thank you for coming this far. this will be the last chapter.

Life teaches me so many lessons to learn

“What are you doing?”

“I’m just looking for the flowers here!”

And that’s how my lesson started; ever since the first time I met her—

Our first meeting were not that good as it’s was, Jiyeon; was never been my favourite person, nor I know, for some reason she never been

Or—

Have been but I failed to notice at.

“Jinwoon why don’t you be nicer to Jiyeon?”

That’s how my older sister always asks me.

For some reason, I don’t know why I need to act nicer to her?

Is she that important?

“and why do I need to act nicer to her?”

“coz that’s the proper way to do, a boy should be nicer towards a girl, have some respect”

That’s the continuously I heard towards them, when we both started growing up together, all I did was to annoy her

For some reason, I found it very interesting to see her annoyed. Maybe that’s the reason why we don’t like each other.

We are mostly and probably like dogs and cats.

But I never hated that. For a reason, I found enjoyment towards that. Was is enjoyment is the proper choice of words?

“I hate you!!!!” she shouted on my face, her face redden with so much madness.

What’s new right? She’s always been mad at me by the way, but this time, it’s different she was mad at me from throwing a ball in her head.

“Jinwoon what’s happening here?”

“dunno” I shrug.

“He throws a ball in my head!” she almost crying.

“it’s not my fault! It’s my hand’s fault, it’s slips!” I shrugs, I saw how her eyes started from crying. My heart constricts.

Yes, I love annoying her, I enjoy seeing her frowning and restraining her anger towards mine. But this time? This time is different, as I wanted to steps my feet to her, to comfort and say sorry for what I’ve done, but it seems my feet been glued on my spot, her tears make me lose, lose in my track.

“What you’ve done?” I saw annoyance in my sister’s face yet my eyes still glued to her. She runs away, and I just watch her do that.

“You wished”  I laughed as me and my friends entered our room,  my eyes started fixing to seat where she was; I expected her to be here, I expected her rolling her eyes towards mine, but what I found is an empty seat right in front of my eyes.

“Jiyeon is absent”

I almost jumped in my spot as I heard her friend told me that. Absent? Why? Is she sick? Something happen? Is this because of what I did? My mind flew away as I keep staring on her seat.

Should I ask her? Should I call her? Oh shoot! I don’t have her digits. Yes, noona does! I should ask her instead, but wait, why would I call her by the way?

To check on her?Jeez!

“if you like her better told her than that”

My eyes blink continuously from what her friend said, she simply shrug her shoulder and looks on the board.

I sighed; maybe this day would be boring without her.

[hey bro! where are you?]

My brows furrowed, I admit, for the past days I’ve been occupied. I have to check the caller once more to be sure.

[hey this is Key!]

I heard my best friend chuckled. Why he called by the way?

[hey are you stil there?]

“yeah. Why? I mean why did you called? You don’t have any class?”

Key, my best friend was studying miles away from here, to be exact he was studying abroad. And he didn’t called without a reasons, since he was a busy man.

[well—I’m here at Seoul]

I heard him laughed on the other line.

[and what’s with the long face by the way?]

My brows furrowed once more, I turn my head and saw him raising one of his hand. I smiled, runs towards him

“bro!”

“hey man!”

we both made our hand shake. I miss my best friend, it’s been while since we last communicate.

“I transferred here” he chuckled.

“chincha? Waeyo?”

“Key!!!!”

From his back I saw Jiyeon runs towards us, no she runs towards Key. I saw how she hugged him from his back.

I thought not seeing her for days would be the worst, I thought seeing her cry is the worst thing but I wrong. So wrong.

To see her hugging someone else.  Is the worst thing I have.

I felt my heart constrict, I felt my heart tighten from the strange feeling I felt. I was pissed, I was irritated, I wanted to shout, I was really mad yet why I felt like crying?

“oh!you really do missed me” Key chuckled, I saw how his eyes sparkles to her.

I saw how Jiyeon frowned towards me, she pursed her lips, and she rolled her eyes. I, on the other hand was shocked, it didn’t the first time she did that to me, it didn’t the first time I saw how close they are like that.

I know, despite we are all grew up almost together, her closeness towards him is much more different than mine.

I know, I know ever since, that she was too close to him, how close they were was something made me like this. What is this feeling by the way?

But this foreign pain I felt right now killing me.

