There really was no need for her to stand five meters away from him, but that was how it was. She knew she recognized that familiar back. Now, she wished she hadn't blurted out his name. Standing awkwardly apart from each other wasn't what she wanted to do now. It was rather too late to just ignore him and head straight to the shops, but talking to him was also the last thing on her mind at that time. The same stinging of hurt from their fight earlier tugged her heart. Even so, she was dying to ask him what are you doing here? Aren't you cold? Here, put my beanie on. You should know heat escapes through the head. 

Shifting her gaze away from him, she wondered to herself why it was so hard.

Why was it so hard for her to shut him off. It was pretty darn easy with the other guys--ignoring them as if they never existed in her life. Having one hurt your heart makes it easier to forget that person. Didn't seem to be the case here though. She knew she was mad at him and who cares if he feels cold anyway?

I do.. I do. 

Heaving a deep sigh, she nodded to him out of curtesy and continued walking ahead. Instantly, she heard him making his way up to her and waited for him to maybe pull on her arms or turn her to face him, but no--nothing happened. So, she just continued walking, clutching onto her purse tighter, wondering why he was following her but not talking to her. 

They walked passed a few streets as it got totally dark. The neihbourhood was generally a quiet one. The streets were quiet and rarely a passer-by was seen. What more on a quiet and cold night like this--where it was said that the first snow was to fall tonight. 

Mi Ra bit her lips. They were nearing the grocery store and she didn't want him to be there with her. It was almost certain that the grocer ajuhssi was going to ask her to pay up last week's debt. That would be humiliating if Kyuhyun were to hear that. She knows that Kyuhyun knows about her unfortunate financial problems, but letting others hear about it from somebody else is too humiliating to bear. 

She had to stop him from following her. 

"Ahh~" 

A small gasp escaped from her own self. She had turned to face him a little bit too abruptly that she didn't realize he was right behind her. Almost crashing into each other, she stumbled a few steps back and gave him a glare. 

There wasn't a prominent show of emotion on his face. However, he did seemed to be calm, despite the fact that they nearly had their first kiss  on the lips and that would have been an awesome story to be told--Your umma and I had our first kiss the day we fought for the first time. A silly grin appeared on his face, imagining how it would be like to have a family with her. 

Well, for Mi Ra, that silly grin had done it for her. Like an ice queen, she asked him, "what. are. you. doing?"

Seeing Mi Ra unfaltered from her state of anger, the grin on his face immediately vanished.

He got it now. This was serious . This wasn't some minor bickering. The look on her face was telling Kyuhyun that this isn't the time to joke around. 

"I'm-- following yo--"

"Why?"

He didn't even get to finish his sentence when Mi Ra rushed to cut in. 

"Why are you following me?" she asked again. 

I'm so sorry, baby. I shouldn't have imposed those thoughts onto you. It was my fault I wasn't aware of your being. Forgive me, forgive me, please.. was what he wanted to say to her, but his silence gave her more space to cut in.

"Why are you following a scrooge like me?"

"No.." he almost whispered. "Don't say that.." he livelessly uttered, feeling his soul had been away, hearing her say those things to herself. 

He took a step towards her and stopped when she told him to get away from her. She was hurt, and it wasn't something to be joking about. Mi Ra had countlessly reminded herself to not cry in front of him, how ever hard it may be. So far, she was doing fine by forcing harsh words to come out of her subtle mouth, making her heart stiff and hard.

"Tch.." she smirked and looked away from him. "I am a scrooge. Do you think I would rather spend all my hard earned cash on lavish clothes and branded handbags? Noo.. I'm too much of a scrooge to even spend for myself. What makes you think I'd spend for others? I'm too afraid I would run out of money. I'm so much of a scrooge--I was even afraid my own boyfriend was going to run out of money."

"Enough with the sarcasm," he said. He heard enough. And from what had happened today, he learnt new stuff about her. About his own girlfriend. And he believes that it made him understand her just a little bit more. But Mi Ra didn't have to go about and downgrade herself like that. He won't allow that. He took another step closer to her. 

"What sarcasm, Kyuhyun ssi?" she put up her hand, telling him to not come closer to her. But that 'Kyuhyun ssi' irked him even more. 

"I said stop it," his voice getting lower and he took another step forward. 

"Stop? Stop what?! Being a scrooge? I--" 

"I said geu man hae!!" he yelled as he moved forward and captured her into his embrace.

No sounds were coming from her but Kyuhyun could feel her fidget, struggling to free herself from him. But Kyuhyun wasn't a weakling. Heck, she didn't even stand a chance to withdraw, with his arms wrapped around her securely like that. So she gradually stopped moving. 

"Stop. Don't say those things to yourself. You're not that at all. You're not.." he breathed into her hair, tightening his embrace around her, like he was never letting go. He could feel her warm breath against his chest. It was rather calm. 

"Thank you..".

Kyuhyun frowned. He heard it clearly even though it sounded muffled against his chest. 

"I promise... I'll pay you back.." she sqeaked and Kyuhyun hushed her as he her long black hair. 

"Don't. Don't pay me back. I don't want it," he hurriedly said and he let Mi Ra go when he felt her retreat from him. "I did it because I wanted to," he explained himself before Mi Ra asked him to. "I just wanted to do it for you. I'm asking you to understand that now. Know that my actions mirror what I feel for you. Please."

Looking down, she slowly shook her head.

