CHAPTER 20 – FALL TO PIECES

Hyunseung went back to work on the fifth day, Friday; after he finally picked up the ninth call from his brother telling him he’s on his way back. He didn’t meet anyone at home when he got back, skipped the breakfast with his family and went straight to the office.

Yoseob came in 5 minutes after he arrived but instead of babbling like he always did, he took a seat in front of Hyunseung and stared at his friend’s face. Hyunseung ignored him completely, working on the pile of works on his desk. They stayed like that for almost 20 minutes, Hyunseung counted; when Yoseob finally opened his mouth.

“What’s wrong? Will you tell me?”

Hyunseung tore his gaze away from the paper he’s been reading since 15 minutes ago to look at Yoseob. “Why would anything be wrong?”

“You suddenly went for a vacation, which you never did unless I came along with Kikwang and Doojoon. Okay, sometimes Joon will tag along. You left your work without saying anything to me, at least to let me or Kikwang cover up for your work. You came this morning without even greet Joon, no trace of smile on your face, and where in the world you have been that you lost shine in your eyes? So yeah, something, no, everything is obviously wrong”

“Nothing’s wrong, okay. I just…have a lot in my mind lately”

“You always have a lot in your mind” Yoseob huffed in frustration. “We’re worried about you. You never answer our call. I think Kikwang cried every night. And Doojoonie misses you” he smiled widely.

“Isn’t that great? At least I know I have a lot of people that love me” Hyunseung replied with a grin.

“So want to tell me?” Yoseob was using his charming voice and face again to make Hyunseung spill all the secrets but Hyunseung responded by covering Yoseob’s face with his palm.

“I’m not going to fall into your –look at my puppy eyes and tell me everything- trap” Hyunseung laughed. “Lunch later. Me, you, Kikwang, and Doojoon. Now get up and go back to your room” he stood up to follow Yoseob’s steps and shoved the latter playfully out of his room.

I hope things will get better.

* * * * * * * * * *

Jiyong showed up for lunch, much to Hyunseung’s surprise. Jiyong wore his usual grin, making Joon squirmed uncomfortably beside Hyunseung on the couch when he poked his head out from behind the door.

“Ji, uh, didn’t expect to see you here” Hyunseung admitted, as Jiyong stepped in and flopped himself on the sofa in front of the two young men.

“Thought you need a company for lunch”

Hyunseung gulped. “I, um, promised to have lunch with my friends”

“Can I join the lunch?” Jiyong asked, leaning forward.

“Sure, why not?” Hyunseung breathe.

“Great”

“Uh, yeah. Give us 10 minutes then we will head out for lunch. Yoseob and the rest will meet us downstairs”

“No problem”

* * * * * * * * *

“Yah, you just come back from death?” Hyunseung had to roll eyes.

“Nice to see you again hyung” he scoffed and slapped Doojoon hard on his back. “Glad to know there will be one more person to miss me when I’m gone” it was Doojoon’s turn to roll his eyes at Hyunseung’s words.

“Where have you gone anyway? It’s so unlikely you to ignore my calls and messages”

“Oh, in case you’ve forgotten hyung, I’ve been ignoring all your attempt to stay in touch with me since I—“ Hyunseung stopped. “—you know, since a while” he was fidgeting on his seat and Jiyong threw him a knowing look.

Doojoon opened his mouth, ready to retort back when Jiyong beat him into it. “So Doojoon, how long you’ve been friends with Hyunseung?”

“Huh?” Doojoon titled to look at Jiyong, eyes narrowed. “Since we were in college. More like my boyfriend is Hyunseung’s friend so yeah” Doojoon said.

They chatted and shared stories throughout the lunch time, mostly about Hyunseung’s childhood stories. Luckily, none of them brought up the topic of Hyunseung’s gone missing. Hyunseung had to thank Jiyong for that; he managed to carry out the conversation without making Hyunseung felt uncomfortable of hiding something from his friends.

