyung, the guy who lend me his hanky after I shed tears from listening to my life anthem (Jung Seung Hwan's If It Is You) is a senior member of CoA who just came back after participating in the musical Wings, which was on a world tour that just ended recently. 

Coincidentally, it turns out he and Lisa knows each other (which is very obvious as the two of them can't seem to keep their hands off of each other). Lisa explains during dinner that they met back in Thailand when Taehyung was on vacation. She also admits that she went to Korea and joined CoA in the hopes that she would meet (cringe alert) her first love. This earns her (another cringe alert) a soft kiss on the lips from Taehyung. It was still lovely to see people who finally met each other after years being affectionate until we could see some tongues darting out.

Jennie whistles, "Get a room!"

Suga whispers to her, "Maybe we should too," which earns him a smack in the head and a humiliating laugh from everyone which he didn't mind of course.

Dinner is actually fun.

Everybody participated in the conversation and mini alcohol games. Except the dude in front of me who has such a dark look. I don't blame him though, seeing that special person in love with someone else feels like a knife impaled on you. (And I just mean him, not me... Why am I even denying it when I've already admitted it. Okay fine, I'm miserably guilty of it too.)

Jimin oppa distracts me from my thoughts when he asks, "Roseanne, do you want anything? I'm going to the convenience store for a bit."

"Oh no Jimin oppa, I'm good. You go ahead."

When Jimin oppa leaves, Jungkook suddenly sniggers. I ask, "I'm sorry, what's so funny?"

He just shakes his head, "Nothing, Roseanne," then downs another shot.

Why is he saying my name mockingly? Pissed, I sarcastically tell him, "Well I'm glad you're having fun."

"Fun?" He looks at the new couple and pours himself a glass of soju again, "Yeah this is fun."

I roll my eyes at him, pissed that he's getting himself wasted because of someone else. Annoyed, I say, "Well let me brighten up your day more. Welcome to the club!"

"Club? What club?" He rests his head (that's still so adorable even though he's drunk at the moment) on his hand as he gets interested on what I'm saying.

"The unrequited club," I clang my glass to his and drink my own share of soju.

He stares at me with his big eyes for a while before laughing mindlessly, "Cheers."

Since that night, Jungkook's bubbly personality gradually faded. He talked less, he laughed less. He just cared less. It's clearly because he's hurting that Lisa is starting to drift away from him. They spend less time with each other as Lisa's too preoccupied with Taehyung.

Today, since the foolish me is also hurting from just seeing him devastated, I decide to take it upon me to bring back the Jungkook (I fell for).

As soon as SinB calls a lunch break, I shout and run to him, "Jungkook!"

He just looks at me will a dull expression and says, "Uh, what's up?"

I lift my paper bag to his eyes and tell him, "Lunch with me?"

He puts my hand down and stares at me while I expectantly wait for his answer. After an awkward pause where I have internally punched myself about a hundred times already because of this humiliating experience, he replies, "I'm not really hungry."

"Oh," I bite my lower lip in disappointment. 

Stop Rosé.

You're a woman in mission, don't give up just yet. 

"But it's Dwaeji Gukbap. I mean, I didn't cook this Pork Rice Soup on purpose just because you've mentioned before that this was your favorite. Uh, I just happened to have the ingredients on my fridge. Uh, yes, just pure coincidence!" I blabbered.

He snorts then throws his head back and laughs, the loudest I've heard since he got his heart broken. "Alright, alright," he smiles and takes the paper bag, carries it over his shoulder and walks away.

He stops then at the door, turns at me and says, "Are you coming or what?"

Oopsie. I got stunned by his dazzling smile that I was out of my mind for a bit. "Uh, coming, yes. Be right there, yes."

Slurps fills the silence as we eat. How do I break the ice? Should I talk about it directly or dangle on a completely non-sense topic?

"This is really delicious."

"Huh?" I glance at him who just handsomely grins at me who got caught wandering. "Ah, uh, yeah thanks."

He continues to talk while eating, "Seriously, what can you not do? You write so well, you got pipes, great cooking skills, you're even beautiful."

"Well I--huh? Wh-what did you say?" My whole face opens up in surprise.

When it finally hits him that he just shot me a series of compliments, and told me I'm beautiful, he chokes on his food and stutters as well, "I, uh, I--I just meant to say that, uh, as a guy, you're considered pretty. That's it."

We both turn tomatoes after that exchange. Jungkook quickly apologizes then, "Sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable."

"Oh God no. You were just saying facts anyway. I mean, I am beautiful," I say jokingly.

Jungkook then guffaws and I flick him on the forehead as I laugh with him. "Why are you laughing so hard? Are you saying I'm not?" I complain with a smile that reaches my ears.

He ruffles my hair in response and smiles lopsidedly, "No. I just miss this. Especially that," he draws a circle before my face, "your blushing face."

Dugeudugeudugeudugeun

Calm down heart, calm down.

I take this opportunity then to ask him about it because it felt like the right timing. "So, how are you?"

He looks at me as if he's debating whether to dodge the question or answer it truthfully. He goes for something in the middle and smiles sadly, "You're a writer, you should know."

I take his free hand and squeeze it for comfort, "It's going to pass."

He shifts his attention towards my hand and turns it upward and plays with it, drawing figures on my palm with his finger, "Says the girl who cried over a song."

"Hey that's not fair because I just recently find out that I like some--uhm, uh," I just exposed myself.

"What? One-sided again?" When he sees the puzzled expression on my face, he reveals that he heard Jennie saying I'm into someone these days, then looks down to the hand he's holding again. I need to talk some sense to that girl.

Jungkook slowly touches every finger, intertwines it with his own, and continues then, "I don't get it. How can not one of them like you back? After the list of compliments I just mentioned, are they all that stupid?"

"Oh God, you have no idea," how big of a fool you truly are, coming from you.

"Tell me," he suddenly says, his face gradually turns serious. "What's the worst in falling for a person one-sidedly?"

"The worst..." I ponder as I recall the past I'm trying so hard to forget. "The worst was when I looked at him and found him smiling at me but knew it meant nothing at all. Maybe it never had." I beam as I try to cover up the hurt.

"Rosé," he caresses my cheek. "You don't have to pretend that you're okay."

Jungkook

Her smile falters and gasps. She immediately puts away my hand that was unconsciously cupping her face. I don't know what went on my mind but I just had to touch her. My heart aches when I see her forcing herself to be strong when what she really needs is someone to lean on and will make her forget and feel special again.

"Wh-w-what do you mean?" she stutters.

"I just mean if you feel like laughing, you can come to me. But at the same time, if you want to go ugly-cry, I'm also here for you. You don't have to pretend you're a robot when you're with me."

She just stares at me, her breathing getting heavier by the minute that I'm starting to get worried. I reach out for her hands and give both a squeeze, "I told you, you can trust me."

When she still doesn't react, I drop her hands and pinch her tomato cheeks hard, "I'm running out of words to say here missy. Any word from you would be nice."

She slaps my hands strongly and finally utters a word, "Ouch!"

I show her my hands that have red hand marks on it, "This is ouch."

She frantically explains, "Well I'm sorry, you were just being--"

"What?"

"Kind and genuine... and that's something I'm not used to," which makes me smirk so she straightaway adds, "and which is so not you, by the way." 

I look at her, mesmerized in all that she is. This girl, for some reason, really knows how to make me f