SNSD stood behind Taeyeons bedroom door, it was for a moment but to them it seemed like an enternity. Some members quickly regretted coming to the house, it was too soon. . 

Sunny had her hand on the door knob, she couldn't bring herself to turn the knob.

"Sunny? You alright?" Jessica asked as she was nervous as well. Sunny looked back at her members, "I think we should do this right now. . " 

 Hyoyeon came and placed her hand on top of Sunnys and smiled and opened the door slowly, more traces were left behind from medics and investigators, the room was purple. .  Taeyeons favorite color.

The bed was cleaned, no sheets and pushed off to the side, the investigators cleared the room before they allowed anyone to enter. They kept walking forward as they stopped near her nightstand, they noticed the photos; photos of her family, of SNSD, and the SM family.

" She must of felt lonely ..." Tiffany said as she picked up the frame and traced Taeyeons smile;  in the photo she was smiling, she was with her parents, it was her dads birthday. Tiffany kept looking at the photo, "  she looks so happy .." she thought to herself. Tiffany placed the frame down. 

Sunny walked over to the opposite side of the room, "Hey girls this is Taeyeons desk" . Sunny sat down on the chair and opened the drawers, "Taeyeons will said it was in her desk right? A purple folder" Sunny was rummaging through the drawer and then stopped, she found it, Sunny looked up at the girls . The girls held their breath as they saw Sunny pull out the purple folder. Seohyun started crying. "Sunny ah~ I think its better we move to the living room" Hyoyeon looked at Sunny as she motioned towards the younger members. "Okay' Sunny said as she gripped the folder.  

SNSD all gathered in the living room again, opening the purple folder. It was Taeyeons small and neat handwriting. In the first page, on the bottom corner she wrote:

Taeyeon was afraid of her members being affected by her, so she decided not to tell them about anything. She was diagnosed with depression during late August 2012, and was required to take therapy sessions; though she only went twice a month, due to her busy schedule. Taeyeon suffered alone from the side affects, being nauseated, restless, frequent headaches, insomnia and fatigue. She wanted to quit taking the medication, but manager oppa and SM wanted her to continue taking her medication until the Dr. allowed her to.

Inside she wrote how angry she was, being constantly sick, she was angry at herself mentioning she felt she was dragging SNSD down, yet she it up and smiled as she went to their activities or during their practices. Only feeling comforted when she was with her members... She would mention how lonely she was when her activities were over, coming home to an empty home. She would scribble on some pages:  Missing the sweet SNSD dorm days.  Taeyeon began writing in the folder as her therapist wanted her to write all the things that were bothering her, or she wished she could express more. So she began writing "letters" to each members and others, expressing herself, or writing about things that bothered her yet she never mentioned. 

Finally the girls reached the pages, where Taeyeon wrote the letters. They laughed and cried reading them all. Taeyeons silly frustrations, her cute scribbles and doodles on the bottom corner of the pages. They cried as they read how Taeyeon expressed how she was angry at them or felt hurt by them by some of their arguments or misunderstandings. In each letter Taeyeon would express her love or anger, her frustration or how proud she was of them.  They laughed as they read some of her funny "confessions" and cried as they realized that they hurt and failed to notice her pain.

The girls finished reading the letters she wrote to them. Again they couldn't stop the tears. They talked about how they needed to trust each other more and needed to show each other more love as they now realized in a blink of an eye it could be too late. SNSD gathered their stuff as they started turning off the lights and walking out the door. It was the last time, they entered her home....

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( these are just some few "letters")

The Letters 

To Yoona 1~

Hey Yoona I'm sorry about putting so much pressure on you ... about being the Visual. Yes, i joked about it here and there, but today I over heard you talking about it to Yuri, telling her that you felt I was pressuring too much. Why can't I say I'm sorry? I don't know T-T sorry Yoona I know you're one of the youngest members here I should be taking better care of you So I'm really sorry that you feel like that, I'm sorry that as a leader I'm not doing my job right.... Yoona I'm sorry :( 

