Chapter 19: Stay Close Don’t Go

{ Jen’s POV }

He soaked all wet, his body was burning out and I tried my best to get his body inside the apartment. God damn it, he was too heavy for me to handle alone. But no one was here, there was only me so I had no other choice but to get him to my back and bring him in the apartment. I laid him on the bed, he was burning. The temperature of his body was so high.

“Idiot. Why don’t you just get in to the apartment,” I murmured.

“I want to see you.”

I sighed, “Stop being idiot.” I took more blankets from the drawers and wrapped him with it. He blinked his eyes, looked at me confusedly, “Where have you been?”

“Somewhere you don’t need to know,” I put more pillows on his head, so I still could rub his back, trying to make him feel better. This was my mother’s method, she rubbed my back every time I fell sick, and it made me feel better somehow.

“I was crazily looking for you, everywhere,” he said with lower voice.

I shrugged, “Well, it wasn’t everywhere because you didn’t go to the place I went to.” I put the blanket tighter to his body and he was still shivering like madly.

I stood up, but he stopped me, “Where are you going?”

“Kitchen.”

I put my eyes on his hand which was holding my hand tight. He released it as soon as I furrowed my eyebrows, “I’m not going to leave you dying like this. Do you think I’m that heartless?”

“You kissed Ken. You left me—dumped me. Those were pretty heartless,” he explained, he was barely breathing but kept talking with that condition. His eyes became smaller as he was trying to capture myself more.

I didn’t give him any respond. I put some ice blocks on the bowl with water, and I took a small towel. I walked in to the room, he closed his eyes and he looked so pale. I put the wet towel on his forehead, to lower his fever because I didn’t know any other way but the traditional one—which I believed this would work. He suddenly opened his eyes, looking at me.

“Have you eaten your meal?” I asked, softly.

He shook his head. Of course, I cursed my stupidity for asking such.

“Porridge will be okay, I guess?”

He sneezed twice, coughing and somehow it sounded so painful to me. I bit my lower lip, “With spring onions.” I added.

He turned his head, and with those weak eyes, he said, “Stay close, don’t go. I’m not hungry.”

“But you need to eat something.”

“Stay,” he murmured.

“Moron.” I took the towel from his forehead, soaked it again with cold water and put it back. “Just try to sleep.”

I his hair gently. I believed it would help him to sleep. It was what he wanted me to do every night he couldn’t sleep—he closed his eyes, in minutes, he already went to his dream land.  I saw his peaceful face like this and it was the best thing I could ask for. Being idol wasn’t as easy as what we saw in the TV screen. It wasn’t all about singing, dancing, going to variety shows, having interviews, having photo shot or recording only. I knew it must be so hard for him.

To be honest, I was happy enough when Taekwoon got recognized by lot of people because of his sport achievements. He was so good in soccer, boxing, swimming and also taekwondo. It was all about Jung Taekwoon that I knew. Jung Taekwoon I loved. But after he saw a singer stage performance, somehow his dream to be world-wide soccer player changed into a good singer. I was dilemma, but I had nothing to do but to support him—no matter what. His dreams equal to my dreams too.

//

“What do you think of me being singer?” asked Taekwoon, in one fine day at café while he was eating his lunch with his girlfriend.

“Eh?” the girl stopped chewing her kimbab.

“I want to be a singer,”

“What this time?” Jen lifted one of her eyebrow.

“I want to be a singer,” he repeated it again.

Jen shrugged, “Being singer isn’t as easy as what you thought, Taekwoon. I don’t want you to be slump or you gave your dream up—about being world-wide soccer player that easily.”

“I want to be a singer,” he repeated it once again, Jen looked at Taekwoon’s eyes, “I’m crazy enough to see you in every tournament and cheering you up is like dying, you know. I have to compete with the other girls who screaming over you and they stared at me like I was a cavity. That’s .”

“You know I only have my eyes on you, remember?” said Taekwoon, ensure Jen. “I won’t do such things that will make you jealous.”

Jen smiled, she found he was very determinate this time, “Okay. But promise me one thing.”

“What?”

“Don’t let fame change you.”

//

“I really don’t get it why you play so hard to understand, Leo. Smile more won’t hurt you,” Hakyeon said—one day, after the very first fan meeting. Leo shrugged, “I don’t want to do something I don’t want to do.”

“But smiling is one of basic service for our fans,” added Hakyeon again. The other seemed agree, they were having their dinner and had a little chit chat about the fan meeting.

Leo gulped his water, “It they love me, they should accept me for being who am I.”

