Band-Aids

Spring time has come. The sun is shining brightly outside the little convenience store. Birds are chirping, the flowers have beautifully blossomed and the smell of the damp earth during the spring has once again arrived. These are the things that Kyungsoo usually would notice when the first day of spring arrives.  But this day, he does not notice any of those.

Leaning his forearm on the counter, Kyungsoo buries his face in his hands.

It’s been four weeks.

 It’s been four weeks since the last time he had heard from his best friend, or seen that man. He isn’t even sure if he is actually hoping for something that could happen. Not after what happened the last time. He has always been a hopeful person. His profession includes bringing hope to others, giving them hope for an extension of a life that could possibly end. But not right now. He could not be hopeful about something he knows isn’t trying to survive in the first place. What was he actually hoping for in the first place? Kyungsoo puts his hands down. Just to be noticed? To get to know the man more?

 He bitterly scoffs at himself.

What he is feeling is obviously a one-sided thing. He knows that. Why is he being stupid, actually hoping for something he knows won't happen? 

Why, why, why.

The same thing goes for his best friend, who only called him once two weeks ago. He will never understand the business world that his best friend deals with. It’s all complicated numbers and dealings. This is why he took a medical course; to stay away from numbers. How busy could he be that he is not even allowed to make calls? Sometimes he finds himself thinking maybe his best friend is busy with that Sehun person that he likes. He might actually feel jealous about that.

It would have been nice if Luhan was here with him. At least even though Luhan would only keep on teasing him about being love struck, he would always try to comfort him after. And at times like this, when his heart is being torn into pieces, Luhan is the best person to turn to. Luhan always knows how to deal with people’s feelings. Sometimes he even thinks that his best friend knows his heart more than he, the owner, does.

He misses the presence of his best friend.

Sighing, Kyungsoo opens the drawer underneath the counter and takes out a leather notebook. It’s been so long since the last time he wrote down something. He just got so excited about the sudden turn of events, thinking that he could finally get to know that man more.

 But he was wrong. So wrong. He only got his hopes up for nothing.

 He turns the pages and starts reading them. His brows crease at what he reads. How stupid everything he writes sounds to him right now. Two years and he hoped for some stupid thing. Maybe he should just stop hoping.

No. Not just maybe. He should.

He is a doctor. He gives his patients hope when he knows there is something to hope for. But he also knows when to stop hoping for that one thing. He knows when it’s the end.

Right now is the end.

+ + +

And in that exact moment, Kyungsoo looks up and an image of the man he has been thinking of comes into view. Kyungsoo blinks. It is a latent image of that man who’s been stuck in his head for several years now, and it seems so real. It has the same expressionless face the man always wears. The image stares back at Kyungsoo and it makes him want for that image to stay longer. Because it looks so real that Kyungsoo wants to believe that the man is really present. As if that certain person is really there.

The image looks down. Kyungsoo sighs but continues to stare it.

It is when the man starts walking towards him that Kyungsoo stands up straight.

Is this real?

The image stops in front of the counter, still looking down. He is so close and Kyungsoo almost wantes to poke it just to make sure it’s really real and not a product of his imagination.

But then the man looks up at him and Kyungsoo’s breath hitches. His eyes widen.

He’s real.

The man looks up at Kyungsoo and for a few seconds, their eyes are glued to each other. Kyungsoo cannot believe it. The man is real.

“W-What can I help you with, s-sir?”

Kyungsoo is stammering. It’s the natural effect this certain man has on him. Stuttering everything he says is normal when it’s directed towards Kim Jongin.

The man looks away, pausing for a second before looking back at Kyungsoo, then looking away again. Kyungsoo watches in absolute worry as the man inhales and then slowly exhales.

“I—” the man starts and Kyungsoo gulps. The man is real. And he can hear his voice. That deep voice he’s only heard a few times. “Do you perhaps sell Band-Aids here?”

There is a ringing in Kyungsoo’s head. The world seems to be in slow motion and it takes a few nerve-racking moments before Kyungsoo is able to register what the man said to him.

