Tiffany's POV

It had been just over three weeks since I joined the band and I had loved every single minute I have spent working on the music, either with the whole band or alone with Sooyoung. What I hadn't loved was the rest of my ed up life. My mother wouldn't stop going on about how I had thrown my life and my talent away and Siwon wouldn't stop agreeing with her. Which, while it wasn't exactly surprising, really pissed me off.

The only thing that was keeping me sane was the music. I could lose myself in it so completely that the in my life couldn't touch me. When I was making music I was one hundred per cent free. Free from the expectations everyone (and by everyone I mean my mother and Siwon) had of me.

On top of all that I was becoming increasingly confused about Sooyoung and how I felt about the brunette. There was no denying that I was deeply attracted to her, and not just for how ing beautiful she is, but also for how funny, compassionate, talented, sweet and wonderful she is. I couldn't stop thinking about her. When I woke up she was the first thing on my mind, when I went to bed she was the last thing I thought about before succumbing to sleep and throughout the night she was what I dreamt about.

Choi Sooyoung was consuming my waking and sleeping thoughts and I had no idea what to do about it. I couldn't just give into what I felt and be with her. I couldn't. I could see it in her eyes that she was feeling the same things I was. Ever since my confession about Jessica I would catch her looking at me like I was a complex puzzle she was trying to solve. I guess in a way I was.

My life was this mess of mixed up puzzle pieces that just couldn't fit together, no matter how hard I tried to force them to. It was overwhelming. While I was with Sooyoung I could let go and be myself in a way I haven't been able to in a very long time, since before my world crumbled and it all went to .

I hear you wondering what the I'm talking about and if your mind is thinking that the thing with Jessica ed me up, well it did, but that's not what I'm referring to. The catalyst for the total destruction of my life happened just before the summer between my third and fourth year at SACA. I have never spoken to anyone about what happened…and I am not going to start now.

I jumped up from my sofa when I heard a soft knock on my front door. I padded over and swung it open to find my Dad, Sung Ki Hwang, at my door. His big hazel eyes, which I inherited, were twinkling as he pulled me into a warm hug. Nobody hugged better than my Dad.

"Hey Honey, how's things?" He asked as he followed me into the kitchen. I flicked on the kettle and pulled out some cups.

"Oh yeah same old Dad. You?" I asked as I got our tea ready.

"You know me Tiffany, working too much and just muddling along. But how about you give me an honest answer Tiff, how are you?" my Dad can read me like no one else, I have never been able to lie to him.

I sighed and took a seat on a stool at my bench. My Dad took a seat beside me and gave my hand a squeeze, "I know you're not happy Tiff, every time I see you it breaks my heart because I can see how broken you are. Why do you let her do this to you?"

There was only one 'her' he could be referring to, my mother. I shook my head and looked down at my hands, "Its complicated Dad."

He sighed in frustration, we'd had this argument before. "Tiffany this is ridiculous! You are a grown woman and can live your life the way you want, the way that makes you happy."

I forced a smile onto my lips and muttered, "I am happy Dad."

"Bull, you are not happy Tiffany and you haven't been in a damn long time!" My Dad never swore and almost never raised his voice so his outburst made me jump a bit. "Your mother shouldn't have this much power over you Tiffany."

I couldn't look him in the eye. I know he has a vague idea about what happened between me and Mom but he doesn't fully know and I sure as hell wasn't telling him. My parent's relationship had deteriorated after everything that went down and now they were barely civil to each other. I couldn't help but blame myself for that.

I smiled half-heartedly at my Dad and said, "Dad I am happy. I quit the orchestra and joined the band with Jonghyun which is great. I am finding my passion for music again and that makes me happy."

My Dad shook his head sadly and said, "Why are you still with Siwon, Tiff?"

I fell silent and blinked back the tears that his words had instantly brought to my eyes. I had no idea how to answer that one without bringing up the past and divulging more details then I ever want my father to know about that time of my life.

