On this chapter I used a beta reader, thanks to bernicemayo for fix my grammar and spelling^^

2014

Are you still looking me as your best friend?

I can’t believe I said that words to Taemin oppa. Actually I’m afraid, afraid for the answer. Will this turn to things that I hope for? If it isn’t, it will be embarrassing. But what I expect from that question? Yeah… It’s nice if he answer; you’re still my best friend. But I become giddier.  I am expecting more, more just than best friend.

He paused and looked into my eyes. I thinked I had put him in a difficult position. I can see he is struggling inside. I sigh.

“Is this a difficult question for you?”

“No...”.

“Your order has arrived”, the waitress interrupted us and served the Nachos and drinks. Before the waitress leave, she said, “Your playing is awesome”.

“Oh..Thank you”, Taemin oppa said.

After she leaved, I said to him, “Many ladies fall for your playing, oppa”

He said, “I think that’s true, Are you not?”.

“Oh… “, I am little surprise. Why does he care about my thoughts? But I don’t want to answer that.

“You answer my question first”, I said to him as I started eating the nachos.

“What question?”

I rolled my eyes. Must I, repeat those embarrassing question again? “Are you still considering me as your best friend?”

“Ah… That question”,

I bite my lips as I waited for him to answer.

“Of course, yes, you are. You always be my best friend”

I don’t know my heart brook as I listen to those words. Yeah… People said, if you expect more, the more disappointed you will be.

“mmm..”, I nodded my head and stared at the Nachos blankly.

“Why? Can I expect more?” He said while staring at me deeply. I don’t know why but my heart beating fast. I gulped many time, am I misheard something?

He smiles at me, “Why? Did I surprise you? Sorry, you can forget the last question”.

My mind went blank. I can’t remember what food we had ordered. I’m a weirdo. I’m frozen whenever he become so straightforward

After a while, a waitress approaches us and serves our food.  “Ah… Our foods have arrived... mmm… It looks like delicious”. He slice the meat and said, “Naeunah..ah..”, he raised his fork and fed me.

I open my mouth,”mmm... It’s delicious oppa”.

“Are you feed Rebecca too?”

He laughed and stared at me, why he always stare at me that way, do he know I’m nervous when he look at me like that, “No, I only do it to two woman”.

“Who?”

“First, Kyungsoonie, my mom”

“Ah...” I nodded, Taemin oppa really love her Mom.

“And second is you”,

I froze and don’t know how to respond to him.

 He gave me so many surprised today, first he hugged me from the back, second, I don’t know what he is up to, our conversation is a bit weird.

It felt like you are mine, it seems like you’re mine but not. It felt like I’m yours, it seems like I’m yours but not. It felt like we’re lovers, it seems like we’re lovers but not. What are we? I am confused*.

***

After lunch we walked around together. We took some pictures at The Tower Bridge and The London Bridge.

While we were walking, I asked him.

“How about So Joong Sunbaenim?” Why I asked this question? But I am curious.

He was surprised and said, “She is fine. Last summer, she visited me here”,

“On what occasion?”

“She had a photo shoot in London for about one month”

“So, you were with her for a month?”

He smiled at me and said, “No, she met me after two weeks she was in London, I met her three times. First, when she visited Verdi, second, when I accompanied her to tour around London, and third when I escorted her to the airport”

 “mmm…”, I nodded. It felt like I poured salt on my wound. I felt uncomfortable about his answer.

“You don’t have anything to ask to me?” I said to him

“Are you going to answer it?”

“Depends on the question”

“Why? Can you just answer it?”

“Ahrasso, I will. What is the question?”

“Do you… hate me?”,I paused and looked at him, I never expected that he will ask me that question.

“Why do you think I hate you?”

“mmm… I don’t know, I just felt that, after all I had done to you, it’s normal for you to hate me”, he said as he looked down.

“Do you think I’m not normal?”

“Aniya..mmm..Just answer my question”

“Yes, I hate you”, I said as I hold my smile. I want to hate you oppa, but I can’t.

“Ah..Really, I’m sorry”, He looked down again.

“What can I do for you, so that you don’t hate me anymore?”

“mmm… You can buy me Ice cream”, How can I tell him, just stand by my side and I won’t hate you anymore.

“Oh…” I could see his surprised expression.

 He bought me some strawberry ice cream.

***

We walked again and took the double Decker bus.

“It’s my first time riding double Decker bus oppa”.

“Where are we going?” I asked him

“To one of London landmarks. It’s nice to go there when London is dark”

“Mmm..What is the landmark?”

“The London Eye..”

“Ah…since yesterday I wanted to go there”

“Gure…”

We went silent again, until Taemin oppa brook the silence, “It has been a long time since I rode a bus and sat beside you like this. In the past, we almost do it every day right?”, Taemin oppa said.

“Yes, but who told you to leave me?” I murmured but I think he heard that.

“Oh..”, he touched his hair, looked down and said, “Sorry”, I think he said sorry too many times today.

“Why?” I said as I look her eyes

“Oh”, He was surprised with my question.

“Why do you leave me?”

I feel my heart beating fast again, not because the question that I asked to him, but because his answer.

“Because I love you”

(*) mark it is from the song SOME by Soyou and Junggigo, I Love the song. Here if you want to hear the song.

please comment about this chapter^^