As Seunghyun and his omma walked inside and removed their shoes, Seunghyun felt like lead. He could only imagine how his father would react. They had such high expectations for him. He was full of fear and worry. He had so many emotions that he felt like he was going insane. His mother took one look at his face and knew that there was something deeply wrong.

“Would you like to have that tea now, Seunghyun? I know I could use a strong cup.” She asked softly while wiping at her tears.

Seunghyun nodded. He knew that if there was one person who he could tell about this, it was his omma. She went into the kitchen to heat up the water. The house was silent, no one wandering around inside of its walls but him and his omma.

“I knew I should have kept you home today. Something in your expression and eyes… “ She said before sighing.

She poured their tea at the table. Seunghyun still couldn’t look up to meet his omma’s gaze. She had already had such a hard week. He was scared for her. He wanted things to be great, amazing, perfect, like Jiyong’s home but things could never be that way. He let his fingertip glide around the rim of his cup.

“I probably have to get a job now, right?” Seunghyun whispered heavily.

“Seunghyun. We will worry about that later. Now, please, tell me what is bothering you.” She pleaded with her son, resting her hand on top of his, giving it a gentle squeeze.

Seunghyun took deep breaths, trying to control his emotions from what he was going to tell her. It was so difficult. Should he tell her everything or just what was bothering him?

“Omma, how much would you like to know?”  Seunghyun asked anxiously.

“I will listen to what ever you want to tell me.” She answered supportively.

“Will you still love me?” He asked, his voice laced with worry.

“Seunghyun, I’ll always love you. Nothing will change that.” She answered.

“Will I be in trouble?” He inquired.

She laughed lightly. “I don’t know. You won’t tell me anything.” She said with a soft joking smile.

Seunghyun took a few more deep breaths, arching his neck to stare at the ceiling while he breathed, making sure the tears didn’t flow. He tried a couple times to start but the words didn’t come out. He took a few sips of his tea before his body started to cooperate and make the story flow from his lips.

He told her about Jiyong’s arrival into his class, how they started talking, where they worked, the day they ditched, the bearbrick, the day at Jiyong’s house, staying there, working with 1TYM, their kiss, their awkwardness afterwards, not being allowed in YG building, how Jiyong left the school. He told her about his raps, his smile, his style, his toys, how hard he worked, his whole personality. He told her that he didn’t know what to do because he couldn’t see himself without Jiyong. His tears started flowing halfway through his story and slowly progressed into full out sobs.

“Seunghyun? Why did you do that to the bathroom then?” She asked softly.

“B-b-because, the t-teacher s-said Jiyong left for another s-school. H-he never told me anything. H-he just left the day I left.” Seunghyun made out between sobs.

“Oh, my poor baby has his first broken heart.” She cooed.

“Omma! Y-you’re not helping!” Seunghyun grumbled.

“I’m sorry, Seunghyun. You’re just growing up so quickly. You should know though, we all have those. It makes us stronger. The more you are hurt, the more you can take.” She said with a comforting smile.

“R-really?” Seunghyun asked, wiping at his nose with his sleeve.

“Yes, really. Plus, Jiyong is still figuring things out. He is still younger than you and may not understand the things you do yet.” She reassured him.

“Well, he did say he would call me when he figured things out.” He said, remembering their talk the night before.

“There you go. You just need to be patient. You can also call him to hang out with you on Sundays. You don’t have to worry too much.” She said.

“I guess but he is going to be really busy. He is becoming a YG trainee.” He muttered.

“You just need to wait, my Seunghyun until the day you’ll no longer be mine but someone else’s.” She cooed, reaching to his hair.

Seunghyun’s eyes bulged. He shook his head violently. “Goejimal. I’ll always be yours, omma.” He said shocked.

She smiled softly. “You need to grow up sometime, my baby. I don’t want you to but at the same time I cannot wait to see where life leads you.” She said.

Seunghyun sat, speechless. He didn’t want to be without his omma. She was always there for him, no matter what. No one else was like that. He said that to his omma who laughed softly.

“You’ll find someone who will want to be with you rain or shine. I’m just that person to be there until you find that special someone.” She answered.

Seunghyun sat in a numb daze. He drank through every cup of tea his omma poured him while he sat there, trying to will his mind to think. He couldn’t think. He couldn’t feel. He tried but it was almost a lost cause until his omma got up from the table. She got up, brushed his hair back, laid a kiss at his hair line, and whispered “I love you” to him before walking out of the room.

Seunghyun felt a something small inside of him that felt like an itch. He always knew he loved his family but now he knew his love could stretch outwards. The itch began to grow. His lungs started to hyperventilate, his heart beat faster while trying to relieve the itch, his hands started fidgeting, until finally it reached his legs causing for him to stand. He grabbed his jacket. He went to his omma, giving her the biggest hug he has ever given her.

“I’m going out for a little while,” He told her.

She looked at him once and knew. She nodded. “Be home before midnight.” She cautioned.

Seunghyun ran out the door. There was one place he knew Jiyong would be. He had to see him. He had to let him know. He had to tell him. His fear was left behind him as he ran to the bus stop with reckless abandon.