"Kyuhyun.." she called onto him, like a whisper escaped from her. It took a lot of courage for her to look up and gaze into his eyes. Those eyes she had grown to be addicted to. Just looking at it made her happy, what more knowing that they were looking at her as well.

Kyuhyun couldn't help but feel a slight tug as he looked into her eyes. They were full of sorrow. 

"No.. don't say it." he shook his head, silently pleading her to not say what he thinks she was about to say. 

The moment she closed her eyes, a single tear rolled down from it. 

"Baby, no.. please, don't," he placed his thumb to wipe them away. "Give us a chance. We need time."

She nodded, agreeing to what he said and Kyuhyun felt relieved.

..for like two seconds.

"We need time to understand each other. You--need time to understand me. I'm a complicated mess, Kyu. Time will reveal that. and when you learned who I am.." she paused to look at him again. "Maybe then, you could decide whether you want me in your life-- or not."

"What?" he asked her, thinking he understood what she said but finding it hard to believe it. He placed his hands onto her shoulder and squeezed it. "What are you saying? Y-you don't want me?" he tried to look closer into her eyes, looking for answers. 

She smiled a simple smile and held onto his hands to bring them down. She held both of his hands. "Let's just be friends first," she said and he immediately shook his head, pouting. She pinched his cheeks and he just loved the way she touched him. 

"But I don't want to be just friends.." he muttered. 

"I'm asking you learn to know me first. I don't want us to fight like today anymore. I have a lot of things going on in my life, Kyu. And I want you to let time work it's way and you will know them sooner or later. I just can't tell you everything now. Until then, we'll just be friends. Good friends," she smiled and let go of his hands, leaving him dumbfounded. 

He swore to burn all those H2H notes he had been keeping. F#ck those love tips. Non of them are right. 

Who was he trying to kid? He understood clearly and perhaps agreed with Mi Ra, that they probably rushed into things. Being friends, good friends with her couldn't be a bad idea, could it? 

"So.. I've been friendzoned by you?" he asked with a bitter smile upon his lips. She smiled too and nodded, thinking the hell of a day it was. They were too intoxicated with love to think about the big picture. Deep down, Mi Ra was glad that he was still willing to be friends with her. 

The sound of iron rumbbling was heard from a distance. 

"Crap! The store's closing!" and she ran all the way to the grocery store before it had been completely closed. 

"Ahh Mi Ra ya.. Just in time. What should I get you?" the ajuhssi asked and she told him what she needed. Kyuhyun stepped into the shop just in time when the ajuhssi disclosed the amount she had to pay. 

"Ohh. Maja. Byungchul hyung asked me to give you this," he said as he rummaged through his bag and took out the white envelope. Mi Ra took it from him asked what was inside. "See for yourself," he shrugged and went to the back of the store to get himself a drink. 

A smile slowly appeared on her face. Thank god.. Just what I needed. She asked the ajuhssi how much she had to pay , including her debts from before and happily paid. 

***

He looked to his side to observe the happy lady walking beside him, smiling all the way, swinging the bag of groceries. "Careful miss, unless you wanna break those eggs," he chuckled. Being a friend is so hard! All he wanted to do now was link his arms with her and hold her close, perhaps sneaking a kiss or two. Damn, why did I agreed to be just friends?! It was driving him nuts. 

"Ohh. Thanks for reminding me I bought eggs. I'm so happy I actually forgot about them," she giggled, as she clutched onto the bag protectively. Kyuhyun could only smile as he observed her. As long as you are happy, then I guess I'll be happy too, baby. 

"Why do you need so much stuff anyways? Are you cooking something special tonight? Can I come and eat?" he wiggled his brows. 

"Noo.. !! I mean--no, these aren't for tonight," she gave a reassuring look to the frowning Kyuhyun. Gosh, why are you being more adorable than before? It's killing me. "It's Sehunnie's birthday tomorrow. I'm baking him a cake."

"Ohh? Really? Sehunnie is what-- three tomorrow?" he asked, full of interest and Mi Ra nodded. She told her how Sehun has been pestering her to buy a cake and she thinks that baking one would be a bit cheaper and more sentimental. She nodded again, satisfied with her own reasoning--looking a bit too cute for Kyuhyn to handle. 

He wrapped an arm around her and messed up her hair, saying, "don't act all cute in front of me. I'm still adjusting to the friend zone."

"Yah~" she whined, shrugging him off of her as they neared her house. "I'm adjusting too.." she said softly and he smiled in reply, as they stood outside her front door.

"So, this is it.." he shoved his hands into his pockets and shrugged. 

"Yeah, this is it," she tucked her hair behind her ears, thinking that Kyuhyun was the one who always did that for her. Did she already miss him and his loving gestures?

"Can I call you whenever I want to call you?" he gazed at her longingly and she nodded. "Can I see you whenever I want to see you?" he asked again and she hesitated a little before she nodded. Kyuhyun suddenly grabbed her wrist and rolled up the sleeves and smiled to see her wearing the charm bracelet he gave. "Keep on wearing that to remind you that I am waiting for that day when I can have you as mine again," he slid the back of his fingers across her cheeks and winked before he left with a goodbye. 

She followed the back of him with her eyes and soons as she cannot see  him any more, she sat down, her face burried into her palms.

Her shoulders were shaking. 

"Please, accept me, no matter how flawed I am.. I love you so much.."