IM NAYEON’S POINT OF VIEW

“What? You think you’re brave?” asks Momo jokingly. I smile and smack her arm playfully. Momo laughs and she takes another shot, that’s very bold of her. 

The music inside the club blasted. Tonight, I’m with Jihyo and Momo. Both of them had nothing good to do tonight so I thought of going to the club with them. Nothing beats ending a tiresome week with some booze. Good company, bittersweet liquor, and great music can make things a little better. 

You see, these things rectify me spiritually.  

It may not seem like it but, I love going to clubs. I love drinking with friends. I guess in my past life I was an ahjussi who enjoyed booze.

I look over to Jihyo and notice that she’s just chilling with us, she’s not even drinking one sip of alcohol. The girl is just bobbing her head to the beat of the music.

“Hey, Hirai. I’m everything but a scaredy-cat! Got that?” I pout as I take another shot. I give Momo a dirty look. She mocks me by sticking her tongue out, what a brat.

“Yeah, sure. Say that again when we watch a horror movie. You chicken. ” Says Jihyo, she had this look on her face. Is she mocking me?  

“Try drinking alcohol, you coward. You’re all words without action.” I snap at Jihyo.

She looks at me and makes face. Park Jihyo, the girl who looks like Thomas the train avoids alcohol. I’m not saying she doesn’t drink, it’s just that I’ve never seen her drink around me before. I know that Park Jihyo’s got a very high alcohol tolerance, but for some reason she doesn’t drink when I’m around. 

I’ve heard tons of stories from Sana, Mina, and Dahyun about how I behave after having too much alcohol. 

“Listen to our unnie. Loosen up a bit and grab a drink, Thomas.” Says Momo is a teasing way.

“I do drink.” Says Jihyo assuringly. She looks at us and gave us a look that suggests she’s so done with us. “Look, you think I’d go to a club without drinking? Hell no.” Says Jihyo the train.

“Well, drink up then.” I say as I pour her a shot of soju. She looks at me and then she shakes her head in disapproval.

“You’re probably wondering why I’ve never drank with you.” She looks at me and then she turns her gaze to the shot glass I am holding. She’s probably contemplating whether she should drink or not.

“Yeah. You only drink around Sana, Mina, and Dahyun. Isn’t that unfair? I’ve always wanted to drink with you.” I pout. She rolls her eyes at me. “Yah! I’ll scoop your eyes out. Don’t you dare roll your eyes at me. Tsk.” I tell her.

“Me too! I want to see you drink.” Begs Momo as she snatches the shot glass that was supposed to be Jihyo’s. Momo takes the shot in full swing.

“Yah! Really, Hirai? That was supposed to be Jihyo’s.” I complain. I was about to pour another shot for Jihyo in hopes that she’d drink tonight, but then she cuts me off.

“THIS.” Jihyo points at me. I was taken aback, both Momo and I became quiet. Momo was about to ask what’s up, when Jihyo continued to speak. “This is why I don’t drink when I’m around you guys.” She gave us a disappointed look.

“What do you mean? “ I pretend to sound hurt while Momo pours another shot for herself, only proving Jihyo’s point. Jihyo stares at Momo and then she rolls her eyes.

“You two are supposed to be my Unnies but the both of you need the most supervision.” She tells us. I refuse to believe whatever that’s coming out of .  “You’re a handful when you’re drunk unnie, don’t you know that?” asks Jihyo, her voice soft. She’s careful not to make me feel bad. 

“And you, Momo unnie. You need the most care even when you’re sober.” Says Jihyo as she grabs the soju bottle away from Momo. She pours a shot of soju and hands me the glass. She looks at me and smiles weakly. 

“Yah. Isn’t that too much? Take it back.” It sounded like Momo’s a little offended. She’s starting to act like a teen going through puberty again. It’s weird how puberty came late to her. I don’t know, maybe she’s just moody.

“I’m not taking anything back. “ Jihyo sticks her tongue out. Momo gave her a dirty look.

Ohhh, I smell a diss track in the making.

“You’re no fun. That’s why you look old.” Snaps Momo back. Jihyo looked bothered with Momo’s comment. I guess she’s ready to fire back.

“You always drop your food when you eat, do you have a hole on your chin?” Jihyo snaps back to Momo. I look over to Momo and see fire burning in her eyes. Jihyo’s clearly enjoying the sight because she looked satisfied with her clap back.

