ENTRY # 14

A Christmas Special

Choi Siwon woke up in a very angry state.

No scratch that, he’s not just angry, he’s enraged. How can he not believe me? Was I too forward? Pushy even?

But from what Siwon can remember, Kyuhyun also kissed him back it was only after Yesung saw the two of them and everything just went plainly sour. Why did Kyuhyun think that it’s only an agenda? Why can’t he believe Siwon? He even dared question Siwon’s disorder.

As padded across the living room, he decided to watch television. He grabbed the remote and brought the TV back to life. When he saw reruns of Home Alone 2. He realized that it’s already Christmas.

Of all the times that is hard, this particular say seems to be the hardest yet. Even when he was younger his parents often left him alone on Christmas and he felt that again this year. Suddenly he thought of Kyuhyun and what the other man said a few days ago. It hurt that he didn’t believe was Siwon said.

But he really couldn’t blame Kyuhyun. He had every right to react that way and Siwon couldn’t hold that against him.  He steeled himself and took his phone out. He wanted to somehow talk to Kyuhyun and fix everything.

He dialed Kyuhyun’s number and he waited with a very nervous feeling in his gut.

After several missed calls, Siwon was about to give up but on his last try, someone picked up his call.

“What?”  Someone from the other line snapped. It was Kyuhyun alright.

“I just wanted to explain again.” He scratched the tip.

There was a long pause on the other end of the line. “Look, I know that it may seem that I was doing it on purpose but trust me, I didn’t. I like you too much to hurt you again.” Siwon blurted. He wanted to smack himself.

“Did you just confess your feelings for me, Dr. Choi?” Kyuhyun didn’t hide the surprise in his voice. Siwon also surprised himself at what he’d just said but since he already said so, there was no turning back now.

“Yes. I do. I like you…a lot.” It may have taken a lot of time for Siwon to admit it but his jealousy towards Kyuhyun’s relationship with Yesung cemented the fact that he is indeed smitten with the reporter who almost destroyed his reputation. A small smile curved on Siwon’s lips as he finally had the guts to admit it to himself.

“Well, can I think about what you just said because your actions are very different from what you’re saying.”

Siwon sighed. “Yeah, I know. Is there a way that we can work through this?”

Yet another pause droned Siwon’s ear. What if he already blew it with Kyuhyun. That wouldm just be a very sad ending to a very boring move.

But Kyuhyun’s answer surprised him so much.

“Okay, let’s meet up today, I can go to your place.” Without anymore words, Kyuhyun hung up and Siwon’s mouth was hanging, not being able to believe what just happened.

Siwon opened the door with a big grin on his face as he saw Kyuhyun who looked very serious and didn’t even bother to smile. “C’mon in.”

Kyuhyun nodded as Siwon stepped aside to make way for the other man. “Merry Christmas.” Siwon greeted. He looked at Siwon and flashed him an awkward smile.

Kyuhyun placed both of his hands on his hips and looked at Siwon, eyeing him up and down. Then, he flashed him a small smile before taking out something from his bag and handing it to Siwon.

Siwon looked at the creatively wrapped gift. Not once in his life had he ever receive such a thing because all he can remember was not wanting to celebrate Christmas because of what happened to him when he was younger.

“What is this?”

Kyuhyun looked at Siwon with a very perplexed expression on his face. “A Christmas present. Didn’t you receive one when you were younger?”

Siwon shook his head and smiled as he felt the silky wrapper of the gift. A slight blush dusting his face as he felt like celebrating Christmas for the very first time since he had that dreadful accident.

Siwon shook his head.

“Wow, I guess I’m you first.”

Siwon suddenlt blushed. There was something about what Kyuhyun said that was too ual and he couldn’t help but get red.

Kyuhun and Siwon decided to let bygones be bygones and just enjoy each other’s company but Siwon couldn’t quite settle his nerves because he still hand’t told Kyuhyun about what he did to Yesung’s restaurant.

He just couldn’t bring himself to come clean because he knew that Kyuhyun would get mad and he’ll probably tell Siwon off and he wouldn’t like that at all. Kyuhyun’s head suddenly rested on Siwon’s shoulder as they were watching How The Grinch Stole Christmas on DVD. Kyuhyun sprung it to him that it was his favorite movie and brought a copy for them to watch. Siwon always thought that those kinds of movie were boring but as soon as Kyuhyun popped it in the DVD player, he found himself laughing at Jim Carey’s acting.

Siwon burshed off some of Kyuhyun’s hair away from his forehead and kissed the top of the younger man’s forehead. Kyuhyun moved a little and snuggled closer to Siwon.

Siwon wrapped his arms around Kyuhyun. “You’re so warm…” Kyuhyun whispered.

Siwon looked at Kyuhyun and smiled. “Am I?”

Kyuhyun nodded. “I like it when you’re like this.” Siwon couldn’t contain himself anymore and made Kyuhyun look at him. He leaned forward and captured the man’s lips and he felt him kissing back. He chuckled into the kiss as Kyuhyun melted in his arms.

That night, it was cold but they kept each other warm as they made love. For Kyuhyun, it was magical because it was his first time and he couldn’t have asked for a better way to lose his ity.

END OF ENTRY 14

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