So, is this love?

What is love?

That’s a question I ask myself the most.

How does it feel? Does it feel good? Is it as sweet as the movies describe it?

I don’t really know because I never really felt it.

I wonder when I’ll find the answer.

“Myungsoo, I’m going to visit my father this week end, would you like to come?”

“Of course.”

Myungsoo always comes with Byunghun whenever he visits his father. He was close to Byunghun’s father already, and he always takes them around whenever they visit.

“I’m also planning on asking Sohyun to come with us. I want to introduce her to my father.”

Myungsoo’s smile suddenly fell. It was his only bonding time with Byunghun, something only the two of them experiences and he can’t accept someone else to be a part of it.

“I don’t think it’s a good a good idea.” Myungsoo answered.

“Why?” Byunghun looked at him with a confused expression.

“Our trips to your father had always been an ‘all boys day out’. It’s going to be awkward with a girl.”

“You think so?”

Myungsoo nodded.

“Ok, I’ll just ask her next time.”

Myungsoo grinned. Byunghun finally prioritized him, more than Sohyun.

“Dad!”

Byunghun ran towards his father and hugged him.

“Been a while, son.”

Myungsoo bowed and greeted Mr. Lee.

“Dad, where will you take us today?” Byunghun asked with sparkling eyes.

“To the beach. The weather is really good today. I don’t want to waste such a beautiful weather.”

Byunghun and Myungsoo smiled at each other. The two of them always liked swimming.

Their day was filled with the bright, hot sun and the warm water. They played all day at the beach. It was very fun, especially for Myungsoo who was very deprived of Byunghun’s attention these past weeks.

They had so much fun they didn’t even notice that the day was ending already. Because it was too late to travel, so they decided to just stay for the night.

“Hey, Byunghun, are you still awake?” Myungsoo peaked at Byunghun’s blanket.

“Yes.”

“I miss these times.”

“Huh? What times?”

“Times that we are together.”

“But we’re always together at school.”

“But we don’t bond like this anymore.”

“Huh? We don’t?” Byunghun furrowed his eyebrows.

“Yes. We stopped bonding when you started to have a girlfriend.”

“Really? I’m sorry, it’s the first time someone from the opposite appreciated me, so I forgot about the other things, I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok. But Byunghun, do you love Sohyun.”

Even though it was dark, Myungsoo could see Byunghun’s blush.

“Yes, I love her.”

“How did you know it was love?”

“Hmm, I always want to be with her all the time, I had this strong urge to protect her from all the dangers of this world, like she was my most precious treasure, and I also feel extremely jealous and hurt whenever she’s acting sweet with another guy. I pretty much figured out that it was love myself. Love can only be determined with one’s self, nobody but you, yourself.”

Myungsoo didn’t answer for a while.

“So, is that love?”

But Byunghun didn’t answer. When Myungsoo peaked at Byunghun’s blanket again, he was already soundly asleep.

So, is that love?

Another question that has no definite answer. And a question that I don’t know when would be answered.

Is Byunghun’s definition of love true? Is that love?

But he said the only person who can answer my question is I, myself.

Should I just wait for the right time?

After their vacation, Byunghun started to pay more attention to him again.

Byunghun and Sohyun also had a little fight because Byunghun didn’t come with her to somewhere, which gave Myungsoo and Byunghun more time alone.

“Myungsoo, what should I do to make Sohyun forgive me?”

“Flowers and sincere apology. That's what they do in movies.” Myungsoo answered.

“You think it’s effective?”

“I don’t know, I’m inexperienced here, remember?”

Byunghun sighed.

“I guess I have to try.”

Myungsoo didn’t see Byunghun after class. He got worried, so he searched for him around the school.

He found him sitting on a bench with Sohyun with a banquet of flowers in her hands.

When Myungsoo was just about to approach them, they kissed.

According to Byunghun, love is when you want to be with that person all the time.

I want to be with Byunghun all the time.

He said love is when you want to protect that person, like your most precious treasure.

I always want to protect Byunghun ever since we started being friends; I always wanted to protect him from his other bullies.

He said love is when you feel extremely jealous and hurt whenever that person is acting sweet with another person.

I already accepted that I was jealous before, and just now, I was hurt when they kissed.