“Don’t ever do something that you’ll regret.”

-Haraboji-

23 | Protection

Lee EunJae’s Note to Lee SaeHyun

Appa, I’m sorry. I can’t do what you asked me to. I love him and this is hurting me too much. Please forgive me.

EunJae

***********************

Ever since I was young, no matter how angry I was, the thought of killing someone had never crossed my mind.

Not even once.

Okay, so maybe there was once when I nearly had nasty thoughts of strangling my classmate SiYeon to death because she kept on laughing at the way that I ran the 200 metres—she even went as far as to say that I looked like a badly deformed gorilla because apparently I made these weird expressions like I was in an excruciating pain, but that’s another story—but I did not touch her. Instead, I had my own way of payback. I called her mother, pretending to be our homeroom teacher Mrs. Park and said that she was a lesbian who kept on courting the girls in the class that it had brought unnecessary dispute among the students and that was the last that I had heard of her. Her mother had sent her to live with her aunt whom I heard was a witch doctor to purify her soul.

Anyway, the point is, even though I had hated her so much, the thought of killing her had never crossed my mind. However, in this case of blabbermouth JiWoon, I figured that I had had enough.

He should definitely be killed with his head being on display at a museum, labelled ‘Nation’s Biggest Loser’ written in bold red letters.

I mean, how dare he intend to go on national television to tell the public about the truth? Who is he, anyways? It was not like he was a family of ours. He was a mere outsider who happened to know about the real deal. Who gave him the right to talk about us?

This Kang JiWoon, if I get my hands on him, I swear to God that I would kill him with my own bare hands. How did he end up becoming such a sore loser?!

Aish, I need to talk to him before it’s too late.

I excused myself from Haraboji who was eyeing me suspiciously but luckily he did not inquire any further about Haneul’s phone call or else, I would have to make up another lie to him. As far as I was concerned, I did not want to lie to him anymore. My conscience had been slowly eating me alive.

I dialled JiWoon’s number and waited impatiently for him to pick up.

“Hello.”

The sound of his voice on the phone brought back some nostalgia.

Back when we were thirteen, Haneul and I would spend our weekend nights calling for JiWoon and JaeHoon just to hear their voices. I still remember how foolish I was back then, when each time JiWoon had picked up my call, I would hang up the phone and squeal in delight, breaking into girlish excited giggles each time—just like how a lovesick teenage girl would. It was kinda ironic to be thinking that calling him now does not really make me feel giddy inside—that I still wanted to kill him over the phone.

“YAH KANG JIWOON!! WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!!” I yelled.

I figured that I needed to let it off my chest.

There was a pause. JiWoon seemed to be taken aback by my sudden outburst. If not for the sound of his breathing, I would have thought that he had hung up.

“Err...SooJin?” he asked at last, sounding unsure.

How could he not know that it was me calling? How could he have forgotten the sound of my voice?!

“YAH, WHERE ARE YOU?!” I yelled like a madwoman into the phone. I just could not hold back the anger any longer.

I could hear him taking a deep breath, like trying to calm himself; like he was determined not to let me deter his decision. “If you’re calling to ask me to change my mind about the interview, don’t bother. There’s nothing you say that will make me change my mind. I’m going to tell the world about the sick lie that he has put you through. It needs to end soon,” he said, sounding firm over what he was saying.

Seriously, why was he making it sound like he was the noble one trying to right all the wrongs in the world? Why did he make it sound like I needed his help, like I was this damsel in distress calling out for his help to rescue me from the y beast (ie. Kwon MinWoo). I thought he had agreed to let it all go—to let me go.

I thought he wanted me to be happy.

“Where are you, JiWoon?” I asked again, more calmly this time. Barking at him would only be a waste to my precious voice.

“I’m in Seoul,” he replied cautiously, “If you think you can try to find me, think again. I won’t make it easy for you. I’m telling you, SooJin, that I’m doing all this for you. You’ll thank me later.”

Thank him later?!!!

If I was not so desperate to find out about his whereabouts, I would have hung up and prayed to God that he’ll be eaten alive by nasty rats. However, I needed to meet him. I needed to persuade him to change his mind. If not, all that I had done to the Kwon family would end up in vain.

At this rate, I did not even want to think about what would happen should Haraboji and Aunt Mina found out about the truth.

“I need to see you, JiWoon,” I could not hide the desperate tone of my voice. It was the truth—I was really desperate to meet—or kill—him

“Are you okay?” JiWoon sounded as though he had softened up, “Did he make you do something bad because of me?”

I did not want to say anything to that because I knew that if I say anything, he would find out that I was only doing this for the Kwons’ sake.

“JiWoon, let’s meet at Cafe Retro 99 later. Perhaps around 6pm? I really want to see you,” I said, “Please be there, JiWoon. If you don’t know the place, just ask around. I’ll be waiting for you there.”

JiWoon sounded as though he was thinking about it before he finally said in a much calmer voice, “Okay, I’ll meet you there.”

I hung up and fought hard the urge to throw my fist in the air. Just wait till he meets me, I’ll give him a punch or two, that loser!

However, I was still happy that at least I had the chance to stop JiWoon from making that stupid decision of airing our lies on national television. Maybe I could tie him to a chair and leave him to die in a deserted old factory.

I guess I was still smiling when suddenly Haraboji quipped, “You seem happy,” he was looking at me with his eyebrows raised, “Meeting anyone special?”

I quickly shook my head and resumed back to my seat opposite of Haraboji. “No one in particular, Haraboji. Come, let’s eat! This is a fun day for both of us.”