Oh God. Do I have to endure their bickering here? Jeez. I went to a club to relax, not to hear a flip top battle. Why the hell are they dissing each other right now? What the hell is wrong with them, really?

“Your voice is so loud, you don’t need a microphone!” Snaps Momo to Jihyo back. Jihyo’s eyes widen.

“Really? Well … You look weird when you dance!” Jihyo shouts at Momo. Good thing the club music was loud enough, if it wasn’t loud enough, people would be staring at us.

“What? What’s so weird about it?” laughs Momo. “Want me to dance for you? I’ll give you the of your lifetime.” Winks Momo. Jihyo’s jaw drops wide open causing Momo and me to laugh hysterically. Well, I guess Momo won this battle. Momo one, Jihyo zero.

The both of them stop and they settle. Momo wore this smile of victory while Jihyo sighed in disappointment. She looked at me and I can see she wants to change the topic.

“I called Jeongyeon, I won’t be able to take care of the both of you once the alcohol kicks in, okay?” says Jihyo.

I look at her in protest. Is this her way of getting back at me and Momo?

“Whyyyy?” I pout. I feel my movements getting lighter. Jihyo looks at me blankly. I look over to Momo whose cheeks have become really flushed. Momo smiles at me, her smile sent a shiver through my spine. She’s creepy sometimes.  “You know Jeongyeon the fun out of anything!” I complain. Momo nods in agreement with what I say.

“You know how much I love Jeongyeon.” Says Momo in an assertive tone. “But then again, the girl’s got no jams. You have to admit that Jihyo-ssi.” She looks at Jihyo, her eyes wanting approval.

“That’s the reason why I called her. Jeongyeon will the fun out of tonight which will make you guys drink less. Therefore, this will make our trip home easy and safe.” Jihyo smiles. She seemed satisfied enough with her reasoning, all I know is that she's also no-fun like Jeongyeon. Party poopers. 

I can’t believe I’m friends with these dorks.

“Well, you’re no fun.” Says Momo in a defeated tone. She looks at Jihyo and signals her to fill her shot glass with some more soju. Damn, this girl can drink. Jihyo then fills Momo’s glass like the submissive younger girl that she is.

“Damn girl, you can pour drinks well.” Momo says as she was starting to slur. Momo pats Jihyo’s head lovingly as she smiles at the girl. Even though they bicker the most, I can still see the affection they have for each other.

“Aish.” I look at Jihyo and give her a disappointed look. “I might as well drink as much as I can before Jeongyeon arrives. “ I tell Jihyo as I pour myself another shot of soju, downing the shot immediately. I look at Jihyo and raise both my eyebrows. “When will Jeongyeon get here? I’ve got to hurry up.” 

“Too late for that. Jeongyeon is already here.” Jihyo smiles. 

As much as I want to scold Jihyo for contacting Jeongyeon, I’d rather not do so. I know Jihyo just wants the three of us to arrive home safely. Besides, I’ve heard that I’m pretty lethal when I’m drunk. I don’t know why they labeled me as “lethal”. What does being "lethal" even mean? I’ve only heard Mina tell me that I get rowdy when I drink. I even asked her to elaborate on what that meant but she refused to do so. Honestly, I wonder why these girls are so cautious of drunken Nayeon. All I know is drunken Sana is the one who people should watch out for. The girl kisses anyone near her. 

Out of nowhere, a hand found its way on my shoulder. I look over to my right and see Jeongyeon. I smile at her.

“Oh! If it isn’t our no-jam bro! Welcome, Jeongyeonieee!” Shouts Momo.

I tapped the empty seat beside me and Jeongyeon obliged and sat beside me. Music blared inside the club. The type of music that people would dance to. Both my feet felt the beat of the music and started to tap by themselves. 

The club was huge, it wasn’t the typical club that’s crowded. Lights flickered to the beat of the music. I look over to Jeongyeon and see her looking over to the dance floor. The girl looked casual. She wore jeans which accentuated her long legs and a white shirt. She looked comfortable. She looked over to me and caught me staring. I just blink, not really taking my gaze away from her.

“What are you looking at?” asks the grumpy girl. Her eyebrows raised and it looked like she was ready to throw hands. 