"Dad, Siwon's a good guy. He's smart and dependable and I'm sure a million girls would kill to have a guy like him". I rattled off, not even convincing myself.

"Tiffany, I'm sorry to be blunt, but you're gay so what the hell are you doing with a guy, and not just any guy, he is arrogant and possessive and cares more about appearances than anything else. Why are you doing this baby?" Dad squeezed my hand tightly in his and locked his hazel eyes on mine.

"Dad," I began and then I burst into tears. It all got too much and I broke down. My Dad pulled me into his arms and rocked me gently as I cried. "Dad it's all so messed up! I'm stuck and I don't know what to do," I sobbed against his chest.

"Tiffany, you're not stuck! If you're not happy, break up with Siwon, why won't you just be who you are? No one that matters will think any less of you," My Dad said sadly as he kissed my forehead.

"I can't be who I am because who I am is unacceptable!" I yelled pulling out of his arms, "You have no idea what happened back then, what I went through. I can't be who I am because it just messes everything up! I can't give in to what I feel because I'm scared ok! You happy now Dad?!" I screamed as hot tears fell down my cheeks.

My Dad stared at me, his eyes widened with shock. "Tiffany, honey I know you're scared but eventually you have to let yourself be happy. Fear is not something to live your life by. The only thing to fear is fear itself."

I shook my head and tried in vain to fight back the tears in my eyes, "I'm doing the best I can ok? I'm doing the best I can."

"No you're not Tiffany. You're lying to yourself, you're short changing yourself in the worst kind of way. I love you and all I want is for you to be happy again." My Dad pleaded with me.

I was about to respond when there was a knocking on my door. I swiped at the tears on my cheeks and tried to compose myself as best I could. I walked over to the door, kind of grateful for the distraction from the conversation I was having with my Dad.

I swung open the door to find Sooyoung standing outside my door with her guitar. I had completely forgotten she was coming around to work on songs with me.

Sooyoung's POV

I walked up the stairs to Tiffany's front door and went to knock when I heard the sound of raised voices. I heard Tiffany scream "I can't be who I am because who I am is unacceptable! You have no idea what happened back then, what I went through. I can't be who I am because it just messes everything up! I can't give in to what I feel because I'm scared ok! You happy now Dad?!"

What the hell is going on in there? I thought to myself as I stood on outside her door. I had a sinking feeling that Tiffany was talking to who I assumed was her father about her uality. I made my heart ache to hear the pain in her voice.

"Tiffany, honey I know you're scared but eventually you have to let yourself be happy. Fear is not something to live your life by. The only thing to fear is fear itself." I heard a man say. I agreed with him whole-heartedly and thought Tiffany should too seeing as she had it tattooed on her right hip.

"I'm doing the best I can ok? I'm doing the best I can." I heard Tiffany cry out in desperation.

"No you're not Tiffany. You're lying to yourself, you're short changing yourself in the worst kind of way. I love you and all I want is for you to be happy again." Her Dad said sadly. I closed my eyes and swallowed around the lump in my throat. I raised my hand and knocked on the door. I couldn't just stand out there anymore, it felt wrong.

After a few moments the door swung open to reveal Tiffany who had clearly been crying a lot. I assumed by the look on her face that she had forgotten we were getting together to work on the music today. I was about to speak when Tiffany forced a smile onto her face and welcomed me in.

"Hey Soo, sorry I lost track of time, come in and we'll get to work in a second," She said in a falsely, cheerful voice. I gave her a small smile and followed her into the apartment. A tall dark haired man walked over to us with a sad, but kind smile on his face. One look into his remarkably familiar hazel eyes and I knew without a doubt that he was her father.

"Dad this is Choi Sooyoung, she's in the band with me. Sooyoung this is my Dad, Sung Ki Hwang," Tiffany introduces us. I shook hands with her Dad and gave him a smile.

"It's nice to meet you Mr. Hwang."

"Call me Sung Ki, Sooyoung, and it's nice to meet you too. I should let you ladies get to work. Walk me out Tiffany?"