Haraboji just looked at me funny, with an expression indicating that he wanted to ask something but later changed his mind. Instead, he continued eating as I did the same.

I was not really in the mood for talking, anyways—my mind was already preoccupied with the thought of strangling JiWoon alive.

****************************

I could have sworn that Haraboji could smell something was going on. He was looking at me in this weird way as though he was telepathically saying “I know but I’m only pretending that I don’t know that you’re meeting JiWoon so that you’ll tell me about it yourself” and it was really freaking me out. I could feel my heart beating so fast under his steely gaze.

Don’t look at him, SooJin. You’ll blurt everything out once you see his eyes.

DON’T LOOK!

I kept on reminding myself to avoid his gaze but my knees were already wobbly. It was the same feeling that I would get whenever being called to the headmaster’s office for all those naughty things that I had done in the past. Truth be told, Haraboji had kind of reminded me of my headmaster on multiple occasions.

Haraboji cleared his throat and that broke my stance. I had forgotten that I was supposed to NOT look at him but I did and when I saw those intense eyes, cold sweat had begun to roll down my forehead.

“Ever since you made that call, you’re acting all strange, SooJin,” Haraboji said in his deep voice, “Are you all right? Who was that?”

“Me? Acting strange?” I let out a nervous chuckle, “No way, Haraboji. Hey, look! It’s a cow! I’ve never seen a cow before.”

Haraboji just stared at me funny as I pretended to be amaze by the boring sight of a cow lazing around by the roadside. There was nothing spectacular about it; I basically grew up in a place where a crazy boy was dating cows. Nothing could ever beat that kind of ‘amazingness’ that my village possessed. However, in this moment of need, I needed to dodge the question, hence my newfound compassion for the lazy cow.

“You’ve never seen a cow before?” sarcasm was oozing through his voice, “I thought your village has thousands of them?”

I winced.

Darn it, why did I sound so stupid?!

I’ve never seen cows before? Only a stupid guy would believe that kind of lie.

“Don’t be silly, Haraboji,” I let out another nervous chuckle, “It’s not like I’m living in a barn!”

Haraboji still looked at me funny but lucky for me, he decided to drop the subject by moving on to a lighter topic—his grandson.

“Why did you fall for MinWoo, SooJin?” Haraboji asked all of a sudden.

His question startled me and for a moment, I had forgotten that he was waiting for my answer. I was lost in my own web of thoughts.

Why did I fall for MinWoo?

To be honest, I did not really know how to answer to that. I did not even know if I had an answer to that question. Thinking back, to say that my love story with MinWoo was complicated would be a major understatement. I did not even know why or how I fell for him. For me, there never was a solid reason to fall for anyone. It was the same case with JiWoon and it was happening again with MinWoo. I guess I was always the ‘blindly in love’ type, not the ‘love for a reason’ type.

Kwon MinWoo, except from him being out of this world gorgeous and extremely rich and the y faces he makes while he’s asleep and the cute way that he laughs and the childish way he plays pranks on me, there was nothing utterly spectacular about him.

Okay, I’m lying. You caught me.

Like hello? What more reason do you need? Him being attractive and rich were already huge points. However, I would be lying if I say that those were the only reasons why I fell for MinWoo.

I guess I just fell for him for being him. There was never a valid reason why. I would go insane if I try to crack my brain to find the reason. However, how do I tell Haraboji? Everyone always seems to have a reason why they fall for their spouse. Haraboji would not be happily accepting my corny words of liking him just the way he is. You know, like in the movies where the lead roles just all of a sudden fell for each other and you would be there wondering, “Why do these two fall in love?”

“I don’t know,” I said finally, admitting the half-truth, “I just did.”

Contrary to my belief, Haraboji seemed contented with my answer as a small smile began to creep up on his stern face. “You want to know the story of me and my wife?”

“You and Halmoni?” I asked.

It was weird. Halmoni’s name had never once been brought up in the house that I had completely forgotten of the fact that there was a Halmoni in the house.

He nodded. “The reason why I never brought up her name is because I was afraid that I’ll miss her even more if I think about her.” He had this look of longing in his eyes that was telling me that he was talking from his heart—that he still misses her deeply.

“Oh, Haraboji,” I said, softly patting his hand that was holding the walking cane, “That sounds so sweet like words from a really romantic novel.”

I was confused when Haraboji suddenly started to laugh.

“What’s so funny, Haraboji?” I asked, still confused. I did not say anything funny, did I?

Haraboji shook his head, his laughter dying down as he looked at me. “I’m sorry,” he said with a smile, “but sometimes, you can be funny without even realising it, SooJin.”

“But I wasn’t even making a joke!” I protested, “Why is it that whenever I joke, you and MinWoo would never laugh but when I’m being serious, you guys would crack up? You two are just the same!”

Haraboji let out a soft chuckle. “I’m sorry, SooJin,” he said, “To make it up, I’ll tell you the story of me and my wife, okay?”

I nodded. I figured that if I still acted miffed, I would not be hearing the story between Haraboji and Halmoni. From the sound of it, I thought that I might be in awe with their love story.

“Our story was nothing spectacular,” Haraboji began as though reading my thought, “so don’t put your hopes up too high, SooJin. We were a product of an arranged marriage.”

“Arranged marriage?” I said, my voice in a near whisper. I completely had forgotten the fact that Haraboji was about a thousand years old—he was from ancient times. During his time, people might still be in awe with electricity. No wonder he was a product of an arranged marriage.

Haraboji nodded. “At first, I hated it. I was young and ambitious. Getting married would mean slowing me down. Besides, I didn’t even know her.”

“Aish, Haraboji, how can you say that? How can you