Prompt from jellobeansss

Pairing: BangLo

"BangLo broke up and Junhong is having a hard time moving on, please use the song Six Feet Under by Billie Eilish"

Sometimes he'd find himself sitting on the balcony, his knees brought up to his chest as the cold wind assaulted his skin, reminding him that yet another season has passed yet here he was.

Still stuck in the same place.

Junhong shivers as he stares up at the grey sky, wondering when the sunshine died away even though it hadn't been any different yesterday. He stands up and decides to go inside seeing as how his fingertips were burning red.

As the door slides closed behind him he remains still. The apartment was as silent as it was the day before, so why did it feel so strange? It felt so odd knowing that there wasn't someone sitting somewhere, ready to greet him with warm kisses and a bright smile.

Junhong smiled bitterly to himself, and he glanced at the calendar. Every day he'd find himself looking at it, the calendar that had been frozen on August 2016, the month his love died.

Shaking his head he steps away and reaches for his jacket. Maybe a walk would do him some good, the snow always reminded him of warmer times, he hoped he could revel in them a little longer.

Junhong reached for his phone and he's disappointed to see messages from only his friends and parents. None from Him. It was understandable, he'd moved on after all. 

Like how Junhong should have.

He leaves his apartment with a jacket snug around his upper body and a scarf wrapped around his neck. Junhong carefully makes his way down the lobby and towards the nature trail nearby.

Tilting his head up towards the sky he exhales watching how his breath disintegrates into nothing. His boots sink in the snow as he trudges along the pathway and he searches for his favourite clearing.

Junhong sits himself down on the sole tree stump protruding from the white snow and his eyes purposely ignore the initials etched onto the dying bark. Junhong stares into the distance and his heart aches.

He slowly closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, intaking the heavy scent of snow and grass along with a hint of pollution in the air. Or maybe it was just the scent of His cigarettes, the scent that had been etched so deep in his skin that he couldn't escape it.

His fingertips tap to the beat of nothing as he shivers in the cold. It'd been so unexpected, their seperation. He hadn't made any indications that he was unhappy with Junhong. 

Junhong was well aware that the love was over, life had moved on even if he was still in the same place. Everyone continued living as though nothing had happened, and to an extent he did as well. Only to fool himself, fool himself into thinking that he was okay.

He gently touches his bottom lip and he can still feel uneven teeth biting at the flesh there, until it had felt raw and tender. He could still remember those calloused hands running up and down his spine, he didn't want to remember. He wanted to forget his touch. 

It made things so much harder.

Junhong opens his eyes as he squints at the bright snow that assaults his tired orbs. He knew that with one phone call and a few words, he'd accept Him back whole heartedly. And he hated how weak his heart had become.

His love had died, it was buried deep in his heart and deep in his memory. His beautiful memories had become coloured in grey, they caused pain rather than happiness when he remembered. 

The reoccuring question of whether their love could come back to life often crossed his mind, but the more he thought about it the more he realized it was impossible.

One could water a dead flower for an eternity and it'd still remain dead.

Withered.

Gone.

Junhong sighed and a small smile pulled at his dry lips, he brought his knees to his chest and he ignored the empty feeling in his chest. Maybe if he kept Yongguk in his heart a little longer, their love could come back.

Just maybe.

Six Feet Under - Billie Eilish