“What? Am I not allowed to stare at you anymore?” words slipped out of my mouth casually due to the amount of alcohol that I’ve consumed. I look at her, my lips effortlessly pouted. She gave me a disgusted look. “Yah, Yoo Jeongyeon. How dare you look at me like that?” I asked her, trying to make myself sound hurt.  

“Oh my goodness, what’s wrong with her?” Jeongyeon asks Jihyo who’s currently attending to Momo’s needs. Jihyo looks at me and then chuckles.

“It’s just the alcohol talking, Jeong. Don’t act as if you’re not used to drunken Nayeon.” Says Jihyo and she immediately turn her attention back to Momo. They do their thing once again, leaving me and Jeongyeon all to ourselves.

“You should drink some.” I tell Jeongyeon as I pour her some soju. I pass her the shot glass I am using and offer her the drink. She looks at me with hesitation. “What? You think my glass is dirty? Yah, Yoo Jeongyeon!” My voice getting increasingly higher as I talk some more.

Jeongyeon looks at me, she seemed annoyed. I know whenever she’s annoyed. Yoo Jeongyeon is annoyed when both her eyebrows meet and when her forehead scrunches.  She's annoyed when her eyes squint and when she shakes her head. It's these little indicators that show me that she isn't in approval of what she's seeing. It’s weird and amazing at the same time that I know this much about this girl.

“Yah, Im Nayeon! Do you really find it necessary to shout every time you talk?” She asks me. I look at her, I feel my eyes smouldering. I once again try to offer my shot glass to her.

“Are you going to drink or not?” I ask her. She didn’t hesitate and swiped the drink from my hand and engulfed the whole shot. I smile at her. “Such a good girl, you always listen to mommy well.” I jokingly tell her as I pat her head lightly. She just nods. I know she’s just done of my .

“I needed that.” She looks at me, her eyes were tired.

“Just finished your shift?” I asked her.

“Yeah, Jihyo texted me to come here. She told me that she needed HELP.” Jeongyeon emphasized on the word help. I looked at her blankly because I know she was talking about me. “I know it was you again, how can I not come here?” She gave me a pitiful gaze.

“Of course you’d come pick me up. It’s because you love me, right?” I ask her in a cutesy way. She didn’t respond so I just laid my head on her shoulder. Right in front of me was Momo with flushed cheeks and Jihyo who’s just watching over her.

“I came here to watch over you because I got your back. That’s what friends are for.” Jeongyeon replies. I roll my eyes and sit straight up, not minding the fact that I am feeling a little light-headed. I grab the Soju bottle and pour myself another shot of soju, immediately downing the shot without saying a word.

Whatever.

“Would you guys want to come dance with us?” Asks Jihyo, she’s not looking at us since she’s trying to fix Momo’s hair. Momo stares at us, she may look drunk but I assure you she’s just getting started. “Hirai wants to dance, would you guys want to join?” repeats Jihyo, probably making sure that we hear her.

“Nah, we’re good.” replies Jeongyeon. I look at her and Shake my head in defiance.

“No, I actually want to dance.” I tell her. She looks at me, she’s probably thinking I’ve lost my mind.

“Yah, Im Nayeon. Stop being so childish.” She looks at me. Who is she? My mother? My father? 

“Wanting to dance doesn’t make me childish, stupid.” I tell her. She ignores me.

“She’ll be staying here with me.” Jeongyeon smiles at Jihyo and Momo. Jihyo and Momo looked like they were witnessing their parents argue.

“Who says I want to stay here with you?” I ask her. Honestly, at this point, I’ll just say whatever I want to say. Who cares? They probably think I’m just too drunk.

“Did I ask for your opinion?” Jeongyeon looks at me sternly. 

“No. But you should!” I protest. I wanted to come up with a witty clap back but it seems like I’ve run out. 

I look over to Jihyo and Momo. My eyes pleaded for help. But even they cannot go against what Jeongyeon says. 

“Bunny right here isn’t allowed to dance anymore. She might puke on the dance floor. We wouldn’t want that right?” Chuckles Jeongyeon.
 

Ok Boomer. 

“Yeah, you might end up cleaning after her.” Adds Momo as she stands up. Momo and Jihyo link arms as the both of them joyfully walk towards the dance floor. I look over to Jeongyeon but she’s currently scrolling through her phone. She had the audacity to make me sit here and then not talk to me? Is this a joke? 

“Stop scrolling through your phone and talk to me.” I whine, she’s still scrolling through her feed.