“Leo, please,” Hakyeon this time forgot his pride to beg to the younger. Leo stared at the leader, “I don’t want to be a fake person. This is who I am. Also, I need to keep my promise.”

“What promise?” asked Hongbin, curious.

Leo ignored that question. There was no reason for him to tell everybody that he didn’t want to make his girl jealous. Somehow, smile was one of his greatest weapons why his girlfriend fell for him and sure he didn’t want her to get jealous if other girls found his smile was charming and awesome because she was someone who supposed to be the only one who did.

“Okay, I understand.” Said Hakyeon.

//

“Tell me why are you so quiet?” asked Jen. It was their umpteenth meeting after that free ticket movie from Junhee. They walked side by side in the soccer field that afternoon, ten minutes past from 5 o’clock.

Leo lifted one of his eyebrows, “Why bother to ask?”

“Nope. Just want to know.”

“I don’t feel like to. Listening is more interesting than speaking. You can explore someone’s personality from the way they’re talking, the words they used, the expressions on their faces, the tone of their voices, everything,” Leo explained.

Jen smiled, “You talked more just now.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay. That’s unique. You are.”

“Me? Unique? No.”

“Yes, you are. I wonder why Junhee somehow has no a crush on you,” Jen mumbled to herself. Leo gasped, “Junhee? Moon Junhee?”

Jen nodded, “She’s your taekwondo colleague, right? She was the one who introduced me to you. Remember the free tickets for our very first meeting? They were from her.”

“Uhm… is it okay to say it to you...”

“What? Is it about Junhee? She’s my best friend. Best of the best! I couldn’t imagine my life without her,” Jen smiled widely.

“I see.”

“So tell me what is about?” asked Jen, Leo rolled his eyes, doubted about the words he wanted to say. Jen blinked, “Just say it. Junhee and I have no secret.”

“Really? So I guess it’s okay to say that Junhee confessed her feelings to me, months ago. I’m sure she already told you that, right?”

“What? Really? She didn’t tell me anything about that! Wow! So what happened next?” Jen seemed so happy about the topic, but Leo was the opposite. This was a topic he didn’t want to brag about—not in front of her.

Leo shrugged, “Just yeah, like that.”

“You rejected her, I suppose. But why? She got everything all the boys ever wanted. Pretty face, angelic heart, superior brain, and she is very charming,” that girl kept talking, she didn’t realized any facial changed from the latter.

Leo sighed, “I said..”

“You said…?”

“I have a crush on another girl.”

“I see. But I’m sure you are going to regret it, for rejected Junhee,” Jen said, she laughed, “I mean, that’s your opportunity to date such a perfect girl but you lost it.”

“No. I didn’t.”

“Really? That girl must be very pretty and so beautifully awesome, right?” Jen stepped in the bench and walked on it, she got Leo’s hand to hold her so she wouldn’t fall down even if she lost her balance.

Leo chuckled, “She’s not that pretty. She’s annoying and loves to talk. Noisy like a bee and sometimes she’s so childish.”

“That’s far from perfect. Stupid, you shouldn’t reject Junhee,” Jen protested after she heard the description of the girl in Leo’s heart. Leo laughed, “Who said she has to be perfect? She only needs to be herself when I’m around her.”

“But I never see you walk with other girl. You always with me on lunch break, you also walked me home every day. Is she your childhood friend or your neighbor? And… hey, don’t say that girl is only lived in your imagination!” Jen hit Leo’s left arm slightly.

Leo smiled.

Jen stared at him, blinked her eyes for the third time like she just discovered something important, “Taekwoon…”

“What?”

“Say it.”

“No. I won’t.”

“If you don’t say it, how do I know?”

“Know what?”

“Jung Taekwoon! I swear I don’t want to see you again if you don’t say it today!” Jen said it loudly; she jumped and lifted her hands in her chest. Leo chuckled, “What do you want me to say?”

“Stupid.”

“I don’t get it,” Leo murmured. “I don’t know what are you talking about?”

“Stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid Jung Taekwoon you are so stupid,” bubbled Jen. She rolled her eyes and put her tongue out, “Don’t ever think that I love you too, okay? Because I don’t!”

“You don’t?”

“Moron! I don’t want to have a boyfriend like you!”

“Okay, that’s also the reason why I didn’t say it.”

“Say what!? Don’t be such a complicated!” Jen started to get frustrated.

“Say that I love you?”

“You do?”

“Yes.”

“Really?”

