November 15, 2013

Ilana looked out the window that overlooked the hospital's main entrance. With a distracted smile on her face, she played with the necklace YoungSaeng had given her. Two weeks prior someone could have been looking out this same window onto her wonderful surprise; the scene replayed itself in her mind as if watching a movie. Where they stood, what they wore, what they said, she even remembered how wonderfully solid they felt when she hugged them. "Nun cham tek byeol hae (you are so special)." She spoke out loud, still wondering what that meant.

 - "Mworago?" Dr. Jaejoong had stumbled upon Ilana daydreaming and talking to herself. "Ilana-ssi is not going to get any work done talking to herself and staring out the window."

 - "Omo!" She would have crashed through the window had she not caught herself. Unfortunately, she stepped wrong causing her almost healed knee to send a painful message to her brain. "Ah! Dr. Jaejoong, must you sneak up on people?"

 - "Mianhae, gwenchana?" He placed a steadying hand on her arm while she reached down to massage her knee. 

 - "Yes, I just stepped wrong, I'll walk it off.”

 - "Did you just say ‘omo’? And what were you mumbling when I came up?"

 - "Oh," she didn't know what to say. "Um, I guess my friends’ words get stuck in my head occasionally. And I was just remembering something my friend told me, but I don't know what it means."

 - "If it's Korean, I can help. Come on, I'll walk you back to your desk and you can tell me the word you don't know. Just don't tell Noona or Dr. Jihoo I accidentally made you hurt yourself."

 - "I won't tell anyone," she smiled and shook her head at the sometimes childish Doctor. "But there's no way I'm telling you what my friend told me."

 - "Wae?"

 - "Because if it's something embarrassing, you'll tease me and tell everyone."

 - "Anieyo-o-o, tell me, juseyo?”

She raised her eyebrow at him.  "You think your aegyo is going to work on me?"

 - "If it does I'll try it on Abi." The mental image made Ilana laugh. "Yah and what do you know about aegyo, anyway?  Who else uses aegyo on you, ah?"

 - "Oh, I'd like to see you try your aegyo on Abigail;" she ignored his question and after a short pause, decided to tell him.  "Very well, I'll tell you." He was making the most ridiculous faces at her. "Nun cham tek byeol hae."

 - "The person who gave you that necklace with the heart pendant said that to you?"

 - "Yes, my friend did," she wore a wistful smile.

 - "Namja chingu?"

 - "Friend," she emphasized.

They stood right outside her unit, Jaejoong greeted his favorite admin.  "Annyeong, jagiya. Nun cham tek byeol hae," he said.  "You know, I've never said that to a woman before? And I mean it, jeongmal."

Shi-Yoon and Uee looked at each other and laughed.

 - "Hello! See...this is exactly why I didn't want to tell you." Ilana felt betrayed and angry. She could feel tears prickling; she took a deep breath to steady herself and stared at her monitor.

  - "Dr. Jaejoong, are you bothering Ilana? You know Unni's report is due Monday and I'm almost done. Can you behave long enough for me to finish?" Abigaíl had softened a little towards him. He liked Isabel so much, how could she not.

 - "I am behaving!" He glanced at Ilana and saw her stricken face. "Pabo," he thought. He said he wouldn't tease but he'd done just that. He'd forgotten how sensitive she was. "Mianhae, Ilana-ssi." He grabbed a post-it from her desk and wrote. "This is the answer to your question."

You are so special.

Ilana blushed when she read the tidy script on the yellow sticky note.

 - "Dr. Jaejoong, is there something I can help you with?" Abigail answered curtly, having returned her eyes to the screen in front of her.

 - "How's my little jagiya?" The mention of her daughter, made Abigaíl crack a smile.

 - "She's more of a little monkey than a sweetheart," sighing, she looked up from her screen.

 - "Yah! Dr. Jaejoong, we'll tell Noona you're bothering Ilana and Abigaíl." ShiYoon threatened playfully.