Tiffany nodded almost reluctantly and gave me a small smile, "Make yourself at home Sooyoung, I'll be right back." I smiled and nodded. Once they'd walked out I placed my guitar on the floor and took a seat on the sofa, sinking gratefully into the soft leather.

My mind was running in circles trying to make sense of what I had overheard. Since I had met Tiffany my brain hadn't stopped trying to process what I felt and what I could tell she was feeling but struggling with. It was kind of exhausting.

I just didn't understand why she was lying about herself. I hardly knew her but even I could see that wasn't happy with Siwon. When she was with us playing music or even just hanging out she was a completely different person. She was happy and free, but as soon as Siwon or her past (aside from her musical past) was brought up she changed. Her walls came up and she withdrew into herself.

I just wished I knew what had happened to her.

Tiffany's POV

After I introduced Sooyoung and Dad I walked him downstairs to his car. He was silent until we were standing next to his car. "Tiffany think about what I said. You can't live on fear. One day my girl, you are going to have to open your heart up again."

I stayed silent, I honestly had no idea what to say to him. My Dad sighed and opened the car door, "Sooyoung seems nice Tiff, maybe it’s time to open that heart of yours to the possibility of real love." With that my Dad got into his car and drove off, leaving me standing there in shock.

How the hell had my Dad picked up on my confused feelings for Sooyoung in the 90 seconds he had spent in her company? Sometimes I think my Dad is a mind reader.

Sighing to myself I trudged back up the stairs and let myself into my apartment. I looked over and found Sooyoung waiting on my sofa. "Hey," I murmured as I took a seat beside her.

"Hey, Hazel. You alright?" She asked softly.

For some reason I couldn't lie to her. I wanted to, but I just couldn't, "No, actually I'm not alright." I stared at my hands, too afraid to look into her beautiful eyes.

"You want to talk about it? You don't have to but I'm here if you need to talk," Sooyoung offered gently.

I took a deep breath and shook my head. I couldn't get into all that with her, I just couldn't. I couldn't bear for her to know the truth, to know how weak I was. "I'll be ok, um how about we get to work?"

Sooyoung nodded and gave me a sad smile as she got up to follow me down the hall to the music room. I could tell that it was killing her not to know what was going on. In a short time we had come to mean a lot to each other. I had a sickening feeling in my gut that she had over heard my fight with my Dad and I was just waiting for her to eventually bring it up.

In the music room I wandered kind of aimlessly around, brushing my fingers over the various instruments I had. I felt her eyes on me but couldn't force myself to turn around and face her, knowing she would be able to read the pain and confusion on my face.

"So what do you want to work on?" Sooyoung asked from behind me.

I swallowed around the lump in my throat and murmured, "Uh let's go back to the last song we worked on yesterday, I almost had it so I'd like to give it another go."

I walked over to my bass guitars and pulled out my beloved Fender. Sooyoung opened her guitar case and pulled out her guitar and plugged it into the amp. We played for a few hours, going over the songs. I was really proud of myself, I'd gotten the bands original songs down and even been able to have an input into some of them.

It felt right you know, playing in this band. It was the one part of my life where I felt totally happy and at peace.

After we'd finished rehearsing I walked Sooyoung towards my front door. She had been pretty quiet, like she was debating something in her head. I had a feeling it was about me.

"Tiffany, what happened to you?" she asked quietly.

I took a deep breath and stared down at my feet. How the was I supposed to answer that? It's not like it could tell her the truth, could I? "I don't know what you're talking about Sooyoung. Nothing happened to me."

"You have to know you're not fooling me right? I mean we haven't known each other very long but I can tell that something's going on. Please, Hazel just talk to me," Sooyoung pleaded.

I shook my head and snapped, "Look you're right we haven't known each other long so you don't know me. My life, my problems are none of your business." As soon as the words were out of my mouth I wanted to take them back.

Sooyoung took a step back as though she'd been slapped and nodded, "Fine Tiffany, you want to play it that way then we'll play it that way." Sooyoung grabbed her guitar and stormed out of the apartment, slamming the door hard behind her.