Yoona 2~

I'll be honest I didn't watch your drama until recently I just finished watching it today... I am so shocked :O seriously, I knew you had to do some kissing scenes, but I still can't get over it. Aigooo ~ >.< my poor Yoona ! I know its your job as an actress but I wish I could just keep you in a box, away from those situations. kekekeke ^^ My beautiful Yoona, you did a good job, I can really see you being a great actress in a future.. even after SNSD... Yoona Fighting ^O^

To Hyoyeon1~

 I was so happy when we all found out that you and Eunhyuk oppa were dating, you two are a power couple.. I was really happy seeing you with him.. You two are friends that I love and care about dearly , and I hope he realizes that you're a one and only Hyoyeon and asks you to spend the rest of your life with him. kekekek ^^.  ...But it really hurts me that you started being careful around me with him. Why? Is it because of  what happened between me and Leeteuk? Its hurts that you two would try to be careful around me. . You think I don't notice? You two would hold hands and kiss in front of us without a care, but after that happened ... as soon as I would walk in the room, you two would stay away from each other. I'm not that stupid you know.. I wish you two would stop. Its been way over a year since the incident. It hurts me, because I know its my fault. Now when I see you both I feel bad, so I don't know if you have noticed, Ive been trying to avoid you two now when I get the chance.... well anyways Hyoyeon you Choding :P I hope Eunhyuk cherishes you!

To Hyoyeon 2 ~

Today was horrible, I know me and you are close friends,and we tend to clash at times, but today I really felt hurt. I felt like you crossed the line. Why did you yell at me like that? I know I haven't been doing so well.. It really hurt me when you yelled at me, in front of everyone, I know you were tired we were all tired, but it was a huge hit to me, to hear you say that I was an unfit leader, I wanted to scream at you too as I left the practice room I really wanted to run back in and yell at you but its just that my stupid medication makes me act differently .... Hyoyeon...  You really hurt me today .. But I'm sorry as well as I can't tell you why ..

To Sooyoung 1 ~

You really have a great appetite kekekeke ^^. I still look at you in amazement, Today when we where eating with the staff I couldn't stop thinking, where does all the food fit? Im really jeaouls. I wish I could eat all those delicious foods with out a worry of gaining some weight T-T Also Why are you so tall? heheh .. I have been asking myself this for YEARS :P 

To Sooyoung 2~

I'm sorry to hear that your father fell ill. As you were crying tell us that his condition wasn't as good as you first mentioned I felt horrible, I should've asked about him more. it wasn't because I didn't care but because I didn't think it was so serious I'm sorry T-T. I really envy your relationship with your parents, I love my parents but sadly I don't visit them as much as I should. You are a faithful daughter, going to see your parents any chance you get. I'm sorry I feel as the leader I should've requested our manager oppa to let you off more often. Honestly I don't how to help, but recently I talked to my lawyer about selling one of my properties or somehow set up something for you... I don't want you to worry about paying.. I really want you to just focus and enjoy your father.. Sooyoung fighting ^^ my love and prayers go out to you and your family !! 

To Tiffany 1~

Yah! you Siwon are so a couple right? You two somehow seem how weird. It's like a love - hate relationship really... On and off again. Seriously I think we're all getting tired of it .. I'm really tired of the drama -____- . You two look like a Hollywood couple kekeke :P

To Tiffany 2~

I'm sorry today I crossed the line with you again. Wish you didn't find me puking in the bathroom... The stupid medication, it gets me really nauseated. I really hate taking it. I know you were trying to be helpful by telling the girls to call manager oppa. But it's not because I'm sick... I was afraid you would all find out so i yelled at you ... I'm sorry for yelling out  mind your own business. I just don't want anyone to worry about me, we have a busy schedule and I don't want to get in the way sorry >.< 