“Stop being so clingy as if you’re his girlfriend” I looked away, not wanting to see this. No I don’t want to see this. How she was close to someone. I hissed not wanting to sounds like bitter. Trying to sound normal though I know, deep down inside this strange feeling that is started building me become unbearable.

I so how she rolled her eyes once again.

“What’s with the long face?”

I look up meeting my sister eyes’, her eyes were narrowing.

“wae?”

“You seems not in your mood this past few days, something happened?”

“Nothing.”

“I heard Key transferred again?”

“Yep.”

“Ohhh!” formed a big shape O seems really amused over something.

And that’s really, really irritating.

“I heard Jiyeon asks him to come back.” Eunjung noona said, gaining all my attentions.

“Yeah. Aiiggooo! Those two. They seems really something?” Qri noona said,

“What do you think Jin?” Hyomin asks me.

I was shock, irritated at the same time, I cleared my throat as I fix my seating position, I lean my back more. Brows meet as they all anticipating for my answer.

Like what the heck right?

“I dunno” I look away, don’t wanna be bitter from their gossips.

“But you were the closest to the two. Except from the fact that you and Jiyeon almost fighting every day, but aside from that Key is your best friend” Qri noona exclaimed.

And I swear to God! Why I came here to the first place? I just wanted a peace of mind. Far away from their both. Far away from Jiyeon’s constant showing towards my head.

“I agree” Hyomin added.

“I don’t know okay?!” I hissed, crossing my arms towards my chest.

“I think Jiyeon likes Key” Hyomin seconded.

“but I doubt it”

My eyes turn to Eunjung noona, I saw how she winks on me.

“I think Jiyeon likes someone else.”

“huh? But that’s impossible, she was really—“

“trust me, Key isn’t the person she likes” Eunjung noona interrupted. She looks at me as if she was reading what I really thinking right now.

I gulp yet something in my chest lighten from what she said.

And true to his words, Key transferred in our school, though the idea  was good to me, but there is a part of me seems betraying me, each day, I saw how close the two of them become.

“Key!! Wait up” Jiyeon’s running towards him, “ouch!” she exclaimed, as she was trip on her own lace.

“Oh! Gwenchana?” Key runs towards her, helping her out.

Damn. I close my eyes seeing her winced in pain, But since she was Jiyeon, and Jiyeon is Jiyeon being clumsy is a usual thing to her.

I saw how Key help her to get up, he holds her wrist as they both walks slowly together. Why she have a weak bones? If I am the on her side, I will surely let her drinks a lots of lots of milk for her to have a strong bones! Damn!

But on the second thought, maybe I shouldn’t. so whenever she trip on her own recklessness, I will be the one who carry her each seconds passed.

Oh. Damn it Jinwoon! What the hell you were thinking?

“You like her do you?”

That was the question that even I to myself I can’t even asked. I blinks, gape like a fish trying to calm my heart that was beating fast, being interrogate like this was the first and I hate I can’t even lie in her front.

Eunjung noona smiled, a reassuring smiled that makes me calm a bit. “Don’t worry I won’t tell anyone”

I look down, feel embarrassed as I felt my cheeks blushed on an instant.

Eunjung noona smiled more, “and don’t worry, she didn’t like Key romantically, I assure you that.” She winks. “I prefer you and her. I am shipped with you two” she smiled. Teasingly. “So stops annoying her just to get her attention and be a man okay? Court her. Officially. I’ll help you” she said.

“wae?” I stutter. “I mean, Key is Seulong hyung’s younger brother, who’s your boyfriend, why are you helping me then?”

“You will know” she chuckled.

 For somehow, it was refreshing to know that someone supports you all the way, though I wasn’t sure if what she said is true.

Maybe Eunjung noona was right, I should start acting like a man.

“Do you have any gown to wear?”

I fix myself from seating as I heard them all talking, my sister same as her friends whom in senior year and Jiyeon in our junior year, yeah. J.S prom is near to come and yet I still have no courage to ask her to be my date.

Like seriously she would agree in the first place.

“Uhhmmm.. I don’t have any. Mom wanted to customized my gown” she pouted.

I raised my eyebrow for my amusement. Image of her wearing the gown comes play in my mind. Surely she will be so beautiful that day.

“do you have a partner?”

I turn my head and saw Eunjung noona looking at my direction.

Damn. Please say no. please say no. please.

You don’t have right. You don’t have right?

“Uhhmm..” she paused thinking. “No. I don’t have”

“YES!” I shouted almost jumping on my seat.

