Chapter 45

再见

Zàijiàn

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[Friday]

Tao is confused. He is so confused that he could feel his brain is going to explode because of it. His brain gears all working at the same time and working overdue makes his head ache in pain— almost making him dizzy, but thank goodness, he’s still in control and conscious.

His heart races in what to do, his mind demanding him an answer to all of the questions that was hurled down to him, but he can’t do any of those at all. He’s too confused on what to do. The choices that his father gave him were mad, but he couldn’t do anything to stop from choosing from one of them. If he answered that he won’t pick any of it, he knows that his father would make everything in a disaster just for him to submit to him. In simple terms, his father would take everything away from him and Tao wouldn’t be able to do anything to stop him.

‘What to do?’ he questions himself. Eyebrows furrow in deep worry, bottom lip bitten ‘til red and eyes glazed with fear and urgency as Tao tries to thinks what the best solution is for everything. Though he knows that the situation he is in now is really a lose-lose situation, the young male tries to make a solution for everything, even for the slimmest chance; he still wants to try.

‘Kris.’

Tao thought of him. The guy that he loves with all his heart that he is willing to sacrifice everything for him alone. He thought of what Kris has to say for this, but the younger knows that he can’t give a burden to someone that has no particular connection to him even though they are friends to begin with.

He doesn’t want to burden Kris. The guy is only a friend of his, nothing else and nothing more. It’s not that Kris has a particular duty to keep an eye of him either is fond of him or so to say loves him, but it’s only Tao. Tao couldn’t give him his problems, because Kris is really a no one to him. It would have been fine if they were lovers, but they weren’t at all and that gives a heavy weight on Tao’s heart.

And laying down the choices, Tao already knows what choice he is going to choose, yet he still wants to make up another choice for his future. A choice where everything will be fine and go back the way it is and this matter would be nothing at all. He still hopes, because it’s the only he could do. For now.

~

[Flashback]

“Give me a day and I’ll tell you my answer.”

Mr. Huang raises an eyebrow, an amused expression plastered on his face, a smirk threatening to appear.

“A day? You want a day, Zitao?” Mr. Huang repeats, almost mocking his son, but Tao restrains himself from pulverizing his father, knowing well his choices may be gone and everything will be in disaster or Mun or some bodyguards would appear and hold him back. He won’t take the chances and so he tries to calm himself down and waits for the approval which he knows his father would give it to him.

“A day, huh?” Mr. Huang pretends to ponder, even making a pose for it, but smiled at his son and nodded his head.

“Sure. Why not? My son, after all, needs some time to think about it,” he replies, voice playful and teasing, yet filled with finality to what he says. Gulping, Tao nods his head and leaves the house, heavy and weighed with a burden that he can’t lift off anytime soon.

‘A day. A day where I have to weigh everything and choose what is the best.’

That night, Tao couldn’t sleep at all. Too bothered and occupied that he can’t feel any sign of sleep even though he’s so exhausted. Too much thinking. Too much questions and answers.

He’s running out of time.

[End of Flashback]

~

He was up early in the morning, pondering on what to do. Though he would like to discuss this matter together with Luhan, he couldn’t because the older male is nowhere to be found and the hotel has been in somewhat slightly disturbed, but Himchan and Yongguk settled it for the time being.

He knows that he had to handle the hotel, but since he’s caught up in a dilemma, Tao couldn’t bring himself to manage the hotel when he, himself has a problem to take care of. He paces around his room for an hour, an interval between, but no matter what, he can’t find any solution at all.

He tried several times to come up with a solution, but all would lead to a definite doom of his and time is wasting. When he deemed that it is of no good, he resorts to sleep it off for awhile, since staying awake for the whole night until this morning plus the mad dilemma he is in, a migraine occurs and sleep is very much needed.

Tao dreamt off his past. A young Tao chasing after a cute bunny on the garden when they were back in Qingdao, China, and while on the chase, he didn’t see a tall kid just a meter where the bunny ran off and bumped into him. The young Tao was crying and the tall kid was panicking on what to do.

“Hey, hey. I’m sorry. Don’t cry.”

Despite his crying, the tears blurring his vision, young Tao could distinctly recognize the faint highlight of blonde on the dark brown hair of the kid who constantly tried to console him. It was a matter of time that a young Tao met with a young Kris.

When Tao woke up, the trail of tears running down on his face showed how much he treasured the little bits of his past and how Kris have been truly his first love ever since. His heart pounding against his chest, showing how much he missed the latter and their lost past together.