* * * * * * * *  * *

Hyunseung ignored all Junhyung’s efforts to contact him since then. He never picked up the calls and immediately deleted the message he received from Junhyung.

“You sure you don’t want to talk to him? Sort everything out?” Jiyong asked when Hyunseung ignored the call from Junhyung again.

Hyunseung nodded. “Yeah. There’s nothing to talk about anymore. This is the best for us. I’m trying to move on, Ji. And I want him to give his whole attention to Hara. If I talk to him, even for the last time, I don’t think I can let him go. The best way is to stay away from each other. It’s enough that he had to put an act of becoming my boyfriend. I started all this, so I should ended it too” Hyunseung breathed deep. “I just want everything to go back to normal. Hey, I’m starting to get my real life back” Hyunseung grinned cheekily.

“You mean hanging out with me and Joon? Partying with Kikwang and Yoseob? And a constant nag from Doojoon?” Jiyong raised his eyebrow.

“Isn’t that awesome? I’m having fun now. Aww Ji, don’t ruin it ‘kay. But of course, Doojoon’s nag is not awesome” Hyunseung pouted.

“Does he know you’ve broken up with Junhyung?”

Hyunseung gave a soft glare. “First of all, I’ve never broken up with Junhyung. It’s not like we’re tied to any relationship or sort of. And second, no, Doojoon doesn’t know anything. He’s just pissed off that I drag Yoseob out for almost every night now”

“But seriously Ji, I have to stay away from Junhyung from now on. It’s for our own good. But we must not tell anyone about this okay, at least not yet”

Jiyong shrugged. “If you say so”

* * * * * * * * * *

Junhyung put his phone back into his pocket, let out a heavy sigh. He rested his forehead against the window and closed his eyes. He could feel Seungho’s gaze on him but he was too tired to care about it. All he wanted right now was for Seungho not to drive like a snail, got home as soon as possible and sleep all night.

“Jun, you’re okay?”

“No, I’m not. He’s not picking up”

“Jun, you have to stop. There must be a reason why he decided to cut off everything with you”

Junhyung turned around. “Of course! Because I’m an I got mad at him for no reason. The last time I saw him I made him cried. Do you know how bad I feel about it? I won’t stop until I get to talk to him”

“So you think by talking to him again will make him feel better? Don’t you get it? Hyunseung knows why he shouldn’t talk to you. You hurt him, Jun. I’m sure he doesn’t want to get hurt again. Just please let it go”

“It’s not that easy” Junhyung turned his gaze outside the window. “I’ve been with him for months; I can’t just let him go like that” he didn’t want to get mad at Seungho. Seungho will never understand his feelings.

“You’re being selfish, Jun. Just stop, okay. If you keep doing this, you’re not only hurting Hyunseung, you’re hurting Hara too. Don’t say I didn’t notice how you treat Hara lately. She used to mean so much to you. Now you’re only thinking about Hyunseung”

“You think I didn’t know?” Junhyung finally snapped. “It’s freaking hurt just to think that I can go out with Hara without seeing Hyunseung’s crying face in my mind! You think I can just smile and be happy knowing that I hurt him and didn’t even apologize! You think I can just ignore Hara’s sour face when I keep dialling Hyunseung’s number? I’m just trying to make everything right again. And you don’t know anything, you ing don’t know anything!”

“Okay, I’m sorry”

Junhyung can sense the hurt in Seungho’s voice, he knew Seungho was just concerned and trying to be a good friend but he had so much in his mind. He wished he can say more, then the car stopped and they were already in front of Junhyung’s apartment building.

He was ready to get off the car when Seungho started to talk again.

“I know this is not a good time to ask you this. But they want to know if you’re still up for the trip”

Junhyung went rigid for a few seconds, before collecting himself to answer it. “I don’t know. I’ll get back to you later” then he’s off the car and headed straight into the building.

-TBC-