Joon’s point of view

“Yah Hajimaaa, move.” It was the morning that we were going to the carnival and Thunder insisted on getting in my way while I tried to brush my teeth. I’d lean to spit and he would continue to stand in front of the sink and move whenever I attempted to move around him. “Yah don’t you have something else to do? Go shower or something.” I suggested. For as early as it was he sure had a lot of energy. He just shook his head laughing trying to hold a laugh in his pink cheeks that eventually forced its way out of his mouth. “I can’t shower with hyung here.” “There is another bathroom Dongie you know that.” I said with a paste filled mouth before he moved aside and allowed me to spit it out. “But omma is sleeping I can’t disturb her.  I’d rather disturb you hyung.” That cheeky…. Anyway I just sighed and cleaned my face. “The bathroom’s all yours now Dongie, hurry up. I’m going to talk to omma.” After exiting the room I peeked back inside, though he’d been pestering me all morning I still thought it was cute and I still had to do one thing. “Oh Dongie what to you want for breakfast?”” He turned to me and his eyes light up like stars at the mention of food. “Ooh I want everything hyung, I got really hungry last night but I didn’t want to bother you…actually now that I think about it I didn’t really sleep too much because I kept thinking about food.” He lightly giggled, the corners of his eyes wrinkled as he pushed his to index fingers together innocently. Why he was so cute today, it was odd but maybe I was just more hyper aware of him because I’d never been around him in the morning …not for this long anyway. I went to check on his mom, she was still in bed and though I knew she may not have been feeling well she needed to get ready as well. I sat gently at the edge of the bed, placing one foot up on the bed frame and shook her arm very lightly. “Omma, it’s time to wake up…it’s carnival day remember?” She sat up and faced me. I was honestly frightened by the paleness in her skin. She had bags drooping under her eyes and her hair spiraled everywhere but her smile was no less cheerful when she opened her eyes and looked at me. “Oh it’s my Joonie. How are you this morning?” Her voice was a bit raspy but it cleared as she continued to talk. “I’m fine, we have to get going soon.” She just shook her head and rubbed my shoulder. Her hands were ice cold, that couldn’t be possible with how warm it was throughout the house and we gave her so many blankets just in case. “I want my sons to go out and have a good time together. They need to work on getting even closer I don’t want to stand in between that.” I took in her words for a few seconds. “Besides omma is too old to go to the carnival in her condition and this bed is too comfortable to leave.” She chuckled dryly before she began to cough, I just smiled at her. She was always telling jokes and that’s why it hurt to know that she probably never had even a minute that she wasn’t in pain. “Ommmmma, look!” Thunder came running into the room, he was soaking wet and in just a towel that was barely wrapped around his waist. Part of me wanted to scold him for just running around the house dripping wet and but …I got over it. “You remember that big scratch I got when I was little when daddy took me to the park and I fell on those rocks.” He pointed to an area high on his rib cage and turned so that his mother could see. “It’s almost gone, after all these years.” He sounded excited but then his voice trailed off and I wasn’t sure how he felt about it. Omma’s reaction was just nods and smiles but I could tell something was off about the whole situation. Dongie had never once mentioned his father and I knew better than to pry about people’s families. “Oh, omma why aren’t you getting ready?” She just fanned her hand at the question. “This is for you and Joonie to enjoy, I’ll be right here when you get back. Maybe if I can navigate myself around the kitchen I’ll even make my boys some dinner for when you returned home okay?” She was way more active after Dongie came into the room like she lit up her whole mood and gave her more energy. He crawled on the bed with wide eyes. “Do you want us to bring home anything from the carnival omma?” She palmed his face and pushed around his cheeks. “No my son, just have fun. Okay” she then whispered in his ear. “But if you can beat Joonie and game I’d like a cute stuffed animal, the biggest possible.” His mouth widened into a smile and he nodded. “Okay, I love you omma, very much.” He kissed her cheek and back crawled from the bed, his towel hardly even touching his body he pranced down the hallway. “I love you more son.” She yelled. “Okay, do you at least want breakfast, I’m going to fix us something before we get going. I was wandering if omma wanted anything special?” She shook her head to me again. “I just want to rest, I’m very peaceful today. If you want you can leave the food beside the bed and I’ll eat it gratefully when I wake up.” I nodded, getting use to her stubborn nature. By now I’d been recording a few moments. All my recordings became more and more natural. Omma squeezed my hands then I stood up from the bed and smiled at her. “I love you Joonie pie.” I blushed at the nickname but returned the love. “Rest well omma.” Remember when I mentioned that I wasn’t too upset about Dongie dripping wet around the house, I changed my mind after wandering into the hall and seeing all his long wet foot puddles trailing from the hallway bathroom. “Aish, Cheondoong you left your trail everywhere.” It was like taking care of a puppy. He jumped out of the bedroom fully dressed. It was like taking care of an adorable lovable spirited puppy…that was annoyingly cute. “Tada, look hyung I’m wearing yoooour clothes.” My eyes widened. “Who said you could put on my clothes, you have your own!” “But yours are warmer and nice I like them.” He laughed and hugged himself in my clothes and all I could do was sigh. He finally kept quiet for a little while as he ate the full breakfast I prepared stuffing his cheeks as usual and making exaggerated chewing and munching sounds. By the time I’d brought the food to her she was already seemed sound asleep but I left it there as she asked of me. She whispered to me “I want you to beat Dongie and win me the biggest prize possible or I won’t be happy.“ I smiled realizing the situation she was trying to create based on what she’d told Thunder earlier. “I’ll win the biggest and best for you omma. He won’t have a chance.” I leaned down and kissed her forehead and closed the door leaving it cracked open a bit. “Dongie we’re leaving get your shoes on.” I yelled. After eating and being up for a few hours his energy started to dwindle. His eyes lowered and he kept a faint grin on his face. “What now you’re sleepy?” He just nodded and yawned to me. He gripped my arm and leaned on my shoulder. His whole weight landing on the side of my body. “Thunder” I started to say a bit more softly. “Come on I can’t hold up your weight all the way to the car.” I said that but I had to hug and hold him up in the elevator and practically dragged him to the car. “You want to stay home Dongie? Are you that tired?” I was really concerned by this point. I hadn’t given him his medicine but I wasn’t sure if that was what was causing him to be so sluggish. “Mm-mm. I really want to spend the day with Lee Joon, I really want him to get good shots for his film. Hyung has to get a good grade.” He leaned his head the window and slept for most of the long drive to the carnival.