Boram noona and the rest looks at me.

I swear, I really looks like an idiot for sure.

“What happen to you?” Boram

They all eyebrows furrowing.

“Nothing!” as I pretended that I was busy with my phone.

“Maybe the girl she ask to be his date agreed” Qri noona giggled.

I saw Jiyeon frowned she looks down, seems really disappointed.

I didn’t know since when I realized I like her, or maybe even the first time we met, I know that I really like her

Maybe, I misinterpret my rudeness towards her into something.

Now, I know reason why—

I was dying for her attention that was the thing sure from that. I was longing for her attention, I wanted her to see me too.

Things that she didn’t failed to give to Key that time.

And from that I started hating that fact.

But should I step my feet forward? Should I give myself a try?

“AAHHH!!”

Baammm..

“KEYY!!!”

I just there, watch her as she went near to Key, we were in the middle of basketball tournament. Each of our friends came approached to us.

Yes, we were in the finals, and we both wanted to win badly. It seems in the middle of  life and death to the both of us.

It was my team versus Key’s team. I saw how she hurriedly runs towards the middle, seeing her so much worried to him, breaks my heart more.

“Are you okay?”

Oh yeah. He’s not. We both slams to each other right? But are you not going to asks me too?

“Jin—you okay?” Changmin hyung asks.

But my eyes fix to them, I twisted my ankle, it’s badly hurt, but the pain in my chest was too much to handle. Unknowingly I shook my head. I don’t know now what hurts more.

To see her runs to him first?

Or this ankle of mine.

I stood up, not wanting to see this damn thing in my front,

“Hey Jin!!” they called

Even in aching foot I feeling it’s nothing compared to this heart that is bleeding. Now I know, my heart is hurting more than this stupid feet I have.

Diversion.

That was what I need. I need to divert all my attention, coz I know if I don’t do this, surely I will end up being crazy.

Crazy all over for her.

I tried everything. Just to forget how much it hurts that she can’t see me.

And the first thing I did was to start not approaching her.

“Jin—you want to come in Taecyeon’s?” Boram noona one time asks me.

“nope. Busy” I simply said.

“Jin—let’s go! We have to pick Jiyeon” Key told me.

“pass! I have band rehearsal” I said.

And that was continuously going. How luckily I maintained that from weeks. But surely, just like from the start, just like how gravity pulled anything—

She knows exactly how to pulled me

Way back to her

“Jinwoon!!” Jun Hee hugs me so tight.

I saw from my peripheral vision how Jiyeon’s furrowed, she seems pissed. But why?

“Who is she? That girl who is she?” one time she confronted me. she looks annoyed, her eyebrows furrowed, she looks at me intensely. Demanding.

“So what?” I said, hiding the amusement and glimpse of hope from how she acted.

Please…

Do you like me too?

“I’m asking! Is she is your girlfriend or what?” she said almost her voice were raising in pitch.

“Is none of your business” I said. Restraining myself from pulling her to a hug.

Is she jealous? Damn baby. Please say yes.

I saw how her eyes reddened, she sniff as she walks out to me.

And what was that now?

“Jin—you like Jiyeon”

It was Key who said that. It was a statement rather than a question.

“I know you like her” he added.

“so what now? It doesn’t matter anyway, she don’t like me” I said, turning my head in opposite direction of him not wanting how I look right now.

“Silly—“ he chuckled.

“Wae?” I asks. “it’s so obvious how she hated me to the bones and besides—she seems to like you” I said almost whispering the last part.

“Idiot! Tss… how come your so numb?” he said. “Tell her what you feeling kay? Don’t be so damn chicken!”

“This song is for—“ I paused, I saw her right in the middle of the crowd, she was looking at me, I sighed, I gulped, now I started to feel nervous because of her presence in my front.

Damn. Baby. Don’t look at me like that.

“jinwoon! We loved you!!”

I saw how her face turns to the person who shouted that. She looks annoyed. She even glared at them.

And I chuckled. Baby. You making me weak. You turning my knees into jelly.

“This song is for you—my one and only” I said, looking straight to her eyes.

I heard how the crowd started screaming. They all shouting. But my eyes were focus to her just only her.

Yes. Baby. Look at me. This is really for you.

If I lay here—

If I just lay here

Would you lie with me?

And just forget the world?