 - "Deh,” Jaejoong ignored the other two admins.  “I'll take you two sooo special yeoja to lunch next week.  When Jihoo gets back we'll have a double lunch date." He winked at them and band bowed.

 - "Dr. Jaejoong!" Both ladies yelled.

 - "Annyeong hasseyo, I have rounds to do.”

 - “Oh! Thank you for helping me with that," Ilana said before he walked away.  She turned back to her monitor to hide her flustered face.

 - "Gwenchana, glad I could help."

Shi-Yoon and Uee snickered quietly at their desks as Dr. Jaejoong walked away. They had a feeling his interest in Abigaíl was more than just a co-worker, even if he didn't realize it yet.

Jaejoong hated this time of month when Dr. Jihoo was gone and Abigaíl was chained to her desk doing reports. He could tease Ilana only so much. He had gone too far today, unfortunately. Even if she was much more relaxed since her days off, he still couldn't read her that well. Jihoo was much better at it than he was. He thought her boyfriend's visit must have put her at ease. That smile on her face when he came up to her said 'I have a secret'. He smiled at his conclusion and went about his business.

Jihoo had finished the monthly board meeting earlier that morning. Thankfully the board members were flexible and didn't mind coming in on Saturday. He had been greeted exuberantly by his Grandfather at the airport and had other foundation business to take care of. He smiled. Thanks to God and modern medicine, his Grandfather's heart had a new lease on life. Earlier in the year, he had undergone an experimental surgery. They had both sat down and weighed the consequences and decided to proceed and trust in God. Now, he was back to doing all the things he loved. Poor JanDi and the rest of F4 (the name by which he and his friends were called) couldn't keep up with him.

Jihoo's mind wandered as he went over reports and charts in order to determine next year's budget for the small chain of clinics his Grandfather and JanDi ran. His mind inadvertently went back to his admin and reviewed what he had learned so far. She was stubborn, he found that out her first week when she tried to carry all those food trays by herself. Her friend even confirmed it. She had a brother; he wondered if her brother helped her with expenses. She had a very interesting degree in a field she wasn't working in; something must have happened at her previous employer to make her strike out on her own. She had a Grandmother back home (he assumed that's what she meant by Nana). She got headaches often; he figured she was worse than JanDi when they were at Shinhwa High School and University together. JanDi did not have the means to eat properly but he was quite sure that was not the case with Ilana.

 - "Sunbae, I'm going to order lunch, begopayo?" Jan-Di had walked into the office.

 - "Oh, Ilana-ssi, I mean, JanDi-ah...mianhae, my mind is at the hospital." He busied his gaze on the report in front of him so as to not look at JanDi. "Are you ordering from the porridge shop?"

 - "Deh, I'll order your usual."

There weren't any patients at the moment; JanDi and Jihoo were able to eat their lunch in relative quiet. Of course, it was never completely quiet with JanDi around.

 - "Sunbae, who is Ilana-ssi? Sunbae hasn't mentioned that name before."

 - "Chincha?" He tried to sound natural, careful not to be the cause of any speculation. "Nae admin at the hospital, wae?"

 - "Anieyo, just curious." JanDi was the only one who could really read him, other than Woo-Bin, who was a close second. "Do I remind you of her?"

Her eyes lit up with her laugh.  Jihoo couldn’t help it; Guam JanDi would always have a special place in his heart.  "Ilana-ssi reminds me of Guam JanDi, she's always getting into trouble." He reached out and gave her braid a quick tug. Despite the sometimes awkward feelings, their friendship was still strong. She looked to him as an older brother, her guide, her fireman.  No matter what his feelings were towards her.

 - "Sunbae!!! I haven't gotten into trouble since Shinhwa," Jihoo could always make her feel like they were back in high school and med school again.

