A hospital bed had never seemed this comfortable before, but the two girls lay there in complete comfort, their bodies intertwined, while they still panted heavily.

“Oh my...” Bomi was a loss at words. A smile took control of her features, not getting to express completely just how happy she felt right then and there. She tipped her head back so she could have more access to Chorong’s neck, the pale skin looking tempting right in front of her. Her kisses became soft bites, and Chorong’s body reacted beautifully.

“Bomi-ah...” The older girl couldn’t suppress a moan when Bomi nibbled her ear. Slowly, Chorong slid her hand up Bomi’s hip, resting it on the girl’s smooth stomach.

With no clothes in their way, the two girls just enjoyed each other’s presence as they hadn’t done in a while. Caresses and kisses were all they could think about while touching each other, desire and pleasure combined with love.

“I love you.”

Chorong smiled when she heard it whispered in her ear, right between nibbles. She lowered her hand on Bomi’s hip, caressing her and making her ticklish.

“I love you too.” Nothing more was needed.

In that moment, they had everything they could ask for, even if it was in a hard and small hospital bed. The setting never mattered when they were together, the most important thing being their skin-to-skin contact. The passion, the need they shared, was more than enough to forget any trouble. And their love was enough to overcome any obstacle.

∼

Naeun heard Eunji arrive before she saw her. Night had fallen already, but they had managed to fool her manager thanks to the help of the maknaes. Now they were going out to have a drink or something similar, since dinner time had passed a while ago.

“Naeun-ah!” Eunji smiled at the younger girl when she saw her, but it didn’t reach her eyes.

Naeun tried to kiss her on the cheek, but Eunji avoided the gesture, pretending to be looking for something inside her purse.

“Unnie, are you okay?” Naeun was worried by Eunji’s sudden attitude. Not even a day ago they’d been cuddling together throughout the night.

“Yeah, don’t worry.” Eunji wouldn’t even look at her in the eye. “I’m just tired.”

Naeun wouldn’t believe what she was hearing, but she decided to let it pass and started leading the way towards the bar she frequented with her friends. Since it was a weekday, she wasn’t expecting any of them to actually be there, so she was looking forward to some quality time with Eunji in an environment she actually controlled.

“Let’s sit over there.” Naeun pointed at the table in the further corner, a red, velvety couch looking comfortable from there.

While Eunji approached the sofa and sat there waiting for the younger girl, Naeun walked towards the bar and ordered their drinks. Eunji waited for the other girl in discomfort, her mind going all over what the manager had told her. She felt this heavy weight in her heart and her stomach, anxiety and distress that wouldn’t allow her to smile. And the worst thing of it all was that she was supposed to hurt Naeun in the process.

“Unnie?” Naeun arrived with their drinks and sat next to Eunji. “Unnie? Are you sure you’re alright?”

Eunji nodded softly, trying to smile but failing spectacularly. Naeun noticed, but she didn’t know what was wrong with her unnie.

“So... why did you want us to meet?” Eunji talked in a whisper.

“I...” Naeun blushed. “I want us to talk. For real. It is obvious to us and to all our members that we have something going on but I’m not sure of what it is, or even if you feel like I do.”

Eunji started crying when she heard those words. Eunji, who never cried. Naeun panicked at her unnie’s reaction and stayed speechless for a few instants.

“I’m sorry, Naeun-ah...” Eunji stood up, hiding her face from her dongsaeng. “I’m going to use the restroom.”

Eunji left, leaving a speechless Naeun with her red drink on her hand, staring open-mouthed at the unnie that couldn’t hold the tears while she ran to the restroom.

∼

Eunji looked at herself in the mirror for a long while. There was nothing inside her that could give her enough strength to do what she was supposed to. She just didn’t want to. She tried to call Bomi, but it was late, and she wasn’t actually expecting an answer. When the older girl didn’t pick up, Eunji sat down in a corner, tears streaming down her cheeks. She wasn’t strong enough. Her heart was weak too, and she loved.

The love she felt for Naeun was something she had never felt before, not for anyone else. But she hadn’t been able to profess it sincerely when the younger girl confessed first, and now it might be too late. Knowing what’s right and being willing to do it were two very different things, and that’s exactly where she was right then. She needed to think of Bomi, of her members and their fans, of the agency that would suffer too if all this was known – when all this was known -, and do what was right. She would never actually know whether her actions would have led to more collateral damage, but she had to trust those who were there to guide her. She had wanted to call her mom and cry and tell her everything that she was going through, but she didn’t know how her mother would react to that relationship, so she was still hesitant.

Bomi, on the other side, had been the most understanding friend she could ever ask for, but Eunji knew she was in no position to ask things from her, since Bomi was undergoing her own problems now. So she was just trying to deal with her issues on her own, even if that was only hurting her more.

She stood up and washed her face in determination, nodding to herself. She grabbed her things and made sure she wasn’t showing any more tears before leaving the restroom on her way to break her lover’s heart.

∼

Naeun looked at her watch, aware of how long Eunji had been in the restroom. She was about to stand up and go look for her when she saw the older girl walk towards her.

“You okay?” Naeun sounded worried once again.

Eunji didn’t even answer this time; she obviously had no energy left to pretend. Naeun decided to speak her thoughts and feelings once and for all, otherwise she was just worrying for nothing.

“I think we need to talk about us,” she started. Eunji wasn’t looking at her, but she continued anyway. “I told you I love you, twice now. Why can’t you answer? Honestly, I’m not expecting you to return my feelings, I just want to know how you feel and whether you want to stop or whatever it is that goes through your mind. Because I am tired of waiting. I was scared of my own feelings and it took me a long time to become comfortable with them, but then you were the one who took the first step that night, and I know you do care about me, and I can see you feel something but maybe you’re still not ready to say it out loud. And I don’t want to pressure you but with everything that has been happening with Bomi-unnie I can see now how short life really is and I just want everything to work through because there’s nothing I would like more in this life than to be with you in every sense of the word because I know that I love you and I have realized that I don’t want –

“I need to say something.”

Naeun looked shocked when Eunji interrupted her. She didn’t know whether the older girl had something to say about her rushed and irrational speech or if it was just that she had been immersed in her own thoughts and feelings. But Eunji’s words were sharp and cut Naeun’s speech all of a sudden.

“There’s something that should be clear, Naeun-ah.” The younger girl could feel something wrong in Eunji’s voice, and that’s when she truly started to worry.

While looking at Eunji’s serious face, Naeun tried to be strong and prepare herself for the blow she felt was coming, but nothing could have prepared for how her heart broke into pieces when she heard Eunji speak again.

“I don’t love you,” the older girl said. “I think I never have. It was all a huge mistake.”

“U-unnie…” Naeun could do nothing but stutter.

“I had fun, but I think it’s time to go back to what we know is real.” Naeun’s world started spinning, she was running out of air to breathe. But Eunji continued, her words sharp as thorns. “I’ve had my fun, but that’s all I wanted. We have to be realistic now, and be there for Bomi-ah.”

Somewhere inside her, Naeun found a glint of bravery. “If that’s worrying you, I share the feeling. But you don’t have to push me away for–”

“Let me say it again, because I don’t think you’re getting it.” Eunji wasn’t blinking when she locked her eyes with Naeun’s, a shiver going down the younger girl’s back. “I don’t love you. And I don’t want to have anything with you. There’s nothing going on between us, and I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong impression.”

The older girl stood up and grabbed her purse and her jacket. She looked around, avoiding Naeun’s eyes, and sighed before turning around and walking out of the bar, leaving an astonished Naeun behind, having trouble breathing while she saw her world full of hopes turn to confused ashes.