January 14, 2013

HyunJoong had told his friends he’d be going back to his suite to sleep, after dining with them at the Captain’s table. Needing to unwind from the last few days, he was looking forward to uninterrupted sleep. All he really needed was a bed, and even that was optional, but the Captain generously treated him to one of the largest suites available. A mattress on the floor would also suit him just fine. The problem at the moment was, tired as he may be, he couldn’t sleep. He kept replaying the 2K13 and the Peru fan meet performance in his head. He always did his best, but being a slight perfectionist, he always worried that maybe he could’ve done better. Was the dance routine executed as they had practiced, did they need more practice to make it right. Was the song line up good, should they change the order next time? Did he connect enough with his fans? All these scenarios and more played in his head and didn’t let him fall asleep. “Aish, I’ll just go for a walk,”  Kim Hyun Joong thought to himself.

He decided to walk along the promenade deck, figuring that once he completed the lap, his mind would have quieted itself.  Perhaps, then, he could sleep. At this late hour and on the water, he was still comfortable in his black shorts and black short-sleeved shirt.  Enjoying the warm air, as it was only 15 degrees back home, in Seoul, he would take advantage of the warmth while he could. Staring out at the water and letting his mind wander, he soon heard voices. It seemed like someone else had his same idea of clearing their head with a walk.

When he could no longer hear the voices, he decided to start walking again, maybe they had left. He kept walking for a little while longer, but soon came upon the sight of a guy and a girl; they must be the owners of the voices he had heard.

“What is your wish, Ilana-ssi?”

- “Omo! They are on a date. Eottoke? I don’t want them to hear me,” HyungJoong said to himself. Afraid to be discovered, he didn't move for a few minutes, until he realized the guy was his friend, KyuJong. Although he didn’t wear the ‘prankster’ title amongst his friends, it didn’t mean that he didn’t enjoy a good prank sometimes. He couldn’t resist and decided to interrupt his friend. Friends come before girlfriends, is his motto. “Yah! Kyu-Jong you’re giving away wishes now?” He regretted interrupting them immediately after, for they looked so startled. Especially the girl who looked like she would faint at any moment.  "Mianhaeyo, if I was interrupting something?” He looked at his friend with a meaningful stare saying ‘Is this your girl?  Are you on a date?’.

Kyu Jong caught his meaning and coughed nervously.  Aniyo paboya! We’re just hanging out looking at the stars.” Ilana looked past the two guys, staring hard at the ocean. She thought for sure her face was bright red. She too understood Hyun Joong’s meaning. “I thought you were tired? Why aren’t you in your suite resting?”  KyuJong spoke in English, not to be rude to Ilana.

- “Na can't,” he laughed, “neaga too wound up. KyuJong-ah knows how I get after a performance? Na can’t stop thinking about it; wondering what na could’ve done better.”

- “Sunbae works hard and always give his all, wae do you worry so much? The fangirls always love you no matter what.”

- “That's exactly wae na work so hard; they are the reason for nae success. Na owe it to them. Na, never want to disappoint.” Ilana felt she could respect this Kim HyunJoong; she had seen puffed up idols before and knew this man was not one of those. He came across professional and yet down to earth with a passion for his work. He almost reminded her of her brother.

- “Sunbae does work hard, but you don’t have to work right now. Wae doesn’t Sunbae hang out with us?  We were just walking around.” Kyu-Jong knew Ilana was giving him a death glare, even though she was looking out at the water and not him. He wasn’t about to let her off the hook so easily.

- “I see that you gentleman know each other very well, I will take my leave so that you may catch up with each other,” Ilana spoke to the two of them while looking at Kyu Jong.

- “Anieyo gwenchanayo, Ilana-ssi doesn’t have to leave!  Neaga the one that intruded on your time,” Kim HyunJoong ever the courteous one. Kyu-Jong hooked his arm through Ilana’s to make sure she didn’t run away, which earned him a questioning look from his friend.

- “See? HyunJoong  Sunbae doesn’t want Ilana-ssi to leave.  You’ll make him feel bad."

HyunJoong gave his best sad face to Ilana. He’d find out what his friend was up to later. "Ilana-ssi should stay, juseyo. Na do not see this guy often, but we talk all the time. It’s not every day na can just hang out like a normal guy with normal people.” Ilana could hear sincerity in his voice, but really, this situation made her uncomfortable. She could feel her heart rate increasing and couldn’t afford to have a panic attack right now. Taking a deep breath to steady her nerves, the guys took it as her assent.