Thunder’s point of view

                I don’t know what hit me. I’m usually not so tired I’m use to moving forward. I missed my omma and wished she’d come with us. I wanted her to be home and I wanted to make her food and fluff her pillow and tucked more blankets over her. I was worried and maybe that’s what was draining. I really wanted to make her proud and beat Joonie hyung and get her a big stuffed animal from a carnival game. I didn’t really know what any of the games were like but I at least wanted to try my hardest for omma. Though she was smiling and laughing I could tell she was really weak today. Maybe she was trying to hide it from Joon but I’ve been taking care of omma my whole life and I knew today was a day that she’s been really down and she hasn’t been that way in a while….I didn’t want to leave her alone. Throughout the ride to the carnival I thought dreamt about her. She needed me. I wasn’t going back to hyung’s apartment without a giant prize to make her smile. “Doongie?” I looked over and he was shaking me. He looked worried about me I’ve never had someone look at me like that I was so use to looking at people like that. I finally felt the burden of having someone care about you. I wasn’t sure when Joon started to look at me like that I suddenly wanted to see all the recording we’d done together. I wanted to see if at any point he looked at me like that and how long his eyes were glossy and sad when he looked at me. I didn’t want to be so weak and vulnerable around him I was a strong person I was a man wasn’t I? I didn’t want to be someone he felt like he had to take care of I just wanted to be friends. It was a burden to have someone look at me as someone who always needed to be helped. I’ve been doing just fine this whole time the thought of him being this way and being able to tell his never been this way with anyone in his life was heavy and I started to cry. “Dongie are you okay, are you hurting anywhere?” He asked, his neatly brushed fringe falling just over his right eye. He slicked it back into place. I wiped my tears and shook my head with a smile. I let out a puffy laugh as I tried to pull back my tears. “No no.” I sniffled “Did you get a haircut hyung? Your hair looks really nice today.” He looked confused by my words and frowned. “What, what are you talking about, do you want to go home?” He called it home and it made me feel so warm inside that I wanted to sob more. “No we came all this way. I want a funnel cake and I want to win something nice for omma. I have to beat you or she won’t be happy.” Joon just faintly smiled and pinched my cheek. “She won’t be upset, because I’m going to be you so bad and win her the largest thing they have here and everyone will cheer for me and boo you.” He smiled proudly and then it was on. I jumped out the car and slammed the door shut before he could pull his keys out of the ignition or locked the car doors. “She won’t be so proud to know you didn’t beat me to the ticket booth!” I shouted before taking off across the parking lot toward the entrance of the park laughing madly. “Why you!” I heard the door slam half way through my sprint to my victory and heard his footsteps quickly approaching. I knew he was recording so it would be hard for him to run anyway. He attacked my back and wrapped himself around my body stopping me and laughing. He hugged me really tight and I felt a shock of heat run through my body. It was the warmest embrace I’d ever experienced from him I was blushing but it was a good thing it was cold so I doubt he could tell. “Cute” He exhaled lowly. He let go and bought the tickets and we finally go into the park.