~

To: Kris

From: Zitao

Let’s meet up, Kris hyung. 4 pm at the 39^th building just beyond the piano shop.

Tao sent him a message, but Kris was too busy caught up in his matters to even realize that his phone has been vibrating on the passenger’s seat while he was on his way to meet up with Chanyeol.

~

Kris waits just by the corner of the alley, two blocks away from the 39^th building where he was supposed to meet up with Tao. Kris had called Chanyeol out to talk to him about Baekhyun since his step-brother has been glum when he arrived home this morning and Kris knew that it had got to do with Chanyeol.

Though the phone conversation didn’t really tell whether Chanyeol would meet up with him or not, Kris trusts the younger that he’ll come by. Thus waiting for 20 minutes for the younger after the expected time proved to be worth it since a young, tall, dark brown haired guy appears with sunglasses perched on his face and clothed with a white tank top hovered by a brown cardigan loosely along the fine denim pants and blue sneakers.

Kris wants to lecture him for being late, but the aura that the younger gives off made him keep his words and rethink about it. He takes a good look on Chanyeol when the younger stopped in front of him, feeling that something is off from the younger male.

“Chanyeol?”

“Hyung,” Chanyeol utters softly, “what is it that you wanted to say? I don’t have much time.”

Kris would have brushed it off as a normal thing, but when he sensed the urgency on the boy’s tone, he knew something was up.

“Chanyeol…is there something wrong?” he asks and he sees the slightest twitch on the corner of Chanyeol’s lips. The younger’s lips curled up into a small smile, covering up the problem that is almost revealed.

“It’s nothing, hyung.”

Kris could detect the lie through it, but he wouldn’t pressure the younger if he doesn’t want to talk about his own problem.

“If you don’t want to talk about it, then fine. But I want to ask you about Baekhyun, Yeol. Something is up and I know that it has to be with you.”

Silence settled on them for awhile when Chanyeol frowns suddenly, “When does Baekhyun’s problem concern me, Kris?” His voice clings with an unknown irritation and Kris couldn’t let that go.

“Park ing Chanyeol!” Kris yells and that caught Chanyeol in surprise. Good thing, they were hidden in the alleyway or else people would have casted them a look for their ruckus.

“Do you even have any idea how Baekhyun care about you so much?”

“What ar-" Chanyeol couldn’t continue when Kris cuts him off.

“Did you even know how much I loved you for all these past years? That I would do anything for you and you only? Do you even know? The suffering I had to bear all those years whenever you talk about your ex-lover and when you called someone else name no matter how much in pain you are and I was there all along with you, but you never looked at me. You never noticed me at all. As if I never existed in this planet. All those years, I loved you, stayed by your side and the sacrifice that I had to made, this is what you do?”

Even with sunglasses on, Kris knew the younger was shocked by his words. The small clatter at the side didn’t make him turn away at all when his eyes are only focused on Chanyeol.

“I…” Chanyeol felt his words drown in an unknown sea. He couldn’t continue. Not with this revelation hauled to him without warning. Kris loved him? All these years?

Kris takes a good deep breath before he sighs loudly and looks at the younger with gladness embedded on his eyes as he gazed on the person he used to love.

“But that is not the issue here, Yeol. I love someone else right now. I confessed my feelings for you to know that I sacrificed a lot. Just for Baekhyun and you. I sacrificed my love for you for both of your happiness. That’s why I wanted to know what happened between you and Baekhyun. I know that something had happened because Baekhyun had never left his room since he arrived this morning and clearly when something is up, it has to be concerned with you.”

Kris places his hands on the younger’s shoulder, a small smile gracing his face.

“So why do you have to say that Baekhyun’s problem is of no concern to you?”

Kris watches Chanyeol’s face fell into a frown, looking away from him in shame and embarrassment. Kris smiles because he knew that Chanyeol had done something that’ll make Baekhyun like this and judging by the way the younger had acted, his theory was proven to be true.

~

Tao feels choking up in pain. The wildfire of pain that spreads across his chest is just too unbearable. He tries to breathe in normally, but he can’t. Not like this at all. The pounding pain reaches his ears, mocking him for his fruitless love. Telling him how a fool he was for loving a man that has his heart for another one. Tao knew he was foolish, but it was his heart that is to blame. He never intended to fall for Kris, but it just came to that and Kris was just too unbearable not to fall head-over-heels all over again after they were separated 12 years ago.

‘Breathe.’