- “That settles it, HyunJoong doesn’t want Ilana-ssi to leave and neither do I.” He smiled at her trying to make her relax.

- “Let’s go to the ‘Crow’s Nest’”, Hyun Joong helped his friend out, by not giving the girl a chance to change her mind.

- “Araso, kaja.” Kyu-Jong and Hyun Joong began walking in the direction of the elevators. “I bet Mal is working tonight. He’ll make sure you unwind.” Ilana stopped walking, which also made Kyu Jong stop as he had his arm still entwined with hers.

- “What is the Crows Nest & who or what is Mal?” She whispered to Kyu Jong and then resumed walking. She did not want HyunJoong to hear her panicking.

- “It’s just a lounge on the Sports Deck, but it’s got a great view and Mal means horse.  Ilana-ssi will just have to meet him.” He could see she was not re-assured. “Don’t worry, consider him an Oppa too, and quit your Ajumma voice, you're with your Oppa’s, not strangers.” Ilana wondered what Ajumma meant, but resigned herself to continue walking.

- “Dog?! Who let you on board?"

- “Mal!" Dog (HyungJoong) and Horse, tangled themselves in strangling hugs, back pounding, fist bumping, and laughing. Ilana stepped out of the way to avoid getting caught up in this male ritualistic greeting of sorts.

- “Mantis, where’s Otter & Turtle?” You guys haven’t come up in a few weeks, where’ve you been hiding?” Park Jun Min, aka Horse, asked Kyu Jong, aka Mantis.” Speaking of hiding, Ilana was confused and a little nervous; she was trying her best to remain inconspicuous behind Kyu Jong.

- “The other two are probably in Otter’s room gaming. Wae don’t you call them up?”

- “Who is this?” Jung Min finally noticed Ilana hiding behind Kyu Jong. “I’m Park Jung Min, it’s an extreme pleasure to meet you. I'm also known as ‘y Charisma.' Where have you been hiding, beautiful?"  He gave her a formal 90-degree bow. Ilana tried to stay calm, but he was really making her nervous. Her rational side said he’s just being weird, while the panicking side said he’s creepy, run for it.

- “Yah! Stop flirting with nae dongsaeng!”

- “Ah, KyuJong has taken the girl under his wing, that’s what the relationship is,” Hyun Joong thought to himself. “That guy always takes care of everyone.”

- “Jung Min-ah this is Ilana-ssi, she’s our new friend.”

- “You’re a guest? Wau! I thought you were a new crew member. Nice to meet you Ilana-ssi. Kyu Jong’s making sure you are enjoying your stay, right? If not, you come tell me, araso?” Like the other guys, JungMin couldn't believe a young person was on this cruise.

- “It’s-it's a pleasure to meet you as well,” Ilana managed to speak, even though she was shaking from nerves.

- “I’ll call the other guys and get us all some soju, araso?”

- “Call Suzy too, that way Ilana-ssi doesn’t get bored around a bunch of guys.” Kyu Jong heard Ilana exhale, he knew she was nervous, that’s why he suggested they call Suzy.

- “Everyone is on their way.” JungMin came back a few minutes later, with a tray and four bottles. “One bottle each to start, ok?” Jung Min began to pass out the bottles to the excitement of the other guys. Unfortunately, he sat one in front of Ilana as well.

- “I don’t drink” Ilana spoke quietly. The guys didn’t hear her over the raucous of opening their drinks, pouring, and sighs of contentment. Ilana cleared and spoke a little louder. “I don’t drink!”. The guys stopped and stared at her. They had heard of such oddities before, but it was a surprise to have one face to face.  "I’m-I'm sorry to disappoint you.” The guys stared at her as if she was an alien. She would’ve have run back to her room, but that would be even more embarrassing.

- “Just have one shot with us, Ilana-ssi.” Jung Min did his best aegyo for Ilana, in hopes of changing her mind. She just shook her head no, too uncomfortable to speak. “That’s ok, I’ll order you a cappuccino.”

- “She shouldn’t have caffeine this late, it will make her jittery and she won’t be able to sleep properly.” Before Ilana could accept or decline KyuJong beat her to it. She just stared at him in confusion, not really knowing whether she should be upset or not. The other guys started laughing at her; they were used to Kyu Jong always watching over and taking care of them.