To Sunny 1~

Sunny Bunny ! GAWAHAH I have a surprise for all of you >O< but you girls didn't come -___- I couldn't sleep so I was cleaning out one of the rooms I use as storage, and I had lots pictures ... which gave me an idea. I didn't sleep that night because I was putting up the pictures in my living room ^^ .. I was sort of embarrassed later as I started thinking you guys might think I was being weird putting up all of your pictures up. Any way :P I put up your Catch Me If You Can poster up. YAh you were so beautiful. !!!! Shorties Unite ^.< .. muwahahha .. Hey about Sungmin, I know you don't like it when anyone bring him up. But you two dated for a while, then you two broke up, because you felt like you guys wanted to focus on your careers. But honestly I think you're stupid,we can all feel the small tension between you two. I did something you probably wouldn't want me to .. I'll confess since you probably never get to read this any ways.. I talked to Sungmin ... we started talking .. &  I couldn't help it and I asked him if he still has feelings for you. He said yes,  the feelings for you were never gone. . he made me swear I wouldn't tell you .. So I won't .. But I'll make sure you both get back together because you deserve to be happy. So stop worrying about me , love and be loved. kekekke ^^

To Sunny 2~

I guess I've been caught... I felt like my heart stopped when I saw you pull out my medication from my luggage. I'll admit it was sort of funny, I can't believe you'd think I was hiding drugs.. I told you everything today.. Are you disappointed? I'll be honest I felt like a  weight was lifted off my shoulders.. I really don't like lying to you and the girls, but I was happy to hear you say that you'll keep this from the other members. I hope you'll continue being by my side as right now I feel lost. I promise I'll get better and I know I promised I'll tell the other members about this all when we finish our Japan tour.. Thank you Sunny ^^ shorties fighting ^o^ 

To Sunny 3~ 

im tired Sunny, I just want to sleep or go on a vacation with just us, no managers no cameras.. Sunny ah~ I really hate this medication . I want to stop taking it . Aigoo I must be going crazy kekeke ^^ . Sometimes I hate coming home I feel like someone is watching me o.O . My mother asks me why do I live in such a big house by myself... Honestly I want this to be for my future family. I can't really imagine when it'll happen, but I hope when day I can open my door and being welcomed by my kids. .. I want to be loved by my husband ... I awalys wonder who'll be the "lucky" ones who get to joing the SNSD family. Kekeke ^^ they'll have 8 sisters-in-law ... !!!! They better be able to handle us. SUJU I have a feeling this might as well turn out to be a SUPER GENERATION . Kekeke ^o^  ~   

To Seohyun 1~

Seohyun my mankae ! Aigoooo ^^ why are you so cute!! Hehe I wish I could keep you in my pocket. Hehehehhe ...  Unfortunately for me, you're so tall T-T... I don't think I ever met such a well young and mature person like you at all. Seriously I feel that at times, you are more mature than I am. I'm proud of your acomplishments, and I'm so grateful for your hard work, taking care of all your unnies. There have been many times where I feel like without you, I wouldn't have been able to go on during the day. When I look at you, its a constant reminder for me, that I have to do better. I hope that I'll be able to return and repay you for what you have done not only for me but for SNSD. I hope that you and I someday will be able to have a duet with you.  One of my wished is that I'd be able to sing along with you on stage as you show off your angelic piano skills.  I really hope that you continue on studying the piano, you certainly do have a talent for it. 

To Seohyun 2~

You mankae you are beautiful .. intelligent and well educated .. but you need some help dealing with boys .. Aigoooo ^^ never knew this day would come.. I thought you learned a little something while filming WE GOT MARRIED with Younghwa. But I guess not so much. I love that you posses an innocent mind and have a pure heart when it comes to love but I really feel that you need to start exploring outside of your little bubble. Im not saying start dating and get married. I just wish you can, with a group of friends, would have group dates or just hang out. You need to learn that sometimes you need to see the world through the eyes of someone else. ... I don't know if you have noticed but someone  certainly thinks of you more than just a friend... I can't believe that SUJUs evil mankae has his eyes set on my angel mankae. heheh I really wonder how this is going to turn out. I wish I could just tell you, but I won't only time will tell, you really need to start noticing ... I hope you find love one day. . whom ever it may be. . . they better pass my approval, & SNSD approval, its not going to be so easy. 

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Hope you all enjoyed reading these chapters. Thanks for reading. I know they weren't so great. I'll work harder >o<

also I didn't write everyone's "letter" i really didn't know what to write lol . thanks for reading again... ^^