 - "That's only because JanDi’s overprotective nampyon has some of WooBin's (Second in command to South Korea's Royal mafia family) best men follow your every move," Jan Di smiled at the thought of her overgrown child/husband. Jihoo was also happy for her. She was a successful doctor, married to a great man (the Shinhwa Group heir), who loved her and the mother of a beautiful little girl that thankfully had JanDi's personally, not her father's.

 - "I hope she has great chingu and a great fireman like I do."

 - "I believe she does." Did she have room for one more? That was the unspoken question between them.

The F4 and significant others gathered at the Gu family’s mansion later that night. WooBin, his fiancé JaeKyung, and YiJeong (a successful potter, heir the country's biggest museum) were shooting pool. JunPyo and Jihoo played with two-year-old InHei.

Jan Di and her best friend, GaEul, who is also YiJeong's wife, had been in the kitchen helping the staff prepare snacks for the group of friends and walked into InHei’s screeching giggles.

 - "Yah, InHei Appa (Gu JunPyo) don't get her so excited right before bedtime; she won't go to sleep," JanDi scolded her husband.

 - "Gwenchana, Ajussi Jihoo is here, he always gets her to go to sleep."

 - "Gwenchana, JanDi-ah, I'll put her to sleep in a little while." Jihoo actually enjoyed putting his little niece asleep. Usually, he played the guitar for her or the violin. Sometimes, he would sing her a song while he snuggled her on his lap. She lived up to her name; at three (two western years), she was a wise and graceful child. Being the first niece she was subject to everyone's attention and being JanDi’s child, she was adored by Jihoo. GaEul was due any day now; Jihoo viewed YiJeong kissing his wife and placing his hand over her swollen belly. Who would have thought that one by one the poor rich boys called F4 were creating their own happiness?

 - "I think InHei is ready for bed." Jihoo announced.

 - "Appa, Ajussi, not sleepy."

 - "Umma will be upset if our InHei doesn't get to sleep."

 - "Umma will get angry at Appa; dtal (daughter) doesn't want that, deh?"

 - "Anieyo, Appa," Jihoo and JunPyo left with InHei to her room after hugs and kisses from her Aunts and Uncles.

 - "Is it my imagination or does Jihoo seem different this month?" WooBin said.

 - "Deh, he does." JanDi agreed. "Na can't quite put my finger on it hajiman isn't he smiling more?"

 - "He's taking part in the conversation more."

 - "Now that I think of it, he's not as withdrawn as he usually is." JaeKyung came off as a carefree spirit but had a good judge of character.

 - "Maybe, there's a yeoja in his life," GaEul was a romantic at heart who believed everyone had a soulmate.

 - "Jihoo? The namja practically lives at the hospital, when would he meet anyone?" YiJeong didn't agree with his wife.

 - "YiJeong-ah, that's it!" JanDi shouted. "Jihoo called me by his admin's name this afternoon."

 - "Chincha?" WooBin clapped his hands excitedly. "I'll get some info on her."

 - "Andwae!" All three girls yelled.

 - "Wae?"

 - "If Jihoo finds out, he won't talk to us for months," JanDi said.

 - "She's got a point, Bro. You know he went to New York to get away from..." YiJeong stopped mid-sentence.

 - "Gwenchana YiJeong-ah," JanDi looked down, avoiding everyone’s sympathetic gazes.

 - "Mianhae, JanDi-ah." What he had stopped himself from saying was that Jihoo had gone to New York to escape seeing JanDi married. Despite that Gu JunPyo was his best friend, he also loved JanDi. To the point that he did everything possible for her and JunPyo's relationship to prosper, even if he had to deny himself.

Meanwhile, in InHei's room, Appa and Ajussi read her a story and then Ajussi took out a guitar and sang for her. Being a good little girl, she was asleep before the song was done.

 - "Komapta, Jihoo knows how she looks forward to your visits each month." Gu JunPyo clapped his friend on the shoulder.

Jihoo smiled affectionately on the sleeping child.  "She's daeback, you finally got something right," he poked fun at his often blundering friend.