- “Ilana-ssi?” HyunJoong spoke. “Did you know we call KyuJong ‘Center’? He is always supportive and taking care of us and also never takes sides. He takes care of me, even when I’m not here. Deh?” Hyun Joong quickly deflected the attention off Ilana and helped her not get irritated at his friend.

- “Somebody’s got to keep after you.” Kyu Jong just laughed.

- “Here you go, a pineapple smoothie for the lady, complete with little umbrella.” JungMin had returned with a special non-alcoholic beverage for Ilana.

- “Thank you, it looks really good.” Soon after, the rest of their group arrived and the raucous began all over again.

- “Ilana-ssi where they using their animal names again?” Suzy asked her. "Don’t worry, they’re not as weird as they look, they’re actually very nice.” Ilana just smiled at them, they were weird, but they were also very nice.

Sometime after the second round, HyunJoong began to tell them all about his current schedule.  "This is great guys, gomawo for hanging out like this. It’s been so hectic this last month, sometimes na wish to be someone else. Not Kim HyunJoong.  Neaga grateful for nae life, hajima sometimes it gets to be too much. You know, we were in Indonesia and the people there work so hard just to have the little they do, but they were also happy. Na thought with everything na have, sometimes na think I’m not happy.”

Ilana could very easily relate to what this young man was saying. Didn’t she always wish to be someone else? Or better yet, not be here at all?  "I tried to be someone else for a while, it didn’t work for me. I hope it works for you some time.” Everyone was astonished that she spoke. Up until that moment, she had sat quietly just being a spectator to camaraderie in the group of friends. Even if she was just an outsider, she could sit back and watch and almost feel like a part of it.

- “One of these days Na will, Ilana-ssi. Just for a day, Na won’t be Hyun Joong and I’ll let you know how it goes. JungMin-ah let’s get another round.”

- “These guys are going to finish the entire stock of soju before they’re done for the night,” Suzy commented to Ilana. “I’m tired and I still have to go to work tomorrow, unlike everyone else at this table.”

- “We’ll be working really hard helping Sunbae get ready for the concert,” HyungJun answered.

Suzy just gave them a raised eyebrow, saying:  ‘yeah, right?’  “If Ilana-ssi is up for making an escape, I’ll walk with you to your room.”

Ilana couldn’t wait to make her escape. She couldn’t believe she blurted out she had tried being someone else.

January 15, 2013

Ilana woke up late the next day; since she and Suzy had left the crows nest past 2 AM. Looking back, she had enjoyed her evening. Listening to their conversation was very entertaining; it went from goofy nonsense to serious and then back again. Stretching, she unhurriedly got out of bed; she would have the entire day to herself. The guys would be busy helping Hyun Joong prepare for his concert.

“Stay out of trouble tomorrow Ilana-ssi, we’ll be helping Sunbae. Don’t be late. The concert starts at 6:30. Tell the crew member on duty you are on the VIP list.” Kyu Jong had told her.

 - “These guys sure like to give each other titles,” she smiled at the thought. ‘Sunbae’, Suzy had explained, means leader or Senior and since Hyun Joong would be directing them, they could call him that. She was tempted not to go to the concert, but when the star of the show personally invites you, there is no backing out.

“Ilana-ssi, I look forward to seeing you there,” HyunJoong had told her before she left with Suzy.

Ilana sat out on the verandah for a little while, being lazy and enjoying the sea breeze. “I better figure out what I’m going to wear tonight,” she thought. Remembering she’d just stuffed suitcases full, without thought, when she was leaving home, she really didn’t know what clothing she had brought.  Housekeeping had unpacked and organized everything when she had arrived. After searching for what seemed like forever, she decided on a black linen sheath with black ballerina flats.  It was dressy, but casual as well. Not wanting to disappoint the guys by showing up in her usual attire, this would be the first time since her arrival she took the time to carefully select her outfit. She was always cold and especially being on the water; jeans and long sleeve T’s had been her usual attire these past weeks. Her hair, she decided was due for a cut; she had only been throwing it in a ponytail or half up secured in a clip. It was still early enough, she hoped to get an appointment at the salon, in time for the concert.

