Daylight comes. Dried tears can be seen around Hyuna's eyes. Last night was a bad nightmare for her. What a pity she couldn't wake up from that nightmare even after she opened her eyes. She heard knocks coming from the front door. She was still weak and did not even bother to put a stop to the continuous knocks. She closed her eyes back lazily and hugged her long bolster tightly, imagining it was him.

The knocks stopped and the sound of keys and door opening were heard. Footsteps on the stairs travelled from the living room to the second floor, right infront of their bedroom. There was a faint knock followed by the door being opened. Two ladies emerged from the outside, peeping into the room. Smiles spread across their faces, seeing their sleeping friend. They went to her sides, one kneeling on the floor and the other on the bed, behind Hyuna.

Jiyeon noticed the dried tears and managed to stop Hyemi on time before she tried to shake Hyuna violently, to wake her up. She pointed to Hyuna's face and look at her with full of concern. Neither of them knows what had happened last night. Gently, Jiyeon tapped her arm, waking her up.

Hyuna's POV

I opened my eyes slowly and the first thing I saw was Jiyeon's concerned face. I blinked a few times and sat up slowly. I wasn't shocked that they were already in my room as they know where I keep the spare key in case of emergencies.  I found Hyemi sitting on the bed cross legged, beside me. She kept her hand on my shoulder and just looked at me. I spaced out, not looking at either of them. 

"Hyuna are you okay? You don't look okay.." Hyemi asked. I stayed silent. My mind was just full of last night's events. I couldn't think about anything else.

"Hyuna...baby.. What's wrong? Where's Jay?" Jiyeon asked putting a hand on my lap. Hearing his name again made my tears roll down my cheeks without me knowing. I could feel the both of them getting panic. 

"Omo Hyuna. What's wrong.. Why are you crying.. Tell us.." I pursed my lips and turned to Jiyeon as its easier to look downwards.

"Jay's gone......" I said softly with trembling lips. Its surprising that I still have so much tears to shed after yesterday's breakdown. Both of them gasped and Hyemi hugged me tightly, giving me strength. I cried even more on her shoulders. I really need someone to hug since last night.

They didn't know about Jay's condition. Obviously they would be shocked. But what about me? I've known about his condition for more than 4 years and Jay had been reminding me about it. It still hit me like a rock has been thrown right to my face. It hit me straight to the heart, mind, soul. Coz that's where Jay is. 

Hyemi and Jiyeon helped me cleaned up my house bit by bit while I showered. It took them quite some time to get me moving. I just don't want to do anything. But what Hyemi said really make me realise I have to get moving. "Hyuna- ah.. What if Jae Hee comes home and sees you like this? Who's going to be his strength? You have to be strong for him at least."

I went down and saw that the living room was already clean, even last night's dinner that was untouched. "You look fresher now.." Jiyeon said, walking to me from the kitchen. She gave me a warm smile.

There was a knock at the door and Hyemi went to open it. I was sitting at the dining table with Jiyeon when I heard a cheerful voice coming from the door. "Omma! Appa! I'm back!!"  I turned and saw a happy smiling Jae Hee running up to me. I stood up from my seat and kneeled down to hug him.

I had to force myself to smile and prevent my tears from falling again. Over his shoulders, I saw my parents standing by the door as Hyemi closes it. They just looked at me with sympathy. We broke the tight hug and Jae Hee smiled at me widely. "Omma, where's appa?" I pursed my lips and caressed his chubby cheeks softly. Its time.

"Jae Hee-ah.. Omma have something to tell you... Appa..is no longer with us. He is never coming back.." I said softly, my voice trembling. He look at me cluelessly, pouting a little.

"Aniya omma. Appa will come back. He won't leave us!"

"Jae Hee, listen to omma. Appa is never coming back. Appa has gone to a place far far away from us. Ara?" I tried to explain to him. I didn't use the term 'passed away' as I know he woudn't understand.

He shook his head. "Aniya aniya.. Appa will come back! He will come back! He's just going to work omma! He will come back!" He pushed me aside and started running away from me, shouting for Jay. I broke down instantly. I don't know what else to do. Hyemi went to my side and my back to calm me down.

My mum went to Jae Hee and carried him. "Jae Hee, my dear. Appa is now with the angels in the skies above. Remember what I always tell you? People who are with the angels are watching over us. Its just that we cannot see them. But they are always with you. So appa is still with you but he is with the angels now." 

"So I cannot see appa anymore?" he asked innocently.

"No dear.." my mum said softly. After that, Jae Hee bawled loudly like a new born baby. He cried and hugged tightly onto my mum's neck. My mum his back softly, murmuring hush sounds to calm him.  Seeing him crying broke my heart into pieces. It hurts to see my baby cry like that. It hurts to know that I cannot do anything to make him better. Its hurts that I can't bring Jay back for him.

I was thankful that my bestfriends were with me all along when I have to settle the funeral. I can't push the fact that Jay is dead. It just keeps repeating in my mind when I'm buying all the things needed and the hardest part of all is his coffin. I was just blunt about everything that whatever was shown I just nodded.

My parents took care of Jae Hee while I'm away. He won't cry when he forgot the fact that Jay is not around. He would ask again and again where Jay is and my parents had to tell him again. And again, he would bawl his eyes out. My parents would make him busy by always playing with him, watching tv shows and other stuff to keep him from asking about Jay. But they are old and get tired easily. They couldn't tame an energetic 4 year old child.

The funeral started and ended well. Everything went smoothly. Jae Hee did not even make things hard for me or my parents. He just sat with me all along during the wake and stood close to me and cried silently when Jay was buried.

We were all back home and Jae Hee was too tired to play or even eat. I hold him close in my arms as I sat on the rocking chair at the balcony. He slept soundly while I rocked him back and forth. I just stare at the clouds, wondering if Jay could really see us from up there. I have to go back to my previous job as a preschooler teacher. Seeing that Jae Hee is schooling, I think I can only do it as a part time job. It won't earn much, but I guess we'll have to start saving up now.

I heard my handphone rang but I was just too lazy to pick it up. Soon I heard the ringing stop when Jiyeon answered the call. I heard faint sounds but couldn’t make up what she said. I couldn’t bother.

I’ve refused to eat or drink anything since the funeral ended. Not that I didn’t want to, I just don’t have the appetite. I heard a knock at the front door and Hyemi helped me to open it. I was backfacing the door so I didn’t see who the guest was. Whoever it is, he or she just want to give their sympathy and words of encouragement to me, just like the rest. I appreciate it but all I needed to have now is strength. Strength to get me through all this.

“Hyuna?” I heard my name being called softly and as I turned, I saw Junhyung standing by the entrance of the balcony.

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PS: I had trouble with this chapter coz I don't actually know how a 4 year old would react to his father's death. So this is just what I imagine. If you think that its illogical, I'm very sorry. :(