“Why would I do that?” She asks me without even taking her gaze off of her phone.

“Because you asked me stay here!” I tell her, I feel my face getting hot. The alcohol is kicking in, I can tell. 

“I didn’t ask you.” She replies, still her attention was on her phone. Sometimes, I don’t understand how her mind works. 

“What? Yes you did ask me to stay here!” I tell her, I become more aggravated by the minute. “Yah. Isn’t this too much? You’re really boring don’t you know that?” I ask her and she looks up, she looked serious. Now, I kind of regret saying that she’s boring. 

“First of all, I didn’t ask you to stay. I ordered you to stay.” She smiled at me. The kind of smile that would annoy anyone. I just glared at her. “Second, I’m not boring. You just have a different definition of fun.” she smiled once again. She then turned her gaze down to her phone, she left me hanging.

“You’re boring and that’s the tea.” I tell her.

“You use twitter slang to cover up for the fact that you’re getting old--” She doesn’t look up when she says this. But I see her smile a little, she’s having fun teasing me. “--and that’s the tea.” she looks at me and she had this smirk on her face. I really wanted to banter with her but it felt like our conversation is becoming pointless, so I decided to shut up.

I turn my attention to the dance floor. The music changed and the lights became dark red. I Look over to where Momo and Jihyo was and as expected, people are starting to slowly gather around them. Oh God, Momo is probably y-dancing her way to the crowd’s heart.

Momo’s got this thing where she just charms the crowd. She’s got this duality where she can be cute and then in a split second become a y goddess. I’ll have to admit it, I’m a fan.

Out of nowhere, Jihyo gets out of the crowd and rushes towards us. She wasn’t with Momo. She was covered in sweat and she’s trying to catch her breath.

“MOMO. Y DANCE. CAN’T STOP HER.” The girl who looks like Thomas the train barely got the phrases out of .

“What?” asks Jeongyeon.

“She says she needs help. Next time use your ears.” I tell Jeongyeon. She looks at me, she’s still confused.

“HELP ME GET MOMO OUT OF THE DANCE FLOOR. NOW.” Jihyo’s Voice was commanding. Even though the club was blaring music, I could definitely hear her voice through the music. 

Jeez, is designed like a microphone. 

I look over to Jeongyeon who’s now standing, she just nods. As she was about to walk away she looked over to me.

“Stay right there. Don’t try to follow us. If you walk right now you’ll end up making yourself more drunk than you already are.” Jeongyeon firmly says as she accompanies Jihyo to the dance floor. As both of them worked through the crowd that Momo has gathered, I felt the need to pee.

I stand up and feel my movements become light. I am now in my ‘drunken high phase’. It’s a term that I coined myself. Drunken High phase means a feeling which I’ve associated with lightness, happiness, and just being carefree in general. I usually get to my drunken high phase when I drink just enough amount of alcohol, just enough not to make me nauseous or throw up. An amount just enough to make my movements lighter.

I look around, my face feels hot. I need to go to the comfort room. 

what Jeongyeon says. 

I run my fingers through my hair before walking towards the comfort room. Good thing I’m not wearing heels and that the wash room isn’t too far away. As I walk, towards the wash room I feel eyes follow me. I’m used to it now. Maybe I look ridiculous? Eh. Who am I kidding? I look gorgeous that’s why people are looking at me. Jeez.

The washrooms were separated by a hallway and people meet and socialize in the said hallway. As I walk through the path, I see people talk, some people smoking, and some smooching. I mean, it’s a club, right? Some people would smooch. As I reach the end of the hallway, I turn right. However, right before I enter the female washroom, a hand yanks me.

“What the ?” I exclaim and I look over to who the hell had the guts to yank Im Nayeon the visual goddess. The moment my eyes meet the perpetrator’s eyes, I freeze. I have never seen this guy before my whole life.

He looked Tall, I’m not sure how tall he is but he was towering me. I couldn’t really describe how he’s built since he’s wearing a hoodie, he’s all covered up. Besides, with all the alcohol I’ve consumed, remembering details is something that I won’t be able to do well. 

“Hey, sweetie… What’s up with you? Don’t you know me?” The guys asks me as he tries to close the distance between us. I take a step back away from him, I feel this sense of dread take over me. 

“Who are you? Get away from me before I call the cops.” I threaten him. Though, threatening him was absolutely unnecessary, I just felt like I had to do it. I’ve never seen him before and I wasn’t sure what he’s capable of.  