The salon had been busy, but Ilana returned to her room in time to eat a little, do her makeup and get dressed. The dress, she noticed was a little looser than she remembered, but it would just have to do. As for accessories, she thankfully remembered to grab her Mother’s freshwater pearls.  They were the only accessory she had with and the only jewelry she ever wore.  She knew she was going to be cold, but had nothing suitable to wear with the dress. She thought she’d seen scarves in one of the shop windows downstairs, perhaps she could pick one up on the way.

After purchasing a lightweight cranberry colored pashmina to go with her dress, Ilana arrived at the Queens Lounge about thirty minutes before the show was to start. The scarf should suit its purpose and keep the chill off her arms. The lounge would warm up once more people arrived.  The crew member escorted her to the front row, reserved for the Captain and his guests.

 - “There must be a mistake?”

 - “No Miss, this seat was reserved for you.  Enjoy the show, Miss,” the crew member smiled politely and left.

As guests started to arrive, so did the Captain. He bowed to her and introduced himself politely as Captain Kim, he was also Korean.

The show was about to start and the theater was filled to capacity; greatly surprising Ilana. The house lights were dimmed and the curtain was raised; on stage were a stool, a microphone, and a guitar. Hyun Joong walked out on stage dressed to impress in a black suit, shirt ed to show off his chest. He flashed his winning smile and waved to everyone and sat down to pick up the guitar. He began to play and soon his voice accompanied the guitar. Between the acoustic guitar and his sweet voice, she quickly became lost to everything around her, including being cold. There was a screen in the background with the English translation of the song, but she didn’t need to see it. With eyes, she could feel every emotion he was trying to convey, just by hearing his voice. She opened her eyes and now his eyes were closed with every emotion playing out on his face; it was like he was recalling a sweet but painful memory.

- “I’m Kim Hyun Joong,” he stood and bowed to everyone when he was done. “Thank you for coming, tonight, I’m glad to meet you all. Please be nice to me, I hope you enjoy the show my friends and I have prepared for you, tonight.” Ilana, as well as everyone else, applauded eagerly. 

The stage was cleared for the next song. This was a dark song, no longer a sweet memory; anger showed on his face and was evident by the short and stilted movements of his dancing.  He was also a very good dancer. Suddenly two more male dancers appeared, faces obscured by sunglasses and the light smoke screen on stage. When everyone’s attention was on Hyun Joong and the other two, two more men appeared and they all began to sing and dance together. The music’s tempo changed and the lights brightened just a little and everyone’s faces could be seen. Ilana gasped and covered in surprised astonishment. It was her Oppa’s and Jung Min! Excited murmurs and applause erupted as everyone recognized their favorite crew members. Their voices were beautiful and the dancing flawless, as if they did this on a daily basis.

When the song was over they each introduced themselves as Shy Prince (Young-Saeng), Forever Center (KyuJong), y Charisma (JungMin) and Baby (HyungJun), and HyunJoong as Leader.  Also dressed in black and looking just as handsome as their leader, they bowed for the audience. Ilana couldn’t get over the happy surprise. About midway through the concert, they performed a few cover songs and a few solos and duets much to the audience’s delight. Young Saeng walked out to the edge of the stage for a solo; to Ilana’s shock, he stopped right in front of her. The song was called ‘Maria’ and when the chorus began he sat down on the stage right in front of her. She wanted to see the words, but couldn’t tear her eyes from Young Saeng. The song was so sad, she could see it in his face and could feel it in her heart. Tears began to well up in her eyes and had to close them. The more she looked at his face the more she wanted to cry. He gave her his sweet caring smile as soon as the song ended and she reopened her eyes. Ilana’s heart was still pounding from the effect the music had on her.

Thankfully, the mood began to lighten up after ‘Maria.’ They continued with songs of sweet love and confessions. Hyun Joong finished with an endearing song called ‘Thank You’, about being together with your love until the end. When he was done, he called the rest of the guys out say thank you, and goodbye. They even sang a song called ‘Bye Bye’. They danced off the stage, through the aisles, and out the theater doors into the lobby, shaking hands as they went. They left the audience on their feet and clapping. Kyu Jong was right, the people loved Hyun Joong, they also loved their crew members.

Hi, all! I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Below please find the link to the concert's playlist. Please forgive me if your favorites are not on the list. I viewed over 100 videos to select the songs that would best suit the story. I hope you enjoy.