He tries, but he couldn’t. He gasps for air and hits his chest several times to take away the pain, but no matter how hard he does it, the pain doesn’t vanish at all. Tears slide down across his cheeks, burning and filled with pain and agony.

‘Stupid.’

Stupid he was truly, but Tao thought that it doesn’t matter at all. When he spent more time with the older, he thought that it doesn’t matter if he was stupid. But after hearing the confession, Tao knew he is a fool for deluding himself that Kris would also feel the same way as he would. He was foolish for thinking that way.

Now, the pain in his chest won’t vanish away that easily. It would haunt him to mock him for his foolishness for loving that man and he wouldn’t get away with it until he is tortured enough to learn his lessons.

‘It hurts.’

He hides in an alleyway, where people rarely visited anymore due to the destroyed and abandoned feelings and where rumors say that it is the base of the thieves and serial killers. He cries there, venting out his pain all together, because he was foolish and because it hurts.

He felt a hand on his shoulder and he looks up with tears on his eyes, blur, yet he could still see the distinct features of the person and the promising identification of accessories in front of him. An earring that hangs an orb of blue and red and a faint hourglass that hangs around his neck made its distinction and Tao doesn’t need another clue who it was.

When the person crouches in front of him, Tao pulls him into a hug and cries on his chest, silent, yet the pain is more pronounced than ever it is voiced out. The latter wraps his arms around him, patting his back and consoling him to the best of his abilities.

“It’s okay…everything will be okay.”

~

When Kris had finally gotten himself out of his drastic plan to find out what happened between Chanyeol and Baekhyun, he had decided to grab some bite on the nearby convenience store. It turns out after confessing his unknown love to Chanyeol to drag out what happened, it backfired. When Chanyeol looked away, the younger insisted that it was nothing at all and ran off with him yelling Chanyeol’s name.

His plan backfired and Kris knew that trying to be an investigator couldn’t really be a part of his hobbies, because clearly, it didn’t work on Chanyeol at all. All the frustrations and hard work made him hungry and because he was overly pissed off, he went off to the nearest convenience store to get some drink to cool down and a sandwich to calm down the growling of his stomach.

Eating halfway his sandwich, Kris realized that he forgot his phone in his car and hadn’t really brought it with him the entire time. Sighing at his foolishness, he quickly finishes off his sandwich and threw his trash into the bin and left the store.

Getting in, Kris takes his phone from the passenger’s seat and noticed that he had a message from Tao.

To: Kris

From: Zitao

Let’s meet up, Kris hyung. 4 pm at the 39^th building just beyond the piano shop.

Kris’s eyes widen at what he read. ‘What?’  He throws his phone at the passenger’s seat again and puts on the seatbelt and steps on the pedal, frantic and scared.

‘Since when did he sent me a message?’

Since the distance was near, it only took him 5 minutes to get there, slamming the door shut and running to the 39^th building.

“TAO!” he yells, but no one answered. He runs around the area, yelling the younger’s name, but he can’t sight him anywhere. Kris runs a hand through his hair, frustrated and angry at himself. How could he be so careless at times like this?

Running back to his car, he opens the passenger’s door and takes out his phone, opening the message again and tries to look at what time did the younger sent it to him.

3:37 pm.

Kris could feel color drain away from him fast. That time. It was the time when he was on the car to meet up with Chanyeol around 3:45 pm and had to wait up another 20 minutes before the younger came. He didn’t even notice it and got carried away with his own matter and had to sulk away to grab a bite in a nearby convenience store, completely wasting another 30 minutes.

It’s been more than 40 minutes since Tao’s message and Kris had utterly failed to get a hold of Tao when he tried to call him. He growls lowly and the people passing by turn to look at him, but he doesn’t give a care at all.

“ it, Tao answer you damn phone!” he hissed when he tries again, but failed again when he was directed to the voicemail. The younger rarely sent him a message to meet up with him and it mattered because when the younger messages him, it meant that whatever they are talking about is important. But because he was carried away with his own damn problem, Kris couldn’t let go the fact that he had basically indirectly ignored the younger’s message, especially when he had came to the conclusion where he liked the younger.

Kris grits his teeth and lightly kicked his car in frustration, scolding himself for the mess he is now. He had a bad feeling about this.

~

“My, my. Why if it isn’t my dearest Tao!” Mr. Huang cheerfully greets his son, who came in with a blank face plastered on his face and Mun by his side with his usual poker face. He noticed that something was off, but he didn’t really dwell on much with it, but he would like to play for a bit fun.

