Chapter 32: Echoes of Past 2.1

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Jongdae looks at the pouch of cookies he has in his hands. He baked it with his whole-heart last night for Minseok. It’s not a special day or so, but Jongdae felt the need of giving something to Minseok to show his love for the older.

A smile bloomed on his face, as he stares at the cookies in the mint silky pouch tied with a silver ribbon and a small card inside the pouch. He plans to drop it inside the older’s locker, like a high-school teenage girl who doesn’t have any courage at all and decides to drop it as the person’s secret admirer.

Yes, Jongdae’s a bit delusional and thinks about fantasy a bit, but that’s not the case at all. All that is important is for him to drop the pouch of cookies to Minseok’s locker and go back to class.

 

Jongdae coughs out, quite hard and restricted and he finds himself drinking some water afterwards, thanking Eunhyuk for the glass of water. His flu didn’t go away, he figures out, and he doesn’t even want to think about when the nasty flu is going to leave.

He wasn’t supposed to go to work with his condition of his, Kyungsoo says to him through a piece of paper, but he assured his younger brother, telling him that he’ll be fine if he doesn’t do strenuous works. Kyungsoo sighs, giving up with his stubborn older brother and just reminded him to text him if he needs anything or so.

Jongdae was happy when he got Kyungsoo’s approval, happy by the fact that he could start work again. Jongdae thought about whether not to go to work at all or should go, but then, he remembered that the Wu’s younger son’s birthday is in just a few days! And that’s how Jongdae ends up picking to go to work.

The brunette sighs while mixing the cream, feeling his energy slowly away from him. He feels terribly cold, and to add to his worst condition, he feels a very terrible headache and the older tries hard to ease it.  The staffs inside the kitchen, casts him a worry glance, worrying about his condition and worrying that he might faint any time soon.

Sungmin stops chopping the strawberries, handing it to Jieun, who just nodded her head and starts chopping the strawberries and other fruits on the counter, approaches Jongdae and places a comforting hand on the latter’s shoulder.

“What’s up, Min?” Jongdae hoarsely questions, feeling his throat dry up again after he had just drank water awhile ago. He mixes the cream a bit faster, trying to fight back the laziness that starts to creep on his body. Sungmin worriedly looks at him, noticing how frail, weak and pale Jongdae is.

“Jongdae-ah, I think you need to rest. Your body won’t take it if you continue to work!” Sungmin chides to him that made Jongdae finishes up the last streak of cream and hands it down to one of the chefs before facing the older.

“I’m fine, Min,” he replies dryly, but his physical and mental condition proves otherwise and Sungmin could see that very well.

“Ah, yes. But you don’t look fine to me. Go back home and take a rest, Jongdae. You need it,” Sungmin stated and Jongdae casts him a wary glance.

“I don’t need it, Min, I’m perf-,” he stops when his body almost collapses to the ground, but thankfully, Sungmin’s reflexes are fast and his body and face didn’t smash to the cold floor. Sungmin helps him stand up, Eunhyuk and the other chefs and assistants scurries off to his side, worry etches at their face. Jongdae sighs, completely given up the fact to continue working with his condition. He really can’t continue working with his condition, and he’s afraid that his sickness might affect his fellow workers and so are the food.

He can’t risk having that.

He sighs one more time, letting Sungmin drag him to a vacant dine and let him sit before leaving to get his things. Jongdae could feel the pain in his head worsen and the feeling of wanting to rest grew intense and how Jongdae wishes to go to bed and sleep it off.

Sungmin comes back, with his satchel and a glass of water to help him regain some strength.

“Are you sure you’re going to be okay? I could call Kyungsoo to fetch you up.”

Jongdae shakes his head, totally not approving the idea, "I’m okay, Min. I could handle myself. Don’t call Kyungsoo, I’ll be able to get back to the house by myself,” he assures the older with a weak smile, but Sungmin doesn’t agree with his decision.

“No, Jongdae! I’ll call Kyungsoo to fetch you up. You can even barely walk with your condition!” Sungmin scolds him making Jongdae hiss at the adding noise in his head. His head feels dizzy but he shakes his head, completely firm at the decision he made.

“I’m fine, Min. Don’t worry about it. Just, just handle the shop while I’m gone, okay?” Jongdae reminds him before standing up, holding the edge of the table for support to stand up, and takes his leave with careful steps.