“Don’t you know me at all?” He asks, he sounded serious which made the alarms inside my head go off. 

Is he serious right now?

“What the .” I whisper to myself, I wasn’t even sure if he’s trying to prank me or if he really is serious. 

“Seriously, don’t you recognize me?” He asked again, trying to close the distance between us. I take a step back, making sure he could not touch me.

“Do you want me to help you remember who I am?” The guy asks me. My eyes widen with what he says. There was nothing wrong with what he said, it’s just how he said it. The way his voice sounded so devoid of any emotion sent chills to my spine. It was as if I wasn’t talking to a normal person. I take a few more steps back, I want this guy far away from me as possible.

I am in my drunken high phase but I immediately come to my senses when I see him. I do not know him. I haven’t seen him before in my life. He looked cocky and what scares me the most is that he's wearing a cap and sunglasses. Why the hell is he wearing a cap and sunglasses in a club? Where is the sun? What the hell is going on with this guy?

“Do you need something?” I ask him, I try to make my voice as stable as possible. I stand up straight to make myself seem more sober than I really am. I see him smirk. All I can see is his lips and a mole on his lower left chin. I try to look at more things to identify him with but to no avail.

“. Hey! Isn’t this too much?” His mood suddenly shifted. He sounded annoyed. 

I just stood there, frozen. I wasn’t sure what to do. 

“I’ve loved you, Im Nayeon, for years now, and you don’t know me?!” The guy raised his voice. I just look at him, I am frozen in fear. “Hey! Really, Nayeon-ssi? I’m your biggest fan. How the don’t you know my name?!” He exclaimed once more.

“I’m sorry, but my name is not Nayeon.” I try to lie. Of course, I sounded stupid. 

“What? Yah, I’m not dumb. I know who you are.” The guy replies, his voice, I try to remember how it sounds. 

“I’m sorry but you’re talking to the wrong person! Please leave me alone! Please go home!” I scream, hoping that people around me would see that I’m in danger. I felt cold, my hands and feet were cold. I can’t believe this is actually happening to me.

“Go. Shout all you want. No one cares.” I hear him chuckle, I see him smirk too. I just look at him, I want to shout but he’s right, people don’t really care. 

I try my best to rationalize everything but all I can think about are; what is he talking about? Why is he stalking me? Should I know my stalkers? What the hell is wrong with this person? 

The guy must’ve grown impatient with me because he came closer and placed his hand on my left shoulder. I immediately moved away in retaliation, my whole body is shaking as of the moment. I’ve never experienced this much fear my whole life. 

“Yah. What’s wrong with your boyfriend touching you?” He coolly asks. My eyes widen. This guy is ing delusional. I am in front of a psycho, and if I don’t try to run away now, I might not see tomorrow. “How did my beautiful girlfriend’s day go?” his tone abruptly changed. He sounded soft and now he’s smiling, I am very much unnerved. This guy is delusional and I have to get away. NOW. If I don’t, I might end up in a ditch somewhere.

“What’s wrong with you? I’m not your girlfriend.” I stall him, waiting for anyone to help me. I was looking around, trying to get people to notice me. 

“What? Yes, I am.” He replies, he even sounded so sure.

“How can I have a boyfriend if I’m not into men? I mean, at least men like you!” I spat at him, trying to make my voice louder. What’s wrong with the people in this hallway? Why is no one even trying to help me? 

“Are you crazy?” He asks me.The guy reaches for my face and caresses my cheek. My eyes widen, and I feel my airways tighten. I try to look around for help but the people loitering within the hallway are busy with their own business.

“Hey, really! Stop playing hard to get.” He doesn’t shout, but his voice was commanding. I couldn’t talk and my heart was pounding. It felt like this was the end of me. I see the guy smile, he’s so tall that I cannot bring myself to stand up to him, I don’t want to end up hurt.

“Don’t you think we look cute together? I’m your biggest best fan and I’ve watched over you for years now.” He smiles. My heart stops, I couldn’t understand what was happening right in front of me.

“Yah! Aren’t you going to say something back? Am I the one who’s going to do all the talking here?” He babbles. I just look at him, eyes start to water out of fear, I feel my body trembling out of fear. The mixture of alcohol and fear is something that people should avoid. 

“TALK! I never thought you’re one frustrating . Is this how you treat your fan?” He spats again.