Mrs. Huang was seated at the couch near him, her eyes gazed at her husband with disgust by his pretentious acts of being happy and all. She softly sighed and shakes her head, accepting that this is the husband that she married. She knew that her husband has always been a pretentious type and no one really knew his character. His personality would always drift off to different degrees and it would always sicken her that she couldn’t put it up with him. But taking notice of his happy aura, Mrs. Huang takes note that she preferably likes this personality even though it may have been twisted on its own ways.

“Why the sour mood, my son?” his father says with concern, yet the smile plastered on his face says otherwise. Tao didn’t respond much to it, he only gazed at him with those soulless eyes and Mr. Huang could feel his smile widening a bit.

“Did someone run over your cat? Or did someone bully you? Oh, wait. What if...” he pauses and smirks. Mrs. Huang notices it and tries to stop her husband from whatever he has to say, because she knew it was up to no good, at all.

“Chun, honey, sto-“

“Did your little Kris dump you? Oh, my bad. Did that happen? My, I’m sorry. I never knew. Well, of course, he would. You told him after all. And besides, the man doesn’t like yo-”

“Chun!”

Mr. Huang looks at his wife briefly and noticing his wife’s cold glare, he knew that he had to stop. Sighing in defeat, he makes a motion to his wife that he’ll stop and Mrs. Huang silently sighed in relief.

“My lord,” Mun spoke in the brief silence they had and Mr. Huang looks up with a small smile on his face. Mun bows his head in respect and briefly glanced at Tao who was at his side and gave back his attention to Mr. Huang.

“Young master has his answers now.”

Laughter and applause echo around the mansion, the butlers and maids caught in a sudden startle from what they heard that came from their lord. They didn’t spoke a word to why he is like that, fearing their lives would be scorched when they would open their mouth about it, especially when their master is of like the Satan itself. They weren’t safe.

Mrs. Huang merely looks at her husband twisted self as he laughs over something that is not be laughed, contemplating whether to interrupt or not, but decided not to. Mr. Huang finally stops his crazed laughter, but the wide smile that spread on his face showed that he was beyond satisfied by it and that he would laugh any other time soon.

“So what’s the answer, Mun? What does my dear son say?” Mr. Huang asks, the excitement lingers in his voice as he waits for Mun to speak about his son’s answer.

Tao closes his eyes and a tear left his eye, slowly sliding down across his cheek. Mun stares at him for a moment before sighing and looks at Mr. Huang for a bit before he closes his eyes and spoke.

~

To: Kris

From: Zitao

~

“I’m sorry, sir, but Mr. Huang Zitao hasn’t checked in yet and Mr. Lu hasn’t come out from his room yet also, sir. I’m deeply very sorry for this.” Yuan bows apologetically to him and Kris could only do was ruffle his hair in annoyance.

“Thank you. If you ever have any notice regarding about Zitao and Luhan, please do inform me, okay? You got my number, right?” Kris says, almost pleadingly to Yuan and the secretary could only do was nod.

“Yes, sir.”

When Kris was finally out off the hotel and was in the middle of going down the staircase, his phone vibrated in his pants and he took a moment to stop to check who it was and hoping it was Tao. Thankfully, yes, it came from Tao and Kris was never more than happy that finally, Tao messaged him again after his several sorry on the voicemail.

Opening up the message, Kris stared at the message delivered to him and in a moment, Kris felt energy drain away from him. The color leaving him when suddenly, his legs felt wobbly that he had to support himself by the rail; thankfully, he was at the side when he was going the marble staircase outside the hotel.

Kris felt the sudden confusion and pain riled up inside of him. All too sudden and burning.

 

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再见-Zàijiàn-Goodbye

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"Two paths, difficult and risky, only one will be chosen."

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And now, I have finally posted up Taoris chapter. Yep, the next 5 would be solo chapters. The days would be random, though, and I hope I wouldn't be able to confuse you. Just remember that from Chapter 43 up to the next 5 chapters happened in only one week, okay?

Yeah...and i have survived from your haunting...for only a brief time, though.

Well, I pointed out some hints, right? Especially how Kris felt for Tao. Oh, I hope you spot the small clatter. :D

Now, I shall go back to hiding, but before that, let me say hello to the new subbies!

Hello and hope you have a great time!!

Now, that's done...bye! Love ya, chu~

/hides again to the place that never existed in earth/

*whispers/you probably still hate me for what I've done in the previous chapter, huh?/ ehem/whispers*

Bye!