Don't Go

He sighs.

“That’ll be ten thousand won...”

The man with cat-like eyes looks up at the cashier, who looks like he lost a million dollar bet. He would’ve stayed to try to cheer up the man who is usually always cheerful when greeting his customers, but Kris is waiting for his Shin Ramen and the Sampgyeopsal he just bought, so he couldn’t afford to keep him waiting. He wouldn’t want to keep his beloved man hungry, would he? Besides he knows his boyfriend gets really hungry when he gets mad. A ruckus just happened in their workplace that got his boyfriend boiling to his limit. He must hurry and stay by Kris’ side.

He looks at the cashier as the man weakly punches the cashier register and takes out the change.

“Thank you, come again, Sir,” he says weakly, almost like a murmur.

“Thank you,” he smiles at the man, even though the man doesn’t look at him, and walks out of the store.

+ + +

Kyungsoo heaves a long, heavy sigh.

He didn’t come today.

He sighs again as he slumps on the counter, folding his arms as he buries his head in it. This is the first time he didn’t arrive ever since Kyungsoo started working on the store. He always arrives. Always. He can be late, but never later than 8 in the morning.

He lifts his head to look at the digital clock. It’s almost nine. He buries his head back into his arms. I should stop hoping the he will show up, really. Kyungsoo groans. But it’s been a week! Waiting for a week is already torture to him, what more for two weeks now that he didn’t show up?

‘DING!’

It’s the sound of the automatic door signaling the arrival of a new customer that has Kyungsoo, weakly (and maybe even hatefully), standing straight and waiting for the customer. He blanches at the sight in front of him.

It is a sight that Kyungsoo has never imagined, for he never really wants to, to see. In a matter of seconds, Kyungoo can feel the same pain from 2 years ago coming back all over again. The fear he feels is just as strong as how he felt two years ago. His eyes are wide open in fear and it feels like the world became mute, only the sound of the coffee maker machine brewing can be heard in slow motion.

“Jongin...” The only word that comes out of Kyungsoo’s lips is the name of the man standing in front of him, clasping his stomach, as he painstakingly staggers his way into the store.

“No…” Series of memories flash in Kyungsoo’s head; everything seems like a déjà vu.

“Jongin-sshi…” Kyungsoo’s feet are on autopilot as they take two small steps out of the counter space, still hoping that he’s just imagining things right now.

“No…” He blinks his eyes slowly with a huge gulp, his pulse racing, hoping that he’s just imagining everything he is seeing. He opens his eyes again. But it’s still there. The blood dripping, the pained look on the man’s face, everything…it all seems too real.

Kyungsoo suddenly feels too cold.

The man isn’t even half way through the aisle when Kyungsoo, who still hasn’t moved from his frozen position, sees in what seems like slow motion, the man trying to get a hold of something to support himself and falling when he can’t.

It’s then that Kyungsoo realizes it’s all true.

“No, no, no, no, no, no!” Kyungsoo starts screaming as he runs towards the man in a matter of seconds; he immediately falls to his knees and lifts the man’s head onto his lap.

“Kim Jongin-sshi! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up Kim Jongin! No please wake up!” Kyungsoo starts lightly tapping the man’s face, but to no avail; the man doesn’t move. He doesn’t open his eyes. Kyungsoo can feel his blood draining as he checks the pulse of the man who looks too pale, and can’t feel anything. He cries because he’s not even sure if there really is nothing or if he just can’t find it in panic.

“No, please!” Kyungsoo screams again, his sight getting blurry as tears stream down his cheeks. “Please, no, wake up!”

The panic and fear has taken over Kyungsoo as he scrambles, grasping the bloody body of the man, unable to think clearly and completely forgetting all the training he had received in his 3 years of being a doctor. He begins to sob, sniffling, and pathetically trying to apply pressure on the man’s wound that he has just discovered.

He screams for the man to wake up. He checks his pulse. Nothing. His mind is blurry. He can’t think of anything except for the thought of saving the man lying unconscious.

He screams and screams and screams. Fear completely takes him over. He screams for the man once more, but nothing. He receives no reply. Just like two years ago. When the man he loved the most left him in this world.

Please don’t leave.

ㅠㅠ