November  15

Siwon’s greed knows no limits. People are dying of hunger and many have no money to buy even the basics and yet he keeps asking for more. He had another meeting with Kyuhyun about new taxes; apparently he wants everybody who has a well to pay extra money every year. That doesn’t even make sense! Why would they have to pay money just because they have a well in their garden?  I swear to God the only thing he thinks about is money. Money, money, money, money.

The citizens can’t take it anymore. They are in a tight situation, their choices are limited and hundreds of people are losing their jobs everyday because of the cutbacks the companies had to make to make ends meet with the hike in taxes. Thousands of small shops have closed, turning the once buzzing with life shopping districts into cemeteries. The few times I took the time and walked around the city, the roads that usually were so crowded that you could barely walk among the people, now are deserted, the shops closed, their windows and doors barricaded. The storehouses refuse to sell medicine to the pharmacies because they know nobody can afford to pay for them. People fall sick everyday without hope of recovering.

We are at a point that people have lost all of their hope. Everyday more and more protesters gather outside the House of Parliament. They don’t scream, they don’t fight, they don’t even throw things at the Disciplinary Squad members who form a protective circle around the Parliament. They are just protesting silently, waiting, always waiting. So many of them gather outside everyday, that Kyuhyun and Seohyun had to move out of their Mansion and into a smaller house near the Iron Gate Bridge. Everything was done in secret, hoping that no citizen would find out about the new location of their house. Lately are forced to leave the Parliament from the back door to avoid the protesters. Kyuhyun doesn't seem happy about it. I can see that the whole situation is very disturbing for him.

I tried to confront him about it. A week ago he was sitting in his office, going through some papers, dark circles under his eyes, his complexion paler than usual. I had just arrived and he still hadn’t noticed me so I knocked the door even though it was wide open. He flinched and looked at me surprised but his expression soon softened. I don’t want to admit it but when he smiled at me I almost forgot how to breathe.

“Are you okay?” I asked him, and I knew that I was genuinely worried for him.

“Been better, but you know me, I can handle worse than that” he replied reassuringly but I could see that he was lying. “You know, we can’t have a proper conversation if we are standing ten meters apart” he exclaimed and chuckled softly when I hesitated to move closer.

I felt my face blushing but still I tried to look confident when I approached him. “You look exhausted, shouldn’t you take a break?” He shook his head, but did as I told him. He leaned back in his chair and patted the desk in front of him. I obediently sat on the desk next to him.  “If this is so tiring for you why don’t you put an end to it?” I asked him, almost pleaded him really.

He let a long sigh and considered my question for a few seconds. “It’s not that simple Sunny. I’m not making the decisions on my own. There are 300 congressmen involved in this as well”

He squeezed his eyes shut and then opened them wide in an attempt to stay awake. “You need sleep” I observed even though it was pretty obvious. I saw him smirk and before he could change the subject I continued asking him about politics. “Mr. Choi seems to be involved in everything...”

His eyes darkened and his pursed his lips until they formed a thin line. He does that almost every time he feels pressured or annoyed. “Siwon, yeah he is involved in pretty much everyting” - he paused for a moment in deep thought – “then again he comes from an old family that has always been involved with politics” he muttered more to himself than me.

For a few minutes we sat in silence. After a while, I thought that he had fallen asleep and I got up to give him some time to rest but he grabbed my wrist and held me back. His eyes were still closed but he was definitely awake. “Stay. If you leave, all my worries and troubles will come back to torment me. Keep me company, talking to you helps me relax” he pleaded in a low voice.

“Sure, whatever you want” I tried to think of something to start a conversation that wouldn’t be related to the protesters or the economic situation of the country but it was easier said than done. “How’s Maggie?” I asked finally.

His eyes light up immediately. “She is growing up well, she has gotten a lot bigger since the last time you saw her. You should actually come and see her, after-” he left his sentence incomplete and his expression got dark again. I didn’t have to try much to guess what he wanted to say. You should come and see her after the protest is over.