Sungmin couldn’t do anything to stop the brunette from getting his way. The older watches the retreating back of his boss and when the younger is no longer in his line of sight, he pinches the bridge of his nose, completely frustrated because of Jongdae.

He silently prays that he’ll be okay and will be back in the house in one piece before taking his leave and attends to his duty in the kitchen.

 

Jongdae feels his body is going to collapse soon and his house is still far away. The pounding pain in his head hurts a lot and his body feels jelly and he really wants to lie in his bed for rest and comfort. He finds himself in the bus stop, thanking God that he was able to go this far. He just needs to take a bus and walk some more before he reaches the house and Jongdae hopes he’ll reach it.

He settles himself in the bench, closing his eyes and resting his body a bit so that he could have some energy to move later on. A familiar boy settles beside him, concern and worry etched on the person’s face.

“Jongdae-ah.”

Jongdae doesn’t need to know who it is, for he knew who the person is even without opening his eyes. He doesn’t answer, feeling his head very light and all of his energy draining away from him. The person looks at him in worry, trying to figure out what to do.

Jongdae lets out a small sigh before consciousness leaves him and darkness and sleep claims him.

 

 

Chanyeol learned some new facts about Baekhyun, thanks to Kris, who is Baekhyun’s step-brother. He found out that the younger lost his voice because of trauma that causes his sound function to freeze. He also learned that it is Baekhyun’s choice whether to speak or not, but there’s a zero percent chance for him to be able to speak.

He learned a lot of new facts, about Baekhyun’s family who died in a car accident and somehow it has to happen in front of Baekhyun causing him to lose his voice in shock and in trauma, the adoption of Baekhyun to the Wu’s and how Baekhyun lost his memories of the past and others.

It wasn’t pleasant at all for Chanyeol. Not really pleasant at all. Yes, it’s saddening to hear about those, but definitely not okay for Chanyeol.  He feels worried for the older, wondering if he ever tried to speak again or at least try to regain back his lost memories.

And that’s’ why he is here. Sitting on his usual dine, a mug of mocha and a plate of slice blueberry cake not too far away from the mug. He takes a sip on his mocha, feeling the bittersweet taste of the drink caressing his tongue. Baekhyun is playing the piano today, but it’s his last and another employee would take over the piano.

Baekhyun’s playing Frederic Chopin’s Minute Waltz and Chanyeol smiles at the play, it’s one of his favourites after Pachelbel’s Canon in D. Minute Waltz has its own rhythm, but Baekhyun played it a bit sentimentally, soulful and a bit meaningful for the music to be carried out. Even though, it is likely not the same than the original, Chanyeol could still hear the main points of the music and he is glad that Baekhyun didn’t forget about that.

Chanyeol smiles bit, taking a bite on his blueberry cake, before shifting his gaze outside, a bit daze and occupied with thoughts.

 

[Baekhyun’s Point of View]

“Hi, hyung,” Chanyeol greeted me with his usual smile. I smiled as my response to his greeting, after settling myself in the seat in front of him. I noticed that he bought one of the new cakes that the other chefs and I made up that made me smile a bit.

“How’s school?” I asked, wondering how things are in his school, if anything happened while he was there. Chanyeol takes a sip on his mocha, before placing it back to the table and responded to me,

“Everything’s fine. The same as always, and the semester is almost done, though.”

I nod my head, knowing full well what he meant there because I had gone through hat also, but somehow quite fun because I have Jongdae and Minseok as my friends back then, but still it’s hard to see how things end up this way though.

“Is everything alright, hyung? You seem to be thinking of something,” Chanyeol asked with a raised eyebrow. I smiled a bit before shaking my head, telling him it’s nothing. Other problems are not our concerns, anyways.

Ailee brought my food and I mouthed a ‘thank you’ before I took a bite on my sandwich, finally supplying my hungry stomach. In the corner of my eyes, I could see Chanyeol smiling at me and I feel my cheeks burn up a bit. Sheesh, what’s wrong with me these days?

“Hey, hyung…” I cast him a glance, before taking another bite on my sandwich. His eyes were focused outside when he spoke up,

“Did you ever thought of having your voice back?” he asks, before meeting my gaze; our eyes locking together that somehow formed a certain connection.