 - "Yah! I resemble (should be resent) that remark."

Jihoo laughed at his incorrect word use.  "Deh, Gu JunPyo."

 - "How's life in New York?" They had left InHei's room and were hanging out in her play room.

 - "Chuah. You? No problem balancing chaebol and family?"

 - "Ani, Na won't make the same mistakes my parents made."

 - "Mullon aniji (of course not), we've all learned from our experiences."

 - "Deh, our kids aren't going to grow up like we did. What about you? Are you going to be Ajussi the rest of your life?"

 - "Until the right person comes along, Na would not be unhappy giving all my attention to your kids."

 - "What if the right person is already in your life and you’re too busy giving all your attention to our kids to realize it?"

Jihoo looked at his friend in surprise. Every now and then his friend said something that wasn't ridiculous, wrong or self-absorbed and made perfect sense.  "Mol-lah," was Jihoo's answer. He really didn't know. Was the right woman already in his life? He sighed and looked at his watch. "Na better get going. Harabeoji and I are going fishing in the morning and Monday I have to tour the other two clinics."

 - "JanDi says you're thinking of opening a fourth clinic."

 - "Deh, I have to make sure I get our numbers into the board so we can vote come January."

 - "I need to take my leave from the others."

Jihoo and JunPyo went downstairs to find the rest of the gang.

 - "Mianhae, I’ll be leaving first. Harabeoji and I are getting an early start tomorrow."

 - "Sunbae, we only see you once a month and only for a few hours," JanDi complained.

 - "WooBin and I will be in New York often preparing for the wedding. You won't escape." JaeKyung meant every word of her threat.  If Jihoo didn’t come to them, she and WooBin would come to him.

 - "Like I could, WooBin will send his men after me."

 - "That's right, Bro," WooBin agreed.

 - "Jalja Jihoo-ah," GaEul said.

 - "Jalja GaEul-ya, take care of my nephew. Jalja everyone." He bowed and let himself out, looking forward to spending the next day with Grandfather but not to getting up early.

New York, NY

Ilana was bored; she had already gone to see the kids at the hospital and was now back home. Her knee was much better and she could walk on it briefly without the use of crutches. She took the bus to and from the hospital, even though Dr. Jihoo had instructed her to call Dr. Jaejoong or nurse Hani for help while he was away.

Ilana had had Dr. Jihoo's company morning and evening for a week, before his monthly leave and had gotten used to his quiet but odd personality. They could sit perfectly at ease in each other's presence and not say a word. He wasn't like her Oppa's who wouldn't let her be until she told them what they wanted to know. Although, his quiet and unassuming manner was almost as dangerous as KyuJong's passive and gentle personality. She'd already caught herself saying too much at times.

Since she had nothing else to do she turned the TV on to catch up on Barefoot Friends, having forgotten all about the last two week's episodes. Ilana had just settled herself comfortably on the couch when her phone rang.

KyuJong hadn't had the time to sit and review Ilana's blood work. He and Suzy had been so busy after having returned from their trip to New York, Ilana's test results had gotten buried on his desk. Things were finally settling down and he decided to take advantage by getting into the office early to tidy up. He spied the white envelope and immediately remembered he only glanced at the results before getting sidetracked somewhere else. He sent up a quick prayer for guidance; no matter what the results. Staring at the paper, he was going to have to make a call he'd rather not. He did not know what Ilana's condition was to start with or when she was diagnosed, all he had to go by was this blood test. Not only were there abnormalities in her complete blood count indicating the possibility of anemia, her reticulocyte count was extremely high. Her bone marrow was producing red blood cells at an extremely high rate because her body is destroying them before their appropriate time. The girl needed a blood transfusion soon, if not immediately. More than just her anemia worried him; how would this news affect her carefully controlled depression? He sighed; he couldn't put this call off any longer. One more prayer for the right words and he dialed her number.