From the last words of our last song, my eyes glued on her, I was about to go down to her—asks her for the most important question running in my mind.

Each step, each step I did for her, it feels like eternity. Just when I was about to go nearer on her, I felt a warm hug envelopes me.

“Jin--- you’re so great”

Junhee hugs me, blocking my way towards her. I saw her runs, she runs away to me.

No please. Not now.

No. I wouldn’t let her.

Run to me now.

Just like how the magnets work, I came rushing to her.

She’s my positive attraction.

And I am her negative one. I’m sure of that.

“Hey!”

“YAH!”

“why did you run?” I asks.

She was still looking down.

“so what if I run?” she said not still looking at me.

Damn baby. What are you doing to me right now?

“Hey! C’mon! Look at me!”

“Shiruh!”

“Ji—“

“No I don’t”

I saw her eyes watery, damn. She is crying. But why? Please baby. Stop crying. .

“Why are you crying?”

“why do you care? Just go back to your Junhee!” she hissed.

Damn baby are you jealous?

Damn.

Damn.

Damn.

“hey tell me! why are you crying?”

She sniffs. I can’t stand this. I can’t take this. I pulled her to me, closing her to my arms as I hug her so tight. Damn. I’m been longing for this. I’ve been wanting this for so long.

“Tell me what the matter is?”

She shook her head. Damn how hard headed girl.

Please tell me…

Please tell me…

“Just go back to Junhee, you sing a song to her! Just—“

Tell me your jealous baby. Tell me.

Damn. What on earth she thinks that’s that for Junhee? How numb isn’t it? I was looking at her o the entire time. Was I right?

I chuckled. Damn. It feels so gay. But she looks like a jealous girlfriend to me. How I wished.

“why are you laughing!” she pushed me. but I pulled her again.

“Silly! Are you really that numb? That song—that was—that was for you, you idiot!”

Jiyeon looks shocked, she looks at me with eyes widening.

“Park Jiyeon—I—“ I paused, I feels like something was in my throat. “I like you—can I court you?”

And that how everything started to us.

That’s how everything became an us.

She was my everything, I am sure she was. I can’t live without here. I can’t stand being without her. She’s mine. Mine alone.

“Yes! I will marry you” she said in tears.

I carried her in my arms and started spinning her in delight.

Damn. See? My dreams coming true.

She’s going to marry me!

We spent forever together.

She’s really mine

Mine forever not until that day—

Not until I started wondering her love towards mine.

“are you sure about this?”

I saw how Jiyeon looks at Key that time,

Jiyeon looks at him weakly, though I don’t want to conclude something, I know, she hiding something to me. and I hate it.

“is there something you hiding to me Key?”

I asked one time, I don’t know, but something is strange and I know it well.

Jiyeon, my jiyeon was not in her usual self. I’m sure of it.

“hiding what?” he snaps. As if he didn’t know what am I asking.

“Jiyeon is little bit weird—“

“oohhh! Wedding jitters I think?”

“Tsss” I punch him lightly making him chuckled.

“What?” he innocently asks.

“nothing, it just”

Should I asks him?

Why him?

My doubts doubled and doubled, though how much restraint myself from it, but my doubts becomes stronger

“where are you going Ji?”

“Uhhmm.. I have plans with unnies” she smiled though her smiles telling something.

I knew it.

“Okay—you want me to drive you there?”

“ohh—no need”

No. my Jiyeon wouldn’t tell a lie to me. I know it. I want to believe it.

I just watch her walk away, coz I know, even how many times she walks away on me. I;m still the one she choose to comeback with.

“Ohh Jin? Where’s Jiyeon?” my sister asks me.

“Huh? I thought you have plans? Girls night out?”

“night out? We don’t have plans with—you sure?”

I gulped. Not because of what she said but the idea why she lied to me.

No she didn’t.

“Jin—can you just go alone to the organizer?”

“Why? I thought we go together?”

“I have something to do. Can you just do it?” she said not giving any eye contact.

But lies become more and more

“where have you been Ji? Noona told me you didn’t went to the final fitting”

“Ohh—“ she looks away. “Well—“

“she came with me Jin” Key said as he went inside. He smiled. “well you know, last bonding before I fly to states.”

I saw Jiyeon’s become hesitant, bothered and nervous for I don’t know the reason why behind.

This is nothing right?

I am just overthinking.

Not until that day.

“Jiyeon hiding something to me” I said as I drink the beer in my hand, I looks at my