“B-band-Aid?” he repeats, with eyes still wide.

The man takes a quick glance at him before looking down again and the second their eyes meet, Kyungsoo feels electricity travelling all through his body, making his heartbeat increase to a pace he knows is not healthy.

“I—” Kyungsoo looks at the right side of the store in panic. “We—” he looks to the other side again. He curses in his head because his brain is not working properly and he cannot seem to formulate the words that he wants to say. He scampers for the right words to say, but his mind is blank. It only has one thing registering in it: Kim Jongin is in front of me.

It’s when the man looks up at him and gives him that expecting look that his brain clicks together.

“I-I’m sorry sir, we’ve ran out of Band-Aids as of the moment,” his voice is shaky and Kyungsoo wanted to bang his head onto the table for making it too obvious.

The man is staring at him and it’s making it very hard for him to dwindle down his panicking heart.

“Oh,” is the first thing the man says. “Okay. Thank you,” he says before turning around. Kyungsoo panics even more. He is leaving again! He is going to disappear again and what if he does not come back ever again?

“B-but s-sir!” Kyungsoo bites the inside of his cheek because his voice cracks. He’s seeing the man after four weeks and all he does is make the man’s impression of him go worse.

The man turns around and looks at him.

“I. We. I mean I have Band-Aids here, sir. If you want I can give you one—“, and Kyungsoo does not wait for an answer and crouches down, almost hitting his head on the edge of the counter in the process, but he doesn't notice and hastily opens the drawer, looking for the medicine kit. Kyungsoo is nervous and panicking at the presence of the man, and he makes clattering noise as medicine bottles get knocked over in his haste to find the kit. It doesn’t take long before Kyungsoo pops out in the man’s view again with a stash of Band-Aids in hand.

“Y-you can have this, s-sir…” Kyungsoo says in his extremely shaky voice that almost sounds as if he is scared of the man. He slowly stretches his hand over to hand the Band-Aid to the man, hands still shaking a little. Kyungsoo bites hard on the inside of his lower lip as he stares at his own hand.

Silence fills the air and Kyungsoo gulps the lump in his throat as he looks up at the man, who only stares at his outstretched hand holding the Band-Aid, as if deciding if he should or should not take it. Kyungsoo’s heart twists in pain. Jongin is not going to take it. He doesn’t know why that hurts him. It’s just a Band-Aid. But it does hurt him.

The man then slowly begins to reach for it and Kyungsoo sees it happen, but in slow motion. The man reaches for the stash of Band-aid and Kyungsoo’s heart races to a pace he thinks should not be possible; he instantly becomes worried that the man may actually hear his heart beating loud and clear.

Kyungsoo, again, bites the inside of his lower lip to muffle the whimper that almost escapes him when the tip of the man’s thumb ever so slightly brushes over his. He knows it was not on purpose, but he feels his cheeks flaring up. He looks away.

“Thank you,” Kyungsoo hears the deep voice of the man again.

His gaze goes back to the man and their eyes meet. For the first time, Kyungsoo sees something else in the man’s eyes. There is warmth in them and he feels lost in those eyes that express no words but show everything that Kyungsoo could ask for.

“You’re welcome.”

And he watches as the man starts to walk backwards, their eyes still connected before he looks down and turns around, completely walking out of the store. Kyungsoo’s eyes trail after the man, watching his back as he disappears out of the store and outside, beyond the glass wall until he disappears out of sight.

Kyungsoo stays still for a moment, the memory of what happened playing over and over again in his head.

He didn’t buy a cup of coffee and ramen today.

“A Band-Aid.”

And that’s when Kyungsoo snaps out of his reverie. His eyes trail back to the intersection where the man disappeared to.

Is he hurt again?

A wave of anxiety hits Kyungsoo and he finds himself worrying for that man a little too much again.

A/N: Hi guys. hehe. I updated. It took so long huh.. Mian >.< and huehue I got new Banner, BG, and Poster. Isn't it PRETTYful. lol. SmileB made it for me. <3

word count: 1710