I sunk to the floor and put my head in my hands as I sobbed.

Sooyoung's POV

I raced out of Tiffany's apartment feeling more frustrated than I ever have before in my entire life. That woman was infuriating! No one had ever gotten under my skin the way that she did. It hit me as I ran out to my car, she got to me because I was falling in love with her. Of all the people to go and fall for, I had to fall for Tiffany Hwang.

She was the beautiful, intriguing, talented woman who had taken up residence in my heart and I couldn't stop thinking about her. On the flip side of that she was messing with my head, sending me all these mixed signals that had me questioning everything. I had this feeling that something really huge had happened to her, something bigger than her break up with that Jessica girl. Something that she just couldn't get passed.

I started my car and drove off. I had to get some answers and there was one person I felt just might have the information I so desperately needed. I sped all the way and parked my car haphazardly in front of Jonghyun's house.

I ran up his front path and banged on the door until he opened it. "Hey Soo! What brings you here?" Jonghyun asked with a smile, that faded as he took in my pained expression, "Soo what's going on?"

"Can we talk Jonghyun?" I asked tiredly.

"Of course, come on in," Jonghyun led me into his kitchen and got us each a beer from the fridge. I took a sip from the bottle and started fiddling with the label, not entirely sure where to begin.

"What's going on Sooyoung?" Jonghyun asked with concern.

"Tiffany." I said simply, still fiddling with the label on my beer bottle.

Jonghyun nodded, not looking surprised at all, "I wondered when you and I would end up having a conversation about the redhead bomb-shell herself. I can see how you guys feel about each other, it's pretty obvious."

"Well I know how I feel but I have no idea how she feels. It's all so ed up Jonghyun! She flirts with me and then she pulls away. Sometimes she looks at me with so much longing that it almost makes me breathless. Jonghyun-ah , I don't know what to do. She's is clearly so miserable with that ing toe rag of a boyfriend of hers, but yet she stays with him. It's all so messed up!"

Jonghyun looked sad, "Look Soo I can't tell you why Tiffany is the way she is, it's not my story to tell. What I can tell you is that she is the way she is for a reason. The girl you see while we're playing music, the happy, carefree girl, well that is the real Tiffany, the one I know and love. The cold, sad, broken girl you occasionally glimpse is who people have made her."

I groaned in frustration, "What am I supposed to do Jonghyun?"

He looked at me with the strangest expression, "Do you love her Sooyoung?"

I looked him square in the eye and answered simply and honestly, "Since the moment I met her."

Jonghyun nodded and gave me a smile, "I think she feels the same. I've known Tiffany a long time and I've never seen her look at someone the way she looks at you. I can't tell you what to do. I can't give you the answers. All I can say is please don't give up on her, she needs you even if she doesn't know it."

I nodded and gave him a tiny smile, "Jonghyun-ah, the thing that happened to her, it was bad wasn't it?"

Jonghyun looked sadder than I had ever seen him look, "Yeah it was bad."

I nodded again and got to my feet, "Thanks Jonghyun, I'd uh better go."

Jonghyun got to his feet and gave me a big hug before walking me out to my car. I got in and wound down the window. Jonghyun put a hand on my shoulder and said, "Please don't give up on her, Soo."

I looked up at him and said, "I won't, not ever." we said our goodbyes and I started to drive home. I got about half way when I spun the car around and sped off towards Tiffany's apartment.

I had to see her.

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Hmmm, well I hope you liked this chapter, any ideas about what might have happened to Tiffany? I mean being the writer and all I kinda know but I'd love to hear your thoughts! Pretty pwease? ;p

The next chapter will have the big reveal, so yeah, stay tune! xD

bye for now!

Love yaaa

p.s This is how Tiffany's father looks like in the story~ Lol, yeah, this is Ahn Sung Ki, one of korean senior actor. Why I used him? Well, he got a nice smile on that picture, don't you think? And he got this fatherly loving vibe on him, so yeah.. :p