“I don’t know you, please leave me alone! Please go home!” I shout at him as I cover my face with my arms. I expected him to hit me in the face. Who knows what this loser would do to me? As I expected the worst, I heard someone familiar shout my name.

“YAH! IM NAYEON! “ a booming voice called out to me from down the hall. It was Jeongyeon. The guy suddenly lets go of me and he backs away a little. He stared at me one more time and then he decided to get away,  running past Jeongyeon, hitting her shoulder in the process. Jeongyeon pauses for a while to look back at the stalker who’s now steps further from us. She then looks at me. She looked annoyed as she charged towards me.

The moment she’s found her way where I was, she swiftly yanked my hand and led me into the comfort room. She checks all cubicles before deciding to lock the comfort room’s main door. Good thing was no one was in the comfort room with us. 

Everything felt weird, I am relieved of course but I just don’t feel right. Still with my body trembling, I just stare at Jeongyeon, I cannot tell her what just happened. This may be stupid but I won’t tell her who that person was.

“People need to pee.” I tell her, trying my best not to tremble.  

She gave me a serious look, both her hands found their way on her hips. It looks like she’s going to give me the nag of the century.

“ARE YOU STUPID?” Her voice was loud and it made me flinch.

“Please don’t scream.” My voice was feeble and I am too worn-out to even argue with her.

“OH, I’LL SCREAM ALL I WANT ALRIGHT!” She never fails to injure my eardrums.

“Jeez. You’re making my eardrums bleed for ’s sake.” I spat at her, she looks at me as if she’s can’t believe what she’s hearing.

“Didn’t I tell you stay where you were? Are you a child?” She starts to nag again. I just look at her blankly, I’ve got no energy for this argument at all. I’m too worn out. “Who the hell was that guy?” She questions, her voice now a little bit toned down. I look at her and just shrug. Honestly, I don’t know mister psycho and I have no plan of telling her what happened. I’ll figure this out by myself. “Then why the hell was he touching you?” She sounded aggravated.

“Yah! Really, Yoo Jeongyeon? I’ve had a rough evening. I don’t need you shouting at me.” I was just irritated. She just shook her head in dissatisfaction. She closed her eyes and looked downcast, I know she’s trying to calm herself.

“There are many predators out there.” She didn’t look up. Her voice sounded stern. I just looked away, I wasn’t in the mood to be nagged at.

“Nayeon unnie, please look at me.” Her voice suddenly became soft. I looked up and didn’t say a word, what was I supposed to say anyway? She looked concerned. “The next time I tell you to stay where you are, please listen.” She spoke softly. I just stare at her blankly, I crossed my arms. Whatever.

“I wouldn’t know what to do if you get hurt.” She looks at me, her eyes were sincere. I didn’t know what to say really, so I’ll just act like a spoiled brat. “You’re my responsibility.” She says, her tone was really serious.

SHUT UP.

Responsibility? What the is she talking about? She has some guts to talk about responsibility. What a nut-job. Dolt.

“You’re clear of responsibility. Don’t bother yourself with me. I can take care of myself.” I tell her coldly. I wasn’t in the mood to argue with her, I just want to make things clear between us. I just want her to know that she shouldn’t feel that she needs to take care of me. I am a grown woman, I can handle my own mess.

“You can’t even go to a comfort room without being followed. Is that what you call taking care of yourself? That’s some world class bull.” I raise an eyebrow at her. She walks towards me and sits on the counter where the sink is installed. I was just standing beside her. I look over to her.

“You’re some world class bull.” I tell her.

“What?” She looked at me, he eyes wide open. “Hey. How can you say that, Im Nayeon? I care for you. You’re my friend.” She smacked the sink counter where she currently sits. She looked frustrated.

I sigh heavily. I looked at Jeongyeon who’s waiting for a response from me. I hate this. I hate everything about this. Everything about this conversation is annoying. I feel my face becoming hotter the longer I engage conversation with this girl. I cross my arms and stare at her.

“Stop being so clueless, Yoo Jeongyeon. I already told you that you’re clear of your responsibility or whatever debt you feel towards me.” I try my best for my voice not to crack mid-sentence.

“What’s wrong with you? I told you I’m your friend---“ I cut her off. I’ve had enough of this conversation, I can’t take any more of this.