November 18, 2013

Monday morning dawned gloomily and raining just like Ilana felt. KyuJong’s call left her immediately exhausted.  She tried to sleep, but couldn't. By the time she was able to sleep, there were only two hours left before her alarm went off. She took a cab to work, her knee was better but it still pained her at times.  She had been diligently working on her Physical therapy and knew that her knee was healing.  KyuJong told her she needed to do the PT as if it were a grade 2 sprain and not just a 1 in order to heel faster.

The day went by with her in a daze. She needed to make a phone call and was putting it off. Thankfully, she was busy bringing Dr. Jihoo's patient files up to date and didn't have time to think.  Ilana walked back from the cafeteria with Abigaíl. Her stomach was completely in knots and scarcely ate half of her lunch. What she really wanted was to sleep, but chose Abigaíl's company instead. Abigaíl invited Ilana to spend Thanksgiving at her family's home, for which Ilana was deeply touched. Uee and Shi-Yoon volunteered to work that day, letting Abigaíl and Ilana take the day off.

Ilana noticed Dr. Jaejoong doing rounds and thought to ask him if he was taking new patients.  First, she had to get away from Abigaíl.  They walked back to their desks and put their lunch bags away.  "I'm going to run to the bathroom, I'll be right back. I want to blow my nose." She did seem to be catching a cold, just to add to her worries.

 - "You're catching another cold?"

 - "Yes, unfortunately."

She walked back down the hall just in time. Dr. Jaejoong had just stepped out from a patient's room. She hurried her pace before he walked away.

 - "Dr. Jaejoong!"

 - "Ilana-ssi, if there's anything else that needs my attention, pretend I'm not here." By the end of Dr. Jihoo's leave each month, he was grateful he was only second in charge.

 - "Actually, I just had a question about your practice."

 - "Chuah," he smiled in relief. "Ask away."

 - "I have a friend," she lied, "who needs to start seeing an immunologist. Are you accepting new patients?"

 - "Mianhae, I'm only seeing hospital patients. My family will be back soon, I'll be cutting my office hours until the New Year. She can see call the office and schedule with Dr. Amy or have HyoJoo, at the office, schedule her for after the first."

 -"Oh, o-okay, I'll have her do that; thank you for the information." Ilana sighed in relief. She had a few options and would need to carefully consider her next move. KyuJong wanted her seen right away but what if there weren't any appointments available soon. She'd been healthy enough, for now. The vitamins KyuJong prescribed help and she’d only had a mild cold, so far. She didn't really have to think about it just yet, right? Her phone call, with KyuJong, replayed in her head.

- "Yeobosayo Oppa!" Ilana had answered her phone.

- "Ilana-yah," the way he said her name instantly made her heart race. "Mianhae, I was just able to review your lab results."

- "Gwenchana, Oppa," she tried to sound natural, like she wasn’t ready to have a panic attack.

- "Mianhae," he decided to just come out and say it. "Ilana-ya already knows her CBC is abnormal but your reticulocyte count also very high." He heard her breathing but other than that she had remained silent. He continued. “It's my professional opinion you be seen by a specialist and get a blood transfusion soon, if not immediately. Do you have any questions for me?"

- "A-anieyo."

- "Ilana-ya will follow through with this, deh?"

- “D-Deh, O-oppa.”

- "Does Ilana want me to tell the others? Suzy will know when she puts the results into your file."

- "A-anieyo, Oppa; not unless it's absolutely necessary. I'll leave th-that up to your d-discretion."

- "Arraso, call me as soon as you get an appointment."

- "Deh, Oppa. I'll let you go now; I think I'll watch a little TV and go to sleep early."

- "Arraso, get your rest, call me or Suzy anytime you want to talk. I know she wouldn't mind me saying that."

Ilana had gone immediately to bed, and laid there for hours without sleep.

I can't wait to hear your comments. Silent readers drop me a line every now and then. Kansamnida!