“I heard from Kris hyung, if you are wondering,” he tells before finishing off his blueberry cake. I took a sip on my strawberry shake, trying to ease my dry throat. I gulped, not really wanting to talk about it, but after having locked eyes with the younger, I couldn’t help but give in to him and tell him what I think of.

“I did, but I gave up a year ago. I somehow lost hope of regaining my voice back,” I answered back, a bit bitter than I intended to say it. He nods his head, as if understanding what I’m trying to point out. I sighed; it doesn’t really matter to me if I will have my voice back or not. As long as I could live in this world, then that’s fine already.

“But do you want to have your voice back? Do you want to hear your voice back then?” he says in a strange way that made me look at him. And seeing his face, I just noticed that he is worried, kind of concerned for me. I thought for awhile, thinking what I should answer to him. And after a few moments, I finally came up with an answer.

“It would be great to have my voice back. I want to know how it sounds like,” I sincerely replied to him. It’s true, I really want to have my voice back despite my previous answer of giving up; I still have some hope of having my voice back.

He smiles at me, genuine and sincere and I could feel my heart race from his smile. What’s wrong with you, Baekhyun? I could feel the blush creep up again on my cheeks and I quickly took my shake, sipping it. I heard Chanyeol chuckle and I gave him a glare and he held out a hand, surrendering and I smirked a bit.

This kid is really funny.

“How about I help you regain your voice again, hyung?”

 

“How did you get this hyung?” Worry laced on the younger’s voice and Baekhyun flinched on the tone he got and the anger slips away in the air.

Chanyeol looks up and Baekhyun, again, felt his heart beats faster than usual and felt a blush on painting on his face.

The look was innocent, sincere and a bit of worry was evident in his eyes and Baekhyun was taken back. And what came next was unexpected.

“Take care of your fingers, hyung. You need them.”

And he kissed those delicate fingers of him and made Baekhyun lose his heart for once.

 

I looked at him in shock, almost spurting out the shake that I’m drinking. He smiled at me, as if what he said is normal for him. I warily glanced at him as I placed my shake back on the table.  I crossed my arms on my chest, completely not buying what he said.

He seems to caught my doubtful expression as the corner of his lips tug upwards, forming into a cheeky smile.

“It may take time, hyung. But I could assure you that you’ll get your voice back!” Chanyeol exclaims before putting up his mega-watt smile. I raised my eyebrow before his face fell like a kicked kitten. Yeah, kitten. My heart swells with affection and warmth through his offer of help. And suddenly I got my hope back again, wanting to find ways to have my voice back.

I smiled at him, showing my approval of him helping me regain my voice back. After seeing my smile, his face broke out with the most beautiful smile I could have ever seen.

“You won’t regret it, hyung. I’ll make sure to have you regain your voice back.”

 

For a moment, Baekhyun was petrified in his place. Dumbfounded at what Chanyeol is doing. Chanyeol gently caress his bandaged fingers, eyes trained on the bandaged fingers; filled with concern and worry.

After a few more seconds, Baekhyun finally broke out from his reverie of shock. Quickly, he retreats his hand back, away from Chanyeol’s hold. He held his hand and gave Chanyeol a glare, but quickly dissipates when he saw the younger’s pained expression. An expression that made his heart aches.

Why does he have that pained expression? Why does he look at me like that? What did I do wrong? I should be angry with him but why am I thinking about his pained expression? Baekhyun thought to himself.

Somehow, Chanyeol’s pained expression hurts him a little and he doesn’t know why. Hesitantly, his (uninjured) hand left his injured hand and went to clasp with Chanyeol’s hands that were resting on the table.

His eyes locked with Chanyeol and he bitterly asks,

“What’s wrong?”

Chanyeol easily picked up the question and bitterly smiles.

“I’m sorry for your fingers, hyung. I’m really sorry. If I didn’t get angry at you and broke the vase, you wouldn’t get hurt.”

Baekhyun blinks at his sudden apology. He raised his eyebrow as if confirming that Chanyeol is sincerely sorry. Chanyeol laughs at Baekhyun’s doubtful expression.

“Hyung, I’m really sorry for what I did to you. I’m sorry for the things I have done. Even though I’m not qualified to tell you this, for all the things I have done, I just hope you forgive me for what I did, and let’s start anew?” Chanyeol nervously said to Baekhyun who judge with doubtful expression.