“THEN STOP BEING MY FRIEND.” I tell her, my voice echoed inside the washroom. She looked hurt for about a second and then she just shook her head.

“Don’t say that. I’m sure that’s just the alcohol talking.” She tried to assure me, she tried to become the bigger person. However, I’m not having any of this. I looked at her, I was annoyed. I clicked my tongue.

“NO. YOU LISTEN TO ME CAREFULLY. I’M ONLY GOING TO SAY THIS ONCE.” I tell her in my most assertive tone. Even though my movements are now lighter than it was before I drank that ton of soju, I am confident with what I have to say. She just looked at me and sat properly, she’s waiting for what I have to say.

“Am I a joke to you?” I asked her. My voice cracked. I’m not going to lie, I felt a little hurt. “How can you act that way towards me? Why…” I trail off and look at her. “Why do you have to be like that? Why do you have to hang out in our dorm constantly and eat there---“ She cuts me off.

“Nayeon-ah, if this is about the food—“ I cut her off too. Why is this girl too shallow to understand what I am saying? She’s frustrating as .

“--I’m not finished yet. Listen carefully.” I tell her. My words were starting to slur. My thoughts are all mixed up. “Why, why do you have to text me and tell me to accompany you at the bakery? Am I your keeper or something?” these words came out of my mouth effortlessly.

“Nayeon unnie...” She trails off, she seemed really taken aback by what I am saying. 

“Why do you have to always pick me up when I’m drunk?” I ask her. She just looked at me blankly.

“Why do I have to be friends with you? Don’t you know that I hate being friends with you? Don’t you know that?” I ask her, but of course I did not want her to answer. 

“What’s wrong with you…” She trails off, looking at me like she doesn’t understand a thing. Stupid girl.

“Why do you act like the way you do? You’re so annoying. Don’t you know that?” I tell her, not meaning any word that came out of my mouth.

“I never knew you felt that way.” She looked down. Her voice sounded like nothing I’ve ever heard before. She sounds extremely dumbfounded.

“Why does it have to be you, Yoo Jeongyeon?” I ask her, hoping that she’d understand what these words meant. I am hoping that she’s stop being so shallow and start to understand what I am trying to say.

She just looked at me, clueless. Yoo Jeongyeon, this ing dumb-dumb doesn’t understand what I am saying and it makes me want to rip out. How can someone be so clueless? How can someone be more than 20 years old and not understand how the world works? Oh my goodness, I might just bash her head in.

I shake my head and stand right in front of her, not giving the both of us enough space. I looked at her intently. Maybe in her point of view, I’m just some drunken girl babbling whatever that came to her mind. But to me, this conversation is important. I sigh deeply and look into her eyes.

“Yoo Jeongyeon.” I call to her attention. I cup her face in my hands and her facial expression change. She’s taken aback but she’s not pulling away. I held her face gently. “Jeongyeon-ah, let’s stop playing these stupid childish games.” I tell her earnestly, my hands still cupping her small face.

“Jeongyeon-ah, I think I like you.” I whisper. I do not wait for her to respond, immediately I lean in with my eyes closed and place my lips on her lips. My hand as if having a mind of its own, found its way to her nape. My hands, they pulled her close, not wanting to let her go. Her lips, they were soft, as expected. She tasted like vanilla. It felt like our bodies have a mind of their own, they moved in unison and I couldn’t get enough. I wait for Jeongyeon to pull away, but even in my tipsy state, I know that this idiot was also responding.

I open my eyes and realize that she too, is pulling me close to her. I have to admit, she’s pretty strong. I stopped and pulled away from her. I look at Jeongyeon and see that lipstick is smeared all over . I just don’t know whether it’s her lipstick or mine. She’s looking down, probably because of embarrassment. I look at the mirror behind her, and even in my almost passed out state, even though my vision has become a little fuzzy, I notice that I’ve got lipstick all over my face too. That must’ve been one hell of a make out session.

I turn my gaze to her, she’s now looking at me. I wait for her to respond even though cold sweat have started to form on my forehead. I start to feel as if my insides is stirring. I look up and notice that my vision has become increasingly foggy. Oh my Goodness, I shouldn’t have moved so much.

“Are you okay? You look like going to throw up ---“ I cut Yoo Jeongyeon off. Immediately I feel everything that I have eaten today rise up my throat. My eyes widen and I push Jeongyeon out of the way to throw up.

Holy , confessing to her played differently inside my head.