I bit my lip hesitating for only a moment. I would ask sooner or later. “Kyuhyun?” His eyes weren’t looking at me but I knew that he was paying attention at what I was saying. “Why… why don’t you stop Siwon? I mean, Sooyoung is against him as well and I know Jessica would help you” I blurted out before I had time to regret it.

His troubled eyes met mine, making my heart skip a beat. “If I could, I would have. But there are many problems you still don’t know about” he answered.

“Problems? You mean there are more problems that the citizens don’t know about?” I required surprised that he had managed to keep something so important from me.

He smiled sweetly at me. “Of course. But don’t worry about it, I’m trying to solve them as we speak”  

“I’m supposed to be here to support you though” I whispered, reaching for his hand without even realizing it. When my mind finally caught up with my body, our fingers were already intertwined. I knew that my face had taken a shade of deep red but Kyuhyun seemed pretty satisfied so I didn’t try to pull away. Soon he really did fall asleep, his grip on my hand relaxed and yet I didn’t want to let go. A few stolen moments of happiness when the whole world seems to be against us, when war is just around the corner, when we could be separated any moment now, is that too much to ask for?

I tried to fight it, I tried to keep myself away but in the end it’s true what they say. You can’t choose who will steal your heart.

I didn’t know it back then, but everything Kyuhyun tried to keep secret, or at least most of them would be almost revealed to me pretty soon. It happened today actually.

I was getting tired of always feeling somebody’s eyes on my back, so when I sensed somebody following me after leaving work, I decided to take a walk - a walk to the March 25^th Square to be exact. I knew very well that not many people pass from there right now, when all the shops are closed. I waited to make sure I could hear footsteps following me and then I turned around without a warning.

I came face to face with a woman about my height, with long honey brown hair, that fell heavy around her shoulders. She was wearing a pair of tight jeans and a grey shirt with what looked like a tribal design printed on it underneath a black leather jacket. She was surprised to say the least when our eyes met. For a moment I thought she was going to run away but then she regained her composure and gave me an icy glare.

“So you did know I was following you. Sooyoung was right about you, you are smart” she hissed. I was confused. Sooyoung? What did Choi Sooyoung had to do with this woman? She noticed my puzzled expression and chuckled softly. She offered her hand for a handshake but I was still hesitant. “Kim Taeyeon, leader of the revolutionary army” she told me and her grin grew wider when she saw my panicked expression.

“Golden Dawn?” was the only thing I could ask.

She looked annoyed at the mention of that name. “No, we are not Golden Dawn. We are not some sort of secret organization and we are not a club” she said, irony dripping from her every word. “We are an army. We don’t have a name and we surely don’t plan on doing whatever the media have been saying all this time. I’m surprised you fell for those lies. Sooyoung gave me the impression that you could see past their camouflage” she snickered.

“Lies? How can they all be lies? And what does Choi Sooyoung has to do with me?” I asked bewildered.

“Good questions. Too bad I can’t answer them now.” she told me briefly nodding with her head towards the buildings around us. I knew what she meant. It was too dangerous for the two of us to talk in the middle of the street. Maybe she had already risked too much just saying her name and her position in the revolutionary army. We agreed to meet back in my house in two days. I’ve already told Hyoyeon and we’ve both asked for a day off.

Before we parted she leaned closer and whispered to me “Everything he’s been keeping from you and all the lies he has told you, I can tell you about them”

She didn’t have to mention his name for me to understand who she was referring to. Finally, I have a chance to see who Kyuhyun really is and yet I am scared. I am scared that I won’t like what I will find out, that I will be hurt. I let myself become vulnerable and now I might pay for it. 

~ ~ ~ ~

Yes, I know this is late. I was planning on posting this two days ago but then I got kind of depressed because of chemistry... 

So people, tell me how you feel about this chapter with a comment, okay? I need something to cheer me up