Baekhyun digested what Chanyeol said and eventually sighed. He nodded his head and smiled to the younger. Chanyeol’s ears perked up and his eyes gleamed with cheekiness and delight.

Clasping Baekhyun’s hands, Chanyeol smiles with genuine as Baekhyun forgave with his childish acts.

“Thank you hyung. Thank you so much.”

Seeing the younger happy, Baekhyun couldn’t help but smile also.

Their friendship after all is strong and nothing could break them apart.

[End of Baekhyun’s Point of View]

 

[Minseok’s Point of View]

I looked at Jongdae with worry and concern. He looks so deathly pale, thin and definitely weak. His condition grew worse than before the last time I saw him and seeing him almost claiming death makes my heart ache in pain.

I brushed away the bangs that cover his beautiful face that, I, still adore and cherish. He still looks so beautiful even when sick and I fid myself wondering why fate is so cruel to me. After seeing him in the bus stop, I rushed to his side, noticing how sickly he is. After a few minutes, he collapsed and I panicked. I first thought of bringing him to the hospital, but then, I remembered that he doesn’t like hospital at all, and I ended up bringing him to my place.

After placing him on my bed, I changed his clothes except for his brief after all, and changed him with my clothes that really fits him perfectly and attended to his condition after. I called up a doctor not too long ago, asking him to come over and check my friend up. The doctor told me that he is going to be fine if he takes a lot of rest and eat lots of nutritious food and takes in a higher degree of medicine.

I knew from the start that he is a healthy individual, but when sickness comes and takes over him, his condition worsens that sometimes, he is in a brink of death already. And that worries me. I don’t like him being sick at all, because it hurts me a lot, seeing him sick and weak and resting in bed.

But yet again, that doesn’t only worry me at all. Aside from his health, I worry about him. His heart and self is what I’m worrying about. He rarely smiles genuinely and most of it is fraud and so does are his laughs. I knew I was the cause of the Jongdae now and him being cold to me is definitely what I reap from what I have done in the past.

I regret everything that I have done in the past, completely regretting it with all my heart. I wished to turn back time, but who am I to do that? Sungyeol is right about everything takes time, but I wonder how long? Will it take years for his scars to heal? Will it takes years for him to forgive me for what I have done to him? I didn’t mean everything at all in the past.

 I watched his sleeping form with a bitter and sad smile, leaning in and placing a chaste kiss on forehead before I retreat back and leave the room. I can’t let him stay here, even though I want to, I can’t do so.

He hates me, after  all. And if he wakes up, seeing that he is in my room, I don’t know how to handle his reaction. I’m already hurting every day, hurting by the fact that he’s ignoring me, so cold to me, so close yet so far and him being not at my side anymore.

It all hurts and if I see him with a disappointed face, just by realizing what room he is, I think I can’t handle it.

I stopped mid-way on the stairs, pocketing out my phone and texting someone who I knew very well.

Kyungsoo.

 

 

After an hour and a half, Kyungsoo bows to me, apologizing for the intrusion and the mess that he his brother had caused. I smiled sadly at him,

“It is okay, Kyungsoo. Don’t worry about it,” I assured him with a smile. He looks doubtful at my words and I sighed.

“It’s okay. You don’t have to apologize. I did a lot of horrible things in the past and I should be the one saying sorry about the things that I have done to Jongdae.”

He looked at me with those soulful eyes, just like Jongdae’s eyes and I smiled at him.

“I’m okay, hyung.”

After a few minutes, he finally nods his head, turning his heels away but turned his head to mouth something to me before he takes his leave. I smiled sadly at him, walking to the front door and watch the car goes away.

“Thank you, Minseok hyung.”

 

Jongdae could feel his heart tearing into two, as he watched Minseok throw the pouch of cookies to the bin, not bothering to take a look what is inside. He could feel the tears well up in his eyes as he watched the familiar senior girl approaches Minseok with her sickening smile. He watches Minseok smile at her with affection and Jongdae wonders if Minseok loves him.

He turns his head away, letting the tears flow out from his eyes before taking his leave.

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A/N: And Chanyeol wants to help Baekhyun regain his voice back and we see Minseok's regretting the past and another hurtful past of Jongdae's.

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