“I really do. But you don’t right? You always saying that no one would love me, someone nerd, someone quiet like a statue, someone who only know how to listen, and you also don’t want to have a boyfriend like me, so what’s the point if I say those words out of loud? You still don’t like me,” said Leo—he smiled, patted her head gently.

“You rejected Junhee because you had a crush on me? Me? Are you kidding me? Me is nothing to compare it with Junhee, you know? Are you blind or what?” Jen still couldn’t believe it.

Leo chuckled, wrapped Jen’s body in his embrace, “Who said you’re nothing? You are everything to me.”

“Wow you are so cheesy.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay, I like it, though.”

“Good.”

“By the way, Taekwoon, actually it’s not like that I don’t want to have a boyfriend like you but..” Leo cut off her words, “I know. You don’t need to say it. I can see it right through your eyes. You love me too. I know. Don’t worry.”

“Oh my God.”

“I love you, Jen.”

“You talk so much today, I love it.”

“You love me,”

“Okay. Whatever, and can you stop hugging me, it’s hard for me to breathe,” asked Jen. Leo laughed, “You’re so small, I always want to hug you like this, so let me do it today.”

“Stupid, you can kill me! After saying that I’m not that pretty and noisy like a bee, now you are trying to kill me, huh?”

Leo laughed.

Today’s sky was so bright. As bright as his smile—smile that he thought he wouldn’t give it to someone—to a girl who stole his heart away. To a girl who kept calling him stupid-moron-idiot-and other similar words.

//

{ Leo’s POV }

My head felt like spinning. I tried to open my eyes but everything went hard to do. My vision was getting better when I heard footsteps. I swore to myself why did I become weak like this. I used to be an athlete, strong but now I fainted because of rain. Non-sense.

“Woke up already?” asked her.

I rubbed my eyes—I wanted to see her—while nodding.

“I bring you the porridge,” she said, put a tray on the table next to our bed. There were a bowl of porridge just like what she said, a glass of milk, and some pills.

I lifted one of my eyebrows, “Your hair is wet.”

“Oh, yeah, I just went out to find spring onions. Minimarket near the florist ran out the stock so I went to other place,” she replied. “It’s okay though, just drizzle outside. Don’t worry.”

“You better change your clothes first, we both know that I don’t want you to get sick,” I murmured. She smiled, “The porridge would turn cold if I changed my clothes. Plus, I won’t get sick.”

“If you don’t change your clothes right now, I won’t take the medicines.”

She rolled her eyes, “Nice words, Jung Taekwoon,” and she went up, opened her closet—took some and walking to the bathroom.

I got up, leaned to the pillows on my back. She went all the way to buy the spring onions. Something I couldn’t live without it on my food, she knew it although she hated it.

“Don’t just stare. Eat them,” a voice awakens me from my own thought. I turned my head, and seeing her made me glued.

She was wearing my soccer team jersey. The red one with my name on the back, with shorts and she dried her hair—tied them into a messy bun. She looked so prettily beautiful even though my jersey was oversized for her. She rolled her eyes, “You should learn how to not stare. It’s rude.” She walked toward me with a thermometer on her hand.

“Put this on your armpit. We need to know your temperature. If your fever didn’t go lower, I’ll call Hakyeon to bring you to the hospital,” she added.

I shook my head, after I put that thing on my armpit, “I don’t want to go to hospital.”

“Stupid, are you happy being sick person?” she nagged, checking my forehead with her palm hand.

“Yes. Because this is the only way you will take care of me. Call me selfish or whatsoever but being with you like this is such a blessing. I don’t mind if I have a serious illness, as long as I can be with—”

PLAK!

“How dare you saying such, huh! Don’t you think it will make me worry so much? How could you forget about VIXX and they’re suffering because you’re not with them and you just wished like you are okay with a serious illness? Put your mind together before speaking, Jung Taekwoon,” she cut my words and turned her back—she was going to leave the bedroom.

I pulled her in, stopped her.

“I’m sorry.” 

She let another sigh out, “Sorry for that reddish cheek I gave you.”

“It’s fine, that was for love. Come, sit here,” I asked her, pulled her next to me. She blinked and I put the tray. I gave her the bowl, “Would you?”

She chuckled, “You are 23 years old, Taekwoon. You can eat by yourself.”

“But I’m sick, remember?” I pouted. She hit my forehead with her index finger, “Idiot.” She scooped a small portion of porridge on the spoon, asked me to open my mouth but then I protested, “That’s too small. I’m not a kid. Give me more scoops.”

“Then eat it by yourself.”

“Je~~~~n,” I pledged, clinging on her.

She groaned, “Dear VIXX’s fans, look at your chic handsome vocalist that well-known as a poker face and talk the least in the group, please consider your favorite member once again, and make sure that you know that Jung Leo is someone like this…”

I laughed and replied her, “They love me because I’m so quiet, do you know that? That’s cool.”

“Cool? Gotta be kidding me, Hongbin is cooler!” she said. I stopped chewing my food, “You think so?”

She watered her lips, “Everyone has their own charms, right? I mean, Hakyeon looks handsome when he is dancing, so does Ravi. Hongbin and Hyuk look the greatest when they’re smiling. Ken hit the coolest state when he is singing.”

“How about me?” I asked.

She bit her upper lip, “Do you need some water?” she changed the topic, avoiding my gaze.

I took a deep breathe, “Yes please, I need to take the medicines.”

She nodded, and left the bedroom.

//

{ Jen’s POV }

 “Should I call Hakyeon so you can see the doctor?” I asked.

He shook his head, “I’m getting better. Just need more sleep, maybe?”

“Oh, okay. I’ll call him to come tomorrow. You can sleep now,” I added. He nodded, “Good night.”

“Night, Taekwoon.”

He shrugged, pulling the blankets over his chest and closed his eyes. Of course he couldn’t abandon VIXX for me, that wasn’t my will too. Dreams were supposed to be dreams—they needed to be reached. He opened his eyes all of sudden. I was staring at him, and had no reason to turn my face to other direction because he just caught me up. He blinked, “What are you doing? Go sleep.”

I nodded, got up.

“Where are you going?” asked him.

“Sleep?”

“Isn’t this bed yours too?”

“Ah yes, but…”

“Go sleep.”

I lay down, blinked to the ceiling. How could I sleep soundly if there was a war in my mind? I couldn’t stop those voices inside my head, which were flashing each other and it confused me. “Close your eyes, Jen,” a voice shocked me.

I looked at him. He closed his eyes, but I could sense that he hasn’t sleep yet. I let another sigh out, grinned, “Said someone who supposed to sleep earlier.”

“When did you remember me?” he asked, softly.

I bit my upper lip. He opened one of his eyes, “It’s only Jen who knows that I love spring onions. Only Jen who knows she looks beautiful when she is wearing my jersey because I always say so. If you know all of them—because I’m sure it wasn’t a coincidence, then I suppose you remembered all.”

//

“I love you.”

“Love you too.”

“I love you.”

“I hear you, don’t repeat it.”

“I love you.”

“Do you want some punches, Taekwoon?”

“I love you.”

“This ugly duckling, are you mad or want to die?”

“I love you.”

“Seriously if you don’t stop it, I will kiss you!”

“I love you!”

And she pressed her lips into him, to shut him up. It was their first kiss.

//

{ Leo’s POV }

“We need to talk, Jen.”

Finally I spoke those words. I didn’t care how painful the headache I had, I wanted to talk to her. She remained quiet, squeezing both of her hands under the blanket. “How long do you plan to keep pretending like you didn’t remember me?” I asked her, softly.

She let another sigh out, “I don’t know but I guess it would be better for both of us.”

“Then you should ask for a discussion if it’s about us,” I sent her a slight gaze, she shrugged, “Like I have a choice?”

“You should tell me about the hate you received because of me.”

“That’s not because of you. There is no way I have to tell you those important things.”

“Because you’re my girlfriend, they hate you.”

“No, Taekwoon. It’s because I couldn’t be a girlfriend they expected you to have. I wasn’t good enough for you, I will never be, is what they think about me. I didn’t want to whine over it, we are not kid anymore, right? We know what is hard to do and what is impossible to do,” she said. Her soft voice sounded painful.

“Just because dating an idol is a hard thing, doesn’t mean it’s impossible for us. You know the reason why am I being that quiet in the group,” I replied.

She smiled a bit, “Thank you for made me your reason.”

“I want to keep my promises to you, Jen,” we were talking and looked to each other, until Jen turned her face and avoided my eyes.

“You don’t need to keep them, Taekwoon. We already broke up yesterday,” she grasped. I shook my head, “No. We haven’t. We would never break up.”

“B-but…”

“Those hurtful words you said yesterday, just to remind me about the terrible fight we had on prom night, right? You wanted me to know that you already remembered me because the words were exactly the same,” I explained.

She stumbled, “Taekwoon you..”

the fact this story got so much love burst me into tears, i swear :""D

i got so many leo feels ;;A;; and i hope chapter 20 can be the last chapter of A Kiss To Remember!

hwaiting!

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